Deserted (Shadow Beast Shifters Book 4)

Once outside, it took me a few minutes to calm my racing heart.

It was so frustrating to be knocked by such strong emotions again, when I’d spent centuries learning how to control and manage every aspect of my physical being. I was out of control, and if I didn’t get a handle on it soon, I was likely going to self-destruct in a very unpleasant manner.

I couldn’t let that happen around Reece. I would not give him the satisfaction.

‘Angel!’ Simone called my name as she appeared in the street. ‘Are you okay?’

Releasing a slow breath, I prepared to lie, but somehow the damn truth came out instead. ‘I’m struggling.’

Her dark eyebrows shot up and nearly collided with her equally dark hairline. ‘Oh, fuck. I have to say that’s about the last thing I expected you to say, and I’m somewhat freaking out that you’re being so open with me.’

Simone and I had never spent much time together, our greatest bond being our love for Mera. But I appreciated her forthright response and decided to continue in the same manner. ‘Since my rebirth, my emotions have been awakened in a way that I never anticipated. I mean, I’m old—older than you probably think—and it took me a very long time to learn how to control every aspect of my being. Yet here I am, like a youngling again, unable to deal.’

Simone took a step closer to leave only a few inches between us. There were no shifters on the street nearby, but she still lowered her voice. ‘How old are we talking here?’

Some of my angst died, and I couldn’t help my smile. ‘Ancient. Trust me on that.’

She rocked back on her heels. ‘Damn, girl. Older than Shadow?’

This time my smirk turned into a smile.

‘Much older.’ Shadow’s deep voice came from the front door of the shop as he stepped out with Mera. ‘She was the monster in the shadows before me.’

I glared at him, hoping he’d shut up. ‘That was a former life. Now I’m just… Well, I have no idea who I am, but I’m hoping that I have a chance to find out.’

Mera wasted no time hugging me, knowing in her own way that I was struggling, even though I hadn’t told her in so many words. ‘It’s going to be okay,’ she whispered as she pulled away. ‘I see a bright future for you, Angel. There’s a reason you were reborn—a reason greater than the fact that I don’t think I could have survived without you. We just need to be patient, and the truth will reveal itself.’

Simone reached out and grabbed her hand, joining the three of us together. ‘Pregnancy has made you all philosophical. I like it.’

Mera tightened her grip on her best friend. ‘It has, and with that in mind, I’m wondering if you’re ready to tell me what happened between you and a certain vampire. I really hate when my bestest best friend is hiding shit from me and won’t let me help.’

Whatever joy and mirth had been in Simone’s face vanished so fast it was as if someone had taken a cloth and erased it with a swipe. ‘I can’t,’ she choked out, her voice rasping like she’d hurt her throat. ‘The compulsion makes it difficult, and until I figure out how to break it, the rest would be confusing.’

Mera’s lips thinned. “I need to kill Lucien, just stake the bastard right through the heart.”

Simone coughed before shaking her head. “No, please. It wasn’t his fault. He tried to help me, but some shady crap went down in Valdor. Now I just need to move on with my life, forget it even happened.”

Mera still didn’t like it, but she also didn’t argue again. For today at least. “Yeah, I guess I can respect that. I just hate seeing you hurt with no way to make it better.’

Simone hugged her fiercely, holding on like Mera was her lifeline. ‘I know you do, and I love you for it. But I promise,’ she pulled away, ‘I’m doing okay. I might even start dating again soon, and hopefully, that’s the step forward I need to move past Valdor.’

“Dating again is good.” Mera nodded. “It would be nice to know someone else is looking out for you since your parents are humans living their shitty lives out in the real world.”

Simone let out a rueful laugh. “Not like they were that interested even when they lived here.”

“True dat,” Mera replied with a sad smile.

Shadow cleared his throat, interrupting them. ‘In regard to dating, I would suggest we don’t mention it to Lucien. He’s got a temper when it comes to Simone, even if he won’t admit why.’

Simone crossed her arms protectively over herself. ‘He has no right to even think about me let alone have a temper over it. He made his choice, and now I’m making mine. You tell him whatever you want, but make sure you mention that I’m doing fine. I have my own business, and there’s a shifter I’m flirting with who I might even take a chance on. I don’t need or want that vampire in my life.’

Shadow just nodded, his expression remaining neutral, but I knew him well enough to know there were deep thoughts lingering below the mask.

Simone, done with this conversation, turned back to Mera. ‘How long can you stay? How long until I’ll see you again?”

Time moved differently between Earth and the other realms. If we were in the Desert Lands for a few weeks, it could easily translate into two months in Earth time.

‘We have a few minutes,’ Mera said quickly. ‘Should we grab some lunch? Baby is hungry.’

That got her mate moving, and he immediately rushed us into a nearby cafe, which proudly displayed a specials board offering beef stew, venison rump, and a whole rabbit spit roasted.

Shifters hadn’t evolved far from their beast forms, especially in their eating habits.

On the inside it was like every other diner I’d seen in this world: lots of booths, a red-and-white checkered theme, and a long bar that housed the drinks, sauces, cutlery, and a few bored looking shifters. As soon as they noticed our arrival, three of them rushed forward to help us into a booth.

“Mera!” one of the females with light golden-brown hair and large grey eyes exclaimed. “What are you doing here?”

Mera’s expression didn’t give much away as she said, “Hey, Greta, how’re things? I’m just visiting Simone to catch up, and we’re hoping to get some of that world famous stew.’

Greta swallowed roughly, her eyes darting to Shadow and then back to Mera when she couldn’t hold the beast’s gaze for longer than a heartbeat. ‘For everyone?’ she squeaked.

