Chapter The One 142
Calvin
I've been miserable ever since the day I mentioned taking over Amelia's parents' pack. Why had said it out loud? It had just occurred to me that she is the heir and that the pack shouldn't go to someone else. If I'd been smarter, I'd have paid more attention to Hunter's response, but I hadn't been thinking. I'm not even sure what happened. One moment I was saying that Amelia is the rightful heir to the pack and the next moment she's renouncing me as her Alpha and taking over her pack.
If I'm being honest, I didn't think she'd last a day.
But then, she'd refused to take my calls, refused to answer my texts. I knew she was alive because our mate bond was still intact and I'd felt her struggles, even from the long distance. After a week, I couldn't take it any longer.
I intended to walk into the pack, tell her I was sorry, that we'd figure it out, and I'd take her home. I drove all night, anxious to see her, to be with her, to feel my daughter moving inside her stomach. But instead, I'd arrived, just as they were returning from killing Alaric. My mate, my sweet, gentle mate, had been walking back with armor on, holding Alaric's head in one hand and helping one of her injured warriors with the other. She'd looked so much like a f**ng Amazon returning from battle that I'd felt pride and lust flare inside me, followed very closely by terror that I could have lost her and my daughter, and I would
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have had no f***g clue what happened.
The moment she'd looked up at me, all that had wiped away. The hurt, the distrust, the anger was all right there in her eyes. The anger I expected. The distrust and hurt were painful to see. And if that wasn't enough, when I asked about her not
contacting me, her mate, to help her, she said she didn't need
me.
She didn't need me? Who the f****k is this woman?
I'm furious with Hunter and Dutton. Either one of them could have given me a courtesy call to let me know they were going to war with my mate. But they hadn't and that, more than anything, gives me pause. They hadn't contacted me because they knew that they would win. They knew that in the battle with the three of them, one a pregnant she-wolf, they would win. She was right, she hadn't needed me, not for the battle at least. But when I carried her to the shower, I realized that she's wrong. She does need me.
She's exhausted, the heavy responsibility of being an Alpha weighing on her. She wasn't raised to carry this burden, but she's taken it on completely, even after renouncing me, even while carrying my pup, and the toll of that weight comes crashing down on her when I pull her into my arms, telling her how sorry I
am.
I hold her as closely as our daughter will allow, rubbing her back in the way I know she likes and kissing the top of her head while she cries in the shower. Her stomach seems to have gotten larger in the short time that I've been gone. How could I have missed so much in such a short time?
'Maybe it's not the short-term that you've missed. Maybe you've
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missed how strong our mate was from the very beginning,' Novak, my wolf says, mournfully watching our mate cry. He begins purring at Amelia, soothing her and our daughter.
When she steps back, I feel her pulling herself together.
"You need sleep, Amelia," I say, as she steps back under the water.
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"I'll sleep when the pack is settled. I still have a lot to do."
"Yes, feeding three armies and signing alliance agreements is important. But so is your health and the health of our pup," I insist.
She opens her eyes and looks at me. "If you aren't going to support me, then why are you here?"
"I am supporting you, Amelia. I'm trying to keep you strong and healthy."
"I'm not your Luna any longer, Calvin. I'm an Alpha. I don't have the luxury of taking a nap while others manage the pack. You're an Alpha, you should understand that," she says, her mouth pressing together in the tight lines.
I know that look. It's Amelia at her most stubborn. In the past, I've loved that look, but it's never been directed at me. Now, I find that I don't like being on the receiving end of her stubbornness. "How long?" I ask, gritting my teeth. She looks like she's about to fall over, unconscious. I realize that she can't keep her eyes closed because when she does, she begins swaying. "Until it's done. Until the pack is settled," she says.
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I swallow my frustration and my pride. This pack needs their Alpha, and if Amelia is determined to be as good an Alpha as she is a Luna, then the best thing I can do is support her so that she can finally lay down and get some sleep.
When she gets out of the shower, she dries off and gets dressed, looking every bit the powerful Alpha that I'm quickly learning that she is. She pulls her hair up and dabs some makeup under her eyes, hiding the dark circles.
