The Metatronic Chronicles: A Minor Inconvenience

Dan was looking over some books in the library when his brother found him. He seemed heavily involved so Michael quietly put his own books down and took a seat next to him. After waiting a few fruitless moments for Daniel to notice him, he finally sent a little telepathic jab. “What are you reading?”

Daniel ignored him for a moment, and then glanced up at his brother. “Did you know who Asmodeus is?”

“An angel?” Michael asked. “I don’t know. My memory isn’t that good right now. I’ve lost a lot since Michael and I started integrating.”

“He’s a demon. It says so right here in Adler’s Book of Angels and Demons. He is mentioned in the Bible. This says he killed the seven suitors of a woman named Sarah and was driven out by Raphael the Archangel who told Sarah to put fish livers and hearts on the fire. The smell actually did the job.”

“Fish livers and hearts?” Michael laughed out loud, and then quickly shushed himself. “I’d leave too. But I don’t think this is the same guy. Did you look us up?”

“Um, yeah.” Daniel turned to some impromptu bookmarks he had made from torn notebook paper. “There’s some confusion about me. I’m supposed to be either good or evil. When I’m good, I’m in some kind of choir of principalities, whatever that is, and when I’m evil, I’m the leader of a group of fallen angels.”

“Which tells you right there that this book is a piece of shit,” Michael said. “What does it say about me?”

“You are captain of the angelic hosts, a prince of the angels, and are one of the few angels mentioned in the bible. It also says that--”

“Stop right there, that’s not me,” the angel Michael quickly asserted from within his brother. “I’m just a duty angel like anyone else. I go where I’m told and do what I’m ordered to do. That’s all.”

A commotion in the library attracted their attention and suddenly Alice Fitch was sitting down next to Michael. “Um hi, Michael,” she said, keeping her voice low. “Hi Daniel.”

The two brothers glanced at each other. Something was weird about Alice, weirder than usual. She smelled different than her usual lilac soap--more like an entire flowerbed of rich aromas and behind her glasses her eyes seemed bright with anticipation. Without thinking, Michael leaned close and took a deep whiff of her. “Oh no,” he whispered tensely. “It’s true.”

“What’s true?” Alice asked quickly.

“You’re pregnant!” Michael answered.

Her eyes got wide and she looked around making sure no one was close enough to hear. “Yes! How did you know that?”

Michael ignored the question. “Who’s the father?” He asked.

Again she looked around then her eyes fell directly on him. “It’s you, Michael.”

He heard Daniel groan, then get up to leave the couple alone. “Are you sure?” Michael quickly asked, but he knew the answer.

“Of course I’m sure!” Alice seemed agitated. “What, you think I sleep with everyone?”

“No, of course not.” Michael took a quick look around the library to see who might have overheard. “It’s just that it’s kind of a shock, okay? I didn’t mean anything by it.”

He realized that Alice was staring longingly at him. “Are you all right?”

“I’m fine,” she sighed dreamily. “Are you okay?”

“I’m okay. I had a feeling, that’s all. Can we talk somewhere else? I don’t want the whole school to listen in.” Michael picked up his book bag and helped her to her feet. A few moments later they were sitting, facing each other in the darkened backstage area of the school’s theater.

“So,” Alice said after a few moments of uncomfortable silence. “What do you think?”

“About you being pregnant?” Michael answered after a moment’s thought. “I’m okay with it. I like you. It’s all good.” He fell silent again, thinking over about the little ball of energy Asmodeus had brought with him. Had it made its way into Alice? “So, how about you? What do you think? When is the baby due?”

She seemed nearly bubbly. “I like it,” she smiled. “I feel great—so energized and so sexy. It’s wonderful having your baby growing inside me. I think it may be from that time at the county fair, remember? We met by accident and went behind the grandstand at the tractor pull? So I would guess it’s due sometime in late March.”

The word ‘baby’ had rocked Michael for a moment, almost like taking a hit to the gut. He remembered that moment at the fair—it was ten minutes of hasty lovemaking in a little alcove next to the women’s restroom.

