Would You Rather: A Novel

“Are we there yet?”

Claire’s whine rivaled that of any three-year-old, and Mia’s patience was wearing thin. She stopped and turned, waiting for Claire to huff her way to where Mia stood on the wooded trail.

She propped a hand on her hip. “How are you so out of shape?”

“I’m…not,” Claire panted once she was by Mia’s side. She bent over and put her hands on her knees. “The air is…thinner up here.”

“We’re pretty close to our normal altitude.”

“I don’t exercise, okay?” Claire wheezed. “You know this.” She straightened and sucked down a gulp of water. “Whose idea was this?”

“Yours.”

“The hiking part wasn’t!”

“Noah said the lake view is worth it,” Mia said. “We can do this. We both know Noah wouldn’t choose a tough route purely out of concern for me.”

Claire’s eyes softened. “That’s true. He’s been superattentive today. It’s adorable to watch.”

“No more than usual.”

“Wrong. He looks at you different now. Take it from someone who’s had her eye on you two for almost a decade—he’s completely lost over you.”

Her skin prickled in a way that wasn’t altogether unpleasant.

“The ridiculous blush on your cheeks is awfully telling.”

Mia glanced up the path where Noah had stopped to wait for them. Graham was nowhere to be found. Noah wasn’t close enough to hear, but still she lowered her voice.

“What should I do?”

A Cheshire cat grin spread across Claire’s face. “Take advantage of a romantic mountain getaway.”

Mia scrunched her nose. “You and Graham are staying with us in the cabin.”

The only decent place they’d found on such short notice was a two-bedroom, one-bath. Claire said she didn’t mind sharing with Graham for one night, loudly declaring if he tried anything funny she’d kick his ass to the couch.

“So? We’re all adults. We know what happens between married couples. Or what usually happens, anyway.” Claire tucked her water bottle back into her backpack. “Besides, I think Graham could use a little convincing.”

“What? Why?”

Claire shrugged. “The other day at the condo he said something about you two. Nothing big, just that he thought you seemed awkward around each other sometimes. Made him wonder what was going on.”

“You backed us up, right?”

“Yeah, I told him it was just weird for you two to be public with your relationship after keeping it a secret for so long. Still, it couldn’t hurt to…you know. Make things a little clearer, if you know what I mean.” She leaned in and winked. “Might clear things up for more than just Graham.”

Mia pulled her bottom lip between her teeth and once again peeked at Noah, who appeared as if he were about to come back down to see what was going on. He wore a fitted, soft-looking heather-gray shirt that outlined his impressive chest and biceps and left several of his tattoos on display. His hair was messy and his eyes were hidden behind sunglasses, and a huge backpack framed his shoulders. He’d been insistent about Mia not bearing any extra weight and carried everything they both might need on his own back. She was too far away now, but earlier she’d noticed the veins in his forearms, more visible from the heat and exertion. Today, her usually gentle and soft-spoken husband exuded a power and raw masculinity she sometimes forgot about.

“Holy shit, Mia.” Claire’s voice shook her out of her trance. “You look like you want to eat him alive.”

Mia dragged in a ragged breath and took a long drink of her own water before resuming her trek up the trail.

“Yeah,” Claire muttered from behind her. “If I had a prize like that waiting for me, I’d get moving, too.”

Noah had been right. The lake at the head of the trail was worth the hike, with crystal clear water perfectly reflecting the trees and mountains beyond. They took a break on some rocks and passed around a bag of Mia’s homemade granola, chatting and relaxing.

“I swear, Mia. You should open up your own bakery,” Claire said.

Mia tossed another chunk of granola in her mouth. “Nah. I’d love to write a cookbook someday, though.”

Graham got up and walked near the water while the other three remained seated.

“Excited to start school next week?” Noah asked, even though he had to know the answer. She’d been talking about it nonstop.

“I’m so ready,” Mia said.

Claire took the bag from Noah. “What classes are you starting with?”

“Medical Nutrition Therapy, Nutrition and the Life Cycle, and a few food service and management courses.”

“Sounds intense,” Claire said.

Mia shrugged. “I have a lot of time to make up for. No time to waste.”

“You’re gonna do great,” Noah said with confidence. “Top of the class, you’ll see.”

A little while later, Mia asked Graham to take a picture of her and Noah and, with Claire’s words fresh on her mind, she placed herself in front of Noah’s body and pulled his arms around her. He hesitated only briefly before molding his body to her back and hugging her close to rest his chin on her head. She took a few selfies with Claire too, and once Claire stated she’d had enough outside time, they made their way back to the cabin.

While Claire declared a nap to be next on her agenda, Graham took a fishing pole down to the shore of a small lake nearby. A beat-up metal canoe floated in the water, tied to the post of a wooden dock jutting out into the blue-green water.

Noah nodded his head toward the boat. “Wanna check out what’s on the other side?”

His eyes shone with the excitement of even the simplest of adventures, and suddenly Mia was sixteen again, going out on the water with him for the first time. It was in the middle of a lake that day she’d unknowingly started what would become their most cherished ritual. They’d been floating in the middle of the calm waters, the boat gently rocking, and she’d studied the expanse of the lake and looked up at the sky.