She looks at me in the mirror. "Just say what's on your mind, Calvin."
"Were you always this strong, Amelia?" I ask her, in awe and also in shock at the completely different woman I see in front of
me.
She stops, looking at me a moment, before diverting her gaze while putting the makeup away.
"I didn't really have a choice. Losing or quitting wasn't an option. I couldn't do that to my parents, and I couldn't do it to myself.”
"You're more like Sophie than you realize," I tell her, knowing that it bothered her that her sister was called the legend.
"No. Sophie made her choices. She's always followed her own path. My choices were always forced upon me, but not anymore. Now I make my own decisions, and I'll decide where my life takes me from here."
"Do you intend for that life to include me?" I ask, terrified of her
answer.
She looks at me in the mirror again before turning to look me in 46.18%
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the eye. "I don't know yet."
One thing I do know, I have until the birth of our daughter before she makes her decision. If she decides to reject me as her mate, she won't do it until she gives birth.
"Have you given any more thought to our daughter's name?" I ask her.
"I have," she says, as she begins walking to the door.
"Care to share?" I growl. I feel like she's pushing me completely out of her life, and I don't like it. I don't like it at all.
She stops, turning to face me. "I thought you didn't care what our daughter's name was going to be. Isn't that what you said? Didn't you basically imply that she wasn't important to you because she's not an heir to your pack?"
I growl. "It's OUR pack and she's MY daughter too. Yes, I care, but I thought you might want to name her. If you don't, I'll be happy..."
"Athena or Hippolyta," she says, practically daring me to argue.
"The Goddess of Wisdom or the Queen of the Amazor.
"Both are powerful women in mythology. My daughter will be a strong, powerful woman. I will make sure of it," she insists, glaring at me. "Of course she will. She's the daughter of two Alphas. A true Alpha."
She nods before turning and walking out. I follow her around like a damn puppy the rest of the day. First, I sit with her while 14:180
she signs alliance agreements with Hunter and Dutton.
"Sophie, would you like to sign as well," Amelia asks her sister. Sophie looks at Hunter who shrugs.
"It's up to you. Your word is as binding as mine," he says.
"Yes, I want to sign," Sophie said, signing the documents.
"I'd like my mates to sign as well," Dutton said, and Amelia told him she'd make a copy that he could have them sign and send back.
"What about me, Amelia? Would you like me to sign these documents as well?" I ask, feeling left out yet again.
"Would you like to sign on the Luna spot?" she asks, her displeasure with me obvious.
I growl at her, but she doesn't back down.
"I didn't think so," she says, dismissing me and turning back to the others.
When she was done there, she checked with Sophie and Beta Caroline on the status of pack members that had followed them from Alaric's pack. Some were injured and needed to go to the hospital. Before heading to the hospital, we'd said goodbye to Hunter, Sophie, and Dutton, and then she'd spent hours talking to all of the warriors who had been injured, finding out about their injuries and when they could be expected to return. She sat with mates and pups who were crying, consoling them, and encouraging warriors who were badly injured and struggling to
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accept their slow healing process.
As the day went on, I was more and more impressed with my mate and by the time she finally called it a day, it was dark outside, and I was exhausted. I have no idea how she kept going so long.
I follow her to her bedroom. "I want to stay with you tonight, Amelia," I say, not having had to ask in a very long time. I don't like being back to this place with my mate. The place we were in after I marked her. "I have no energy for sex, Calvin," she said, standing at her door and not opening it.
"I just want to lay beside you."
She nods and opens the door, letting me into her bedroom. I could muster the energy for sex, but I know that as tired as I am, Amelia must be feeling ten times worse, or more.
I strip off my clothes and wait for her to change into her nightgown. When she crawls into bed, I do as well, pulling her against me. She's stiff in my arms, but very quickly, she relaxes and lays her head on my chest. In less than two minutes, she's sound asleep.
I, however, don't think I'll be able to sleep for a long time. My brain is in overdrive.
"How am I going to fix this?" I quietly ask out loud.
The darkness has no response.
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