Unmasked

I get home a little after 10PM. I am not sure I want to think about everything that happened at Plot 15 because if I search deep within me, I am scared I will find that I enjoyed myself more than I should have.

I breathe out deeply. Thando’s car is parked in his spot, Zac’s car is next to his. I deliberately switched off my phone because I didn’t want to talk to anyone but it didn’t cross my mind that maybe Thando would have called Zac.

I get out of the car and walk into the house like I own the world. I don’t plan on being apologetic about anything.

‘Good evening.’ I say to the two gentlemen who are in the living room looking worried.

‘Good evening? That is all you have to say after disappearing for hours with your phone off?’ Zac roars.

I notice that Thando is taken by surprise. But when it comes to Zac, anything is possible.

‘Zac I need you to leave our house.’

‘Excuse me?’

‘You heard me.’

‘If there is someone I should be explaining myself to right now, it’s my husband.’

‘Your husband? I am your brother for crying out loud! I am bone of your bone, flesh of your flesh Zara. When did we start allowing other people to come between us?’

‘Maybe I should leave the two of you alone.’ Thando says sensing the mood

‘Yes.’ Zac says.

‘The only person leaving is you.’ I say looking at him.

‘You are serious about all this?’

‘Zac I need you to stop treating me like I am a child. I appreciate that you had to take up the parental role when our folks died but I am not a child anymore. I am only answerable to my husband, so I would suggest that you get that through your head.’

I see the hurt on his face. Zac has been angry so many times in the past but I don’t remember the last time I actually saw him hurt.

‘Are you sure about this Zara?’

‘Yes.’

He starts to slowly walk over to where I am. I can feel my heart start to beat really fast but then he stops just a feet away from where I am.

‘I hope you don’t make this a habit. You were doing really well.’

I swallow hard. I hate that he can see my relapse this easily. He kisses my forehead, apologies to Thando for crossing boundaries and leaves.

There is silence in the room; hear Zac’s car drive out and neither of us say anything. When it gets so bad I decide to go to the bedroom, I am not about to stay in this room with all this silence.

I am just about to go into the shower when Thando walks into the room. I can’t read his mood.

‘Do you want to tell me where you were?’

‘How was work?’ I ask instead not wanting to answer his question.

‘Work was fine, it has been busy of late.’

‘How can it not be?’ I mumble.

‘What do you mean?’

‘Well isn’t it amazing having to find out from social media that your husband is back on the same case that could end your marriage?’

‘You deactivated your accounts.’

‘Maybe I shouldn’t have.’ I say with irritation.

‘I was going to tell you.’

‘When Thando? When in God’s name were you planning on telling me? Do you know how embarrassing it is to have to find out from other people this kind of information? Do you know how it makes me feel as a wife? As your partner?’

‘Zara I am sorry you found out the way you did but honestly I just wanted to know how exactly to tell you. It’s not like you have been making this marriage any easier.’

I chuckle.

‘So now it’s my fault huh?’

‘Babe I didn’t say that.’

‘Zara I am scared okay. You are making life unbearable of late, living with you feels like I am walking on egg shells. I am not sure what you will respond to negatively, it’s like you are just in this bubble and anything I do will make you explode any minute!’

‘Last time I checked I was pregnant Thando! This is news that came as a shock. I am just trying to adjust and find my balance. Is that too much to ask?’

‘Last time I checked you didn’t even want to have this baby with me.’

‘Are you stupid? Are you insane?’ I ask raising my voice. I have never spoken to him like this.

‘You forgot that my phone has auto record right? And the conversation with your brother the other day was recorded.’

My throat goes dry.

‘You invaded my privacy.’ I say gaining momentum.

‘Privacy?’ He asks laughing. His eyes are teary.

‘Zara I am in love with you and I have this itch to find out if what we have is even real but the better part of me knows that I might not like what I find. I have always wondered why Zac disrespects me and you allow it, why he comes off like I am his enemy but now the pieces are starting to come together. Zara I have played that conversation not once, not twice but more times than I can count and each time it breaks my heart all over again. You and your brother are playing with me and I know it. And I might be in love with you but I am not the type of man that will force you to be with me just because I feel love for you. You can arrange with whatever doctor you deem fit and I will support the abortion. I will tell mum that we miscarried.’ He says and grabs his car keys from the table.

‘I will be out late, don’t wait up for me.’ He announces before walking out

..

Kwenje’s Girl

Winnie

🙇🏾‍♀️