The Unwanted Luna

I wish that I could say that as the weeks passed that things got better but the truth is that they did not, in fact they got worse.

I would wake up at random times, screaming while trying to claw out my heart and each time it would take an army to hold me down so that they could tranquilize me.

The doctor maintained that I was trying to claw out the bond but I believed that, that was not the case at all.

The bond is invisible just like spirits so it did not make sense whatsoever. I believed that I was trying to literally claw out my heart.

in other word I was trying to end my own life since dying was the only sure bet that the bond would be destroyed and therefore I would be totally free from it.

I hated what I was going through but there was no cure for it. My physical and mental health was deteriorating as days turned into weeks. I had lost a lot of weight, right now I was nothing but skin and bones.

The only bright side is that even though I was not doing okay, my son was thriving and getting stronger but I know it was most likely because he had alpha blood in him. I could already tell that he would be powerful, his aura could already be felt. The nightmares continued and so did the voices. Sometimes I could not even tell what was real and what was not anymore.

Everything in my head was jumbled and messed up. Sophie was my only companion. The only one who came to see me willingly, spent time with me and actually treated me as a person.

Our bond has gotten stronger in the weeks we have spent together.

We have tried piecing the pieces together but with no luck, we still can't figure out what is happening and how we can save me from either dying or going feral.

Sophie tried telling Jayden and Xavier about the creatures I saw but obviously they did not believe her because I was deemed a liar and only made up those creatures so as not to be blamed for my parent's death.

Xavier told her that I was probably making it up to gain sympathy and attention, and that even if it were true once his baby was born, he would personally deliver me to them as a peace offering.

I was hurt when I heard him say that but it wasn't unexpected since he hates my guts so much. I honestly didn't know how much more heartbreak I could take.

I got out of my bed and stumbled towards the bathroom to take a shower. It had been a couple of days since I had showered and I was starting to stink.

Sophie usually helped me to shower since I was too weak and I needed support but she was not around.

she and Jayden had gone to the neighboring packs for pack business and she wouldn't be home till the next day and I couldn't wait that long.

So with the little strength I had I took a shower, feeling refreshed once I finished.

Once I was done I wrapped a towel around myself and headed out of the bathroom and to my surprise I found Bianca seated on my bed like she owned the damned room. She couldn't hide her contempt once she saw me. "What are you doing here Bianca? Have you come to gloat?" I asked her, then I headed to my closet for something to wear. I got an oversized t-shirt and some shorts.

I drop my towel and wear my clothes, not caring that she would see me naked, I wanted her to see what she and Xavier have been putting me through.

"Look, I am tired...so say what you came to say then leave, I don't have all day" I tell her once I realize she has not yet spoken a word.

"Why did you do it Amelia? I just do not get it. They loved you, I loved you...so why would you turn on them like that? That's what I want to know, cause I just can't figure out what would make you want to kill them then make up an absurd story about terrifying creatures, when they were the best parents anyone could have"

"Would you even believe me if I said that I did not kill them? That I did not make up the creatures? That I never lied and everything I said was the truth?" I asked her with a sigh, I have said this over a thousand times but nobody believed except for Sophie.

"No I would not...this is karma Amelia, and I am happy that it has finally caught up with you cause you deserve everything that is happening to you and more, seeing you suffer is my greatest pleasure and I go to sleep everyday peacefully knowing the bitch that murdered my parents is paying for her crimes." I can feel her hatred all the way to where I am standing.

"You are right, this is karma...but one thing is for sure, maybe I am getting mine but soon you will all get yours" I tell her and I can't help the smirk that forms on my face.

It is true, karma is a nasty bitch but at least I can say that I am innocent but what about them? She stands up to leave but just before she goes out the door I call her name, knowing I have to do this for my boy.

"I know in your eyes I am lower than scum, but please take care of my son for me, love him and treat him as if he was your own, please" I tell her but she doesn't respond instead she leaves closing the door behind her.

I just hoped that she would do as I had asked. They may hate me but my baby was innocent and didn't deserve to be punished for something they perceived as my fault.

I hoped that they would love him, that he would never ever lack for anything and that includes love and affection.

'She is right you know' I hear the hissing sound as soon as I am alone.

'You deserve this because you are pathetic, absolutely pathetic'

'She is perfect for Xavier, fit to become luna unlike you'

'You are weak, worthless and useless...you couldn't even keep a mate'

"Please stop! Enough. Just stop it!" I beg.

I hate it, I hate how they make me feel but just like always they don't stop, I only hear their malicious laugh.

'Why should we? We are only telling you the truth'

'Who would want a pathetic excuse of a mate'

'Just give up, end it'

'Yessss...do everyone a favor and end it, save everyone the effort of killing you when you go feral'

I do not want to listen but it is the truth. I am weak and pathetic.

Who would want me? I am already rejected by everyone, what if my son rejects me too? I don't want him to live with the stigma of being related to me.

I know how cruel this pack can be and the last thing I want is him being looked down upon because of me.

Plus the pack wouldn't even care if I died. Neither would Xavier. They would just have to cut him out of my dead body and since he is probably the next alpha, that is if Xavier doesn't deny him his birthright in favor of the first born male he will have with Bianca, the doctors will do anything and everything to make sure he lives.

Just as I was thinking this, a sharp pain cuts across my stomach making me release a scream. Within minutes another one attacks me making me fall on all fours as I grit my teeth against the pain. My breaths are shallow and it is almost hard to breathe.

"Breathe, in and out my queen" I hear a familiar voice. I look up and find glowing red orbs staring straight at me.

If I had not been in so much pain I would have asked him, since his voice is masculine, why he kept referring to me as queen.

"In and out, in and out...they are almost here" he tells me. I hear the door burst open just as the shadow disappears. Xavier and a bunch of others enter my room.

"What is wrong?" Xavier asks while kneeling next to me.

"Doctor...Hospital" I manage to grit out.

Now that I had managed to calm down a little bit, I understood what was happening to me even though it was occurring a month earlier than scheduled.

I was in labor, I was about to have my son, and that scared the crap out of me.