Touching the Heart of Ace

What was he doing?

Wherever I went I could figuratively see him and only him.

The tea and cake I bought from the bakery other day was surprisingly payed beforehand.

The grocery shopping bag had a teddy bear with his insignia, which sure as hell I did not pick up or pay at the counter.

Then there were flowers, lots and lots of flowers and chocolates.

I did not know what I was feeling. At least there was no incidents at the college, so far. Or he had not tried to come in front of me; I am grateful for that.

Well, there was a baby succulent on my desk top in a smiley-face-pot. It was adorable even with his logo.

I could not just throw it away.

Jason was wondering why he was hiding, but so was I. This kind of cat and mouse play was not his style.

Stop assuming that you know this guy, Ace!

I was just, just... what? I did not know anymore. It was good he had not come to meet me.

I had no idea how to handle him in front of me.

He would be angry. And that was putting it mild.

I thought I had time to take care of my unhealthy feelings towards him, but he was early. Of course he was.

I was not ready. 5 months, 19 days and 19 hours was not enough time to get over him.

I was merely existing at this point. Time was so slow, I felt like everything was frozen around me.

At least the dance class was keeping me grounded. I was considering in participating in one of the street dances of our company. It was an awareness programme dealing with feminism, domestic abuse, child abuse and hate crimes. I would be honoured to be a part of it.

Was my dorm always this quiet? It was borderline creepy. I sighed. I missed Liz a lot. She would barge in my room, wear my shorts and shirt and prance around like she owned my place.

I put on some music to take away the heavy silence in the room. It was one of the dance pieces I was going to do in the programme. I swirled my body around remembering the real moves but making no effort to do them. Hell was trying to dislocate all my joints, I was sure.

I hummed around but I was feeling so restless.

There was something.

Was that the open window?

No, something else. I... could not figure what it was!

A brush of perfume passed through my nose but I could not catch it again. Did I imagine it?

I bit my lips.

I was going crazy, wasn??t I? I threaded my fingers into my hair.

Probably nothing.

I got used to the feeling of being followed, so now even when I was at my safe haven, I felt the same.

Stupid Ace!

I frowned as the music stopped.

Get a grip, Ace!

I froze when another music started to play.

Alan Kuznetzov!

I gulped. How?

It was that music.

??Our?? music.

I stared at my hands that was shaking. The Pain was playing and reminding me everything I was trying very hard to forget.

I pushed the stop button with vigour but it did not stop playing. Was it broken?

I hated it! I hated this!

I took the music player and dumped it in the trash can inside the under-sink cabinet.

I could breathe a bit easier. Where was my bedroom?

The memories that surfaced had to go away. I was thankful I took a shower at the company, I wanted a nap. I needed a nap before I do something I...

No.

I could handle it. I was strong.

I cracked my neck and changed to my kimono nightwear, but I noticed a single red rose in the middle of my bed.

Where was he? Always leaving me gifts and flowers, stalking, me but never revealing himself.

??Hello, my beautiful Angel.??

I heard that voice in my head, right?

There was no way he was here, with me, in my bedroom. Of course I heard it in my head.

??Miss me? I missed you. I missed you so much.??

No. NO. NOO.

Please no.

I heard movements behind me. He was here, wasn??t he?

No, he was not here.

??Quite a stunt, you pulled, baby. Had me all worried sick. But, you were quite comfy with that guy you like. Heard that he is your boyfriend now.??

My body visibly shook at the calmness of his voice.

??What are you doing here??? Why was my voice so small? Where did my confidence go?

??I am wondering that myself, Angel. What am I doing here? Do you have any idea why I am here???

He was calm and collected. Casually walking to and fro behind me.

Now that he was this close I could clearly smell his perfume. So, what I felt at the kitchen was real. Of course it was real, no way my brain could imagine such an intoxicating scent. ?? You need to leave.?? He had to leave. He had to leave before... before... nothing.

??Oh, do I? Pray tell, why? Will your boyfriend be back soon? I won??t mind to wait. We could have a little chat.??

Was this how people watching Tsunami felt like?

The once beautiful sea slowly retreating back, as if afraid, slowly getting calm and collected but then it would come back with so much force that it would wreck anything on its way. Robbie had retreated, now he was calm but I could clearly hear the commotions inside.

I was afraid for Tristian.