“Would you rather be a fish or a bird?” she’d asked, embarrassed immediately at how silly she probably sounded.

Noah hadn’t laughed at her, though. He’d thought on it for a minute, then said, “Fish.”

His answer had surprised her, and she’d glanced back at him. “Why?”

He’d shrugged, dipping the paddle smoothly into the water. “They’re not as visible. People wouldn’t be able to see me unless I wanted them to.”

It was such a Noah answer.

Now, some fourteen years later, she warmed at the memory.

She grinned. “Sure.”

Mia enjoyed the view as he moved them through the water, strong and steady. It had been a long time—too long—since she’d done something like this with him.

“Doing okay up there?” he asked after a few minutes.

“Yes. This is perfect.”

“Thinking about how you’d rather be a bird?”

She twisted around, careful not to jostle the canoe too much. “What?”

His ice-blue gaze met hers. “Bird or fish, right?”

She kept her expression carefully neutral despite the fluttering in her stomach. “I don’t think I ever answered that one.”

“You’d pick bird, though.”

“How do you know?”

“Always moving, flocks to groups, constantly talking? Birds are your people.”

She couldn’t help but laugh, the fondness in his tone erasing any possibility of taking offense to his words.

They returned an hour later, and after dinner, Noah and Graham started a fire in the pit in a clearing near the cabin. Several Adirondack chairs dotted the area, and they spaced themselves out around the fire, enjoying drinks and conversation. As night fell, Noah pulled his chair close to Mia’s.

“Can I see our pictures from today?”

“Sure.” She unlocked her phone and handed it to him, leaning over his arm to watch as he swiped through them. Graham had taken several in the pose with Noah standing behind her, the breathtaking expanse of mountains beyond.

Noah passed the phone back to her with an image still up. “Send that one to me?”

Why were her hands shaking? Did he notice? She quickly rested them against her thighs, moving her thumbs across the screen. “Okay.”

He draped his arm across her shoulders, a happy smile on his face.

“I forgot how much you love it here,” she observed. “In the mountains, I mean.”

She thought about the other night at the restaurant, and how tense and stressed he’d seemed. Now, with his relaxed posture and contented features, he was a completely different person.

His blue eyes met hers, the nearby flames casting dancing shadows across his face. “It’s one of the only places I feel at home.”

“We should come more often,” she blurted. “Together, I mean.”

A sweet smile spread across his face. “Yeah?”

She rubbed her cheek across her shoulder. “I mean, if you want to. I can’t rock climb like you and Graham do, but if you occasionally want a less physical trip—”

He leaned close, his breath tickling the tiny hairs on her neck. “I’ll take you wherever you’ll let me.”

A shiver zipped down her spine at the deep husky tone of his voice.

“Whatcha talking about over there?” Claire called out.

“I was telling Mia I think we should consider getting a dog,” Noah said coolly, putting some space between them.

“You can have Gertrude,” Claire said.

Graham swiped the beer from Claire’s hand.

“Hey, give that back.”

“Not until you apologize.”

“Do you really think I can’t get it back from you?”

“I’d like to see you try.”

Mia whispered out of the corner of her mouth. “Would you rather watch them or watch TV?”

Noah laughed softly. “Them, for sure. I can’t figure out if they hate each other or secretly like each other.”

“Your guess is as good as mine.”

“Our rooms share a wall. Maybe we’ll find out tonight.”

Mia stilled. Claire and Graham were still deep in their argument. “About that…”

Noah regarded her with a slight frown.

“Claire said Graham’s a little suspicious about us.”

His gaze darted across the bonfire and back to her face. “Suspicious how? He hasn’t said anything to me.”

“I guess we’re coming off a little awkward.” She toyed with her phone. “She, um, suggested tonight might be a good opportunity to…you know. Make it sound like…”

“Like I’m getting laid?”

She cocked a brow. “Or like I am.”

“Right. That would be better.”

Mia’s lips twisted into a side smile. “Are you teasing me?”

“Nope.” He crossed one ankle over the opposite knee. “I think it’s a great idea.”

Her eyes widened. “You do?”

His lips twitched. “Sure. Let’s pretend to have sex tonight. It’s the perfect opportunity to prove we’re the real thing.”

“Right.” She smoothed her hands down the armrests, nodding. “Yes. Sure, okay.”

He laughed and pressed a fist to his mouth. “Mia. That was the most awkward thing I’ve ever heard.” He gave her a friendly pat on the back. “I know you’ve got this in you. We can totally do this.”

“Are you giving me a pep talk before we have fake sex?”

“Is it working?”

She studied his face. She hadn’t seen Noah this carefree and playful in a long time, and she’d do anything to not ruin the mood.

She nodded and stood. She held out her hand and with raised brows he took it and stood. She made a show of confidently pulling him across the yard to the cabin and called over her shoulder, “We’re heading to bed. You two have fun out here.”

Noah rushed up behind her and swept her up in his arms, forcing a surprised giggle from her.

Claire let out a whoop and Graham whistled, and Mia knew her face was ten shades of red. She covered her face with her hands, and as soon as they were inside he slowly lowered her to her feet. He held up his palm for a high five, and she smacked her hand against his.

