: Chapter 11
I clean myself up, then I wipe all the dots of potatoes off the floor while trying to keep Squint from licking them. I wipe the walls as Dustin cuts the brisket. The potatoes have just come out of the oven, and everything smells divine. I resolve to buy a cookbook when I get home so I can eat better meals.
Dustin gets out a pot holder, and I grab it from him.
“What?” he asks.
“Did you make this?”
He chuckles. “Yes.”
It’s red, white, and blue with a star in the middle. “It’s adorable. How old were you?”
“About ten probably.”
I give it back to him. “So cute.”
When we sit down to eat, Dustin looks over at me. “Well, now you know not to remove the beaters from the bowl until the power is off.”
“I think that’s something you should have told me right away.”
He scoffs. “So, all this is my fault?”
I smile sweetly at him. “Yes.”
He lets out a laugh. “All right. I’ll take the blame.”
My insides do funny things as I stare at his laugh lines. Why does he have to be the most handsome man on the planet? Why couldn’t Jera’s neighbor be some troll? I’m in so much trouble. I look down at my plate and concentrate on eating.
Of course, the brisket melts in my mouth and the cheesy potatoes are to die for. This man can seriously cook. And now I’m fantasizing about marrying him and eating like this all the time.
A few minutes go by in silence before he speaks. “What are you thinking about?”
“Nothing,” I say quickly, still trying to push the image of him as my husband out of my head. Imaginary Dustin looks fantastic in a tuxedo.
He raises his eyebrows but doesn’t press the matter. “How do you like the meal?”
“It’s delicious.” I shove a large scoop of potatoes into my mouth to prove it.
He seems pleased at this. We eat in silence for another few minutes. I try not to look at him, because when I do I seem to forget who I’m supposed to be.
Dustin takes a sip of his water. “Do you eat out a lot, since you don’t cook?”
I know Jera does, so I nod. “Yeah.”
“Do you have a favorite restaurant?”
I have no idea what Jera prefers, so I shake my head. “Not really.”
A noise comes from the other room, like something fell on the floor. Dustin looks at Squint, who is still curled up by the patio door.
“What was that?” I ask.
“I don’t know. I’ll go check.” He wipes his face with his napkin and leaves the room. Moments later he comes back in holding a framed photo. “A picture fell from the wall. I guess the nail gave out.” He sets the picture on the table.
“For a minute there I thought you had a ghost.”
“Maybe I do,” he says, smiling at me.
I turn to the photo on the table. “Who is that?”
“My grandmother. In a lot of ways I was closer to her than my own mother. But she died when I was young.”
“Oh. I’m sorry.”
I eat the last of my brisket and set my fork down on my plate. My mind wanders to the gala event tonight. I’ll have to go out into public and be seen as Jera. I was supposed to schedule her hair stylist to come, but my phone doesn’t work. My throat tightens with the thought. Why did I say yes to this, anyway?
We finish and I take the plates to the sink. I wash the dishes in silence while Dustin dries them and puts them away. I sense a shift in the mood, but I’m now too nervous about the turtle benefit tonight to put a lot of thought into it.
Dustin puts the last dish in the cupboard and turns to me. “Look, I think I made a mistake tonight. I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable or upset you.”
“I’m not upset.” Lie. I’m frustrated with myself for flirting with him and allowing myself to forget why I’m here.
He folds his arms and gives me a look like he doesn’t believe me. “I’m sorry for stepping over the line earlier. I’ll try to remember what you said yesterday.”
“What I said?”
“That you want to keep things on a friendship level between us.”
Guilt surfaces and I put a hand on his arm. “It’s not you. It’s me.” Truth. I’m feeling all kinds of bad for the way I acted. I started the flirting. He was just acting on my lead.
His expression softens. “I understand.”
“Will you still take me to the charity gala?”
“Of course. I’ll pick you up at six.”
I whistle and Squint comes running. “Thank you.”
What in the world does a person wear to a ‘Save the Sea Turtles’ charity party? I would text Jera to ask, but, alas, my phone is still stuck in a Ziploc baggie in the hopes that I don’t lose my only picture of my father. I’m counting down the hours until I can check it. I have 24 to go.
I pace Jera’s closet, looking at all the sequined gowns and sparkly shoes. After riffling through all her clothes, I find a plain black dress, and a simple pair of pumps. Perfect.
I get dressed and stand in front of the full-length mirror. I twist from side to side, examining myself. “What do you think, Squint?”
My dog looks up at me and barks. I laugh. “That good, huh?”
I sit down at the makeup table. I’m kind of lost, but I try harder this time, as I’ll be out in the public eye acting as my sister. Luckily I’d found a couple of professional photos of Jera in a magazine, and I try to duplicate her look. It’s not terrible when I’m finished, and I’m pleased with myself.
I leave my hair down, just give it a little curl on the ends, like I often see in photos of Jera. It looks pretty good, if I do say so myself. I stand and take one last look in the mirror.
A bell chimes which I know means Dustin is at the front gate. I grab Squint and rush down the stairs. I know I can’t bring him along. This isn’t the type of event where you can bring your dog. I just need him in my arms for a few more minutes before I say good-bye. I press the button that opens the front gate.
A limousine pulls up in front of my house, and for a second I panic. I’m actually doing this. I’m going to be Jera at some fancy party. I pet Squint and tell myself it will all be okay. Jera didn’t say I had to stay long, right? Just make an appearance.
The limo driver opens the door and Dustin steps out. I give Squint a kiss before setting him on the tile flooring. “I’ll be back soon,” I say, more to calm my own nerves than to calm his. He just sits on the floor and stares at me.
“Be good while I’m gone.” I brush a dog hair off the front of my dress and straighten my spine. I can do this.
I step outside. Dustin is wearing a tuxedo, and I about swallow my tongue. My imagination was so right. He looks like he’s stepped off a movie set.
“You look beautiful,” he says, his gaze traveling over me.
“So do you. I mean…handsome.” Perfect. I’m already making a fool of myself. A horrible thought jumps into my head. No. I’m not making a fool of myself. I’m making a fool of Jera. Dread fills my chest. That’s ten times worse. If I totally mess up, it’s Jera’s name that will be dragged through the mud.
Dustin smiles and helps me into the limo, then joins me. “You look nervous.”
“I’m going to throw up.”
His eyes widen in alarm. “Are you sick?”
“No,” I quickly assure him. “I just get some anxiety when I’m in crowds of people.”
“I didn’t know that about you.”
Great. I’m talking like Mackenzie again. I smooth the front of my dress. “I don’t like people knowing.”
Dustin reaches over and pats my hand. “I won’t tell anyone.”
The gesture and his kind words send a wave of gratitude over me. I have no idea what I would do without Dustin by my side. “Thank you.”
As we drive closer, my arms are empty and weird. I haven’t traveled anywhere without Squint since I got him. It’s making my chest feel all tight and funny. I squeeze my hands into fists and try not to think about the party.
Dustin’s gaze dips to my tight fists. “Just how bad is your social anxiety?”
I take in a deep breath and let it out. “I’ll be fine.” At least, that’s what I’m trying to tell myself.
“Here.” He grabs my hand and pries open my fist, sliding his fingers between mine. “Squeeze my hand when you get anxious.”
“Okay.”
The limo pulls to a stop, and I know it’s showtime. I can do this, I tell myself. The problem is, I know I’m lying.