The Book of Azrael (Gods & Monsters 1)

MY EYES BLINKED OPEN AND I NEARLY SLAMMED THEM CLOSED AGAIN. I raised my hand, shielding them from the sunlight streaming through the window. I looked around the unfamiliar room, trying to get my bearings. It was a small space, and I was confused by the shirts hanging on the white walls, each of them with a number printed on the fabric. I turned as Dianna moaned from where she slept next to me.

Dianna.

She shifted restlessly in her sleep and her eyebrows drew together. I reached over, holding my hand above her chest. The rhythmic beat of her heart was strong and I almost wept in relief.

I peeked under the blanket covering me and saw the clothes I wore were new and clean. She had moved us and taken care of me too? I shook my head in disbelief. She claimed to be this dreadful beast yet all she did was look out for others.

I was happy knowing she was alive but upset that it had happened at all. My dream had come true, just as I had seen it. My eyes closed, the memory of watching her die replaying in my mind. I heard the words leave my lips as my vision blurred. It had been my night terror made real. I saw her eyes, saw the light leave as she yanked his hand out of her. His smile had been cruel and satisfied as I’d rushed to her, falling to my knees to catch her body before it hit the floor. The whomping sound of his wings as he’d grabbed the book and took to the air. He’d left the crypt and there had been a clash and a clatter as hundreds of dead fell. Then there was nothing. The world went completely silent without her.

My tears had refused to stop falling, and I hadn’t understood that pain. I had not felt like that in centuries, not since my father had died. I had cradled the empty shell that was Dianna, searching for the light in her gorgeous face. No longer would she laugh at the most inappropriate times. She wouldn’t correct me over the most idiotic things.

She was gone, and I’d felt like a part of me was too. I had known her for mere months, but in that short time, I had grown deeply attached to her. She’d helped me in my darkest moments, steadily pulling me from that deep-seated hatred I had for myself. She’d helped me even when I’d been less than kind to her, and she was gone. I remembered grabbing her heart and placing it back into her chest. I remembered flying through that empty tomb with her, and exploding into the night with her cradled in my arms. All I’d known was that I couldn’t lose her, not without fighting for her. I had promised. I’d drawn a blade and sliced my palm to pour myself into her. I’d concentrated on picturing her whole once more, laughing, happy, and sassy. I’d seen her smiling again. I knew I couldn’t raise the dead or restore lost life, but I had to try.

I had promised her.

The flesh beneath my hand had started to mend from the inside out. Her body jolted as I’d forced more power into her. Veins, muscles, and tissue knitted, as her heart regrew, restoring itself. It had jumped once, twice, and a third time before picking up a rhythmic beat. The tissue above that was next, her ribs and sternum mending. Lastly, the muscles had filled back in and her skin smoothed over, silky and unblemished. My body had ached as I’d poured more into her. The light beneath my hand had flickered, and I hadn’t cared.

I pulled my hand back, making sure I did not touch her.

It had worked, but I worried what the cost would be.

I was careful not to wake her as I shifted out of bed and took a few steps to the door. I slipped out of the room and found myself in a hallway. The walls were crowded with pictures of smiling mortals. Dianna must have taken over a home. I couldn’t hear anyone else in the house and needed to hurry before the family returned.

I jogged down the stairs to the open living room. It was filled with the clutter of an active family and a large gray couch. I stood in the middle of the room and took a deep breath, closing my eyes. I concentrated on Logan, trying to summon a connection to him. I felt the familiar tug but then it stopped. Strange, that had never happened before. I tried again, but ran up against a wall that my power could not penetrate.

Resurrection has a cost.

My father’s voice echoed through my mind. Fuck. I clenched and unclenched my fingers. If I could not summon Logan the normal way I would need to do it the mortal way.

I walked toward the well–lit kitchen, searching for a phone. I picked up the small black device and dialed the number Logan had forced me to memorize.

It rang once and was answered with a sharp, ‘Hello?’

‘Logan. It’s Liam. I need you to meet me somewhere. Only you.’

I told Logan everything. The same way I had done years before on Rashearim. I told him about El Donuma in every gritty detail. I told him of the fight, Dianna’s death, her resurrection, and the new threat we faced.

‘It has been eons since we have faced an actual threat. These weren’t the normal soulless beasts I have encountered previously. No, this was much worse,’ I said as we sat in the large living room.

Logan’s gaze searched mine before pointing toward the ceiling and the room where Dianna still slept. ‘You did the unthinkable Liam.’

‘I know.’

‘Even if she didn’t truly die, resurrection is taboo. Forbidden. The horror stories we heard about the damage it could cause. It could have backfired and you could have ended up an empty husk.’

‘I know.’ My voice came out a little harsher than I intended.

‘Do you love her?’

I sighed and leaned my head back, resting it on the sofa. ‘Why does everyone keep asking me that?’

‘Well, she is a very attractive female with a very persuasive vocabulary that some,’ he paused as he gestured, ‘men who haven’t had female attention in a while, may find alluring.’ He made a noise in his throat, clearly uncomfortable.

‘Does your wife care if you speak so fondly of other women?’ I arched my eyebrow at his response.

‘I-no-I’m talking about for you,’ Logan retorted, frustrated.

