Chapter 11
Griffa sat on the back lawn in the late morning sun with her legs out in front of her. She closed her eyes as the breeze hit her face. It was a perfect spring day. She put her hands on the grass and dug into the earth. She felt the magic all around her as it swirled inside her. She listened to it sing to her softly. She had taken so many things for granted in her life. She vowed to never do so again.
As she listened to her magic she couldn’t decide if it felt so strong because she was cut off from it for so long, or if her magic had really grown in power since her realization, she was the queen. Either way, she felt connected to her magic in a way she never had before. She was aware of its presence at all times.
It had been almost a week since she had left Aurumist. She still felt like she was waking up from a long, dark nightmare. Her injuries were healing. She didn’t ache all the time as she did before. She was beginning to have an appetite again. Her mind still felt cloudy at times. She was scared of things that never frightened her before, things like the dark, loud noises, and someone touching her without warning.
Sometimes at night when it was dark, she could still smell her cell and feel the hard, cold stone underneath her. She would wake up shivering and crying. Ansel would hold her possessively and cover her in his protector’s magic, and she would fall back to sleep feeling safe and loved.
Her relationship with Ansel had changed. It had become something more. She still loved him as she did before, but she was connected with him in a whole new way. There was a new dynamic in everything they did together. She was aware when he was near at all times. She wondered if all kings and queens felt the same about their protector or if her and Ansel’s connection was enhanced due to their love.
As though she had summoned him, Griffa felt Ansel approach even before she heard his footsteps on the grass. He came and sat next to her. She turned slightly and leaned into him.
“What are you doing out here?” he asked after kissing her quickly on the forehead.
“Just enjoying the day. I wasn’t able to be outside for so long. I forgot what the sun felt like.” She sat up and raised her face to the sun.
She saw Ansel give her a sad smile. He covered her hand with his own, and Griffa felt the now familiar spark of his protector’s magic mingle with her own.
“Has Max spoken to you yet?” asked Griffa.
“No, not since the night you came home. He avoids me at all times if he can. I’ve tried to talk to him, but he won’t listen.”
“He will,” said Griffa turning to look at Ansel. “We have to give him time. It was very hard for him in the palace.”
“It was hard for both of you,” said Ansel. “You were there too long.”
“One day would have been too long,” said Griffa darkly. “What’s done is done. You got us both home safe.”
Ansel looked at Griffa and it seemed like he wanted to say something.
“What?” asked Griffa. “I can tell you want to tell me something, so please do.”
Ansel took a deep breath. “You haven’t talked about your time in Aurumist.”
“I haven’t, and I would like to forget it.”
“Every night you wake up after a nightmare, shivering and crying. You can barely stand to be in the dark at all. Do you think talking about what happened will help?”
Griffa pulled her knees to her chest. She wrapped her arms around them. “I don’t know. I don’t know if I can talk about it. It was awful.”
“Is it me? Could you talk to someone else, maybe Issa or Talon?” asked Ansel.
“No, if I was going to tell anyone how it made me feel, it would be you. I just don’t want to hurt you, Ansel. I know how you still blame yourself for all that happened. Why would I tell you what happened to me and make you go through it? It will change nothing.”
“Max has already told me plenty of what you went through. I have very vivid images in my mind that haunt me, Griffa. I saw how you looked when we brought you home. I see you now and what they have done to you. You aren’t going to be able to shield me from my shame.”
Griffa rested her chin on her knees. “I would tell you there is no reason for shame, but I know it won’t do any good.”
“No, it won’t,” said Ansel quietly. They were both quiet for a moment. “Will you tell me something that happened? Something that still scares you.”
Griffa thought about all the things that had happened to her. She was beaten regularly by Philo, but at some point, in her time in Aurumist, she became numb to the pain. She thought about all the elixirs and potions forced upon her, and how humiliating it was to sit in the filth of her cell. She remembered how frustrated she was to be cut off from her magic. She could have told Ansel about all of these things, but there were two things that bothered her worse than anything else that had happened in the palace.
“There were many things that haunt me still, but there are two that particularly frightened me. One you already know.” She saw Ansel turn to look at her out of the corner of her eye. “When I realized who I truly was, I was scared I would lose you. I was scared you would no longer love me. I would lie half awake, drunk on some poisonous elixir and imagine a life where you were nothing but my protector. I thought you might be cold and aloof to me when we met again. I know it sounds like a silly thing to worry about when you are afraid you might be killed every day, but I had a lot of time to dwell on silly things.”
“Griffa, look at me.” Griffa turned her head to see him staring at her. “It’s not silly. I worried about that as well. I knew I loved you, but I was so worried I would lose you. I was scared we would get you back, and you would see me as nothing but your protector. I even started thinking of who would make you a good king consort.”
Griffa gave a small smile. “Who did you have in mind? It wasn’t Talon was it?” Ansel just looked at her. Griffa laughed. “It was Talon, wasn’t it? Well, it wouldn’t have been so bad, I suppose. If I couldn’t have you, I might as well have someone fun by my side.”
“But you will have me, so you don’t have to worry about it,” said Ansel quickly.
