The Book of Azrael (Gods & Monsters 1)

DARKNESS. THAT’S ALL THERE WAS, AND YET, MY BODY FELT WARM, WHOLE. I was held in a tight embrace as if I were wrapped in a lover’s arms. I couldn’t move, but I also didn’t want to. Was this Asteraoth? Had I finally found peace?

The middle of my chest throbbed, erupting in a fierce and piercing pain, spreading through every part of my being. It was liquid hot, drenching me from the inside out. I tried to move, fight, kick, anything to get away from that horrible blinding pain. It felt as if someone had poured lava into the space where my heart was supposed to be. Had I not ripped my heart out? Was Tobias finishing the job? No, that was wrong, too. I’d felt Tobias rip into my chest and shred it. So, then where was I? What was happening to me?

Come on. Come on.

I heard someone pleading, the sound a mix of a sob and a beg. My thoughts stopped as a warm liquid started filling my throat. Ambrosia. It’s the only way I could describe it. My body ached at the taste. My whole being suddenly felt alive. It had to be the greatest thing I had ever tasted. My whole body tingled, nerve endings sparking and firing. I gained more control of my limbs with every gulp. I wasn’t dead. I wasn’t even close to death. Not when I felt like this. The world came rushing back to me as I took another gulp. The sound of the wind, birds, and a groan filled my ears. I felt my hands gripping whatever the source was of this amazing elixir as my eyes shot open.

I saw the open night sky above. We were in a grassy expanse, trees lining the edge of the field. My vision cleared and the stars slowly came into focus along with the silhouette of a large figure hovering over me. All I could see was the pure silver of his eyes, and I realized the amazing thing I tasted was indeed blood. Liam’s blood. He knelt on one knee, the other foot flat on the ground, cradling me against him. My head was on his powerful thigh and his wrist shoved in my mouth. My eyes were adjusting to the dark and I could see the lines of pain on his face. The groan I had heard earlier was from him as I wasn’t feeding gently. I took my teeth from his flesh and moved my head to the side.

‘No.’ I reached up, trying to push him away.

‘Dianna, I physically put your heart back into your chest with my bare hands,’ Liam snapped. ‘Now, drink!’ He shoved his wrist back into my mouth, not giving me time to respond.

I bit again, gently this time, holding his wrist with both hands as the sweet flavor filled my mouth. I let out a moan as my body healed in places I didn’t realize I was hurt. Liam swallowed hard as I drew another mouthful out of him. I knew what it felt like to be on the receiving end of a bite. There was venom in our fangs. Most mortals described the sensation as a warmth that sent shock waves to their core, something akin to desire.

It made it easier to feed if the person allowing it felt pleasure instead of just pain. It could be intimate, to say the least. It was a characteristic that we passed down to the vampires and every blood -drinking creature. Evolution was a tricky bitch. We had to feed just like the lesser creatures we spawned, and blood carried life. It held the purest and most potent magic in the world. It was the only thing that determined the living from the truly dead.

‘Easy,’ Liam murmured.

I looked up at him, my lips gentling as I swirled my tongue over the wounds I had made before moving his wrist away from my mouth. ‘That’s enough. I’m fine now. Promise.’

‘Dianna—’ he started to say something else, but I was already trying to stand up.

Liam grabbed my upper arm, helping me to my feet. I glanced at his wrist and saw he was healing, but slower than normal.

‘Thank you,’ I paused, gesturing toward his wrist, ‘for that, and putting my heart back in my chest.’

He looked at me, a shadow of a scowl tightening his features beneath the layer of dirt and grime. He looked pissed but only nodded.

I looked down at my torn and tattered clothes. There was a hole in the front of the tank I was wearing and it was covered in blood. I pulled the ruined material away from my body, and I could see the shiny raised flesh between my breasts where my heart had been ripped out. I lightly touched the spot, still tender from healing, as Liam’s words rang in my head. Had he really put my heart back? I had to have been dead for a moment before he tried to feed me. He’d saved me. He always saved me. I looked up, meeting Liam’s eyes for a moment before raking my eyes down his body, checking for wounds.

We had been through so much in the last few hours. Liam’s clothes looked like they had gone through a shredder. He was covered in ashes, dried blood, and gore, his hair plastered to his skull with only gods know what. I looked down at myself, noting that my look was no better. I took in our surroundings and the giant hole a few feet away from us.

‘What happened?’ I asked.

‘Which part, Dianna?’

Yeah, he was mad.

His hands flew to his hips. ‘The part where you did not hesitate to take your own life or the part where Tobias secured the last living relic of Azrael?’

I looked down for a second, pursing my lips. ‘I guess both?’

‘It is not funny.’ He ran a hand over his face in weary frustration.

‘I wasn’t making a joke. I did what needed to be done. You were going to risk the book for me. I saw it, saw your hesitation. I know the face you make when you are calculating.’

He took a step forward, and I noticed he swayed even if he did not. ‘You had no idea what I was going to do and should not have attempted to discern my intentions. You’ve known me for mere minutes in the grand scheme of things, and should not assume you know what I will or will not do.’

‘So you weren’t going to save me?’ My brow ticked upwards as I folded my arms.

‘Yes, I would have saved you and the book, but you gave me no choice. You chose for me.’  

I scoffed. ‘You wouldn’t have and Tobias would have gotten the book I—’

‘You do not know what I am capable of!’ It was the first time Liam had ever raised his voice at me, and I flinched. Not because he scared me but because of what I heard in those words. He didn’t yell at me as Kaden had or degrade me as others. He shouted and his voice trembled with fear.

‘Liam.’

‘You gave me no choice. No choice. You let Tobias rip your heart out. He grabbed the book, and I flew through the collapsing temple with the remains of you. There’s your recap.’

‘I did what I thought was right.’

‘For who?’

My head reeled back. ‘For you, for the world, for my sister. You and everyone have done nothing but preach how important this damned book is.’

‘Preach? As if you have not done a single thing this entire fiasco but preach over our partnership and yet you did not trust me enough to know I could have saved you and gotten ahold of the book.’ 

‘I’m sorry, okay? Is that what you want to hear? I’m sorry, but I gave you the perfect opportunity for this to be done. Don’t spin this around and make me the bad guy here. You’re pissed, but I didn’t ask you to save me. I gave my life so that you and everyone else would have theirs.’  

‘And what of yours, Dianna? You always do this. You willingly try to throw yours away as if it means nothing. As if you mean nothing.’

He stopped, his jaw clenching as he turned away as if he couldn’t look at me. Pain stabbed me, but it was just for a moment because he spun back and pointed at me. ‘You should have trusted me more, Dianna. After everything we have been through, why would you think I would ever let anything happen to you?’

I didn’t say anything because I honestly couldn’t find words. It had never occurred to me he would try to bring me back, yet here I stood.

He looked around the destroyed terrain. ‘We have to leave now. I don’t know how long it will take for Tobias to reach Kaden.’ He met my gaze, his eyes tired.

‘It’s dark enough I can fly us out of here without us being seen.’

He shook his head as he raised his hand rubbing his temple. ‘Too risky and you were just—dead.’ His voice cracked on the last word. 

I started to say something, but stopped when I saw him sway on his feet. ‘Liam. Are you okay?’

‘Fine. I’m fine,’ he said right before his eyes rolled up into his head and he fell forward. I caught him, stumbling beneath his dead weight as I tried to keep him from hitting the ground face first.