The Alpha's Daydream

Warmth.

Surrounding me is warmth, and something soft like a feather comforter. I feel my body relax, sinking into a feeling of weightlessness and abandon. I don’t move a muscle, just tune into each of my senses.

My skin is warm and caressed gently by something that barely leaves an impression yet washes over me, as if I am floating in an atmosphere so light and comforting. My eyes are closed, but the pale light beyond my lids is soothing and gentle. I listen carefully to the low hum that seems to echo and vibrate through me from every angle, every side. I don’t move or roll over, but I feel the sound throb stronger in a particular direction. I move on in my exploration with my senses, opening my mouth to take a deep breath and taste the air on my tongue, salty and sweet at once. It rushes into my lungs, reviving the parched and dusted cells that caused my lungs to spasm in the forest.

...the forest.

The lunar blood eclipse.

Demons, rogues, Seneca.

The dagger meant for Malachi, slicing through my chest and setting each cell alight with pain like a raging fire.

All these thoughts come rushing into my mind, swamping me with alarm and anguish, my limbs jerking as I try and feel steady ground beneath my feet. I feel like I am floating, floundering and about to drown.

Where am I, and what happened? I pull memories forward in my brain, and the last thing I remember was the intense pain and emptiness as the blade in Seneca’s hands sank deep into my chest. Darkness had swallowed me soon after, a darkness worse even than my most terrifying nightmares.

I had managed to fling myself between Seneca and Malachi before she could turn him into a demon forever.

I whispered I’m sorry to my mate, but I’m not really sorry. I would do it again. I would save him from an eternity of evil even if I had to suffer a thousand deaths.

My life for his, that’s how it’s meant to be with mates. We care about each other so much that we would do nothing less than give our lives for each other.

I’m only sorry I won’t see Malachi become a good and strong Alpha, worthy to lead his pack into a safe, peaceful future.

Tugging my eyes open, eager to banish the black images in my mind, I am greeted with a vivid blue, clearer than any sky I’ve ever lived under. There is no sun that I can see, but light radiates all around me, and I realise this is the perfect warmth that I feel. I am neither too cold nor hot, just perfectly comfortable. My skin tingles where the light makes contact, a low thrum of electricity running through my veins and fortifying my very bones.

I move my head sideways and water splashes over my face. I gasp, lifting my arms to wipe the water from my eyes, and try to keep my head above the gentle waves that I now see rolling towards me. The water I am floating in is crystal clear, and when I dive underneath, I realise I can see for many metres through the turquoise depths.

My feet touch the ground, such soft sand, and I am happy to find I can stand without struggling against the water. It reaches up to my chest, and my white dress billows around me, but it does not tug me down or impede my movement. Everything is so strangely wonderful, every sensation strengthening me, everything so pure.

Turning my face away from the sea that stretches far beyond my sight, the surface of the glassy water sparkling and reflecting the light, I see a beach not too far behind me. The white sand is clean and bright, gently sloping up to tall palms that line the shore. Beyond them is more forest or jungle, I’m not sure which, and beyond that, a mountain range. The emerald, jade, and violet hues are so vivid, almost glowing, and I can’t bear to look for too long. But they don’t hurt my eyes, and I stare in awe as I wade towards the shallows of the sea, the waters swirling around my ankles. Their warmth caresses me like a lover’s fingers.

“Ariella, you made it!”

I turn around quickly at the sound of my name, and my face fills with a wide grin as I see Gabby running down the beach towards me. Behind her is her brother Joshua, both dressed in white. Gabby’s sundress sways gracefully with every step, her hair long and flowing, shining blonde and teased by the breeze that gently blows from off the sea.

I rush into her outstretched arms and hold her tight. Tears prick my eyes at the comfort of her familiar embrace. “What happened? Last I saw you, we were surrounded by demons and I didn’t know if you survived…” my voice catches, and I pull back to look her in the eyes, hastily wiping the stubborn moisture from my own.

