That Summer : Chapter 11
At lunch the next day, everyone is sitting on the big screened porch together.
“Papa and Mimi, how did you meet?” Jennifer asks.
“We met at a sorority and fraternity mixer. They weren’t like the keggers of today. They were social events. We dressed up. Drank mixed cocktails. Talked. Very classy stuff,” Mimi says.
“I thought she was quite beautiful,” Papa says, “but one of my fraternity brothers had already called dibs on her.”
“Dibs?” my dad says with a laugh.
“We were trying to be gentlemen. Fortunately for me, they didn’t hit it off, so I made my move.”
“And by move, he means that he spilled his cocktail all over my new dress,” Mimi clarifies.
“Just so I could get her to take it off,” Papa says with a sly grin, earning himself a playful smack in the arm.
“I’m not sure of his intentions, but I’m afraid that I wasn’t wet enough for that.”
Which causes my father to choke and Jennifer and Jadyn to hoot out with laughter.
“That might be a little too much information,” Phillip teases.
Mimi waves her hand in the air in their direction. “You kids with your dirty minds.”
“Then, what happened?” Haley asks. She’s got her elbows on the table and her chin leaning on her folded hands.
“He offered to walk me to the sorority house so that I could change. I told him I could handle that by myself, wiped the alcohol off my dress, and then turned my back on him. We didn’t speak again for nearly three weeks.”
“That’s when I swept her off her feet,” Papa says. “I showed up at her house and formally asked for a date. We went to dinner and dancing, and just three weeks later, my fraternity was serenading her because I was giving her my pin.”
“Your pin?” Haley asks.
“Yes, when you give a girl your fraternity pin to wear, it’s like you’re going steady. Dating exclusively.”
“And letting all the other frat boys know that she’s off-limits,” my dad teases.
“And then you lived happily ever after?” Haley asks, doe-eyed.
“Not exactly,” Mimi says. “A year later, he told me he wanted to marry me. I assumed that meant a proposal was happening soon. I waited and waited. For five months. And when he gave me a piece of jewelry for my birthday that wasn’t a ring, I lost it.”
“She broke up with me,” Papa says. “Called me a liar. And I was clueless. But I got smart pretty quick. Let’s just say, the next piece of jewelry she got was this ring.” He holds up Mimi’s hand.
“Two months later,” Mimi huffs, which makes me laugh.
“You didn’t date until college. Did you fall in love before that?” I ask.
“Twice,” Mimi says. She goes on about the two other loves she had, but she says after she kissed Papa, she just knew he was the one.
“Our story was different,” Grandpa Mac says. “We grew up in the same small town. Our best friends dated, and we often got dragged along. Her parents didn’t want her to be alone with a boy, so she always had to double date—even though we often left them alone.”
“We did,” Grandma Mac agrees. “I always thought he was cute, and we became friends, but I suppose we both resisted because it felt like we were being pushed together.”
“And you don’t push around that woman.” Grandpa Mac laughs. “But then, one night, she was at the library, studying by herself. I took one look at the complicated math equations she was doing and knew I’d never best her with my intelligence, so I turned on the charm.”
“I rolled my eyes at his flirtation because it was Doug. When we left the library, it was raining, so he offered me a ride home. I accepted, and when he politely opened the car door for me, I think that was the first time I felt it. Like that flicker of possibility in my brain.” She smiles widely. “When he dropped me off, he asked if I would consider going on a date with him. Alone.”
“And she was so incredibly flattered because, clearly, I was a catch,” Grandpa Mac says. “I had a hot-rod Chevy and a head full of hair.”
Everyone laughs.
“And all this time,” Grandma Mac says, “you’ve had no idea that it was your incredible humbleness that attracted me. Needless to say, I said yes. We went on a date. And not to a drive-in movie either, which was all the rage back then. Instead, he took me to dinner at his country club, and afterward, they had a band and dancing. And not the kind of dancing we did at school dances—ballroom-style dancing. Let’s just say, I stepped on his feet a few times.”
“Quite a few times, but I was a strong leader, and we muddled through it. Truth is, she could have stepped on my feet a million times because I could barely feel it when she was in my arms. Still feel that way,” he says, taking her hand in his and kissing it.