What was going to happen? Who would raise this baby? How would he tell Alice that he didn’t love her and it was all just physical attraction to her big breasts and ample body? Shit, how could he tell any girl in the school that he had screwed that it was just physical attraction to whatever about them that turned him on? But none of them were pregnant and Alice was.

“Um, Alice,” he finally said. “Do you have plans for this baby?”

She smiled dreamily. “Yes, I’m going to love him and take care of him and raise him to be a doctor or a lawyer.”

Then it seemed to dawn on her that maybe he was asking something else and she drew back. “No. I won’t have an abortion!”

“I’m not asking you to!” Michael quickly answered. “I don’t want that either. It’s just that…we’re both so young and a baby seems like something neither of us could handle right now. Have you considered adoption?”

“Adopt my baby away from me?” She nearly cried out. “How could you think of such a thing? Of course not—it’s my baby and I want to keep it!”

“It’s our baby,” he gently corrected her. “And if you want to keep it, that’s fine with me. But if that’s the case, I want to be part of his life. A big part.”

Alice found her smile again. “You mean it?” She asked. “You want to be a part of our baby’s life? Be a dad to it and love it and care for it like me?”

“Oh absolutely,” Michael was feeling cornered now but he had no place else to go. “Did you tell your parents?”

“I didn’t want to tell them before I told you.”

Thank goodness for small miracles, Michael thought. “Before you do, can you give me a chance to talk to my parents?”

Alice gave him a questioning look, but nodded. “Okay, I can wait I guess as long as you do it soon.”

“Great!” He got up and hoisted his book bag over his shoulder. “I have Geography now. Got to go.”

She looked up at him expectantly. Oh lordy, he thought, and bent down to give her a quick kiss. To his surprise, he got a little bit of a shock as the tiny parasitic angelic soul inhabiting his body for the last couple of days plunged into Alice’s. Hiding his reaction, he pulled away. “I’ll call you tonight, okay?”

Smiling, happy and rubbing her lips, Alice nodded. “Okay.” Sighing, she watched him leave, unable to believe that the most beautiful, intelligent boy in school was the father of her baby and wanted to build a relationship. Could life get any more perfect?

“Life sucks!” Michael roared telepathically at his brother. “Alice is pregnant and that little angelic soul Asmodeus brought is now inside her. I’m screwed!”

He slammed his books down on his desk as the bell rang and settled in for his Geography class but his mind was on anything but Geography except how to put as much as possible of it between himself and Alice.

Daniel was in his Economics class, experimenting with his dual personalities. The angel Daniel was begrudgingly listening and taking notes while his human half talked to his brother, ignoring the teacher. After the discussions of the night before, the angel was being a little more forthcoming and Daniel could feel some aspects of him settling in but there was a still a vast chasm between them. “No, Alice was screwed and now you are screwed,” he answered. “So what are you going to do? Is she going to give it up?”

“No she wants to love it and care for it and raise it and… blech!” Michael returned. “And I told her I would help. What was I thinking?”

“You were thinking that she might be raising a little angel and will need all the help she can get, maybe? And that you were being empathetic and feeling like maybe being a dad isn’t a bad thing?”

“I’m seventeen years old!”

“So who screwed her, you or Michael?”

“Obviously it was me but Michael’s cock was controlling me like it always does! What am I going to do?” Michael employed the same method his brother was using and set his angelic self to taking notes and interacting in the class. He just hoped Michael wouldn’t take advantage of the situation and another dozen or so girls wind up pregnant.

“You obviously have to tell dad and mom and probably Asmodeus too. This is what they were talking about. Your baby is Metatron.”

“And will someone please explain to me who Metatron is?” Michael responded, forgetting that his brother had just done some reading.

“Metatron is one of the names given to the scribe of the Creator.” Daniel answered.

“He’s a secretary?” Michael interjected. “Great. Just great.”

“I don’t think so. That’s just one of the definitions but listening to Asmodeus I think one of the other ones is closer. He’s God.”

“What?” Michael sat up straight, sending his books everywhere and causing Michael to disappear into the background again. With a quick apology to the class, he gathered up his books and tried to maintain control as Michael cautiously came back and resumed his task. “You’re not serious.”