She gives me a reassuring smile, her sky-blue eyes twinkling as though filled with many secrets. “Demons are still no match for me and Joshua. I went back to inform him of what was happening as soon as we saw what Seneca was up to. We then sent back up to DoubleEdge and helped as much as we could. But… but not everyone survived the battle. I’m sorry, Ariella,” her smile slips, and she rubs my shoulders comfortingly.

“Battle? I don’t remember that part. I just remember the eclipse reaching totality, and Seneca was about to kill Malachi… then I…” I frown and search for the right words, wondering just how I managed to snap free from the elizenthium cuffs and slip away from the two demons holding me. How did I run to Malachi and throw myself between him and the deadly knife? Either way, I can only assume I am dead now. The thought doesn’t frighten me as much as I might have thought it would.

“You saved him. You saved many lives, actually. Your sacrifice encouraged the other wolves to fight. They defeated many demons and rogues, but as I said, not all made it.”

I nod sadly, realising how many more deaths are now on my head. If only I’d seen through Knight’s deception sooner. If only I’d made Malachi believe me and understand the truth about his betrayal. If only I could have stopped Seneca’s horrible plans instead of falling for her lies…

“There wasn’t anything else you could have done, Ariella,” Gabby tells me softly, her words like a warm spring after a cold winter rain has engulfed me. I meet her eyes and feel the impression she can sense what I’m thinking.

I look at her closely as if for the first time, my eyes tracing over her flawless skin and sparkling eyes, not a fleck of darkness hidden even in the black pupils. Gold flecks her irises, and her smile is almost mischievous. “Who are you? I mean, I saw Luci…She was a...” Again, I’m at a loss for words. The truth about my best friends since childhood may be too much for me to bear.

“She was a demon,” Gabby nods sadly, biting her lip then continuing. “And you know what I am. You even saw us as we truly were the night we first met,” her lips lift in a small smile.

“An angel,” I release a shuddery breath, relief washing through me. “I guess I always knew the truth.” The knowledge actually lightens my spirit, and I take another deep breath. Each one sends energy into my very core. “So what happened to Luci? If she was fighting against us all along, and working with Seneca…”

“Her spirit was dragged back to the Abyss. Her time of wandering the earth and tempting mortal souls was over. The King made that final decision, which wasn’t hard given her intent to ruin you all.”

“The King…?” So many questions now buzz in my mind, but I need to know more about Luci. A part of me is saddened at the loss of my friend, but knowing who she truly was, I wonder if she ever really was a friend to me. “So Luci was on earth all these years? Or the interealm? How come I could always see you both, and Joshua,” I give him a nod as he stands by patiently listening to our exchange, “if you’re spirits? I know I sometimes caught glimpses of the Interealm, but you were always living in the pack.”

“Well, we weren’t exactly living there,” Joshua gives me a knowing smile. “Because we are spirits in service to the King, our home is with Him. And we don’t live in the sense you mean. We exist in whichever realm we need to be in. Most of the time we stayed hidden in the interealm, but often we came to you in your reality when you needed us.”

I nod, telling myself this makes sense. I could always touch them, hug Gabby and feel her warm comforting hand. I have always relied on Joshua to be a true friend and support like an older brother, and the fact that they are both such good and pure creatures doesn’t surprise me.

Angels.

A tingle of excitement shivers through me at the notion.

“And Luci was just one of many demons sent to torment you. We kept as many away as we could, but there were always some you needed to fight yourself. The doubts, the fear, the pain and sadness, even anger at what happened in your life. Those feelings were weaved into your mind by the demons hovering around you. You didn’t always see them…” Gabby explains the darkness that haunted every step of my life.

“But I dreamt about them. I saw enough images in my head, I never knew what was real or imaginary. Now I guess none of it was just fantasy,” I surmise, thinking of all the dark and ugly nightmares that plagued me ever since my parents’ deaths, and especially since meeting Malachi.

