The Alpha's Daydream

“Harlow, go easy on her.”

“Why? Is there a reason she needs going easy on?” Harlow shot the Beta a suggestive smirk.

“No, there’s no reason. Give me all you got,” Ariella blurted out, not wanting anyone to think she was weak or cowardly.

But in reality, her heart had kicked into overdrive while her stomach sank to her toes. Harlow was going to challenge her? A prickly sensation crawled over her skin at the thought of what was about to happen.

With her legs suddenly feeling like cold stiff boards of wood, Ariella got into a sloppy fighting position and clenched her fists. It took all her concentration to focus on her breathing and posture, bracing her legs for the first move by Harlow. It would look pathetic if she went down at the first hit.

But Harlow didn’t attack. First, she stretched her legs. One, then the other. After flexing her arms, she peeled off her tank shirt, revealing a muted grey sports crop and her toned stomach. The smirk on her face made it obvious she knew everyone was watching her. And she basked in the attention.

With a rising heart rate, Ariella kept an eye on Harlow carefully, like a piece of prey knowing it’s about to get eaten. Harlow just circled her, watching her with those bright hazel eyes of hers, some sort of calculation going on behind those glossy irises. Ariella tried to read her expression, but it was confusing. Harlow had been nothing but friendly towards her since they met, but there was something sharp beneath it all, something cool and cunning. Ariella needed to find out what before she could fully trust her.

The others around them stepped back to form a fighting ring, their faces expectant, their voices low as they betted on who would win.

Blocking them all out, Ariella stretched her neck from side to side, never taking her eyes from Harlow’s, then pounced. If she was nothing else but quick, she’d have a chance at this. She might not be strong or have finely honed skills, but she could mimic the moves she’d seen her dad perform a hundred times over while training the ForgedHearts warriors. And one important thing she’d learnt: never show weakness to your opponent.

With the speed of a swift, she flew towards Harlow without having a plan besides the element of surprise.

Harlow ducked easily, and Ariella had to rotate her body to land on her feet instead of her face. Whipping her head around, she saw in time the punch that Harlow sent her way, and managed to block the blow with her forearm, but caught the other one right on the chin. Harlow growled with self-encouragement as Ariella’s head snapped to the side.

Stumbling to the side, Ariella thought quickly and decided to play defence, knowing for sure she’d never win this challenge unless Harlow made a mistake. And by the smug and cocky look on her face, Harlow wasn’t planning on making a mistake. So Ariella would have to tire her out, make her dance and hope that everyone would get sick of the pathetic fight they were putting on.

Only it wasn’t a pathetic fight. While Ariella had been thinking, Harlow had been making her moves, driving the less-experienced girl into a more and more vulnerable state. Ariella’s shins now hurt from falling to her knees countless times. Her forearms ached from blocking blows, and her ribs were shaking with pain everytime Harlow’s fists met with them. The female warrior’s technique was calculated, not rough and wild like most wolves Ariella read about. Harlow was taking her time, making well-placed attacks that Ariella saw coming, but didn’t have the strength or foresight to counteract.

Ariella was going down, and fast.

Her instincts were becoming frenzied, causing her to make blind attacks for the other girl’s throat with snapping teeth, but each time she’d end up being swatted away like a pesky fly, landing in the dirt with as much dignity as a discarded piece of trash.

Still, she fought. A small part of her remembered the warrior blood flowing through her veins, and now also the Alpha venom radiating from his mark on her neck. Pushing herself up from the ground, Ariella wiped grass from the side of her face and let her fingers briefly flutter over the scar. It tingled, and a surge of confidence spiked in her heart. Rushing forward, she tackled Harlow to the ground with a strength she didn’t recognise.

For a moment, she was on top. She was Luna. She was the strongest female that would lead this pack and stand beside her Alpha as his chosen mate.

But the wicked gleam in Harlow’s eyes sent all Ariella’s visions tumbling to rubble. She flung Ariella off her, and when she herself had risen, she bounced on her toes, lips curled in a grin. “So you really thought you could beat me? You’re going to have to try harder to get what you really want.”

Ariella wasn’t sure if she imagined the spark of jealousy in the other girl’s eyes, but it was gone as soon as it flickered into view. And while she was pondering this, it took the other shewolf only one kick to end the fight.

Ariella had been catching her breath, trying to see through Harlow’s smile; then she was stumbling to her knees, her ears ringing, jaw rattling, and her eyes stinging with the pain that radiated across her face.

