Those Three Little Words

Five weeks later…

“This is fake, right?” Blakely asks as she holds a positive pregnancy test in her hand. “Like you bought this at some crazy souvenir shop, and you’re trying to be funny?”

“Why on earth would I ever think joking about being pregnant is funny?” I say, pacing the length of my living room. “Jesus Christ, not only is that wrong on so many levels, especially for those who struggle with infertility, but this is a fucking serious thing.” I grip my forehead and try to calm my racing heart. It’s been five weeks since I spent the night with Eli. Five weeks. And now . . .

“Wait . . . so this is real? This is a real pregnancy test, and you’re pregnant?”

I pause, turn toward my friend, and nod.

“No.” She shakes her head. “No fucking way.” She points at my stomach. “There is a baby in there, right now? It’s not just the two of us in your apartment, but the three of us.”

I bite my bottom lip as tears start to form in my eyes. “Yes, there are three humans in this room right now.”

“Holy . . . shit.” Blakely collapses on my couch. “Who the hell is the father?” The minute the question falls past her lips, she shoots up to her feet again, eyes wide. “Jesus Christ, is it Hornsby?”

You know those tears that were welling up? Yeah, they’re now cascading down my cheeks in droves as I nod.

“Oh my God, are you sure?”

“He’s the only guy I’ve had sex with in the past year. So yeah, I’m pretty sure.” I wave my hand in front of my face as I start to hyperventilate. “What am I going to do? I’m freaking pregnant.”

“With Hornsby’s baby!” Blakely begins pacing. “You know, Pacey is going to murder him. Absolutely destroy him into nothing. Like I hope Hornsby had fun playing hockey because his life is about to end.”

“What? No.” I shake my head. “Pacey is not going to find out about this.”

Blakely pauses. “Oh.” Her shoulders straighten as a thought crosses her mind. “Well, I mean, that’s your choice. It’s your body.”

“What?” I ask. “No, I’m not . . . I’m not going to do that. I don’t think I could.”

Blakely looks confused as ever. “Then, uh, how do you expect Pacey not to find out?”

“I thought about that while you were driving over here. And the only thing I could come up with is that I start eating a lot around him. So much food that he possibly grows concerned. Whenever he’s around, there’s a burger in my mouth or ice cream, even an entire pizza. So when I start gaining weight, he’ll just think it’s because of this new eating habit I have.”

Blakely taps her chin and nods. “Novel idea, absolutely brilliant.” She holds her finger up. “One problem, though. After nine months of eating yourself into oblivion, you’re going to have a baby. Dare I ask how you plan on explaining that?”

“Uh . . . random stranger dropped the baby off at my apartment door because she thought the flower wreath I hang year round is inviting, so they thought I’d do a good job raising a baby?”

She takes a deep breath. “I understand that you’re pregnant, and that does weird things to your body and mind, but that suggestion is delusional. Pacey had a head injury, but it didn’t knock the common sense out of him.”

“Are you sure?” I wince.

“Positive,” Blakely declares as we both go back to pacing my apartment. “Ooo.” She stops. “Why don’t we bring in Winnie? She could possibly help figure out a way to tell Pacey. She seems smart and has a good hold on your brother. She could be very helpful.”

“True, but if I bring her in, I’d definitely have to tell Pacey because I wouldn’t want her to have to keep a secret like that from him.”

Blakely levels with me. “News flash, Penny. You’re going to have to tell him no matter what. You realize that, right?”

“But do I?” I ask. “I mean, let’s really give this some good thought. I could totally pull off the eating thing. Maybe slip in that I started a new foodie TikTok account. That’s believable. And then when it comes to the baby, well, I obviously wouldn’t bring it into work, so he would never see the child then, and it’s not like he comes over to my place a lot. If he does, I’ll just give you the baby. You know, the more I think about this, the more I realize that we can truly pull this off.”

“Hold on a second.” Blakely poses her hand to stop me. “You’re my best friend, and I love you dearly, and you know that no matter what happens, I’ll always be there for you, but”—she taps her crotch—“it’s all vagina down here, no penis. And last I remember, I wasn’t the one who got you pregnant. So when you say we, you can’t possibly be including me in on that we.”

“Uh, yeah,” I say as if she’s lost her mind. “This, you and me.” I motion between us. “This is a package deal. What I go through, you go through. You accepted those terms when you decided to be my best friend.”

“I don’t remember signing any contract.”

I prop my hands on my hips in irritation. “It’s a silent contract. Best friends are BOGOs. Buy one, get one. That’s us. So my pregnancy is your pregnancy.”

“Yeah, you keep saying that, and every time, it makes me want to take a step farther and farther away from you.” She pushes her hair behind her ear. “I’m too young to be thinking about babies and all of that. Perry and I are still just having fun.”

“Oh, my God, and you think I wanted this?”

She shrugs. “I guess . . . you play, you pay.”

“Oh, my God.” I pick a pillow up from my couch and throw it at her, pegging her in the leg and causing her to yelp. “I can’t believe you just said that. That’s something a disgruntled grandparent would say, not my best friend.”