And I fully know what Mimi meant yesterday when she said that I am surrounded by love.
I’m helping clean up from lunch when the doorbell rings. Jadyn goes to answer it and comes back with a package.
“What’s that?” I ask. “Samples?”
“No,” she says, opening the box and pulling a DVD and a portable hard drive. “We had so many old videos, and I had them digitized.” She picks up the disc. “But this I’m dying to see. They made a compilation of our lives.”
“Wow. That will be cool. Maybe we can watch it tonight? It is movie-by-the-pool night.”
“Oh,” she says, smiling, “that’s true. You know what? Don’t tell anyone, and we’ll surprise them.”
I spend the afternoon out in the boat with Haley, my dad, and Madden, who is attempting to perfect a flip on the wakeboard. But the most fun is when my dad teaches me to drive the boat while someone is skiing.
And he even lets me pull him.
I guess I’m the only one in the boat old enough, but it still feels empowering, and I’m thrilled that he trusts me—especially considering how they all tease me about being a horrible driver.
So, I hit a few curbs here and there. So what?
By the time we pull back into the dock, the movie screen is set up, cocktail hour is starting, and Jennifer is bringing out freshly baked pretzels with dipping sauces.
Phillip has the grill fired up, and I can smell the hamburgers and hot dogs cooking.
I look around for Chase.
He and my brother left for the resort right after lunch. According to the all-knowing activities board, they had a tee time with the grandpas.
And when I saw it, I was sad.
Because I was hoping to talk to him. Hoping to apologize for how I’ve been acting.
Hoping to hang out with him.
I know after the movie, everyone will probably go to bed, which gives me an idea.
I run into the house, and for the first time, I write an activity on the board.
Everyone fills their plates and then finds a spot either in the pool or on the chairs and chaises surrounding it.
Being my new, helpful self, I hand out warm, buttered popcorn and offer them their choice of flavored toppings.
I’m just sitting down to eat when the golfers get back, grab their food, and join us.
“So, I know you’re all expecting a Disney movie, but I have a little surprise for before that,” Jadyn says, standing up, remote in hand.
Haley takes a seat next to me. Damon and Chase load up their plates and sit at the small patio table with us. I want to ask how golf was. How Chase is.
But the video starts. Music plays, and we see Jadyn coming through a set of doors, looking beautiful in a classic, strapless, tulle-skirted wedding gown. But what you notice the most is the brilliant smile on her face. She literally looks like she’d like to hike up her skirt and run down the aisle.
Suddenly, Papa comes into the picture, and she hooks her hand through his elbow.
And it makes my heart drop right away. I look over to my dad and think how sad it would be not to have him walk me down the aisle.
Music from the church keeps playing, but the video changes, rolling back in time to Jadyn’s parents wearing Nebraska shirts, tailgating at a game with a very young-looking Grandma and Grandpa Mac. I have seen old photos of them in the past, but I’m really struck by how much Chase resembles Jadyn’s father, Michael—the man he shares a middle name with.
The photos scroll through to Phillip and Jadyn as babies, quick little clips of them growing up together. If you didn’t know better, you might think they were Chase and me. There are more photos showing their growth until upper grade school when Dad, Papa, and Mimi are added into the mix.
It’s really fun to watch this. It’s almost like a time-lapse.
I look around at everyone and enjoy watching their expressions. The grandparents are looking a little misty about it all. Dad is grinning like a maniac now that he’s part of the show.
Phillip is holding Jadyn’s hand, just like she told me he did at the funeral.
It’s also interesting to see my mom and dad together, legitimately looking in love.
And it makes me happy to know that they were that way once.
Now, we’re back at the wedding.
Phillip and Jadyn are standing under a hanging altar made of white branches. It’s adorned with purple flowers and dripping with crystals. They turn toward each other and start saying their vows.
Jadyn goes first. Phillip David Mackenzie, I love you. I love how you’ve always been there for me. How you think you need to protect me. How you make me coffee every morning. How you always know exactly what I need. How, when I lay my head on your shoulder, I can fall asleep in a heartbeat. I love that you’ve called me Princess since I was ten, and I love how you can practically read my mind. I love the way you look at me and how your smile lights up a whole room.