Dazed, she caught herself before eating the grass, and saw blood dripping from her nose. Wiping it with the back of her hand, she fell to her rear and tried to focus on the blurry figure of Harlow walking over to her.

The crowd around responded with claps and a few cheers, some shaking their heads and others laughing at the easy win for Harlow.

Ariella wished the ground would break apart and let her fall into its wonderful depths of obscurity. She’d known this would happen, but a large part of her still ached with the failure and embarrassment.

“It was just a friendly challenge. No hard feelings, right?” Harlow extended her hand to help Ariella up, but she ignored it and rolled to her own feet.

Using the large collar of her shirt, Ariella wiped the blood from her nose and upper lip. “Sure, no hard feelings. I obviously need to train some more,” she gave a light laugh, trying to ease the situation though her voice was shaky as she caught her breath.

Her face was stinging all over, her eyes were on the verge of spilling a tear from the pain, and her pride… her pride and self esteem were about as tattered as the dead feathers of a fallen bird.

It took me an hour in the shower to calm down and feel respectable enough to venture back out.

I felt utterly miserable at how this afternoon turned out, at how nearly everyone in Malachi’s pack were so eager to see me challenged and fail. They had set me up to fail. No one survives their first challenge without proper training. They could tell I wasn’t a trained warrior like Harlow, but still…

Still they made me fight.

Taking deep breaths and combing out my hair, I put it down to it being an initiation of sorts. Of course, no one would just be accepted into a pack based on their relationship to a member. They had to prove themselves on their own merit. I honestly didn’t know what I could do to be of worth to a pack like this. For the last few weeks I have fooled myself into thinking being the Alpha’s mate would be enough, that I could be a kind-hearted and compassionate Luna that would lead the pack with a gentle hand.

But these wolves don’t want gentle. They want the blood of a fighter.

Staring at my nose in the mirror, I make sure it has stopped bleeding before pulling on a clean shirt of Malachi’s. I don’t know if any bones had broken, but it doesn’t hurt so much now as before. Most of my bruises are quickly healing as well, for which I am thankful.

As I make my way to the kitchen, I smell some roasted meat and vegetable scents and my stomach churns, hoping it isn’t Harlow who has cooked the meal. That would only make my humiliation that much more complete.

I don’t want it to be this way, but it seems like I’m competing with the shewolf on numerous levels, and I don’t have the energy or passion for that.

As I step into the kitchen, my eyes land on Malachi as he leans against the counter, and without a second thought I run to him. I haven’t seen him all day and I ache to be near him. The dark ambience that emits from him both repels and attracts me at once. Throwing my arms around his waist, I bury my face in his neck and hug him tightly. I don’t care if he isn’t comfortable with hugs. I will teach him how to hug. It will be the first thing I do to soften his aloof demeanor.

I smile when I feel his arms curl around me, and I breathe in his scent even as his nose nestles in my hair to do the same.

Roasted chestnuts. Subtle hints of campfire smoke. Earth that is freshly turned.

I memorise every note of his scent.

I sense another wolf in the room, the confident shewolf who has been on my mind all afternoon, and though it sends a pang through me, the annoyance somehow gives me confidence. I look up at my mate, at his black hair that is swept back neatly, at his blue eyes that gaze at me with a mixture of surprise and hesitation, and give him a close-lipped smile as I rise on my toes.

Before I can change my mind, I drag my tongue along his neck, up to his jawline, and to the side of his mouth. The feel of his smooth yet also rough skin is sending spirals of electricity through me. I want more, and I think I just became an addict of this powerful drug, my mate.

I hear a sharp intake of breath, and from the corner of my eye, I see Harlow watching us. I can’t help but smile at the territorial feelings coursing through my veins as I make it clear who belongs to me.

I am declaring this male as mine.

Malachi’s arms tighten around me, and beneath my fingertips on his chest I feel his heart rate speed up. It thumps nearly in time with my own racing heart, so I step back, afraid I’ll overload my sense and blackout if I remain this close for too long.

“How was your day, Malachi?” I ask with a sweet smile, not yet turning to fully acknowledge Harlow. I can feel the weight of her presence enough without needing to see it. It rattles me in ways I wasn’t expecting and don’t know how to handle. Still, I won’t apologise for displaying my claim over Malachi in front of her, though I can hear her agitation rising.

“It was long,” he releases a sigh.

And suddenly I forget my own troubles and focus on his. My eyebrows furrow, “Anything you want to talk about?”