Griffa leaned over and kissed Ansel lightly on his lips. She moved back to sitting down and rested her head on Ansel’s shoulder.
“You said two things scared you. What was the other?”
“I was beaten regularly, usually by Philo. He seemed to have some personal vendetta against me and my family. The beatings I got used to, but his words still hurt me,” said Griffa. “Philo like to taunt me. He like to say horrible things to me about you, my father, and my mother.”
Griffa could feel Ansel’s magic become agitated. It surrounded her in a protective circle. “You shouldn’t listen to him. He was always envious of your father.”
“He did say one thing, and it nagged at me. I still dwell on it at night. I know it can’t be true, but it was horrible. He said my father was murdered. He implied someone on the Ring was responsible for my father’s death.”
Ansel tensed up, causing Griffa to lift her head off his shoulder. He turned to look at Griffa.
“What is it, Ansel?” asked Griffa.
“What did Philo say exactly? Do you remember?” asked Ansel urgently.
“He said the Ring was a pit of vipers. He said I should ask them about my father’s death,” said Griffa looking worriedly at Ansel.
Ansel looked out over the back lawn and sighed.
“What is it?” asked Griffa. “Please tell me, Ansel.”
“We need to talk about the Ring soon. You aren’t strong enough yet, but you might have some work to do there. While you were gone, I led the ring in your stead. It did not go well. I ended up walking out of a meeting and not going back. They were talking about leaving you and Max in Aurumist. There was talk of negotiating a peace with the palace.”
“What?” said Griffa incredulously. “They didn’t dare.”
Griffa stood up quickly and started walking back to the house. Ansel jumped up and caught her hand.
“What are you doing, Griffa?”
“I’m going to go call a meeting this instant,” said Griffa fiercely. “I will remind them who leads them and what our values are.”
“Wait, don’t do this now. You’ve barely had time to heal.” Ansel pulled her to him. He took both her hands, and she looked up at him. “I’m not asking you to wait long. Just wait one week, maybe two. We need to come up with a strategy. Talk to Talon, he is on your side. The whole Valley council is yours, Griffa. Rest for just a while longer, and then we can deal with the Ring.”
Griffa looked up at Ansel and nodded. “Fine, I will wait no more than two weeks. I will talk with Talon, and we will come up with a plan.”
“Thank you,” said Ansel. He bent down and kissed her. “It’s almost lunch time, and you aren’t allowed to miss any meals.” He offered her his arm, and she took it. They walked together towards the back door of the manor.
“Speaking of the Valley council, did I see Cillian here this morning?” asked Griffa.
“You did. You’ve missed out on some developments. I will fill you in over lunch.”
Two days later Griffa was sitting on the sofa in the parlor after supper reading a book while Talon and Kedan watched her. They pretended to read, but every time she looked up at least one of them was staring at her over a book. Ansel had gone to the Valley to check on his guards there. He didn’t want to go, but Griffa encouraged him. She told him to go, so he went. He would be back late that night.
Griffa put her book down and looked at Talon and Kedan. “You two don’t have to sit there and pretend to read. Aren’t there other things you need to be doing?”
“Maybe we wanted a quiet night of reading, Griffa,” said Talon. “I’ve been meaning to read this for ages.”
“You’ve been wanting to read about the different species of forest toadstool found in the kingdom?” asked Griffa looking at Talon’s book.
“Yes,” I have a wide variety of interest,” replied Talon.
“Ansel told you to watch me, didn’t he? If you are going to insist on watching me all night, let’s at least have a little fun.”
“What did you have in mind?” asked Talon throwing his book on a nearby table.
“Well, I hardly know you, Kedan. You live in my home. You came and helped fetch me from that wretched place. We should at least get to know one another.”
“What would you like to know?” Kedan put his book down.
“Wait,” said Talon. “We should have drinks first. Trust me, Kedan, if you want to get good stories out of Griffa it only takes a few glasses of wine.”
“I am not opposed,” said Griffa smiling at Talon.
Talon got up and grabbed some wine. He poured Griffa a glass and handed it to her. He poured two more and sat down next to Griffa on the sofa. “Come sit closer to us Kedan.”
Kedan got up and sat on the chair closest to Griffa.
Griffa looked at Kedan “From what Ansel has told me, you were the Lord of the Kingdom?”
“I was. I was chosen before I could walk. I grew up being trained as the Lord of the Kingdom. I moved into the palace when I was twelve.”
Griffa took a drink from her glass. “Did you enjoy your life as lord?”
“I thought so at the time. Now I’m not so sure. It was very dull, and not very fulfilling,” replied Kedan.
“You were crowned a king, I believe. I met your wife. She is called a queen,” said Griffa.
“I was crowned a king, but it was an empty title. I found out what was planned by Golnar and the council, and I couldn’t stand for it. I ran away. I was given your name,” said Kedan.
“Ansel told me.” She looked at Kedan as she took a drink.
“Can I ask you a question?” asked Kedan looking at Griffa.
“Yes, what would you like to know. I’ll tell you if I can answer it,” replied Griffa with a sly smile.
Kedan smiled back. “We ran into my mother as we were leaving the palace. She told me I owed you a great debt. What did she mean by it?”