“Our King also gave you visions of the future, of what might happen to you and Malachi. They were meant as a warning and it seems you heeded it,” Joshua says, and my heart skips a beat at this revelation. Once it calms, the racing pace slowing down so I can breathe steadily again, I can appreciate the relief it is to know that there was a purpose to what I’ve been through, all the dreams and terrifying images of Malachi that have haunted me for weeks.

“So I’ve served my purpose. I saved him from a life worse than death. I guess I can live with that. Or should I say, die with that. I am dead, right? What happens now?” I look between them both, trying to gauge their reactions of shared smiles.

Gabby’s lips curve up in a grin. “Well, you are dead technically. Your body at least. There’s no way it could have survived that cursed blade through the heart. Luci is such a wretch for giving it to you,” she grimaces, and I wince at the memory of accepting her advice that sounded reasonable at the time. The dagger of Chen did help me defeat a few demons who otherwise would have finished me before I reached Malachi.

“But as for your soul, it will live on forever. The King has much in store for you,” Joshua winks at me.

“About this King you keep talking about,” I begin, my face showing confusion so Gabby squeals and takes my hands excitedly.

“You’re going to meet Him soon. There are just a few more things we need to explain first.”

“Yes. For starters, where am I? What is this place?” I look around me at the pristine coastline we are walking along. The sand is warm underfoot, not scalding like the beaches I’ve been to over the summers. My clothes are now dry, the warm breeze having quickly evaporated all the salt water from my hair and dress. The fabric of the sundress is cool like cotton, yet whispers against my skin like pure silk. Though simple, it is more stunning than the one I bought for Malachi’s birthday celebration. I loop my arm through Gabby’s and give her a questioning look, feeling a stirring in the air around us. I catch a glimpse of the light shimmering above the sea, and wonder just where it is coming from. There is no sun or star to shine in the sky.

“This is the King’s paradise.”

“And the King is....” I prod for clarification again.

“The Creator of everything you’ve ever known. The Giver of life. The King of all kings. He rules the earth and all the universe,” Joshua lifts his chin and says, pride evident in his strong voice. “He is the very essence of truth and purity, justice and goodness.”

I take a deep breath and release it slowly, pieces clicking over in my mind. The warm breeze again caresses my skin, and I lean into it, imagining tinkling laughter chiming like bells in my ears, carried by the soft breeze. “The God who gives us mates.” I remember all the times I prayed for the man I would give all my love to, and thanking the God who had destined for us to be together.

Gabby nods, smiling cheekily as if the idea of mates is so beautiful to her. “You wonder why you love Malachi so much? The King made you to love him. You are perfect for each other because He tied your souls together at conception.” She claps her hands together happily and bites her lip as if needing to stop a wide grin from splitting her face.

I return a tentative smile. “It hasn’t been easy to love him.”

Love him. The words come so easily to me now. I used to contemplate exactly what it was I felt for Malachi, but after throwing myself in front of a deadly knife to save him, I can no longer deny the depths of my feelings.

“Nothing was ever meant to be easy in your life, Ariella. Well, it was. But that all changed a long time ago. The King gives you strength to do what you know is right,” Joshua gives a far away look before turning his bright eyes to me again. “He is very pleased with you, you know.”

I nod, somehow knowing in the depths of my heart that God is smiling on me. I feel it in the warm light on my skin and the gentle touch of the salty breeze. Each element in this astonishing place seems to whisper of His presence.

“So this place is heaven?” I ask, looking around at the indescribable beauty that surrounds us.

“No, not what you call heaven. That is an even more glorious place that He has created to be His followers’ home forever. He will take you there, and everyone else too, when the time is right. This,” Gabby spreads her arms wide as she takes in the grandeur around us, “is only a temporary resting place for the departed souls. They will stay here protected until the King decides it is time to bring you all home.”

“Departed souls? You mean… everyone who has died?”

“Only everyone who has pledged their lives in service to the King. Not everyone goes to heaven,” Joshua says sharply.