The wedding video fades away, but her vows keep going with more videos of their life together. Of them with their first baby, a yellow Labrador puppy named Angel, who was Chase’s best friend. In pretty much every photo after that of Chase, Angel is right there. I look over at him and notice his eyes looks shiny. She passed away after a long and happy dog life. There are a ton of video clips of Chase and me as babies, of our parents and their friends. Lots of backyard barbecues.
When I was little, I used to tell my parents I was gonna marry a prince. They told me I was silly, and I should marry you. Little did we know, we were both right. For a long time, I didn’t think my prince existed, but then I realized he’d been standing next to me my whole life.
And just like time, the video follows what happened next. Damon and Haley are born, and we witness the growth of the four of us. Playing together in the backyard, swimming in the lake. So much time together that it brings tears to my eyes. And the words that Jadyn spoke to Phillip, about how her prince had been standing next to her, her whole life. I stop watching the video, my eyes and thoughts focused on Chase. Wondering if I should or if I shouldn’t tell him how I really feel about him. If it’s worth the risk.
If I’m ready for him.
I’m still not sure, I think, just as Jadyn’s vows continue.
Thank you for believing in us, even when I wasn’t so sure. Thank you for loving me, even when I’m stubborn and convinced I’m never wrong. Thank you for making me believe true love, the fairy-tale kind, actually exists. It will be my extreme honor to spend the rest of my life with you. To cherish you, to love you, and to be yours forever.
And I wonder if it’s possible.
If a fairy-tale kind of love exists.
But when I look around the patio, I see proof that it does. Three out of the four couples present have been together for years. And while my dad’s first marriage didn’t end up lasting, I do think he and my mom must have been happy—at least in the beginning. And he certainly has that kind of love now with Jennifer.
The video switches back to the wedding, my dad placing a ring in Jadyn’s palm so she can put it on Phillip’s finger. Phillip then starts speaking his vows to her.
And these I really want to hear. I want to know from Phillip’s point of view what he felt about her. If he asked her to marry him when they were kids, was he serious about it?
Jadyn James Reynolds, I love you. I loved growing up with you. I loved fighting you with swords and climbing trees with you. I really loved watching you end relationships with all the dumb boys you dated and how you’d always run to me for comfort.
Um, this is getting a little too close to home. I always go to Chase when I need comfort.
I love how I’m the first person you call when you need someone. I love how, all our lives, no matter where we are or who we’re with, whether we’re all alone or in a crowd, when you flash that little grin at me, I know exactly what you’re thinking.
I think back to the other day when I did the same thing to Chase. Flashed him a grin, crooked my finger, and got him to come to me without saying a single word.
I love the way you look at me, like I’m the only guy in the world, and how, when I hold you, I feel like I could conquer that world. I asked you to marry me when we were ten, and I’m here today, making good on that promise. No one has ever compared to you. You’ve always been my world. You’re my best friend, my love, my life. My Princess.
More videos are flashing by, all us kids now. Growing, playing together, playing sports, fishing and swimming at the lake behind our houses. Out on the pontoon boat. With all our friends. At the age we are now. The video is probably coming to an end.
But they are all sort of one big blur as I listen closely to Phillip’s words.
I shouldn’t do it, but I glance at Chase again and realize he’s been looking at me.
Our gazes meet, an invisible force holding us together.
When we were kids, I used to pretend to be your knight in shining armor, and now, with this ring, I promise to be the man to protect you, to cherish you, to support your wild ideas, to not get mad when you bring home another pair of shoes, to love you, to rescue you, to not be bossy, to adore you, and to continue this adventure of life with you, right by my side, for the rest of our lives.
I can see the video flashing photos by with my peripheral vision, but what matters most is seeing Chase mouth, I love you.
My heart stops beating.
Emotions flood my entire being.
I love you, too, I mouth back.
His head nods, gesturing back to the screen, just as the pastor says, “I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss your bride.”
