The Purge

“Time and space—time to be alone, space to move about—these may well become the great scarcities of tomorrow.”

Edwin Way Teale

I want to believe that what happened was just a dream. But then when I look at Bri, I am reminded of the feelings I will always have for her.

But now, it’s just an illusion that’s about to fade away.

The Sentinel Pilots had started to join the evacuees in the room. Their white uniforms reminded me of the walls back in the infirmary. My wound started to throb and it threatened to bleed, or so I only thought. But I managed to heal myself slowly as Halley had taught me.

I looked back at Bri whose eyes stayed with the Sentinel Pilots. It seemed to me she was looking for someone. Please look at me. I pity my mind as it begged. She looked back as if hearing my plea. I needed to control these feelings for her or this will be my destruction. I smiled tightly at her but she just looked away.

I flinched as the pain came surging back to my wound. I had lost my focus.

“Athren,” Bri called out to him. “escort Conleth back to the infirmary.”

“No,” I retorted and she gave me a cunning look.

“I need your strength back.” She said bluntly. “Now that the Sentinel Pilots are here, the Dark Hour couldn’t be far behind.”

“But I’m fine.” I defended. “I just…” I flinched again as the pain strike through like lightning. “I just needed to focus on healing myself.”

Bored or irritated with me, she turned to Halley. “How fast can you heal him?”

Halley opened her mouth only to stutter. “I-I don’t know. B-but I-I can try.”

“Don’t try. Do it.” Bri prompted without even letting Halley finish the end of her sentence. “Put yourself of use.”

I frowned at Bri. “You know, you can say please. It’s a bit nicer that way.”

She just crossed her arms and ignored me. “Do it, Halley.”

Halley swallowed hard as she made her way to me. Tears threatened to fall down her eyes. She knelt in front of me and she held out her small hands. She met my eyes. I reached out to wipe away those unshed tears with the thumbs of my hands.

I smiled down at her. She’s such a cry-baby. “Don’t be such a guppy.” I winked at her and she smiled back. “Let’s help each other, okay?”

“Do it now, Halley.” Bri said, impatiently.

Halley pursed her lips as tension filled her hands. I gave her a nod as she placed her hands on my chest. She squeezed her eyes shut and I felt her push her energy towards my wound. Slowly, I could feel warmth and cold all at once and my wounds closed in. A tiny drop of sweat ran down her forehead. Healing me was exhausting her. So I placed a hand on top of hers and I let my energy flow.

“Okay. That’s enough.” Bri said as she took a step forward. “Are you good to go?”

I opened the front of my shirt and the gauze covering my wound. It was gone. It didn’t even left a scar.

I looked back at her and I saw the relief in her eyes. I turned to Halley and smiled.

“Thank you.”

She backed away. “You’re welcome.”

Athren hooted. “That’s your girl. Atta Halley!”

Halley smiled tightly. Something’s bothering her. Maybe I should ask her later.

“What do we do now?” Sigourney asked.

Bri set out her frustrations with a sigh. “Now we wait.”

The Sentinel Pilots are one of the elite guards of Argos; hand chosen by the Legislators themselves to control colossal size robots to guard the Gates while the Dark Hour is away. They are not Addonexus like us but they’re highly trained by the military. Some watched them with pride in their eyes while some despised them for their lack of responsibility and cocky attitude. Before I figured I was Addonexus, I wanted so badly to be like them. What would it be like to operate a Sentinel? Would it be like flying a jet or a starship out of space? But then, after being separated from my family, I realized that I couldn’t just sit around, get a big amount of salary every month, and just guard the Barriers. Being an Addonexus meant some action. It meant more than just being a hero. It meant that I’d get to revenge humanity. It meant we could take a step forward.

“You are in dangerous grounds, my friend.” Athren leaned in to tell me. Right now, we sat down in a line on the cold metal floor with our shoulders bumping to meet each other. We both sandwiched Halley in the middle. So, whenever we bicker like crazy housewives, she gets crashed.

Bri had separated herself from us again. She sat opposite to us, looking out the window.

“What can I do? I’m suicidal.” I accepted his taunting challenge.

“Love sick you mean.” Athren snorted and I glared at him.

“Why don’t you ask her out?” Halley asked.

My eyes find their way back to Bri. “Maybe not now.”

“Coward.” Athren coughed but I ignored him.

“You risked your life out there for her.” Halley said. “She’d be a fool to say no.”

“He’d be a fool to ask her out.” Athren snapped. I narrowed my eyes at him. “What? We all know she’s allergic to romance.”

Sigourney elbowed his rib cage and he crumpled. “Don’t be silly. No one’s allergic to love.”

I ran a hand through my hair. “I can’t lose her now. Not like this.”

Athren cursed. “He got it bad, folks.”