By the time they’d changed clothes, taken turns in the bathroom, and shut themselves into the room they were sharing, Claire and Graham had come inside as well, their muffled voices echoing in the rooms beyond.

Mia eyed the king-size bed and thought of the last time she’d slept beside him.

Hopefully this night would be kinder to her.

To both of them.

“Are we really doing this?” she asked quietly.

“You bet we are,” he said. “You made a show of wanting me out there. It’s cruel to get a man’s hopes up like that.” His smile faded all of a sudden as he realized what he’d said. “I mean, if you want to. Shit, even if we are just messing around, it’s always your choice.” He gripped the back of his neck. “I didn’t—”

“Noah.” She got on the bed, on top of the covers. “I know. With you, I always know that.”

“Good.” He slowly went around to his side and sat.

A strange sense of excitement filled her. She winked at him, wanting the lighthearted Noah from outside to come back. “How are we doing this?”

Noah turned, pausing thoughtfully before he reached up to grip the headboard. He tried to slam it against the wall, but from his position and as close as the bed was to the wall, it didn’t have the desired effect.

“Come on,” Mia teased. “That’s not how a man moves a headboard.”

Cocking a brow, he twisted around and got on his hands and knees, and tried again.

Mia burst out laughing.

“I feel ridiculous.”

“Oh my gosh, you’re like, humping the air,” she said between bursts of laughter. She rolled to the side, clutching her stomach.

Noah shifted onto his knees, gripping his thighs. “A good wife would offer to be embarrassed with me. This usually takes two, you know.”

Gauntlet: thrown.

The air thickened between them, and finally she grinned and lowered herself to her back, waving in the space above her. “Come on, then. I’ll do my part, too.”

His smile slipped a little, as if he hadn’t expected her to agree. “You sure?”

“Sure. We’re clothed, even if they don’t know that.”

He moved one limb at a time, climbing over her body to position himself above her. “Well. Claire probably does.”

With his face hovering above hers and his muscular arms positioned on either side of her head, her pulse doubled. She had no control over her foolish heart, but tried to keep her brain on track and maintain normal breathing. “Let’s plant a seed of doubt in her mind.”

“Competitive tonight, are we?” His spearmint breath brushed across her face.

She shrugged. “She’s been heckling me all day.” She wiggled a little, making a show of settling in. “Ready?”

Something flickered in his eyes, but was gone before she could decipher its meaning. “Yeah.”

He drew back slightly, then thrust his pelvis forward again, arching his back. Under his weight and the force of his movement, the bed obediently followed his movement away from, then straight into the wall. The satisfying thump brought a smile to both their faces.

“There it is,” she murmured.

He grinned—goodness, he was beautiful—and did it again, his eyes focused a little below hers, on her nose or lips, maybe?

She was strangely disappointed by it. But it would probably be too awkward to look him in the eye while he pretended to pound her into oblivion.

Razor-sharp jealousy slammed into her unbidden, at the thought of another woman seeing Noah this way. Holding himself above her, using his athletic, masculine body to bring them both pleasure.

Mia suddenly hated them all. Any woman who had come before her, and all who would come after.

Another thump, and suddenly he dipped his head to speak into her ear, his voice low. “I thought you were gonna help me out. I’m doing all the work here.”

“Right,” she whispered, bringing herself to the moment and the task at hand. She was the one beneath him right now, and she might never be here again.

Live it up, honey.

She took a deep breath and collected herself before letting out a loud, and hopefully convincing, moan. She clamped her eyes shut, doing it twice more as Noah continued his efforts above her. She gripped the sheets, wanting something to hold on to, and willed herself to channel her inner actress. She didn’t dare look at him, for fear embarrassment would overwhelm her.

His breathing became labored, and when a guttural sound escaped his lips, she opened her eyes to find his blue ones staring at her face, his cheeks flushed and his jaw clenched. Something in his eyes caught her off guard and she couldn’t look away.

It suddenly felt as if the game had ended, and they were locked in an intense, intimate moment. Out of their own volition, her hands came up to grip his waist, following his rhythmic motion. His hips lowered slightly, still not touching her there, but the heat of his body and the way his eyes stayed connected with hers as he moved back and forth sent a wave of heat through her.

The thought struck her that they weren’t even naked, yet she felt more exposed in this moment than she ever had. He could see everything if he wanted to. If he knew what to look for.

Suddenly he stopped, his breath coming quickly, and he pressed his chin to his chest, breaking the connection when he closed his eyes.

She kept her hands on him, unwilling to let go.

He moved forward, slowly, and pressed his forehead to hers, his eyes still firmly closed. A heavy, pained sigh escaped him, as if every bit of air in his lungs needed out.

They remained that way for several long moments, then a loud bang came from the other side of the wall.

“That didn’t take long,” Graham called out.

Noah rolled to the side and landed on his back, his forearm across his mouth as he laughed.

Mia quickly recovered. “I’m on top now,” she yelled, the breathlessness in her voice giving weight to their charade.

Noah, still chuckling, gave her a thumbs-up.

A pause, then Graham’s approving, “Nice.”