And does Phillip ever give her a kiss. It’s a lean her back and kiss her like it’s their last one sort of kiss. An epic kiss. The kind of kiss I hope to someday have.
I present to you Mr. and Mrs. Phillip Mackenzie, the pastor says, and their favorite college fight song starts playing as they walk down the aisle as husband and wife.
When the video stops, Phillip gets up, wiping a few tears, and raises his glass to everyone. “We are so lucky to be gathered here, with all of you, on this trip. We love you all. Thank you for being a part of our family and a part of our lives.”
We all raise whatever drinks we have in front of us, and my dad says, “Hear, hear.”
Even though Chase and I have barely spoken the last few days, I know things will be okay.
Until I look at him again and notice a little hickey on his neck, which makes me practically see red.
I exhale loudly, anger washing over me. I want to hunt down the girl who gave it to him.
Instead, I get up and trade the soda I was drinking with dinner for something a little stronger.
After the kid-appropriate movie is finally over and everyone is dispersing to put kids to bed and go to turn in for the night, Damon and Haley say something about going back to the resort for some late-night fun. They ask if I’d like to join them. I expect that Chase will be going with them, but he tells them he’s tired and going to pass. He gives us a little salute and then goes down to the boathouse.
We had a super-sweet moment earlier tonight, and now, I feel like he’s abandoning me.
Or like he’s mad at me.
Or maybe he really is just tired.
Or maybe he’s hoping I won’t go either.
Once our siblings have left on the golf cart, I run up to my room and change clothes, and then I go down to join him, finding him sitting on the dock, nursing a beer.
There are a lot of things I could say to him. Especially after watching the video tonight. About what we mouthed to each other. About how I wonder what it all means. About how close we’ve always been. About how things are weird right now and that I hate it.
Mostly, I want to know about the freaking hickey, but I don’t want to fight with him.
So, instead, I hold out my hand and say, “There’s a late addition to the activity board. I was wondering if you might want to sign up.”
He curiously tilts his head at me and then takes my hand, allowing me to lead him up the hill and into the laundry room.
“Stargazing with Dani,” he reads. He turns to me and smiles, but the smile is just a small part of his facial expression. His eyes look bright and happy, his brows raised slightly in surprise, but his jaw is still tightly set, like he’s not sure—like he’s doubting my intentions. And that’s not like him.
“I added it just before dinner, but no one probably saw it. And I was sort of hoping that only you would.”
“You want to go stargazing with me?”
“Yeah, Chase, I do.”
“And that’s it?”
“No, that’s not it,” I say with a sigh. “I owe you an apology. An explanation. I’ve been … Damon was right. I’ve been selfish. I haven’t gotten involved. And I’m sorry if I cockblocked you.” Then, I can’t help myself. I roll my eyes, sigh loudly, and point at his neck. “Although it doesn’t seem to have stopped you.”
“What are you talking about?” he asks, his fingers moving to the spot I’m staring at.
“You have a hickey. I don’t like it.”
He looks into my eyes and grins, his jaw not tight anymore. “Your brother is wrong about one thing.”
“What?”
“I like it when you attempt to cockblock me. Because it makes me think you still care about me. Like that, anyway. It’s not a hickey. It’s a rope burn. And it hurts like hell.”
I nod my head, tears filling my eyes. “Does that mean you’ll come with me?”
“That means I’d go anywhere with you, Dani.”
“Good, because we just might stay out all night.”
“We’ll need supplies, if that’s the plan,” he states, always thinking ahead.
“I thought we’d take the Jeep. We could put the top down.”
“Hmm,” he says, rubbing his thumb across his chin. “What if we took that jacked-up pickup instead? We could sit in the back. Might be more comfortable.”
I nod my head. “That sounds even better. I’ll grab the picnic basket I packed.”
Chase stops and looks at me, his head tilted to the side. “You knew I’d go with you, huh?”
“I hoped. But I decided I’d go even if I was by myself.”
Chase smiles brightly. “Good for you. I’ll get a few things to make us more comfortable.”
When we get to the top of the hill, I discover what more comfortable means. Chase gets out of the truck, pulls down the tailgate, and unrolls three pool floats, laying them side by side in the bed and then covering them with a patchwork quilt from the boathouse.