Yeah I got it bad big time. From a distance, my hands were twitching to get her and hold her in my arms. My lips wondered the taste of her lips. Teenage hormones are traitors.

“Some loves are not meant to be when it’s from a distance.” Athren clicked his tongue.

“But she has the right to know. At least, you’d know if she feels the same way towards you.” Halley said.

“Cut it out you guys. Let Conleth make his own decisions. Besides, it’s his love life.” Sig said after taking Athren’s bottled water.

I gave her an appreciative bow.

“If he shuts up for the rest of his life then nothing’s going to happen.” Halley twitched her lips to the side. She turned to look at Bri. “She’s not too far away, you know. Talk to her.”

My eyebrows creased. “I do talk to her.”

Halley rolled her eyes at me. “I meant it as a present tense, Con.”

Athren stood up, once and for all. He grabbed me by the collar and he flung me right at Bri. She met my eyes just in time I balanced myself to stand up.

She raised her eyebrows at me. I gave a nod at the vacant space beside her.

“May I join you?” I asked awkwardly. My eyes kept darting back to my comrades who were probably making bets if I could ask her out.

She took a deep sigh. “Would it stop you?”

“No,” I smirked as I sat down beside her.

She leaned her head on the glass window. Her eyes were drifting off and I wanted to cuddle her to sleep.

“What do you want, Con?” she asked, tiredness filled her voice.

“Nothing.” I prompted like I was caught shoplifting.

Bri sneered at me. “Don’t waste my time. I’m counting one to ten—”

“I just wanna ask you something.” I said.

She raised an eyebrow at me. “Is it a legitimate question?”

In the state of my trembling knees and backing tongue, I nodded.

“Then feel free to ask.” She waved a lazy hand in front of me.

When I started to stutter, she rolled her eyes, and started to count again. I moved closer and she stopped counting. She raised her fist, an armful of it.

“Try to kiss me and I will break your face.”

“I just wanna ask you out.” I catapulted the question; wishing her fist won’t reach my face.

She lowered her arm and she blinked back at me. Her eyes traveled towards our comrades who immediately pretended to do something of their business.

She raised an eyebrow back at me. “That’s not a legitimate question, soldier.”

My shoulders sagged. “Just answer yes or no, chief.”

Her lips thinned into a line. Gods I hate this. It’s taking up too much room for tension and anxiety.

“No.” she finally said.

I felt a wall blocked me from ever reaching her.

“Why not?” My eyebrows creased. She started to stand and walk away as if I never talked to her. In my daze, I followed her out of the room.

“Why?” I asked her again once we’re finally alone in the hallway.

She turned to me. Her eyes were branded with irritation. “Do I always have to answer why? Conleth, that’s already why.”

I scoffed. “This is ridiculous, Bri.”

She snorted. “Yes, it is.”

My own rage came into surface and I felt my body shake and burn. Was I really leading myself on while the illusion of her feeling the same way was eating me up? She’ll be the end of me.

I felt myself laugh sourly but inside, I was already turning into ashes.

“You’re right. You’re always right. Besides, where would I take you out? We can’t even leave the premises of this goddamn facility.”

“Con, it’s not like that.” She said. I don’t want to look at her and find nothing. Her arm almost came but then she let it slide back, down to her side. “You’re a good friend and I am grateful that you saved my life.”

And here we go with the undying drama of the famous short word, phrase, line or whatever you call it in the English grammar—it’s called “BUT”. It pretty much sound like an asshole. I just want to walk off and be dumb for the next scenario. It’s stupid of me to think she’d actually feel the same way. It’s way too impossible.

“But?” I made a head start for it. “Go ahead, tell me.” Go ahead, kill me.

She sighed as slowly, sadness or pity filled her eyes. She looked down at her feet then back at me. Her expression went gradually back to the Bri that I know.

“I’m seeing someone.”

Out of nowhere and for no good reason, I found myself laughing again. I’m a fucking retard. Bri frowned at me. It was the worse joke and lamest lie I’ve heard from her.

“That can’t be true. You’re lying.”

“I am not lying.”

“Then how is it that I’ve never seen you with him?” I demanded through the hurt that was puncturing my chest. For a brief moment, I wished for my wound to come back on my skin so that I’d retreat and hide in the infirmary. This feeling was worse.

“Is he a ghost or something? Answer me, Bri!”

Her jaw tightened and I realized she was gritting her teeth from the inside of her lips. She took a step forward.

“Bri,”

We both turned to the soldier dressed in white uniform. He had his helmet tucked under his arm. The Argos’ emblem was visible on it.

When I saw him I realized why Bri couldn’t be with me.

When I saw him I realized why she couldn’t be with him all the time.

Because he is a Sentinel Pilot.