“No, it’s okay. I’d rather forget about it all for a moment and just enjoy dinner… with you,” he gives me a small smile and all of a sudden the sun is shining, daisies are blooming in every muddy patch of my rough day, and birds sing in the branches of my gloomy mind. “I’m sorry for not spending much time with you here today. I just got stuck with problem after problem...” he trails off, his voice strained.

“It’s okay,” I place a hand on his shoulder to show my genuine support. “I understand. Let’s eat, shall we?” I turn to Harlow, and find her scowling but trying not to look affected as she dishes up the plates. “It’s smells absolutely delicious.”

She brightens a bit and hands me what looks like beef lasagne with fried potatoes. Not what I normally eat, but it’s good for now.

“So how was training? Hamilton didn’t push you too hard, did he?” Malachi carries his plate to the table and takes a seat at the head.

A million answers to his loaded question swarm through my mind, and I scramble to choose just one.

Harlow stiffens and her eyes grow wide. I recognise the expression on her face, though it is the one I least expected to see—fear. If I mention the challenge, she would likely get in trouble by her Alpha Malachi. For though it might be commonplace for wolves to challenge each other’s strength and position in the ranks, I don’t think the Alpha male would be so happy that his own mate had been dangerously challenged. On top of that, he’d probably be livid that his mate was then the recipient of such a brutal loss.

And Harlow was the challenger who came out victorious against me.

This could be my chance to pay her out.

Or... she could turn the tables and prove how worthless I am to be Luna.

“No, it was good. I enjoyed the run around the field. Gave me a chance to stretch my legs.” Deliberately leaving out any mention of the challenge, I give Harlow a genuine smile, proving to her and myself that I’m still nice. I don’t want to be the cause of any disharmony in the Pack. I believe we can be friends and see eye to eye if together we choose to do so. I continue when her face shows relief, “I wasn’t very good at the fighting techniques, but Harlow agreed to train me.”

“I—I didn’t— what?” she sputters but closes her lips when she realises what I’ve done. I’ve saved her skin for reasons unknown to either of us. “Sure, yeah, that’s right. After I finish work in the afternoons, we plan to meet at the edge of the woods and go over some simple stuff until she’s ready to train with the others.”

Her words are smooth, and I nod slightly to show I agree. Malachi gives us both a small smile and we continue eating, but suddenly the food tastes like cardboard to me.

I look around and realise neither Luna Seneca nor Beta Knight showed up for dinner. Not knowing the normal routine around here, I presume they’re busy elsewhere. Uncomfortable with silence for too long, I bring up a topic I know will stir the atmosphere. But I’ve already survived so much trouble today, so this will be easy compared.

“How’s the search for the killer going?” I ask casually.

Malachi turns his head sharply to me, his eyes giving nothing away as he stares at me.

I prod, “You know, a few weeks ago you called a meeting to discuss the deaths on your territory, and to try and find the killer.”

Malachi briefly shakes his head to dismiss me. “I know what you’re talking about, Ariella. And like I told you a few weeks ago,” he repeats my words with emphasis and sharp look, “it doesn’t concern you.”

“But if there’s something going on, I want to know,” I push, feeling Harlow’s surprised expression even without looking at her. “If I am going to be your Luna and help lead this pack, don’t things like this concern me? What if it’s not safe to be wandering around? Shouldn’t I be aware—”

“Of course it’s safe. If Malachi says he’s got it under control, then there’s nothing for you to be worried about. Let those in command handle it,” Harlow brushes her hair over one shoulder, as if she is brushing the subject aside. I don’t know why she is acting so calm about this.

“But you’re a warrior. Wouldn’t you be the first to go out there and hunt the killer down? Aren’t you worried about this?” I ask her, the pitch of my voice rising with my exasperation. A heavy sense settles over the room, and I can almost taste the fact that they are keeping something from me.

Harlow shifts side to side in her seat with a carefree attitude, then gives me a warm smile before turning her attention to Malachi, “I trust my Alpha.”

The look that passes between them unsettles something within me, and I clench my fists as my wolf growls lowly inside. I keep myself in check and bite my bottom lip to keep from saying anything out of line. Especially when I feel Malachi’s hand rest on my thigh, and not in a flirtatious way.

“She’s right. Just leave it to me. Unnecessary worry can make you sick,” Malachi’s blue eyes search mine, and I know he is waiting for a response. I get the feeling he honestly cares for me, and doesn’t want me to get hurt over this. So I determine to put him at ease, though my own heart can’t shake the funny feeling of something being off.