“I should hope not,” I agree, thinking of the monsters I’d encountered on earth. They had no goodness in them, no desire to love and serve those around them in honour of our God.

“Look, there are so many! Aren’t they beautiful?” Gabby tugs on my arm, pulling me further down the beach until I see what she is excitedly pointing at.

On the sand before us, and stretching as far down the coastline as I can see, are lights. Small orbs of glowing energy that pulse with radiant, golden beauty. “What are they?”

“Souls our King has created. The ones who chose to belong to his kingdom.”

The departed souls, lost to earth yet awaiting eternal life with their Creator. A shiver of anticipation passes through my skin, stirring something in my heart that I’ve never fully felt before. A mixture of hope and delight, excitement and giddiness.

I stare in wonder at the bright orbs on the sand. I hurry closer, feeling drawn to them. I wander through, at first hesitant to approach too closely. Is this sacred ground that I should not walk on?

Gabby notices my reticence and nods approvingly, urging me forward. My feet whisper softly on the warm sand between the souls, and I marvel at their glittering beauty, at the internal light that seeps from within them. I kneel beside one, peering closer and feeling my heart quicken. There is something familiar about this soul. I feel a tug on my own, a stirring in my chest and a longing that brings tears to my eyes.

“Your mother.” A gentle hand rests on my shoulder, and Gabby kneels beside me.

I am astounded. “She’s here?”

“She had the love of the King in her soul. She believed in His love and goodness, sharing it with all around her.”

Swallowing thickly, I find my voice trembling, “She was an amazing woman, from what I can remember. I miss her so much.” My fingers ache to reach and touch her, but the fear of disturbing her soul keeps me in check.

The glowing orb beside my mother’s pulses with swirling hues of gold, and I turn to it, feeling a similar fire in my chest. This one I recognise after a moment. “My father?”

Gabby smiles.

“I’m so happy they’re here.” Tears grow thicker in my eyes, turning the lights before me into a blurred mass like a solar system of stars. Molten light pooling together to burn brighter as one. Amidst the golden glow, I am drawn to another nestled close to my parents, and my breath catches.

I can sense this girl was only a baby when she passed in to this paradise. The awareness of her innocent and pure soul, untainted by the temptations of the earth, leave only one conclusion as to who she is. “My little sister. I remember waiting for her, longing impatiently for the day she would be born, when she was wrapped protectively in my mother’s body. Her name is Ashira. She was unborn on the day my mom was killed.”

I feel Gabby’s arm slip around my shoulders.

Wiping my eyes with the sleeve of my dress, I no longer feel such a deep ache at having lost my family on that tragic day when I was so young. The knowledge that they are safe, resting in the arms of our Creator, is so comforting. I feel warm inside, so different to the cold loneliness that had enveloped me as a child. All those years of mourning their loss, wishing for what might have been despite the love I had from my adoptive parents, it all fades into insignificance. A feeling so wondrous and complete wraps around me, and it isn’t just from Gabby’s arms.

The air swirls around us and infuses my pores with a calm I haven’t known for a very long time. I close my eyes and inhale the sweet breeze, laced with floral notes, and feel my entire body relax. It is like the cracks and chasms in my heart are knitting back together, the broken pieces not only mending, but forging into something whole and complete. Something new, as if it had never been broken.

“And do you know who this is?” Gabby’s soft voice draws my attention to another soul nearby.

I lean closer and let it speak to my soul. Again, a familiar tug rumbles in my chest and I can’t help the smile that grows on my face. “Lexi’s baby? The one she lost during the battle?”

With a grin, Gabby says happily, “His name is Hudson.”

I nod, somehow already knowing this, though I’ve never heard Lexi or Charles speak about their lost baby. Looking around at the other souls, I wonder aloud, “Why don’t they have bodies? Is the soul not a part of our body?” I turn questioning eyes on my angelic friends once more. They have explained so much to me, but I find I am bubbling with even more questions.

