Un2talented (Book 3 of the Un2 Series)

The Aquamino began its deceleration a decade before the destination date on the odometer. Dorian focused on the digits as they clicked into fourteen ninety-nine. His surroundings didn’t have any telltale signs of what era he was in, but then again, he thought the architecture of this period consisted of a lot of columns and stuff. He put the truck into drive and pulled out of the waters of the past and over to the aqueduct on the opposite side of the hall. The waters to the future ran freely, just as Cate said they would. Dorian parked the Aquamino at the culvert’s edge pointing in the direction of the flow.

“Keys, keys, keys. Where to put the keys.”

Dorian had decided to leave the keys behind in case Cadence was able to get to the Aquamino and he was not. Behind the visor seemed to be the obvious choice and ultimately the quickest access.

“Why does such a powerful machine rely on things like keys and French fry oil?”

“You might as well ask why avocados make everything better.”

Dorian jerked back and looked up toward the voice coming from the mezzanine.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you!” A jump-suited figure, its head wrapped in a bandana and face smudged with dirt rustled through a toolbox alongside the gate’s opening. A patch on the coveralls read, “Phil”.

“I’m just doing some routine maintenance on the gate. Yet another quirk of the gods. I mean, you come down the first set of stairs through a magical mist, but you get to the gate and there are gears and shit! Why? I’ll tell you why. My dad’s fascination with the humans and their primitive inventions.”

“Dad?”

“Hephaestus. The same guy that made that truck made these gates. Ya know, there doesn’t even need to be a gate here! He could have arranged for an invisible barrier that required a talisman or an incantation. That was a readily accepted entry device at the time this gateway became available to humans. Nope. Gotta have gears which means I have to check in on this thing every decade or so to make sure it still works. And don’t get me started on spare parts! You wouldn’t believe the inventory I have to keep for every upgrade dear old dad made to this thing as he tweaked the mechanism throughout the centuries.”

Phil pulled a clipboard from the toolbox.

“How did it open when you came through?”

” A hidden foot pedal in the stones alongside the entry.”

“And how did you know to step on it?”

“I didn’t. Cate did.”

“Charlie’s cat, Cate?”

“Actually, she’s Charlie’s coworker, not his pet,” Dorian rebutted.

“Whatever. So, based on the method of access you entered sometime during the twenty-first century. Did the gate make any odd noises? Any scraping or thumping?”

“Uh, I didn’t notice any noises at all. I wasn’t listening for . . .”

“Good enough!”

Phil scratched through a line on the paperwork.

“One less thing on my to-do list. So, you on a quest or something?”

“I would call it more of a rescue mission.”

“Ooo, we don’t get many of those!” Phil closed the toolbox and sat on top of it. “Tell me more!”

“I took part in a ritual. Charlie took my friend Cadence as a replacement for someone being pulled out of the past, but he’s not sticking to the rules of the contract, so I’ve come to try and get her back.”

“That’s Charlie for ya. He’s a smarmy one. Cadence, she’s your true love?”

“No, no, no! She’s my best friend! She’s someone that means the world to me, but not in that way.”

“You are willing to risk your life to save her?”

“She would do the same for me.”

“You two are very fortunate to have each other.”

Dorian blushed.

“So, what’s with the whole pool boy-barbarian vibe you have going on?”

Phil made an all-encompassing swirl of the hand. “And don’t leave out the part about the extra appendage.”

“I woke up a few days ago with the ability to mimic other peoples’ abilities by touching them. I’m some kind of talent sponge, but it only works as long as I make contact with them. I am void of any skills of my own so my friends, who have amazing abilities, grafted their fingers, and Cadence’s hand, to my arm to make sure I’ll have skills I might need during this rescue mission. The fingers are covered with this bracer to keep them protected. If I lose one of the fingers, I’ll lose the skill associated with it. I mean if I lose Leslie’s finger these muscles will deflate like a pricked balloon.” Dorian flexed and then let his arm dangle like a noodle. He waited for a response but got nothing.

“Well?”

“Seems legit. Being the daughter of a god, I’ve seen weirder things.”

“Daughter?” Dorian questioned.

“Last time I checked.” Phil pulled the top of her jumpsuit forward and looked inside. “Yep, daughter.”

“Sorry, I just assumed,” Dorian pointed to the name patch.

“Not enough room for Philophrosyne. Don’t worry, you’re not the first.”

“I’m Dorian, by the way. I should have mentioned that earlier.”

“Nice to meet you, Dorian.” Phil extended her hand. As soon as Dorian touched it, he felt an overwhelming sense of warmth and friendliness.

“It’s very pleasurable to meet you!” He gushed.

“Goddess of friendliness, that’s me. Gate maintenance is just a side gig I do for my dad.”

“Speaking of the gate. Is it functioning?”

“I was just checking gear alignment.”

“So, it’s good to go?”

“Yes, but, before you go . . .”

Phil got up and removed a pocket knife from her toolbox. She then pulled a lock of her hair from beneath her bandana and sliced it off. She took Dorian’s arm and tucked the ringlet into the top of the bracer.

“A little friendliness goes a long way. Put it to good use, Mr. Sponge.”