“Alright, fine. I’ll forget about it,” I give them the answer they want, and Malachi visibly relaxes.

The rest of dinner passes quietly but quickly. When Malachi gets up to leave, he leans in to place a kiss on the top of my head. The gesture is warming but much too brief, leaving me to yearn for more.

“I have a few things to finish up in my office. Don’t wait up for me,” he murmurs with an apologetic look in his eyes.

“Of course,” I watch him walk out the room, noting the sag of his shoulders and the taut muscles of his neck. I just want to smooth them away and make him feel better, feel relaxed.

“Well, let’s get this place cleaned up,” Harlow snaps me from my thoughts and I give her a nod. Together, we tidy the kitchen and wash the dishes, then she wraps up some leftovers, saying that Hamilton might like them tomorrow.

When we finish, I put on the kettle for a hot drink, always liking to end the day with a non-caffeinated hot chocolate or chai. “So Harlow,” I start slowly, “I appreciate all you do around here, but I’d love to give you a break. If you want to take the morning off tomorrow, I’m happy to prepare breakfast.”

“Oh, but—”

I interrupt in as sweet a voice as I can, which is easy since I always talk to others kindly. “In fact, I’m also used to doing all my washing and cleaning too, and I’m sure there’s other things you’d prefer to spend your time on. And with your skills, you could be better used in training new warriors than being stuck here housekeeping.”

She smiles at my compliment, and slowly nods her head. “Thanks, actually. Yeah, I have some things I’d like to get done early tomorrow. I’ll be seeing you later then,” she meets my eyes with an unreadable expression borne from all we’ve been through today, then leaves me in complete silence. I finally release the breath I didn’t know I was holding all this time.

Making my way up to my room, I ponder everything—the way Harlow is befriending me and testing me, the way Malachi is unwilling to share his problems with me, the way they both look at each other as if I am child and they the parents who know what is really going on. It grates against me; goes against my curious nature. There’s a faint undercurrent of madness around here I can only catch glimpses of.

The walls of Malachi’s bedroom press in, and I can’t breathe. The soft navy quilt beneath me as I sit on the bed is hot and fluffy, and it nearly swallows me. Leaping back to my feet, I cross to the window and open it, sticking my head out and deeply inhale the cool air.

It eases my lungs, the scents of the woody forests and organic earth. A faint scent of chestnuts passes on the breeze, and breaks my reverie. After scanning the dark land before me, I see nothing and tell myself it is just residual traces of Malachi’s scent on the nearby trees. This is his estate afterall.

It only takes me a few minutes to prepare for bed, then I fling the cover back and curl up on the side that displays a fresh pillow. A sappy part of me wants to lie on Malachi’s side, but I squelch the foreign desire and try to fall asleep. My ribs are aching, so I lay on my back. But then the elevation of my nose makes it throb so I tilt my head sideways, away from the bedroom door.

However, I still sense exactly when Malachi enters, some time past midnight. I keep my breathing steady, trying to appear asleep. My ears prick at his soft footfalls, and I keenly track his movements to and from the closet, bathroom, and finally the bed.

I hear the brush of sheets as he pulls them back, then feel the bed slope down behind me as he gets into bed.

The feeling reminds me of when my dad would hold me when I couldn’t sleep, when nightmares would keep me awake.

But it is also completely different with Malachi. His scent, his nearness, this awareness of my mate being so close—is nothing like having my dad comfort me. Even from a distance, sparks dance across my skin and race up my neck.

I swallow, my mouth suddenly dry, and try to keep my heart from thudding heavily so he won’t sense I’m awake. My heart beats like a heavy downpour in my ears, deafening, but I try to focus all my attention on Malachi’s movements. Soon the light flickers out, he sighs heavily, then I listen as his breaths soften.

Only when I’m sure he is asleep do I slowly roll over to face him. My nose nearly brushes against his back. He is turned from me and I see nothing besides his broad shoulders cloaked with the shadows of night.

So, he wants to ignore me.

I don’t know what I expected for our first night together. Maybe to whisper to each other and laugh quietly in the darkness? Maybe hold hands or at least lie my head on his shoulder?

I soon give up trying to fall asleep in this dead stillness. Sliding back the sheet silently, I rise and tiptoe to the window, preparing to do the only thing that makes sense to me right now.

I decide it’s time to go exploring.