Desire for you- ALPHA RYAN Book 1

CATHERINE

Ryan ran out of the room. Kilian and I looked after him, while Kilian rolled his eyes and sat down next to me. "Don't worry about him, he'll come to his senses. It sometimes takes us men a tad longer." he smiled warmly at me and held my hand.

I just nodded slightly and, unlike Kilian, was simply frustrated.

I couldn't figure Ryan out. Sometimes he wanted to get closer to me and then he was the aloof idiot again.

The doctor did his work and took another small tube of blood from me and handed it to Kilian. "Smuggle it to him under red wine or something," he said, grinning.

Kilian laughed. "Who knows, maybe we'll let him suffer a little longer." He took the tube and put it in his pants pocket. "I'll give it to him," he said.

I just glared at him. "Come on Cate, läächeeelnn..." Kilian pinched my cheek.

I didn't feel like laughing. In fact, all I wanted to do was cry. This damn bond was driving me crazy. It was worst over a full moon in the woods. I thought I would die. Luckily Rose was more steadfast and supported me as best she could. I looked at my fingers, which looked like sticks because of my weight loss. The whole thing was getting better and better.

"Listen, I'm really tired. Could you guys leave me alone?" i asked Kilian quietly. He sat back down with me. "I won't leave you alone, you'll eat first and then you can sleep for all I care." He was pretty stubborn. No wonder they chose him to be the alpha successor. Someone else couldn't do better than him.

"How is mom?", I asked him. His smile slowly faded. He took my hand and sighed "You know, after your disappearance, a world collapsed for your mother.... She started to become forgetful, cried every night, she blamed your father every day for not being able to protect you. She is miserable. I promised her I would find you and bring you to her." He whispered the last sentence softly.

Tears welled up in my eyes and I couldn't help sobbing. My heart was breaking knowing that my mother was not well and she was also suffering from my disappearance....

"G-Glease let her know that you found me Kilian.... I don't want her to suffer any longer." I said and he nodded in response. "Already done." He smiled at me again. I hugged him and was glad he was here "Thank you Kilian..."

Maya came into the room carrying a tray full of food. She smiled at me "Well little mouse, how are you? I brought some refreshments." I looked at the tray which was full of food "That looks good." I said gratefully and slowly sat up.

"Oh that's nothing, you'll have to see me cook at Christmas, it'll be something for the eye." She winked at me and walked back out of the room.

The doctor and Cynthia were now gone as well. Only Kilian and I remained in the room.

I started to eat. "Would you like some too? I think there's enough for two."

He shook his head "No it's all good. I'll eat something later. Finish eating and then rest, I'll be in my room. I have some pack business to take care of from here." He made his way to the door and then was gone.

Now I was finally alone. Rose said nothing, she was silent.

I glanced at the iPhone that was on the table. I grabbed it and the AirPods.

I opened Spotify and let music play. I left the food again and went back to bed.

Oh, it's just me, myself and I

Solo ride until I die

'Cause I got me for life

Oh I don't need a hand to hold

Even when the night is cold

I got that fire in my soul....

I sighed and closed my eyes. Time flew by and I must have fallen asleep.

I didn't hear anything through the headphones and when I opened my eyes, my gaze stopped at Ryan, who made himself comfortable in the armchair across from my bed. I sat up abruptly and took the headphones out of my ears.

He merely looked at me calmly and said nothing for the first time.

I was uncomfortable with him watching me like that.

"Is something wrong?", I asked him, glancing briefly at the window and then back at him.

He stood up and came closer to me. Automatically, I pulled my legs closer to me and already felt the headboard of the bed behind my back.

Ryan stopped and looked at me with one eyebrow raised.

"I don't want to hurt you..." he said, moving closer to me.

"That's what you said last time." I muttered softly to myself.

He nodded and ran his hand through his black hair, his brown eyes had an intense aura and he smelled incredibly good. Woody and musky notes combined with cedar. It was a sensual scent he had about him. He sat down next to me on my bed and grabbed a pair of headphones.

"What are you listening to?" he asked me, simply pressing play.

I just shrugged my shoulders and didn't give him an answer.

It was playing from Eden Projects-Crazy in Love.

He leaned back against the headboard of the bed as well. "I'm sorry...about what all happened. It should have gone better." He turned his head toward me.

I didn't know from me what he expected. For me to act like nothing ever happened?

I nodded. "Yeah, that really sucked." I simply said.

He grabbed my hand gently. I flinched at his touch and wanted to pull my hand back. He, however, held it tightly and wouldn't let go of me.

His touch caused sparks in our companion bond, probably because it hasn't completely broken off yet.

I looked at him "I am asking you to give me one last chance.... I want to show you that I mean business..."

I gulped at his words.

He was pointing a knife at me with his words. It was either him or a broken bond.

He gently stroked my hand with his thumb. I bit my lower lip, not knowing what to say. I was just speechless at that moment.

"If this whole thing doesn't work out, then I'll be gone forever."

'Are you sure? You know we can overcome a broken bond...' Rose said to make her point to me. She didn't want anyone to give me a choice, with an 'either/or' option. She would stand by me even if I chose not to.

'I know Rose... But I can't right now. I can't take all of this. If all this doesn't work out, then we'll go back to our pack with Kilian,' I said.