“Our Creator King will give you new bodies when He takes you home. There you will never grow old or frail. That was the plan all along, for you to remain strong and healthy on Earth for many long years, but Lucius had to go and trick the first mortals, ruining all of the King’s wonderful plans.”

Again, I am not sure what Gabby is talking about, but I nod anyway. “I’ve heard Seneca speak of this Lucius you just mentioned. Is he a prince? The King’s son?”

“Heavens, no!” Gabby looks shocked that I would dare mention that.

I frown, beyond puzzled.

“Lucius was our King’s most highly ranked angel, once upon a time. He was beautiful and talented in many arts. Music, mainly. He was also a warrior captain, hunter, and strategist,” Gabby begins, and Joshua continues when her face falls with undisguised sadness.

“The task Lucius reveled in most was leading the musicians in praise for our King, and he excelled at this passion. His music is like no other. But the praise soon went to him, for his talent and beauty outshone many of the other angels and he attracted their admiration and soon demanded it. He began to wonder if he might not have power and rank like the King. He challenged His authority, drawing a third of the angels to his side for he was also a master of lies. They thought with their own power and strength—all given by the King, mind you—that they could overthrow Him and rule in His place. There was a battle between us, and many were destroyed and sent to the Abyss.

“The rest of the rebels, fallen angels or demons as you like to call them, were banished to roam in the underworld and never step foot in the King’s presence again. Save for Lucius, who likes to slither back every now and again and subtly question the King or bargain for favours.”

“So they are free to come and go between realms, but they have taken a liking to tormenting the mortals on earth. As you already know,” Gabby pats my shoulder gently and I lean into her embrace.

“Seneca seemed so sure and proud of her loyalty to Lucius, but there was something else,” I recall the moments I heard her conversing with her master, her prince. “I think she was afraid of him.”

“There is always fear in darkness and wrongdoing. Lucius has become the embodiment of evil, and all those who pledge to him are bound by bondage to his lies.”

I shudder, and purpose to never cross paths with this dangerous fallen angel who has even more power to spin fatal deceit into my mind.

I change the subject. “So why do I have a body now?” Holding up my hand, I turn it over and study it from all angles. It looks exactly like the hand I’ve known all my life. But since I am dead…

“Well, you aren’t exactly dead,” Gabby fights back another grin, and I narrow my eyes on her. She is definitely keeping something from me. “It is highly unusual for mortals to come here before dying and be able to see this place. There have been few exceptions in history,” she counts off her fingers, “Enoch, Moses, Elijah…”

“What on earth are you talking about?” I raise my hands and let them fall in exasperation, her words like riddles to me.

She stifles a giggle and Joshua rolls his eyes.

“Ignore her for now. She has a brain full of history that she would love to share, but now is not the time for that. Like we said before, the King has something more He’d like you to accomplish, Ariella. Your time isn’t up yet. So if you choose, He wants you to agree and serve Him a little while longer before coming here to rest,” Joshua finishes seriously, yet I feel he relishes in delivering this piece of news, as if it is momentous.

“Like what? What else is there that I can do? I saved Malachi, and now he has to pull himself together and lead his pack.”

With a boyish smile that lights his entire face, Joshua inclines his head before raising his eyes, focusing on a spot behind me. “Why don’t you ask Him yourself.”

I turn around, and lift a hand to shield my eyes from the bright light coming closer from across the crystal sea. I squint, making out the form of a man.

He is tall, his shoulders broad, his legs well-muscled and his steps determined. His build is that of a fierce warrior, and amidst the light that seems to radiate from him, I see his clothing is like pure energy. Mostly golden light, yet a sash of purple traverses his broad chest in a manner like royalty. His hands hang loosely by his sides, yet I can tell that in them is precision and power, running from the tips of his fingers up his forearms to his strong biceps.