I set the picnic basket on the tailgate, and Chase says, “You want help up?”
“Please,” I say, rolling my eyes at him. I turn around, go to the side of the truck, put one foot up on the big tire, and easily hoist myself up and over the edge and inside.
“Gotta love a country girl,” he teases as he watches me.
He’s tall enough to just stand with his back against the tailgate, put his arms behind him, and jump up to sit on it. Pretty soon, he’s next to me.
He pulls on the hem of my T-shirt and grins. “I can’t believe you’re wearing this shirt. After the fuss you put up about it. And the puke-fest.”
“Don’t remind me. I know I made fun of us all wearing matching family vacation shirts, but I’ve decided it’s cute. And, well, let’s just say, this trip has already made me appreciate our families more.”
“That’s good to hear.” He doesn’t say anything else on the subject. Instead, he looks up at the clear sky. “Well, you certainly picked a beautiful night for your first group activity.”
I stare up at all the stars.
Chase leans back, doing the same.
“Oh, look, there’s the Big Dipper.”
Chase holds his arm in the air but moves it slightly. “And there’s the Little Dipper next to it. And that,” he says, pointing toward the sky, “I think those three bright stars are Orion’s Belt.”
“And look, there’s the V of Taurus.”
“You remember?”
“Of course I remember my sixteenth birthday, Chase.”
“I meant, the part like this. When I showed you it. We kissed that night.”
“We’ve always kissed.”
“Yeah,” he says with a sigh.
But I know what he’s referring to. That night, it was more than a friendly kiss. It was the first time that his hands wandered a little. And I actually let them. Strictly on top of clothes, innocent stuff, but the next day, Matt asked me to be his girlfriend.
The girl Chase liked started dating someone else last summer. He was hurt, I guess you could say. Upset.
And it hits me.
I was the girl Chase liked.
“And for your birthday, I looked up how to find the sign of Virgo, remember?” I say, trying to change the subject while processing this.
I. Was. The. Girl. Chase. Liked. Why is this such a surprise to me?
Chase doesn’t miss a beat though. He points back toward the Big Dipper. “Start from the cup and trace the handle until you find the bright star.”
“Arcturus,” I continue. “Keep tracing until you find the blue star in the middle of the Y, and that is Virgo.”
We sit in silence for a bit. I’d say it’s a comfortable silence, but I’m feeling anything but.
I’m trying to think of something to say when Chase says, “That was the first time I’ve ever really listened to my parents’ wedding vows.”
I take a deep breath and gather my thoughts. He wants to change the subject, too. “They were beautiful. Heartfelt.”
“They sounded like something I would say to you if we ever got married.”
Or not.
I turn to face him. “Can you imagine that? Us married?”
“You’re the only person I’ve ever imagined being married to, Dani,” he says seriously.
“Doesn’t it sort of freak you out that our story could be a lot like your parents?”
“The only thing that’s the same is the fact that we grew up together.”
“And that we’re best friends. That you’re always there for me.”
“That’s because that’s what best friends are supposed to do,” he counters. “Sure, on the surface, there are similarities but yet not.”
“What’s different?”
“You,” he says, pushing my bangs out of my face and looking into my eyes. “You don’t need me the way my mom needed my dad. You’re stronger. More independent.”
“Says the guy whose shoulder I cry on.”
“That’s only because your parents were getting a divorce and you were going through a rough time. Your dad used to call you a firecracker when you were little. I thought of that today, watching that video clip where you and Haley were all dressed in sequins for some patriotic cheer thing.”
“I loved that outfit.”
“My mom was a tomboy. I mean, don’t get me wrong, you can throw a football as good as I can, but you’ve always been girlie.”
“And now that I think about it,” I say, “your personality is a mix between your mom’s and dad’s. You’re levelheaded, and you act older than your age, like your dad, but you’re cool under pressure, like your mom. And although you’re very humble, I think you’re learning to like some of the hype.”
“How about we just be ourselves and not worry about them?”
