The Stars are Dying : (Nytefall: Book 1)

I hadn’t fully exhaled my breath of relief when I slipped into my rooms and froze still against the door. Hektor eased out from the darkness of the washroom.

“Darling,” he said, the tone he used raising the hairs on my arms. “Where have you been?”

No answer would be justifiable when his rule was that I remain in these three interconnected rooms at night.

“The roof terrace,” I answered—the one place out of bounds to his clients. “I needed a moment for air.”

With his shoulder-length red hair tucked behind his ear, he approached with the green eyes of a predator debating whether to strike or give mercy. I noticed the glass of water he carried, and my body reacted with a flush of need at what it meant.

In front of me, his smooth hand reached for my jaw. I suppressed a flinch. When his hold came soft I relaxed, gazing at him with a submission I often despised. I’d done nothing wrong, only stolen a kernel of freedom within the walls of confinement.

“Open for me.”

My lips parted, and his thumb pressed down before the capsule landed on my tongue. Then his mouth came down on mine—a single deep kiss that tasted of spice and alcohol. He pulled back, stroking his knuckles over my cheek while extending the water out to me.

I accepted it eagerly, my throat still dry from my encounter with the stranger just a moment ago. Hektor’s touch, I couldn’t help but let the thought pass, did not awaken anything in me, and I wondered if it was merely that I expected it, or that when he held me he showed his affection the way I’d seen him admire his prized collections.

The capsule eased down my throat like it did every week, though it wouldn’t always stop me from falling ill. Hektor had sought many healers, spared no expense, but even magick wasn’t enough to cure me. They deemed my blood couldn’t sustain me like it should, and that shortage left me weak often without the medication.

His hand snaked around my waist, drawing me tightly to him. Too tight, and I felt the warning. “Don’t leave again without my knowledge, Astraea. We have talked about this.”

I nodded, running my hands up his chest, and he eased off with my caress. “I’m sorry.”

He kissed me again, and I tried to answer to it, but my lips were numb.

“Don’t you have guests to attend to?” I said, pulling back.

The shake of his head sank my stomach. “I’m yours for the night.” Taking my hand, he led me over to the bed. “I will be gone tomorrow, and I will miss you.”

I knew this from the information I’d eavesdropped upon days ago, thrilled his departure would give me one last opportunity to see a friend before she left for the Central City as this year’s Selected. There were very few people who knew of my existence thanks to Hektor’s tight rules, but Cassia Vernhalla I liked to believe would still be my closest friend even if that weren’t true.

Hektor’s fingers brushed the loose strands of my hair behind my ear as he pulled me down to straddle his lap. I had never questioned the effects of his touch until now. How I craved the humming vibrations of the stranger in place of the vacancy when Hektor’s hand ran up my thigh. Before he could discover my dagger, I pushed his chest until he lay and undid the buttons of his jacket with a slow seduction. I knew he loved to watch my ice-blue eyes dedicated to him.

I’d managed to slip my dagger off and conceal it beneath the mattress by the time he positioned himself over me under the silk sheets, and then our skin moved against each other’s. I wanted to feel something. I wanted the electricity I’d experienced with the stranger. Never before had I known what it was like to crave dancing in the rain until I was touched by a night storm. Hektor’s breath blew into my hair as he thrust into me at a steady pace, but I couldn’t stop my mind from drifting elsewhere.

My head turned, and the night watched me as it always did, but this time the thought sparked a new pleasure I couldn’t build with Hektor’s efforts alone. The stars turned to eyes of glittering amber, and though I wanted to cast them away, all I embraced was how they made my slicked skin tingle with heat. I imagined how the tall, powerful form of something so wrong to desire as a vampire—if that was what the stranger was—might feel when waging war between the sheets. Before I knew what I was doing, my head tipped back, my eyes slipped closed, and I could think of nothing else but him.

Reaching down my body, I circled my apex, but it was his hand driving that pleasure, his body against mine, and I didn’t care for the sinful conjuring of someone else inside me.

Hektor enjoyed my sounds, my movements that began to answer him, but it wasn’t enough. His scent still clogged my senses while I longed for the coolness of mint and sandalwood. I didn’t usually take control, but frustration drove my action, and I flipped us until my hands were braced on his chest to keep him down so I could breathe clearly, fantasize about what I wanted. And I came so close.

One last glance at the night beyond the tall glass balcony doors and I unraveled. Every piece of me was wrapped in floating bliss, every nerve trembling, and as my lids clamped shut there was only one face there—a face with golden eyes that gleamed and a mouth that gave a wicked smile at what I’d done.

Hektor followed my climax, but I couldn’t look at him in my shame, slipping off to lie beside him while we both caught our breath.

“You are remarkable,” he praised. “It fills me with pride to know you’ll miss me too, darling.”

I wouldn’t. I never did, and that always struck me with disappointment. He gave me everything, yet I couldn’t give it back no matter how much I tried. When he was gone I could breathe lighter. I could move around the halls without glancing over my shoulder. And my most forbidden secret: I could slip away from this manor and see my one companion, whom he’d known nothing of in the entire four years.

I’d learned Hektor’s protection came at the price of having to harbor so much from him. I didn’t enjoy it, but I feared what would become of me if I succumbed to the suffocation of his rules. For so long I’d fooled myself into believing he meant well, that love could be cruel and twisted but he cared for me nonetheless. But sometimes I wished his love would bind my chest instead of my wrists.

“How long will you be gone?” I asked.

“A few days.”

I should have known he wouldn’t be exact. He wouldn’t give me a time to be right back where he expected me, which meant cutting my leisure time short to be safe. I found humor in the concept of safety in my mind. Maybe there was something wrong with me for enjoying the taste of danger each time I snuck away from the measures Hektor put in place.

“Can I come with you?” I blurted. I didn’t look at him when the sheets moved and his lips pressed to my shoulder.

“Not this time.”

Not any time, I thought. When I asked, the answer always came the same.

I rolled onto my side, tucking my hands under my cheek, and watched the twinkling of midnight until Hektor’s breathing deepened behind me. Though my body felt lonely, I was glad he never held me.

I lay awake for some time, until the music from earlier played quietly in my mind and I slid my lids closed. What eventually pulled me into darkness was the low vibration of a silvery voice I didn’t want to forget.

I drifted in and out of consciousness. A sharp pain in my arm jolted me awake, but my vision was blurred, and I moaned sleepily.

“Shh. Sleep, darling.”

With the hand that smoothed my forehead, I couldn’t fight the gentle caress luring me back to a depthless void.