Chapter 9
Xaviers POV
We stared at each other in awkward silence, not knowing what to say to each other. I mean what can you say to someone you were supposed to be mated with but couldn’t stand what they were?
“Listen I’m sure I can figure out how to get back to my room from here” Blaine said, breaking the slight tension that had build up in the room. “There’s really no need for you to escort me or whatever” she muttered.
I watched her as she picked up her few shopping bags she had with her before slowly making her way towards the front door. The limp she had from her injuries yesterday was slightly more prominent than it should have been, it was probably because of all the walking she had done today. I sighed, as Annas words from yesterday flickered through my head again. Keep an open mind. Yes she was a rogue and yes I hated everything rogues stood for but does that really mean I should pass judgment on her purely for what she was?
“Wait” I yelled after her, just as she made it through the front door. I ran out of the kitchen and took the bag from her hand, hoping to lighten her load so that the strain on her ankle lessened. “Just because we don’t see eye to eye about... certain things... doesn’t mean I should leave you to roam around the pack grounds lost. I mean for all we know you could get ambushed on your walk over there for not being part of our pack, after all you do stink of rogue”.
Blaine frowned as we both turned and started walking the short distance to the pack house, “umm thanks... I think?”
I smiled at her slightly before turning to look where I was going. It was silent for a while, neither of us knowing what to say to the other. I had never been in a situation like this before, I was so torn it was driving me mad. On the one hand I had been waiting nearly ten years for my mate, ten years of watching other wolves find their mates and living their happy ever after lives had made me crave mine more and more as the years went on. I was so jealous of them all but now that I finally had her within touching distance I didn’t know how to handle it because she was a rogue.
After what happened to my parents and sister I had promised myself that I would avenge them anyway that I could. I had already killed the rogue that had killed my mother and sister but seeing as I wasn’t with my dad when he died I had no idea who had killed him. At their funeral I had promised my dad that I would kill the rogue that killed him and if that meant hunting down every rogue that I could get my hands on then so be it.
I was a very angry teenager and it took me years to get over my grief and rage and it wasn’t until Jax’s dad threatened to take away my Beta title that I started to calm down. That title was the one thing my dad had wanted me to have. He always spoke about how proud he was of me, knowing that I was going to be the future Beta of his pack and I couldn’t disappoint him by going on a rogue hunt every other day and putting my pack in danger.
That day I stopped outwardly going out and looking for fights, but it didn’t mean that if a rogue crossed our borders I would show it any mercy.
“Are you okay? You look very deep in thought” Blaine suddenly asked from beside me. If I was being honest I completely forgot that she as even there.
I sighed, running a hand through my already messy hair before nodding my head. “Yeah, just thinking about some stuff” I muttered.
“You mean thinking about us” she stated, not needing to phrase it as a question.
“Amongst other things yeah” I sighed, my brain already tired.
“I know what you mean, my wolf is constantly yelling at me to get over myself and just accept you already but I just can’t. I promised myself a long time ago that I was never going to be involved with a pack. Meeting you has kind of put a slight spanner in the works but I’m working on it”.
I frowned, I wonder what her deal is with packs? Whatever it is, it was probably the reason why she was cast out of her last pack. I turned to face her, intent on asking her when we were suddenly interrupted.
“Xavier my man, whats up?”
Both Blaine and I looked to the left of us to find one of my pack members, Jason running up to catch up with us. Great, what did he want?
“Hey Jason, what can I do for you?” I asked, hoping he would just ask his question and leave. Don’t get me wrong, Jason was a great guy but I just wasn’t in the mood for any form of conversation pleasantries right now.
“Nothing really, I heard we had a rogue in the territory and wanted to make sure you are alright, you know considering everything-“.
“Yeah I’m fine Jason thank you” I quickly interrupted him, not wanting him to say anything about my past in front of Blaine. I tried to gesture with my head towards Blaine hoping that he would get the hint that she was, in fact, the very rogue that he was talking about, but he didn’t get the message as he just carried on talking.
“Okay good, I mean we all know how you can get when a rogue gets near us” he joked but I didn’t laugh with him. I don’t know why but I really didn’t want Blaine knowing about my past, about how many rogues I had sought out and killed.
“Oh really?” Blaine asked next to me, seeming very interested in the conversation all of a sudden, “and how is that?”