DRAMA NOVEL ONLINE : Chapter 25
At the sound of a text, I rolled over to my side on the bed and went for my phone on the nightstand. Bella . . .
Bella: You awake?
Me: No.
Bella: Real funny.
Bella: I can’t sleep.
I switched to my back, propped my head up with my good arm, and used voice-to-text to continue what I assumed would be a lengthy conversation with her.
We’d had a few of these late-night talks in the last few months. I’d never thought much of it before. Just two friends chatting about anything and everything until three in the morning. Totally normal. So, I’d thought. Now I knew better. This was part of the “more” that’d been happening between us, I just hadn’t forced myself to accept it until this weekend.
Bella: I’ve tried everything to fall asleep and nothing is working.
Me: I’m sure you haven’t tried everything-everything. Golf channel? A nice horror flick?
Bella: Neither helped. I did try.
Me: Hmmm.
Bella: I think the problem is that, well . . .
Bella: I don’t want to be alone.
And there it was. I’d been expecting that, but it was something she’d never texted me on our previous late-night chats.
Me: I’ll be sure someone gets your bear from the city tomorrow so you don’t have to sleep alone.
Not what I wanted to say, but I was trying to be good. Brothers in the house and all.
Bella: What about tonight, though?
Me: You didn’t need him the weekend you stayed at my place . . . I think you can go one night here.
Bella: I wonder why I didn’t bring him. Maybe I was hoping someone else would cuddle with me instead?
Bella: (Like I’m asking you now.)
Me: You want me to fill in for Rugby? <teddy bear emoji>
Bella: If I promise I’ll behave, will you?
Me: Expand on your definition of “behave,” please. We may not share the same one.
Bella: Hands to myself. No accidental “bumping” of any kind. Sassy mouth in check (since I know that turns you on, and don’t lie and say it doesn’t). Fully clothed (in the PJs I had on in the kitchen, at least). Panties on.
Bella: Don’t ask me to wear a bra, though. That’d be cruel and unusual torture. (It’s not like I have big boobs anyway. I mean, your hand played abracadabra with my breast and made it disappear tonight. Covered the whole thing.)
Was she trying to kill me? I sent her three back-to-back emojis. The same little guy with a cocked brow.
Bella: And that means?
Me: You’re not selling me on the whole behaving thing. Talking about your sassy mouth, panties, and tits. Try again, miss.
I was hard. Great.
Bella: My brothers are down the hall and asleep. I know your head is as off as mine, if not more. I really do plan to be good.
“Sure you will be, sweetheart. Such a good girl.” I trashed the voice message I almost sent. How the hell would I share a bed with her?
Bella: Also, I think you’re safe from ACE. They didn’t try to kill you earlier for being alone with me. So, if we’re just sharing your bed (because mine is lonely and lumpy) and they were to find out, I have to believe you won’t face Judgment Day.
Me: Do your brothers know you refer to them as ACE? <laughing emoji> I like it, though.
Bella: Came up with it on the fly just now. <winking emoji>
Bella: Sooo . . . what do you say? Will you put me out of my misery and sleep with me?
The bubbles on her side seemed to bounce like they were on steroids as I spoke into the phone, this time for a voice memo.
“You have no idea how desperately I want to put us both out of our misery and sleep with you. No. Fucking. Idea.” I stared at the blue arrow, unsure if I should commit to sending her an actual voice message. Against my better judgment, I didn’t X out of it, and let it fly. I also sent a quick follow-up text.
Me: I just proved why you can’t sleep next to me. You know it. I know it. The whole house probably does now, too.
When she kept quiet, I brought my arm from behind my head, sliding it beneath the covers to remove my briefs. My cock was ridiculously stiff already. Like hell would I survive this woman sleeping next to me, but the idea of her alone and sad in her bed was too brutal of an image.
Me: It’s impossible for me to say no to you. You know that, right?
Bella: You did earlier.
Me: Yeah, how long did that “no” last?
The only way I could behave was if she told me to. Because if she gave me the green light, I had zero fight left in me when it came to turning her down.
Me: If you come to my room to sleep (the actual definition of that word), you have to promise not to let me have you tonight. No touching, teasing, kissing. Not with your brothers in the house. Bad enough I already fucked you with my fingers under your parents’ roof. <face palm emoji>
Bella: You’re not going to Hell for what we did earlier, just so you know.
Me: I know. I’m now extremely aware Hell is real and the place I’ve been living in before this weekend.
Bella: That makes my heart hurt. <sad emoji>
Me: No sad eyes. Not allowed. Send me some heart eyes instead. <winking emoji>
Bella: Give me a reason to.
Fucking A, she had me there. Before I could come up with anything to say, she sent another message.
Bella: You have my word for tonight. I’ll behave. If you’re not ready to see if this “thing” between us can be more, especially while under this particular roof, I’ll respect that.
Me: I gave your brother my word this morning. <screwy eyeball emoji> Look how that turned out.
My surrender came in the form of a text a second later.
Me: Just give me five minutes. <Melting emoji>
Bella: A big, tough SEAL being so adorable and honest is just sexy as all hell.
Bella: And why not right now? (Patience isn’t my virtue, and you know that.)
I stroked my cock from root to tip, wishing it was her hand or mouth there instead. Yeah, I was in trouble.
Me: I definitely recall, but I’ve gotta … take care of something … so I’m not quite as tense before you show up. (Increases my chances of surviving alone with you to 5%.)
Bella: I literally just thought the letters LOL in my head. I think I’ve been spending too much time texting instead of speaking. (Side note: thank you for the mental image. Now I’m horny.)
Me: Like you weren’t already before? <devil emoji>
I just couldn’t stop myself anymore. The line in the sand. The steel barrier. The whatever we wanted to call it that’d been between us for years? It was gone. We didn’t skip over it. We buried it six fucking feet deep. But buried things didn’t always stay buried, so . . .
Bella: Are you already touching yourself? <fire emoji>
Me: What do you think?
I continued to fist my cock, thankful for that Advil so I could use my dominant hand without my forearm hurting. I thought back to the bathroom, when she’d spread her knees and boldly showed me her cunt.
Bella: I’m touching myself, too.
“Of course you are. Such a bad girl.” I sent it as a voice message, my words a damn near growl. I pushed the covers back so when I was ready to come, it’d be on my bare chest instead of on the bedding.
She replied with a voice memo. Finally.
I pressed play, and her breathy words had me clenching my jaw. “Make up your mind, sailor. Want me to be your good girl or your bad one?”
I responded immediately, gritting out, “I just want you to be mine.”
I hit send before I realized what I’d said, my abs contracting and my body tensing as I came, then finally relaxed for the first time since the accident.
I closed my eyes, my left hand hanging lazily at my side still clutching the phone. The chime from her message woke up my brain, and I lifted up the phone to read it.
Bella: Does that mean you’ve decided I’m worth the risk?
She was worth it all. Living. Dying. And everything in between. That wasn’t the issue.
Me: I don’t want to hurt you. You get that, right? If it was just my feelings to consider, I’d have made you mine a long time ago.
Bella: Well, maybe almost dying will finally wake you up. Help you see your feelings matter, too. And to understand that taking a chance on us being “more” is much better than living our lives always wondering if we should’ve . . .
Me: I did the “almost dying” thing for a living in the Navy. That never woke me up. But almost losing you this weekend has.
Me: I’m trying, I promise.
Bella: That’s all I want.
Me: Now, are you coming to my bed . . . or what? <winking emoji>