I said nothing, and he sighed, realizing my agitation.

‘All I am saying, Liam, is this isn’t you. You wouldn’t risk this for just any woman. I know you. That kind of power—you don’t know the damage it could cause, and not just for you or her, but the universe. They always spoke about a catalyst that unbalanced everything. You know that.’ 

He was so wrong. If he knew what I did to Rashearim, the gods there, he would think differently. He would know that I was completely aware of my destructive nature and how dangerous I was to everyone around me. I ran my hands roughly through my hair as I sat there. ‘I know.’

I felt the weight of the couch shift next to me as Logan sat. ‘Thank you for telling me. I do miss the days when you would actually talk to me.’ He laughed, but I knew it was forced. ‘So what’s next?’

‘Have you heard from the vampires I sent?’

Logan nodded his head. ‘Yes they made their presence very known. Gabby likes the loud one a lot and they seemed to bond over some stories I did not care about.’

I snorted folding my arms Logan having the same deposition towards him as I.

‘That’s Drake.’

Logan shrugged. ‘Neverra is with them both. I think she spoke of coffee or something. I made a few other celestials go with them. Regardless if Gabby likes them I don’t. I don’t know what it is but I don’t want to leave the girls alone with them too long. And if what you said about the Four Kings still being alive is true, well then, they can’t be trusted.’ 

I turned my head and a small smile formed. The way he was protective of Gabby would make Dianna happy.

‘Drake may be boisterous but he is harmless. More so an annoying flirt.’

A low growl ripped through Logan ‘If he flirts with Neverra I’ll rip him to pieces.’

A small laugh coursed through me before I sighed leaning forward and rubbing my head. ‘Yes. That is fair. I don’t know. Something just feels off. Wrong.’ 

‘A possible side effect maybe?’

‘Maybe or maybe something else is stirring. It feels like I can’t keep my head above water.’ I let out a long breath. ‘I need to get to The Council. If Victoria brought any more of Azrael’s scrolls or texts from Rashearim, I am hoping they will know of them.’

‘If you go to The Council, Imogen, Cameron, and Xavier will bombard you the moment you step foot in the city.’

‘I know, that’s why you are coming,’ I paused rubbing my hand under my chin before looking toward the stairs, ‘and Dianna.’

His eyes widened. ‘How are you going to sneak an Ig’Morruthen past The Council?’

‘It’s not an Ig’Morruthen, it’s Dianna. She was mortal at one time, have some respect.’

Logan nodded, but I saw a glint in his eye. Was he testing me?

‘My apologies,’ he said sincerely, a corner of his mouth lifting. A test indeed.

I nodded, moving on. ‘With that being said, I do have a plan for that too. To start, I need you to find us some clothing so that we will fit in. I am too drained to summon any garbs at the moment.’

‘Done,’ Logan said without asking any further questions.

I stared at the ceiling, feeling as if I had missed something. ‘Something seems off to me, Logan.’

‘We will figure it out. If worse comes to worst, you have a queen on your side.’

I snorted at his statement before dropping it. He was right. Dianna gave us a better chance but just a slight one. She was powerful, but she refused her nature which kept her at a disadvantage. Although, I might have a solution for that, but it was not one I wished to share with him.

‘You’re right,’ I replied. Logan’s look of shock nearly making me smile. ‘Their power far out measures any Otherworld creature. Even my father feared the Kings of Yejedin.’

Logan sucked in a breath at my revelation. ‘What I don’t get is how they got here? The realms and gates have been locked for so long that nothing with that much power should exist.’

‘I’m starting to think they have been here a lot longer than we thought. Moving behind the scenes, planning and waiting for—something,’ I said. 

‘Waiting for what?’ Logan asked, staring at the wall, seemingly lost in thought.

‘That is a very good question.’

Logan stood and wiped his hands on his pants before turning toward me. ‘I will go get us something to wear and be right back.’

‘One more favor,’ I asked without getting up.

He stopped, turning slightly. ‘Yes?’

‘I need you to distract Imogen.’

‘Oh, may the old gods protect me.’ He sighed before disappearing from the room in a flash of cobalt light.

The living room fell silent once more as I rubbed my hand over my face. I should have been faster and killed Tobias when I had the chance. I should have made my move and gotten to him before he got his hands on her. She sacrificed herself for me, for the world, and I’d resurrected her without a second thought. My own father would not bring back my mother, the one person he had loved with every atom of his being. Yet, I’d brought back a smart-mouthed, ill-tempered caring woman. I was as selfish and weak as they claimed because I hadn’t brought her back for the world or even for her. I brought her back because I didn’t think I could exist in a world without her. 

A God does not think of his own wants or needs but of the needs of others, the ones he protects. My father’s words rang in my head. He was right then, and he was even more right in that moment. Even Tobias had seen it, and he was right when he’d said that Dianna had gotten under my skin. My minor curiosity with her had morphed into a deep caring and a protectiveness that I could not control. It had cost me the Book of Azrael and a part of me didn’t care.

A scream echoed through the house, and I was on my feet and up the stairs within seconds. I burst through the door to find Dianna sitting up in bed, clutching her chest. She turned to me, her eyes wide and unmoving.

‘You really are a World Ender.’