I closed my eyes and let the partially destroyed bond heal again. A powerful energy bubbled up inside me, Ryan's energy.

I opened my eyes and looked at Ryan. A faint smile had appeared on his lips.

"This bond you feel, I just want to remind you that it can be gone again." I would go through hell again if I had to.

Ryan nodded. "It won't come to that again." He put his hand to my cheek and stroked it.

"Never again." he whispered softly. He pulled me into his arms and held me close.

I allowed his embrace and exhaled in relief.

Now that I realized I was in his arms, it occurred to me that I needed a shower. In fact, I was almost uncomfortable being in his arms in this state.

"You left your food?", Ryan asked me, glancing over at the tray.

"I kind of didn't feel like it. Although Maya did an excellent job cooking." I said, looking up at him.

"How about you and I go out to dinner tonight?" he asked me. I thought about it. Going out. A word I hadn't heard in over a year.

I nodded slightly "I'd love to" I smiled at the thought.

He looked at me for a moment. "Is something wrong?" i asked him uncertainly.

He shook his head "No, I like it, only when you smile." he said.

My cheeks turned slightly red with embarrassment.

"We're going to the best Italian restaurant. Get ready." he said and stood up.

He walked to the door "I'll see you later." he said and walked out of the room.

'Oh god, what am I going to wear.... I'm not in the know about what to wear to a fancy Italian restaurant.' I said to Rose, who just grunted.

'Why don't you ask that Maya girl, or whatever her name is, maybe she can help you out,' Rose said to me, and took off again.

Hmm, maybe that really wasn't a bad idea. But first I had to bathe myself.

I went to the closet and took out some fresh underwear. Cynthia hadn't really made it easy for me when it came to choosing underwear.

I stuck with my favorite color, black, and grabbed a bra with no filling, just a lace trim, and matching panties to go with it.

I took my bathrobe and went into the bathroom.

I let the water run hot so that everything in the bathroom was befuddled and the mirror turned white.

I grabbed a shampoo that was in the rack. Somehow Ryan only had expensive stuff here in the house, which I didn't really know that way from my pack. The shampoo had a scent of roses.

After I washed, I turned off the water, toweled myself dry, and dried my hair.

My hair reached my waist and was silky smooth. I saw that next to the sink was a toiletry bag with makeup.

I opened the small bag and saw what makeup was there.

I put on my makeup discreetly.

I looked at myself in the mirror. I hadn't looked this good in a long time.

'Rip that guy's head off,' Rose purred, which made me smile.

I walked back to the room and spotted a dress, shoes and a bag on the bed.

The dress was a black satin dress that was body hugging and had spaghetti straps.

The shoes were by Yves Saint Laurent, shiny black.

I took the dress in my hands. Had Ryan put this here? I asked myself, holding the dress closer to my body.

Hmm, the bra would be due now. I took off my bra and unzipped the dress.

I put it all on and looked at myself in the mirror.

'Wow' said Rose, panting happily. 'You sure dressed up lady.'

I nodded slightly and ran my hand through my hair.

Suddenly I felt two hands at my waist holding me. I got goosebumps at the touch and saw in the mirror that Ryan was standing behind me.

"I came to see if you were coming, I was almost afraid you changed your mind."

He also looked at me in the mirror and put a necklace around my neck. The necklace was gold and had a small plate in the shape of a scroll.

"You look beautiful, Cate..." He whispered against my ear.

Goosebumps.

I swallowed and looked at him, "Thank you." I eyed him for a moment.

"You look good too." He had also dressed up and was wearing a tailor-made suit by Hugo Boss, his hair was nicely coiffed to the side as always, a beautiful watch by Citizen, adorned his wrist. He was actually a dream, to every woman.

That he called me Cate was unusual for me, from his mouth it sounded so... so sexy.

The companion bond made me warm up.

"Shall we go?", I asked him. Before I was still completely aroused by him.

'I thought you didn't like him? Rose had to grin at my thoughts.

'I don't know what's gotten into me either,' I said to her grudgingly.

'I look and stare so deep in your eyes

I touch on you more and more every time

When you leave I'm begging you not to go

Call your name two, three times in a row

Such a funny thing for me to try to explain

How I'm feeling and my pride is the one to blame

'Cause I know I don't understand

How your love can do what no one else can...' Rose hummed in my head.

Ryan nodded and put a hand around my waist. He handed me another black coat, which was neatly hung on a hanger behind the door.

Some of the wolves who were in the pack house and working looked at us in confusion. I was very uncomfortable with the looks. I also saw Kilian walking by, who just smiled and waved at me.

I pulled the coat closer to my body as if I were naked and continued walking with Ryan to the garage.

He took the keys of his BMW M5, which was painted black.

He drove off towards town, not really slowing down.

I held on tightly so I wouldn't scream out. He grinned at me and let the radio play. It was playing French Montana-Unforgettable.

After a twenty minute drive, we finally arrived.

The restaurant was called Sole Mio and was decorated with 5 stars.

Finally we walked in and were already expected. We were escorted to our table and Ryan pushed the chair behind me like a gentleman.

I had to smile a little, he was usually the daredevil.

As he sat down, we were handed the menus.

"Tell me about yourself. "