Strapped by his sides are twin swords, encased in gold scabbards that glitter with gems of endless worth. Taut muscles are corded around his neck and shoulders, and though his face is still obscured by distance and light, I see his hair ruffling in the warm breeze that I now understand he is the source of. The untamed locks, coloured like dark rosewood, sit perfectly tousled yet neat beneath a magnificent crown. The golden diadem that encircles his head and announces his supreme command is set with many translucent and pearlescent jewels, so perfect that I can’t even begin to describe them.

But what really makes me breathless is the rush of power that surges out from him and wraps around my body, knocking the air from my lungs yet at the same time filling me with such raw energy I don’t think I will ever need to breathe again.

He is my Creator.

He is the One who breathed life into me and destined every moment of my existence.

He is the presence I have always felt beside me even when I doubted anyone could ever truly love or care for me.

Without any other thought than one of complete surrender, I fall to my knees in the shallow water, and feel his approach with a thunderously beating heart in my chest. Everything within me submits to the One who holds true power.

The King who wove every fibre of my being comes closer until I feel the ground beneath my knees rumble and vibrate with his intense presence. I can do nothing but keep my head bowed, my neck bared in submission as His power washes over me, stronger than the gentle waves that swirl around my bent knees. I dare not even take a breath as I feel Him draw closer still.

“Ariella….”

My name comes from His lips with roaring thunder, so loud it echoes off the shore and water’s surface, resonating in my ears. Yet so gentle and soft I feel it whisper through every cell in my body.

Ariella…

I cannot stop my body from trembling, my lungs gasping for air as the acute awareness of the King’s proximity engulfs me. Even with my eyes closed, I feel Him kneel in front of me, coming down to my level, and when His land rests gently on my shoulder, I become completely undone. His essence ripples through me, such all-encompassing love and approval.

And something stronger, something that reaches to the very core of me and claims me.

I have always been His, for He made me.

But now He is choosing me again, reaching down to my level, to my brokeness, to my shattered and frail body, and He draws me to himself.

I feel his strong arms wrap around me, and I clutch his shirt as tears run unashamedly down my face. I don’t realise how afraid I was of Him rejecting me until I feel such powerful acceptance surge from His being to mine, from His heart to mine.

“My sweet, sweet Daughter. You will always belong to me. No one can ever take you away from me, and I will never turn from you. Do you believe this?”

His voice is like the quaking earth, reckless and unfettered, yet measured and sturdy like a mountainous waterfall. Crashing like a set of tidal waves, while at the same time murmuring tenderly like a subdued spring shower.

I nod, still not daring to look up at the King’s face. But when His warm fingers gently lift my chin, I raise my eyes to a glory so bright I immediately close them. I’ve read that no mortal man has ever looked upon the face of God, and now I no longer wonder why. His face is a brilliance so intense, I feel as though I might burn up from it.

But I know I am completely safe in His arms, and settle for focusing on the blue tassels that tie the neck of his golden tunic together.

“My King, may I ask… what is your name?” I ask, astounded that my voice came out in something above a fragile whisper. I suppose His warm hands that still hold me close are giving me strength beyond what I can imagine.

Those powerful hands slide up my arms affectionately and come to rest on my shoulders, before He speaks in that mystifying voice that will remain in my memory forever, “I have many names. Elohim. Adonai. Yahweh. King of kings, Lord of lords. The first and the last. But you probably know me better as… Father.”

I tremble at the intensity of His authoritative and gentle voice, the rich timbre rushing through me like a wave of love and comfort. I bury my face in His shirt, the warmth of His chest seeping into my skin and embracing my entire body. His arms band around me again and hold me tight, tighter yet more gently than any embrace I have ever known.

“Father,” I whisper, the word sweet and light on my tongue, but also profound and full of meaning where it resonates in my heart. It vibrates within every cell of my body, electrifying the air around us. It draws me closer to Him, my heart thumping recklessly with the strength of the bond it has always known, yet not always recognised.

And for the first time, more so than at any other time or in any other place, I feel I am truly home.