The Indifferent Luna 1 - Austan wolf

I heard the beep, beep, beep sound again and I frowned. How many times am I going to hear this in a month? I remember that I had specifically told them I didn’t want to come to the pack hospital. Don’t they ever listen? Why can’t they just leave me be?

“Why are you doing this?” I heard a voice ask me and my eyes instantly flew open. Luna Misheal.

She smiled at me and moved out of my line of vision to sit on the only sofa in the room while I sat up on my bed. Surprisingly, I was back in the room I had woken up in the day after the Luna crowning ceremony. Why were they constantly putting me in this room? Where they making it mine permanently? Like I was some sick person who needed to stay locked up.

I heard my damaged mind say distastefully as I allowed myself to look around the room. If I was in my normal state of mind, I would have allowed myself to admire the room, the white walls, and ceiling, and the sofa which was not far from me on which Misheal sat. She is no longer a Luna now, so I don’t think I need to keep calling her that.

I had hoped I would be given her title. I had promised myself to love every member of the pack and look out for their best interest, just as Eric had said when he had asked me to stay with him and rule the pack with him. Did he even remember that he once said that to me? Or did he just say what came to his mind in the heat of the moment?

“Assuming self-destructive behavior isn’t going to get you close to Eric, only farther from him.” Misheal said, studying me.

“And why do you think I am trying to get his attention, Misheal?” I asked distastefully and she laughed.

“Did you just call me by my name?”

“Why? Are you still the Luna? Last I checked you gave that title to someone more horrible than yourself!” I spat, but she wasn’t fazed at all. I mean, why would she? She won and I lost.

“You sure must hate me.” She said calmly, ” but if you’re being honest, you would know that I tried my best to prevent this.” she said, signaling to me on the bed with her finger,

“You should have taken my advice when I gave it to you.”

“Then it would have been your son! On this bed. Didn’t the Pack doctor say that shifted wolves can’t survive rejection? I wonder how Eric would have survived it.” I said, feeling anger and hatred for this woman course through my veins like fluid. She looked at me angrily, but I continued ignoring her.

“But you didn’t know that at the time you were giving me the advice, did you? In other words, if I had taken your advice your son would have been dead!” I spat and immediately she reached me with her wolf’s speed and held onto my neck, her claws elongated and digging into the skin of my neck while her eyes were pitch black.

I smiled. I had done what I wanted, I wanted her mad and hurt and crazy just as I have felt in the last weeks and I didn’t care if she killed me for it.

“If you open that mouth of yours and spew rubbish one more time, I will tear your guts out of your neck.”

“I would really love to see how that goes.” I smiled back as I saw her already black eyes darken and I knew I had pulled her strings too much to the breaking point and they had snapped. Eric was her breaking point, the thought of her almost causing his death was her breaking point.

She was going to kill me now just as I wanted. I felt her hand tighten around my neck, squeezing it and cutting off my air supply, but I tried my best to keep the smile plastered on my face.

“What is going on?” I heard the voice of the elderly doctor say, and immediately Misheal released me and I fell back on the bed coughing violently as I took in a large chunk of air into my lungs, surprised at how relieved I felt to be saved. Maybe I wasn’t ready to die?

I watched Misheal leave the room without saying a word, while the doctor walked toward me, placing his hands on my shoulders.

“Are you okay? What did I just witness?”

“If you don’t want to come here and meet my dead body one of these days, send me home.” I deadpanned and he looked at me shocked before looking back to the closed door and I knew that he understood that I wasn’t talking about me killing myself now but someone else killing me.

I knew he would let me go home this time, and wouldn’t be so eager to take me back.

.............................................................................................................................................................................................................

“You have to go and see him. I’m sure he wants to explain why things turned out like this between you two.” Lady Freya said as I pushed my food around on my plate, pretending not to hear her.

It had been two hours since I got discharged from the hospital. The doctor taking my threat, allowed me to come home after making me promise to take all my medication and eat healthily. If not, he would have me brought back and he didn’t care if it brought about my death. He tried to threaten me back but it didn’t faze me. Doctors were addicted to the desire to save their patients after all and, oh, I had made sure to come home by myself.

Maria saw no reason why I should be discharged since I wasn’t feeling better yet, so I left her there angrily and dragged myself back home. On getting home, I met Cecilia and Lady Freya about to leave for the hospital to see me. They claimed Cecilia had a message for me from Eric.

He wanted us to meet at our special place tomorrow morning.

“She’s right, Lady Silveen.” Cecilia said, “Perhaps the Alpha wants to explain to you why he had made the decision to crown someone else.”

“Or maybe he wants to finish what he started by officially rejecting me.” I said.

“Don’t say that Silveen, Eric loves you and you know that.” Lady Freya said with all conviction and I eyed her angrily, wondering why she was spewing rubbish in front of me.

I have been here for a month jumping in and out of the hospital and not once since the crowning ceremony did he try to reach out to me and now he miraculously wants to explain things? On the same day, his mother had come to see me in the hospital and almost strangled me to death? How convenient.

“That’s the problem. He pretends to love me and all of you are falling for it. He’s no different from his mother.” I said, then frowned as I was having second thoughts on that opinion.

“That’s not true. Eric is nothing like aunt Misheal.”

“You’re right, his worse. At least she made her hatred for me obvious from the start. He just led me on and dumped me when he had no more use for me.”

“Silveen!” Lady Freya exclaimed, “you should have a little faith in your mate.”

“He’s not my mate!” I deadpanned.

“He has been sleeping in your room since the crowning ceremony. He has not gone near or touched the Luna and this has made her very agitated. It’s a living hell in the pack house these days, Lady Silveen. If the Alpha didn’t love you, he would have marked the Luna already. I think he loves and misses you. I think he has his reasons for making her Luna instead. Why don’t you just hear him out and then you can decide if your hatred for him is based on assumptions or if it is true.” Cecilia explained and I sighed.

How is it that they had more faith in Eric than I did? But of course, they would. They weren’t the ones who walked in on a ceremony that was supposed to be hers and found out it was being held for another. Maybe it was all staged. I thought as I began to sob again. Lady Freya quickly hugged me.

Maybe they had staged the whole drinking thing so that I wouldn’t make it to my own ceremony, making it seem like my fault. Cecilia is right. I needed to go and meet him, not because I trusted him or because I wanted another chance. But because I wanted to hear him explain why he had hurt me. Why he had promised me the world and then taken the little I had from me. My heart!

“Fine! I would go.” I sniffed and they both broke into a smile as Cecilia came to squeeze my hands.

“But you know where it is right? Your special place?” Cecilia asked and I nodded

“Yes, I do.”