Griffa waved her hand at Kedan as she drained her glass. She held it out to Talon who refilled it. “You don’t owe me anything.”
“But what did she mean?” asked Kedan.
Griffa took a breath. “I helped deliver your son. Your wife was having troubles. and I helped things along.”
Kedan looked at Griffa and took a long drink. “You were there for the birth?”
“Yes, your mother came and got me out of my cell and asked if I would help. I couldn’t let an innocent child die, or a mother suffer. She took me to Teryn, and I used a little magic to help out. I’m glad I was successful. You have a very beautiful son, Kedan. I was supposed to tell you. I was also supposed to tell you your mother and wife miss you.”
Kedan refilled his glass and took a drink. “Griffa, may I call you Griffa?” Griffa nodded. “Griffa, you may not want to believe it, but I owe you a great deal.”
“You risked your life to save me. I would say we are even.”
“Hardly,” said Kedan, staring at Griffa.
“This is too serious of a conversation,” said Talon.
“Yes, let me ask something else,” said Griffa smiling. “Kedan, what do you do for fun?”
“I like to fence. I like sword play.”
“Do you really!” said Griffa excitedly. “We shall have to match one another. I adore sword play.”
“Careful, Kedan, Griffa is good at almost everything she does. She doesn’t like to lose. Quite a temper, too.”
Griffa rolled her eyes at Talon and took a long drink. She turned to Kedan as Talon refilled her glass. “Talon and I have a little bit of a history. He tends to think the worst of me.” She leaned on Talon.
“That is not true at all. I take offense. I have the highest opinion of you, Griffa. I don’t think you wanting to win is a fault. I rather like how determined you are,” said Talon.
Kedan smiled at both of them. “What kind of history do you two have?”
Griffa looked at Talon with one eyebrow raised.
“A rather nice one,” said Talon smiling at Griffa.
“I’m not ashamed of it,” said Griffa. She felt rather good after a few glasses of wine. “Talon and I were very good friends. It was a few years ago.”
“It was barely two years ago, Griffa. That last time had to have been less than two years ago.”
“I said a few years.” Griffa took a few sips of wine. “I will say, I remember the times we spent together very fondly.”
“Griffa,” said Talon with a sly smile at Kedan. “Where do I rank on your list?”
“My list? My list of what?”
“You know what I’m talking about.” He flashed her a seductive smile that she was very familiar with.
“Oh,” said Griffa. “Hmm, let me think. I would say second, but don’t get too excited. I don’t have a very long list.”
“So, I was first until recently,” said Talon sounding delighted.
“You’ve became second let me see how many months ago?” said Griffa thinking. “Eight or nine months I believe. You became a very low second just this week.”
“What do you mean?” asked Talon. He glanced at Kedan who leaned in.
Griffa gave them both a sly smile. “I’m just going to say that it’s a shame other sovereigns didn’t get to experience their protectors and their magic in certain ways.”
Kedan staring laughing as Talon said, “You want to elaborate?” Griffa shook her head and giggled.
“Ok, quiet down. Let me ask you a question, Talon,” said Griffa turning to Talon and swaying slightly. She placed her head on Talon’s shoulder and looked up at him.
“Of course, my dear. Ask whatever you like,” said Talon looking down at her.
“Where am I on your list? Be honest, I know it’s a much longer list than mine.”
Talon looked at Griffa with a small smile. She raised her head and looked at Talon expectantly. He drained his glass and stared at her.
“Are you going to tell me or not?” asked Griffa. “You can be honest, Talon, I can take it.”
Talon opened his mouth when Max came into the room.
“What is going on in here?”
“Max!” said Griffa excitedly. “Come join us! Have a drink.”
Max walked over and looked closely at Griffa. “I think you’ve had enough, Griffa.” He turned to Talon. “Did you do this to her?”
“No one did anything to me, Max,” said Griffa looking at Max. “I’m just having a few drinks with my new and old friend.”
“I think you should go to bed,” said Max.
“Who needs to go to bed?” asked Ansel as he walked into the room.
“Ansel!” said Griffa jumping up. She walked over quickly and threw herself into his arms. She leaned up and kissed him.
“Look at you,” said Ansel smiling at her. “Drinking with Talon I see.”
“And Kedan,” said Griffa. “I think I like him.”
“Are you alright with this?” asked Max angrily.
“Griffa can spend her time as she pleases.” Ansel moved Griffa to his side. She snuggled up against him and put her hand on his chest.
Max shook his head and walked out, as Ansel sighed.
“Do you want a drink, Ansel?” asked Talon.
Ansel looked down at Griffa. She smiled up at him suggestively. “No, I think I will take this one to bed.”
“Yes, I’m sure your queen needs your attention tonight, protector,” said Talon laughing.
Griffa bent over laughing. Ansel looked at her.
“What?” asked Griffa standing back up. She wasn’t sure why everything was so funny.
“Do I want to know what they are laughing about, Kedan?” asked Ansel
“Probably not.”
Ansel and Griffa turned to leave the room, when Griffa turned back.
“Talon, I’m just going to assume I am number one on that list we were talking about.”
Talon responded by raising his glass to her.