Mera glanced at me, and I shook my head.

‘Just two please,” she said to the waitress, “and some water.’

Greta hurried off then, a little unsteady on her feet. ‘This crap happens every single time Shadow walks among the shifters,’ Simone snorted. ‘One would think he was a god or some shit.’

Shadow’s chest lifted as his usual rumble of annoyance escaped.

‘Don’t worry, mate,’ Mera said as she patted his arm. ‘I’ll protect you from the ladies.’

His brow furrowed as he narrowed his eyes on her, but before he could comment, Mera was turning away, already occupied by her friend. ‘Jaxson is in NOLA at the moment,’ Simone said. “And together with the other three alphas, they’re actually doing a really solid job of managing Torma.’

‘I didn’t think it would work,’ Mera replied, just as the stew arrived. Greta placed two huge, white ceramic dishes on the table, followed by glasses of water. ‘More than one alpha seems like a recipe for disaster, but it appears that it’s actually created a more levelheaded approach, a council that votes on decisions.’

Simone, who’d already started to eat, took a second to swallow before answering. ‘Pretty much. Majority vote, and there’s more pack voting going on as well. Since the Wolfe family was run out of the top job, it’s been peaceful here.’

Mera, now the one shoveling in spoonfuls of soup, just nodded. ‘Have you heard anything about Torin?’ she finally asked when she came up for air.

None of us were surprised when Shadow muttered, ‘Should have torn his fucking head off.’

‘Not a peep,’ Simone said her lips twitching. ‘He’s probably dead. The common cold kills humans apparently, and that bastard would get man-flu for sure.’

Shadow looked pleased by this truth as he relaxed into his corner of the booth, making the large area look small.

‘I’m going to track him down one day,’ Mera said. ‘I’m curious to see what he’s chosen to do with his second chance—and whether Sisily decided to stick around or not.’

‘She gave up her wolf for him,’ Simone said with a shrug. ‘I think she’s fairly serious about him.’

Mera snorted out a laugh. ‘Her wolf was going no matter what she decided, but yeah, you’re right, she was willing to sacrifice her shifter side. I can’t think of a greater loss than that. Has to be love, right?’

Shadow scoffed, and it was clear he’d already had enough talk of the shifter who’d rejected Mera and set off the chain of events that’d led her to Shadow. In a way, they both should be grateful that Torin had been such a selfish shit, otherwise Mera’s future might have looked different, stuck in Torma with that asshole forever. I also had a lot to be grateful for in that regard, and maybe one day I’d track Torin down and thank him for being a spineless sack of organs.

‘We should leave now,’ Shadow said a few minutes later when the girls had finished their stew but were still chatting back and forth. ‘We must prepare to go to the Desert Lands.’

I was already on my feet, ready for this next mission to be over and done with. As the ghosts of my past continued to hang over my head, I felt unsettled and anxious, two emotions I was not okay with existing within my energy.

Mera was slower to get to her feet, and not just because she had to maneuver her stomach out of the booth. It was clear she hated leaving Simone so soon after arriving. ‘It’s always goodbye,’ she said tearfully.

‘Do you want her to come with us?’ Shadow asked, his eyes hooded at the sight of his mate’s cry-face.

Mera’s face screwed up tighter. ‘That’s sooo sweet,’ she sobbed. ‘But I won’t put her in danger. She’s building a life here, and I stan that a hundred and fifty percent.’

‘I have no damn idea what stan means,’ Shadow growled, ‘but I do know that if you don’t stop crying, mate, I’m going to burn this fucking town to the ground.’

This only made Mera sob harder as she choked out, “It’s a combination of being a stalker and fan. Super fan if you will.” She actually started to calm here like she knew she was being ridiculous. “I don’t think I even used it right, but gotta stay current.”

Shadow’s chest rumbled as he shook his head. “Sunshine, you’re eternal. Words like stan,” his face screwed up in mock horror, “will be gone before you blink a damn eye.”

As Mera went on to list a ton more slang that she’d recently come into contact with, I found myself exchanging an amused stare with Simone. ‘Is she always like this?’ Simone asked with a chuckle.

‘Her pregnancy has been… interesting,’ I replied.

This set Simone off, her laughter filling the small diner, which thankfully helped Mera stop crying as she glared at us. ‘You assholes should try growing a Shadow Beast baby. It’s hard.’

Of that I had no doubt.

‘It’s going to be okay,’ Simone said, giving her one last hug. ‘We’ll see each other again soon since I’d better be there when this baby comes. And while I’d love to go to the desert with you”—she shot Mera a fake-annoyed glare—“thanks for making that decision without even checking with me, by the way. But if I learned anything from Lucien, it’s that I can’t really play in your world. Not without getting hurt. In these life and death situations, I’m a liability. And you really don’t need that in your cond—’

‘Pregnancy,’ Mera interrupted with a scowl, but at least she didn’t sound as upset. ‘And you’re never a liability, but I would die if you got hurt… or worse. Just, write to me, okay. We’ll stay in touch.’

‘Right back at you, bestie,’ Simone said softly before releasing a long, drawn-out breath. ‘Please stay safe. Keep yourself and that baby alive.’

‘We’ll be there,’ I reminded her. ‘Shadow and I won’t let anything happen to Mera or the baby.’

Mera looked like she was trying not to smile. ‘The baby and Auntie Angel are still working out their relationship, but rest assured, we both know she loves us.’

The word “love” made me as uncomfortable as it made Shadow, and even though Mera threw it around like confetti at a party, I never once doubted she meant it.

And she wasn’t wrong. Whatever Reece had gotten them into, I would be there to ensure my family did not perish in the Desert Lands.

Never again.