“Well, I don’t know what you want me to do.” She stretches her arms out to the side. “I’m trying to be helpful here, but your need to hide this pregnancy is absolutely ridiculous and will never work. You need to realize that. Unless you plan on terminating the pregnancy, which I know you don’t want to do, hiding this child will not work. Pacey will find out, and think about his reaction if you don’t tell him. The fury in that man’s eyes will split you in two. And is that what you want, Penny? To be split in two?”

“Might make it easier. Responsible Penny can take care of the baby and hide while working Penny can provide for the family without revealing she had a child. Sooo, possibly this could work.”

“You’re acting insane!” Blakely throws her hands up in the air and heads toward the door.

“Where are you going?”

“To dunk my head in some snow.”

I run up to her and stop her. “Please don’t leave. I need you.”

She turns toward me, and I can see the worry in her eyes. It snaps me out of my delirium. “You have to tell him.”

My eyes water as I slowly nod. “I know.”

“And you have to tell Hornsby.”

I shake my head. “No way. I’m not telling him. Pacey will murder him. We’ve already established that. I’ll just say this is some random hookup, and the guy is nowhere to be found.”

“Why on earth would you do that? We don’t get paid that much, Penny. And there are going to be a lot of expenses that come with a baby, so you will need Hornsby’s help. And besides that, he has the right to know.”

“Trust me, he won’t want to know. We both made it quite clear that we didn’t want anything serious. I mean, think about it. He doesn’t ever date; he just hooks up. This is the last thing he wants. This is an anchor weighing down his fun-loving ship.”

“Well, too bad for him,” Blakely says with such strong conviction that I wish I could have her kind of sass at this moment. “I’m so sick of women—for the most part—taking on the brunt of the pregnancy. Sure, some great men out there are truly there for their partners, but in situations like this, it’s more often than not that the woman deals with all the struggles when it should be both parents.” She points her finger at me. “He doesn’t just deserve to know. He needs to know. This is his responsibility too.”

I agree with her. I do think it would be easier if I didn’t have to go through this alone. But I barely know Hornsby, and what I do know about him doesn’t really paint him as a father figure. And once Pacey finds out, I truly think he will kill Hornsby. Then what happens? I don’t have a baby daddy at all.

A wave of nausea hits me all at once, and I reach out to hold my friend.

“Oh God, I have to tell him.”

“You have to tell both of them. And do you know what my suggestion would be?”

“What?” I ask.

“I’d rip off the Band-Aid and tell them at the same time.”

Is she insane? Telling them at the same time seems like a more ridiculous suggestion than hiding the baby.

I’m about to protest when I pause . . . well, would it really be that ridiculous? Ripping the Band-Aid off has always been a tried and true way to conduct truth-telling business. Telling them at the same time might not be too bad. I wouldn’t have to say it twice. They could both just deal with the news together, and who knows, it might be a bonding moment for them. They very well might hug and congratulate each other on the wondrous news.

Ugh. Who am I kidding? We all know that is a far-fetched reaction that will never occur. I need to be prepared for the drawing of blood and fists.

“I’d need a buffer,” I say, my mind actually thinking this is a good idea, despite how they might react. Telling them at the same time is easier on me, and that’s what matters. “Someone who’d be able to protect Hornsby when Pacey unleashes the fear of God.”

“That’s a good idea,” Blakely says as she walks me to the couch, and we both take a seat. “Because what if Pacey attacks Hornsby? You won’t be able to get them apart, especially with a baby on board. So why don’t you invite Taters?”

“Taters? Why him? He’s an instigator. He’ll only make matters worse.”

“True.” Blakely nods in agreement. “Then how about Posey? He’s close with Hornsby. He’s big, a bruiser. He could do some damage if need be.”

“Posey could be a good option,” I answer. “But won’t that be awkward for him?”

“Probably,” Blakely answers. “But I think it’s necessary.”

I worry my lip as I stare out my windows. It’s a bright day, cold but sunny, the complete antithesis of how I feel at this very moment.

Because instead of being happy about bringing a new life into the world, I’m worried. Scared. Nervous. Still slightly in disbelief despite the four different tests I took just to confirm.

“Maybe I should wait until the season is over to tell them. I don’t want to cause a rift. The team has been killing it this season. This will only divide them.”

“By the time the season is over, you’ll be showing, and it will be obvious. Might as well tell them now so they can get it out of their system and focus on the playoffs.”

“Yeah, you’re probably right.”

Blakely loops her arm around my shoulders. “Who knows, maybe they will take it better than you think.”

“I love how hopeful you are, but I think we both know that’s never going to happen.”

She lets out a heavy sigh. “I know. So when are you going to call them in?”

“Monday,” I say. “I have some social media things planned. We don’t have a game, so I’ll have them come to my office and break the news after practice. I’ll make them believe they’re there for some sort of TikTok idea when, in reality, I’m about to change their lives.”

“Hey, yours has already changed, might as well have company. And after, we’ll get lunch, and you’ll tell me every last detail. Because, girlfriend, you lied through your pretty little teeth when you said nothing happened between you and Eli Hornsby five weeks ago. I deserve to know.” She had hounded me, but I’d denied everything. Clearly.

“Something to look forward to.”