“Sounds like a plan,” I tell him as I sit back up. I’m the only person he’s ever pictured marrying? “I brought champagne for me, snacks for you.”
“Hey,” he says, grabbing me around the waist, pulling me back down, and tickling me. “I like champagne, too.”
I laugh and try to squirm away from him, but he’s leaning over me, moving closer.
I consider reaching up, wrapping my fingers around his neck, and bringing his lips to mine. But he backs away quickly to get the picnic basket.
He pops the champagne and pours us some while I spread out the food in front of us. I consider putting it between us, thinking a barrier might be a good thing, but realistically, Chase will eat it all, and my defenses will be gone.
Or maybe I don’t want anything to be between us.
And right now, there isn’t. I’m not dating anyone. He’s not dating anyone.
He holds his cup up and presses it against mine. “To nights like this,” he says.
I gulp. I’m so torn. Throw myself at him or pull back?
He takes a little slice of aged Gouda, sets it on a gourmet cracker, and then folds prosciutto on top of it before holding it up to my mouth.
I smile at him and take a bite. “My favorite combination,” I say, savoring the flavors melded together.
“I think I know that,” he teases.
“Well, I can do the same, you know. Just because you eat everything in your wake doesn’t mean you don’t have favorites.” I pick up an apple slice, add a piece of Parmesan, and then top it with rosemary and sea-salted Marcona almond and hold it up to his mouth.
We snack and drink—well, mostly, he eats, and I drink. I’m on my second cup of champagne. And I’m finally—thankfully—starting to feel it a little.
“It’s funny. Your mom and Jennifer and I were talking about life and love the other day on the dock, and somehow, they got on the subject of losing their virginity. Jennifer was in the back of a pickup, like this.”
“Sounds romantic,” he scoffs, rolling his eyes.
“No, she said it actually was. I guess he went out and bought a blow-up camping mattress, put it in the back of his truck, and covered it with quilts his grandmother had made. They parked by the lake, ate a picnic he had packed, drank a cheap bottle of wine, and did it that night, under the stars.”
Chase raises an eyebrow at me and smirks. “If you were still a virgin, we could re-create that now. Just replace the cheap wine with good champagne. Are you ever going to tell me what happened with you and Matt?”
“I really don’t want to talk about Matt.”
Chase gives me that look.
“Fine. Let’s say that I was committed to him, but he didn’t return the favor.”
“You realize that everyone knows that, right? That I’ve known that?”
“Then, why did you make me tell you? Feel the need to rub it in? Hurt me more?”
“Absolutely not. I just want you to talk to me. You can talk to me about guys, you know.”
“Does that mean you’ll talk to me about girls?”
“What do you want to know?”
“I saw Kelsey’s name on the calendar,” I growl. I can practically feel my fangs coming out.
“Yeah, her grandparents have a condo just around the bend of the lake. She thought it would be fun for us to hang out.”
“It’s supposed to be family only.”
“Her trip was planned well before mine. They come the same week every year. I asked my parents and your dad before I told her it was okay. I don’t know why you care. It’s not like we’ve been hanging out that much despite my attempts.”
“Your attempts?” I scoff. “You’ve been going to the resort, picking up girls.”
“I didn’t go tonight.”
“Because you said you were tired.”
“Because I was hoping to spend time with you. But I’m not going to beg, Dani. A guy can only take so much of having his heart stomped on before he just gives up.”
I whip my head in his direction and suck in a breath. “I’ve stomped on your heart?”
He leans back. “Maybe you are like my mom,” he states. “Everyone said she was clueless, too.”
“But she told me she wasn’t! She told me how they used to stare up at the stars and think about how infinitely big the universe was and how small they felt in comparison. She said that’s why it took them so long to get together. Because she felt small in comparison to how big their love felt.”
“Is that how you feel?” he asks, leaning toward me, his eyes full of emotion.
“I understand why she felt that way. When you’re young, like our age, it does feel that way, you know,” I say gently. I’m not sure I’m ready for Chase yet. Or if I ever will be.
But when he takes my hand and says, “And I completely disagree. Sitting here with you, under the stars, makes me feel like anything and everything is possible.”
And this time, I kiss him.