“Well not exactly God himself but more like a persona of God’s, a sort of alias. He was supposedly once the prophet Enoch but another book I read refutes that and says that Metatron is as close to God as there is and a true angel, probably the oldest of all the angels. He’s the most powerful, most cantankerous, most dangerous creature there is. He is also the ruler of all the angelic hosts, our ancestral home in heaven and governs all activity in hell, earth, the universe and everything beyond that.”

Michael felt the color drain from his face. “And this is what Alice is going to have?”

“If Asmodeus wasn’t lying, afraid so, bro. Your baby son is going to be one hellatious son of a bitch!”

“And I truly am screwed!” Michael turned inward to his angelic self and disappeared, leaving the angel sitting alone in the chair, still in the teenager’s body.

This caught the angel by surprise. “Uh, Daniel…” he telepathed to Michael’s brother. “He’s left. He’s gone.”

“What?” Daniel didn’t quite recognize Michael’s telepathic voice. “Who is this?”

“It’s Michael. Your brother has gone into me and left me here alone.”

“Oh shit!” Daniel wanted to get up and get out of there but the big angel taking notes for him was anchoring him down. “Daniel! Let me go! I have to find my brother!”

In his mind’s eye he could see Daniel turn toward him. “Am I done taking notes for you then?” he growled.

“Yes! Come on we have to go!” Daniel felt the angel melt back inside, letting him stand up suddenly. This drew the class attention and making a quick excuse about having to use the rest room, he exited the room.

“Michael! Don’t do anything! I’ll be right there!” Leaving an angel unattended in a roomful of ripe young high school girls was asking for a big helping of trouble. If in there unattended for more than a minute or so, Michael may decide to cancel the class for the day and give the fifteen or so young women in it another kind of education.

He made it to the classroom in just a second or two, but when he looked in, Michael was sitting quietly in his brother’s body, taking notes.

Waving frantically, Daniel caught his eye. “Where’s my brother?” he telepathed to him.

Michael just shrugged back at him and continued taking notes as the teacher droned on about geographic landmarks in North America.

Daniel looked around for any signs of teachers or hall monitors. Without a pass he would be sent to the principal’s office and possibly detention after school.

“We need to get out of here!” He telepathed again and to his surprise, the next thing he knew he was facing Michael, now in his own angelic body, surrounded by a big pink nothingness again.

“Where the hell is this place?” Daniel spat, looking around.

“It’s home, I told you.” Michael answered. “Your brother is being stubborn. I found him wrapped around my cerebral cortex and he is sulking.”

“Can’t you talk to him?” Daniel asked as he realized that he was naked. “Don’t you guys ever wear clothes?”

“When it suits us,” Michael answered. “No, I can’t talk to him. I’m just an irritant to him right now, an adult who only wants to talk sense to him when he just wants to be a teenager. But he may listen to you.”

“Okay,” Daniel answered then called out “Michael!”

“Not that way. You have to go in,” Michael said.

“Go in where?” Daniel asked blankly.

“Go into my body where he is.” Michael’s expression implied that this was a normal, every day thing to do.

Daniel gave him a wary look and slowly smiled. “Hell no.”

“I’m serious! This is normal. You can do it. Angels inhabit each other’s bodies for various reasons all the time. All you have to do is walk in. My body will draw you to where he is and you can talk to him.”

“Can’t I speak telepathically to him instead? Going inside your body sounds pretty gay to me!”

“It is not gay, it is normal and that is all there is to it!” Michael growled. “I want him away from my cerebral cortex. He’s messing up my bodily functions!”

“Such as?”

Michael’s vibrant blue eyes turned into hard stone. “He’s interfering with sexual function.”

“Oh.” Daniel stifled a grin. “I suppose that’s deliberate then since it’s your dick that got him into trouble.”

Michael suddenly seemed very large and dangerous. “I’m glad it’s providing you with some entertainment but unless this is taken care of soon it could have repercussions.”

“Such as….” Daniel started to say but disturbing images projected into his brain stopped the comment. “Okay, I’ll go in,” he said quickly.

