Remembering You

There is always a story behind how and why you became the way you are. A reason you can barely explain to yourself. A shake in your voice that was not there before. A tremor in your hands as you try to explain why you are so different. A fear that if you let someone in, they will hurt you more than ever. And that is something you do not want to repeat.

Or maybe that is not the case. Maybe you lost someone to death, and in your grieving state you decide to change a little at a time. Maybe the loss you had was not of another human. Maybe it was the loss of yourself. The part of you, that made you the best you ever were in the past. The part that made you think better and happier. But maybe that is not the case.

There is always a story as to why you are the way you are. Part of the reason is because of the pain you have been through, the anger you expressed, the tears you let fall, the smile that could only be seen through your eyes, whatever it is. It is why you are you. But never feel ashamed of it. Never expect people to treat you better or the same, if you have changed. Because it is known that humans tend to not like change. They tend to be judgmental about the things they do not seem to like or understand.

But between you and me…

Sometimes as humans we forget that life is fully meant to be lived, but not in the fastest pace. Not in the way we are now. We take the idea that we are living in a fast-paced world, so we must go at their speed. We must see everything as the other humans see it. But this is not the truth. Live your life day by day, second by second. Change how many times as you want. Explore your mind, depths, body, and love every minute of it.

Because if you live your days by the thoughts of others, where are you truly going in life? If you let their negativity seep into your veins, then you are killing the flower that grows inside of you. You are killing the beauty within yourself in order to be accepted by society. You are letting your voice shake, because you cannot face the idea that you were not once hurt as badly as you are now. You were not depressed over the thought that you must perfect yourself in the most imperfect world as far as I can say. You are afraid to open up, because there was once someone there that gave you the world. That say the stars in your eyes, and the galaxy in the way you would open your mouth when you talked. But the sad fact is they never saw you as the universe you are.

They never saw the streams in the veins that pop out of your arms. They never saw your birthmarks, moles, freckles, scars, or stretch marks as the mountains that were created at the best and worst of times. They never saw the moon in the way you would light up at night, or the sun in the smile you had in the morning. They never saw the galaxies inside the universes in your eyes. Or the planets in the way you would speak so in depth about something. They never saw the ocean in your tears or the rivers in the moments that you were so happy you let out a couple tears. They never saw the storms in your anger or the calmness of the winds and rains that come at the right moments when you were at peace. They never saw the way your heart would glow just by the touch of happiness that would show. Or the shooting stars in the creativity you had at the most random hours and moments.

They never saw you as you. They saw you just as a body that was theirs at that moment in time. While you saw all that in them, they were not the ones for you. They did not appreciate the time you spent on them or how much you gave up to be in their lives. So the tremors, the shaking of the voice, and the fear you feel, are all there to show you, they were not the ones you should have in your life. Even if at the darkest times of the night you think about them, just remember all the pain you felt with them in your life. They wanted to change you into something you are. They wanted to destroy who you are and where you are going. Just remember there is someone better for you out there. Someone who is going to see the universe in you and show you every day that you are more than just a galaxy in their eyes. You are going to find people who will see the best in you and encourage you to do better. Do not keep the negative people in your life; bloom and stretch to the sun, because positivity is the best way.

Maybe you are the way you are because you are meant to show the world you are more than just another mindless zombie. Maybe you are meant to shine so that others will see how truly beautiful you and your soul are.