Chapter 4
With a shrug of her shoulders, she steps closer, surrounding me and choking me with her perfume. That, mixed with the proximity of her body, makes it difficult for me to breathe or focus on anything but keeping myself from vomiting. “Maybe for now she is, but think of this. Wouldn’t it be more fun to sell her off and get yourself someone with a little more experience? Someone who can handle a good, hard fucking? Remember, I know exactly what you like and how you like it, and that girl isn’t going to deliver. You’ll break her in two by the time you finish with her.”
I swallow hard and meet her cold eyes. “I’m good. Haven’t you heard? I’ve made an art out of taking a girl’s virginity. They wear my cuts on their skin, showing them off, seeking me out to parade them around. So no, I don’t need anyone with more experience. Virgin or not, I fuck them how I want, and they beg me so pretty to do it.” I put enough bite in my tone that I expect her to retaliate in some way, but all she does is smile, blinking at me lazily, like a cat coiling to pounce.
“Darling…” She cups my chin in her warm hand and forces my head back. We are almost the same height with her heels on, but while I’m looking down my nose at her, this is anything but a submissive stance.
With her thumb under my chin and finger anchored behind my ear, she’s firmly in control. “Why did you have to be so damn beautiful?”
I speak slowly since she’s still holding my chin, and it takes effort to get the words out. “You mean, why didn’t your father sell you to marry me instead of Mitchell? Isn’t that what you always wanted?”
She hums. “Maybe…you weren’t much to look at as a child, but after witnessing the man you’ve grown into, I can’t disagree. Your father was old even when I was young. It was a business arrangement and nothing more. There were no feelings between us. He had his dalliances, and so did I.”
I flinch, and she smiles, knowing she’s struck a nerve. “I’ll let you get packed. Make sure you bring your weapons; you’re going to have a hell of a time protecting that little thing once they find out she’s a virgin.”
She flicks her fingers from my face, dismissing me like I’m a crumb beneath her nail, and turns to head for the door, her heels clicking loudly against the hardwood.
“No one is going to find out. They won’t get the opportunity to.”
She shrugs but doesn’t look back. “Maybe I’ll call some old friends, let them know what’s coming their way.”
Of course she would do that. Anything to spite me.
In the hall, she pauses and turns back, throwing me a smirk. “Good luck with that one. Nosy little thing, isn’t she?”
I race to the door and glance down the hall to the stairs, but find it’s empty. Was Elyse really out here listening to us, or is Tanya fucking with me? It’s a fifty-fifty shot at this point.
Heaving a disgusted breath, I face the stack of clothing on the bed. “It’ll suffice. We’ll only be gone a few days.”
Something in the back of my mind warns me to leave Ely here, that taking her will only cause more trouble. I can’t leave her to Tanya’s mercy, though. She’d just end up being used by her to betray me.
No. She is mine, and she’ll stay with me. There is no other solution.
I square my shoulders and shove thoughts of Tanya out of my head. Time to pack my own bag. The housekeeper offered, but I don’t want her to accidentally find the weapons cabinet built into the bottom of my closet. For as long as I’ve been living back in the house, my closet has been off-limits except to put away clothing, which is mostly Elyse’s job, anyway.
Fuck it. It is Elyse’s job; I’ll make her do it.
I turn to march out of the room and crash directly into her small body. I grip her by the arm in an attempt to steady her and notice the old, ratty backpack she’s brought with her. All I can do is roll my eyes and shake my head.
“Do you own anything that isn’t fucking thrift store chic?”
She flinches, and it feels good. I need this. I need to take back the power it feels like Tanya has stripped from my bones. I haul Ely up by her bicep, and she stumbles forward. The clean scent of soft skin and soap bubbles wafts from her. No thick cloying perfumes, nothing choking me. I let myself breathe her in, erasing the memories of Tanya from my mind. When I realize I’ve been holding onto her far longer than necessary, I release her with a small shove. She stumbles backward, and I revel in the anger that flashes in her eyes while I take the armchair by the bed.
“Perfect timing. I need my clothes packed.”
She blinks. “But I thought you were going to pack your own bag.”
“Well, I changed my mind.” I eye her body and the stack of clothes. “That is, unless you would rather resume what we were doing before we were interrupted?” I toy with her, knowing her response will be a shuddering no, and on the off chance she tries to surprise me with a challenge, I ensure the door is closed this time.
“No, of course, not.” Her voice wavers, and she walks over to the closet. The light cuts across the dark hardwood, and I sit in my chair, watching her. What type of person does it make me if I admit that terrorizing Elyse has become my favorite pastime? I mean, since she belongs to me, why the hell not, right? Our verbal sparring matches are what gets me through the day sometimes, but I would never confess that to a soul.
As much as it annoys me most days, I’ve come to respect Elyse’s sunshiny personality and drive. Even with the odds stacked against her daily, she still finds a way to be happy. Like just breathing is enough for her, and I guess I’m a little jealous of that. Or how, no matter what is thrown at her, she can somehow still find the smallest speck of good in the bad.
I can’t seem to take my eyes off her, and it’s definitely hate simmering in my blood right now. My balls ache, and my fists tighten as I stare at her perfect, heart-shaped ass. Months of confinement in this damn house with her are going to my head.
Hate. Not lust.
Remember who she is and what she represents. That reminder transforms desire into disgust.