He did as Michael said and simply walked into the big angel. It was shocking how easy it was. Once inside, he was drawn down into the depths instantly and was soon facing his brother, who was sitting next to a huge coil of nerve endings. Michael was holding one in his right hand and every few seconds he squeezed the nerve, causing their host to quiver slightly. It seemed so odd, for despite the strange surroundings of deep blue organs and muscular tissue, he looked like his normal self. “Go away,” he said simply.

“I can’t. Michael’s pissed. Apparently that nerve leads to something he likes,” Daniel answered. “Can you come out so we can talk about this?”

“It leads to the damn thing that got me into this mess,” Michael retorted. “I enjoy causing him pain.”

It occurred to Daniel that the situation of a few days ago was reversed now and it was Michael who inhabited the angel now. Was this what it was like for Daniel, just sitting there amid the body parts waiting his turn? “You can’t stay in here forever and he won’t let me leave unless you come with me. Will you please come? We can work out something, I promise!”

Michael regarded him for a moment, and then finally nodded. “It stinks in here anyway,” he said, rising to his feet. The next moment they were both back in school, each in his class and at his desk. Daniel noted the time—it was three minutes before he had actually left the room. The angel Daniel was back, taking notes and dryly commenting in silence about the subject matter. It was as if he had never left.

The two boys met up after classes ended and began their walk home. Michael was still fuming and worrying about what had transpired that day. Alice had tried to approach him briefly before they left but he found an excuse to put her off and headed out with Daniel. He would talk with her later.

“Okay so let’s lay out the problems with this situation,” Daniel was saying as they walked along. “Number one, you can’t keep it in your pants…”

“We’re past that!” Michael growled.

“Okay, problem number two, Alice is pregnant. Number three, she’s probably carrying an angel and number four, it’s most likely the most powerful angel of all and could kill her if she bears it to term.”

Michael’s face grew pale underneath his tanned skin. “Are you joking? Did Daniel tell you that?”

“No, its just logic. The baby is a big nasty kid and she’s a little fat girl. It stands to reason that she’s not going to make it through the birth, at least not without some help.”

“Mom did!”

“I believe mom had a hysterectomy after we ripped her up twice and dad probably gave her what she needed to survive. What that would be, I don’t know, but she sure can kick our asses for a human.”

“For a human…” Michael echoed. “We’re already talking that way. Them and us--humans and angels.”

Daniel ignored him. “We need mom and dad’s help. They knew this was going to happen too. So did you.”

“But I hoped it wasn’t Alice,” Michael complained. “I like her but I would have preferred someone on the cheerleading squad or a tennis player or anyone athletic! She’s just soft!”

“And she has big tits,” Daniel reminded him.

Michael had to agree on that point, Alice’s round fat tits were superb. “Yeah, okay. So we are dealing with Alice and her tits. What do we do now?”

“We need wiser heads than ours. You have got to go to mom and dad. Yesterday I would have said not to, but today is a different story.”

If anyone would understand, it would be James and Mary. They wouldn’t be happy about it, but at least would listen and try to help. Michael nodded. “I’ll ask when we get home.”

“So then,” Daniel continued. “What about you and Alice?”

“What do you mean? We’re going to ask mom and dad!”

“No I mean your relationship. You have to have answers when you talk to mom especially. What do you see as your future together?”

“I see us as old friends who hardly ever see each other,” Michael answered.

“Wrong! You will be raising a kid together, maybe even more than one. This is a long commitment and she has stars in her eyes for you. Let’s face it, you’re a huge catch and she will not relinquish you to anyone else easily.”

“She doesn’t have me yet!” Michael asserted, shifting his book bag over to his other shoulder. If this went on for much longer, he would hit his brother with it. “Besides, who died and made you Dear Abby? What the hell do you know?”

“I know enough to wear condoms,” Daniel reminded him. “And to ask if they are using birth control. Do you?”

“Women lie,” Michael stated. “And that’s that.” Suddenly Michael disappeared and the giant angel Michael came in his place. With a quick wave, he took off into the sky, leaving Daniel to ponder what was to come that evening. It should be very interesting.