??Please, leave Robert.??

He laughed. ??Robert.?? He was really laughing like this was the best joke he heard in eons. ??Robert! Jeez. Good one Ace. Let me guess, little boyfriend does not know about me???

His breath was on my ears, every hair on my body standing straight, as if they were showing him respect.

??Are we strangers, Angel??? A bit more he would be kissing the shell of my ear and I stood like a statue.

But he retreated again, not once trying to touch me and I was at lose to what to do. I had never been in the receiving side of this Robbie.

Was he truly a demon?

Tempting, taunting, playing with your mind and soul? Was he waiting for me to shed my own resolve and beg him to.... NO!!!

Remember why you left, Ace.

Remember!

I turned around and regretted it right after. There was no way, I could look at his face, I could not meet his eyes. I was staring at his chest crossed by his hands. His thick veined tanned gorgeous hands. My heart was beating like the prey I was in front of its hunter.

?? You need to leave.?? I tightened my voice to highlight the emergency.

??Why? I thought we had a lot to catch up.??

He took a step to front and I took one back. He chuckled.

Another one.

Another.

Another.

I jumped around him until my back hit the wall beside the desk. He leaned in and in and in and I felt his breath on my cheeks... waiting... waiting...

He walked all the way back to where he was standing before. I took several breaths and the oxygen cooled my lungs. I did not know I had stopped breathing. What was in his hands? A box? Not any box!

That box. The beginners kit I had purchased on the day Tristian broke up with me. I thought I had put in... no under the couch. I had kicked it under the couch.

I was scared. Really really scared.

I bit my tongue to stop from asking him about Tristian. What if he did not know about Tristian? He left with Dante. Asking Robbie about him would be stupid, but I was scared.

The box rotating on the tip of his forefinger. He was toying with it. He was toying with me.

??Robert, I am serious. Leave.??

??Aww, I have been waiting for you, for some time. Shouldn??t I make my time, worth of something. I told you, I am ready to wait for your boyfriend to come back. You know, I used to be very patient, until you, of course. But I do not mind, after all I...??

??STOP IT. STOP AND LEAVE.?? Did I shout?

??Tsk...tsk...tsk... There is my kitten with his adorable temper. Did you stray, Kitty???

Humiliation, anger, hurt, jealousy... I could not focus on one emotion.

If anyone strayed that was not me!

It was him!

It was fucking Robert fucking Brantley!

??None of your fucking business. Leave before he gets home.?? I did not know why I added that bit.

There was no one to come to my home. I was alone. Unlike him with his perfect wife, with his perfect baby, with his fucking perfect life.

I could get a boyfriend and make him stay. I did not want him to know that I was miserable without him.

No.

No, I was not miserable without him.

I stared at the tip of his nose. ??Leave. My boyfriend would not like to see you in our bedroom. So, leave, Robert.??

??Good. No man should see his boyfriend with another man in their bedroom.?? He casually added, leaned back on my desk and opened the box slowly checking the condoms and lubes.

He snorted and threw half of it on the floor, finding them amusing. He sniffed each of the mini lube packets, making faces, throwing some on the floor and other he approved, on the bed.

?? You know my size, babe. Half of it would not fit half of me.?? He winked. ??But, don??t you worry.?? He opened his jacket and pulled out several of squares and threw them on the bed. ??I got it covered.??

I gulped down the panic.

Was he...?

He was, wasn??t he?

He was planning to...

No!

I was shaking.

No, no... no.

He...

I...

We...

No.

??Robbie, please... please don??t.?? I begged. ??Please don??t.?? My voice was broken but I couldn??t find it in me to care. ??Robbie... please. Robbie...??

His eyes flashed as I met his steel greys with my blue ones.

This was not anger. This was rage. This was Robert and he was a fucking Tsunami.

??Missed you calling my name, Angel.??

??Please, Robbie, I... please don??t.?? There was no way I could come out of this if he wrecked me once more. I was barely hanging as it was.

He smiled, with all his teeth. That was no smile, that was demonic.

??Angel???

??Yes, Robbie???

??Do you think your boyfriend will be here soon???

??Ye...yes. He will be.?? Where was he going with this?

??Good. Let us start, shall we? Need to give him a good ??welcome home?? present.??☐☐☐☐☐☐☐☐☐☐☐☐