Yes, let the disgust and anger lead you. Not the desire. Never the desire.
She pulls one of the designer suitcases from the top shelf and opens it, placing it just outside the closet, giving herself ample room to move around. “How many days should I pack for?”
There’s something intimate about this moment…me watching her as she moves around in such proximity to my personal possessions, her fingers touching them… alarm bells blare in my head. “Five days should be sufficient.”
“Five days?” she murmurs. “I didn’t pack for five days.”
I shrug. “It doesn’t matter. Where we’re going, clothes are optional.” I keep my expression blank, even as adrenaline zips through my veins when I see fear filter into her blue eyes. Those same blue eyes beg me to meet her gaze, as if I’ll confirm she’ll be safe with me.
Yes, give your fear to me, Elyse. Give me all of it and let me drown in it because the alternative is so much more frightening.
She has no fucking clue what I would do if another man saw even an inch of her flesh without permission. I’d have to gouge his eyes out and remove his brain so I could take the memory from his mind. In every definition of the word, she is mine.
I’d never let anything happen between us, but she doesn’t have to know that, nor will she ever. Not even when my use for her has ended.
She returns to the closet and, a second later, brings a handful of suits back out. “Evening wear? I presume a tuxedo?” Her eyes dart to the clothing on the bed, and before I can respond with some asshole remark, she mumbles to herself, “Duh, a tuxedo is needed.”
I remain quiet and let her continue packing my belongings. She’s just a maid. An infuriating, stubborn maid. A warm feeling takes root in my chest when she brings out a stack of my socks and underwear. It’s just socks and underwear. Get a grip. But it’s more than that. I know it, and I’m certain she knows it, too. Unlike all the others, I trust her, and it shows when I allow her to touch the most intimate items I own.
Thus bringing us way too close to the surface of something I don’t want to fucking touch. I need a distraction, even if I don’t have time for one. I whip out my phone and hit one of my most recent calls. “Hi.”
I can feel Elyse’s eyes on me, but she doesn’t pause.
“You free right now?”
A sleepy mumble filters through the phone as Lee wakes up enough to answer. “Mm…yeah, I guess. What did you have in mind?”
I put on a wicked smile, making sure Elyse sees it. Not that she would miss it. Her eyes always have a habit of finding me. I think she’s as attuned to me as I am to her. “Oh, I don’t know. You, me, a bottle of whiskey. Maybe we’ll take a dip in the hot tub?”
I have no plans at all to go anywhere with Lee but I sure as hell don’t want Elyse to think I’ll be sitting around here waiting for her. I could call one of the twenty girls I have in my contact list, but I’m not in the mood to deal with the extra shit that comes with making those calls.
Lee is good enough to make Ely think I’m going off to be with someone else.
More alert than before, Lee responds, “Sebastian. I’ll definitely agree if you finally succumb to my wiles, but something tells me this isn’t that.”
I chuckle, low and deep. “No, it’s not that. I’m looking to blow off a little steam before I head out of town on a business trip.”
Out of the corner of my eye, I catch Elyse’s mouth crimped tight in a thin line. Her hands pause as she stops packing. I stand and saunter over to her, still holding the phone to my ear. If making her life miserable was a sport, I’d be the champion.
I glare down at the suitcase and shake my head. “If you do it that way the suits will be wrinkled, and I won’t have anything to wear when we arrive.” With the toe of my leather shoe, I tip the suitcase up and over, spilling the contents onto the floor.
It’s assholery at its finest, but someone has to do it.
Her pert mouth pops open, and her big blue doe eyes glisten with tears. “W-Why did you do that?”
“If you did it right the first time, I wouldn’t have to correct you. Now, do it again.” I lean in close, dragging one long, deep breath of her clean soap scent into my lungs. Fresh. Clean. Perfect. “And this time, do it right. I’ll be back in an hour, maybe two, depending upon my mood. Be ready to leave as soon as I arrive.”
She flinches and stares down at the mess on the floor, but to my surprise she doesn’t cry. Oh no. I can’t have that. Not if I want to keep this wall up between us. For good measure, I kick the suitcase, sending it sliding through the clothes, scattering everything everywhere. The shirts become wrinkled as they slide across the floor. “Make sure those are pressed again, too. If they’re wrinkled, even the slightest bit, I’ll have you re-press and re-pack the entire bag all over again.”
She turns those baby blues to me in an icy glare. The tears I previously spotted fade away to a liquid heat mixed with a good amount of hate, making it difficult for me to distinguish between the two. It doesn’t matter. She’ll never say what she really wants, anyway. I can hear her screaming in her mind, railing at me, cursing me. Yet all she does is glare until she looks back down at the mess.
Whatever remains of a heart I have left splinters away against every confrontation we’ve ever had. All the good inside me died the day I saved her life. She’ll never know that, never understand the significance, but I’ll make certain if she ever remembers the details she knows just who it is she’s standing against.
I walk out of the room, feeling accomplished. Feeling closer to the new me than previously. Tanya has a way of stealing all my strength, but through Elyse, I found a way to gain control again. It’s fucked up in every way, but I need the strength, the willpower and I can get that by taking it from her.
When it comes to Elyse, I already know there is no way I will fall into those pretty doe eyes, or succumb to that soft voice. Nope. Never again. I’ll never let anyone control me again. Not Tanya, not Elyse. No one.
The only person who will ever own me, is me.