Moon Child

Dawn walked for a little bit before stopping to lean against a large oak tree. Why did she feel so out of sorts? These people, good people, wanted her to join their community. Why couldn’t she just accept the invitation and start over here? Why didn’t she just walk back to Hazel’s place, slip into the gorgeous blue dress, and create a future here? She could be with Kane, have kids, and live in peace like Jeremiah and Hazel or Marcus and Julie.

She sighed, looking down at her bare feet. She use to slip out of her shoes on her parent’s farm and run through the field in the rain like she was in some kind of dramatic movie. She would laugh, kick up the water and spin around as the droplets fell against her like gentle kisses from the sky. Her mother would yell for her to come back in, warn her of getting a cold or the flu, but she refused. Instead she would just wave and spin around some more.

Her father and brother, the more adventurous ones in the family, would run out after her. The three of them would chase one another, wrestling in the field, tickling, laughing. When they were thoroughly soaked through their mother would finally come out on the porch. Her voice could barely be heard over the storm, but she continued to warn them of sickness anyways.

She smiled as she thought of how her father would run up onto the porch, sweep their mother into his arms, and carry her kicking and screaming into the rain until they were all soaked and laughing. It was amazing, how young her parents had seemed. They were like teenagers and their love had been the unbreakable kind. They were soulmates, something Dawn had wished to find over and over again until her life had been uprooted by monsters.

“Dawn?”

His voice had her gaze moving up from the ground, her arms wrapped around herself as tears filled her emerald eyes.

“Kane.”

Her voice shook as he moved to wrap her in his warm embrace. Her heart raced, salty drops running down her cheeks as she trudged forward.

“Why didn’t you tell me about tonight?”

Her whisper was met with a kiss on the crown of her head.

“I didn’t want you to be worrying your head off all day over something like this. It’s not that big of a deal, just a formality really.”

She frowned.

“A formality?”

He nodded.

“I knew it would scare you, so I told Hazel it wouldn’t be a good idea, but she refused to hear it. She believes in the traditions of our ancestors, and she wants you to be welcomed into our family through a ceremony. It’s not too much, a bonfire with friends, but there will be a ceremony in which you and I…”

She was holding her breath, her heart racing. What would she have to do? Did she have to swear away her freedom? Perhaps she would need to promise her first born or swear an oath to serve only her own pack. What if they tortured her until she turned? What if they forced her to take the form of the animal within?

“…We must swear our loyalty to one another, and then share a drop of blood. By doing this we will be bonded so that I can sense your presence no matter where you go. It’s a homing beacon as well, so that if you are ever lost you can find your way home.”

Home? The word sounded so foreign. They would share an oath and blood and then she would have a home? Why was it so complicated?

“Did you do this with the others in your pack as well?”

He nodded.

“It helps me protect my people.”

He moved away slightly, catching her chin in a gentle hold as he locked gazes with a woman he knew he couldn’t live without.

“Dawn, when we are bonded I will be able to feel you but you will not feel me. That is how an Alpha bond works. You will always be able to find home, find me, but you will not be able to feel what I feel. Pain, anger, nothing. I swear it.”

She frowned.

“You will feel everything I feel though?”

He nodded. Why did that feel wrong? Was it fair for him to feel her but not the other way around? It was like he would be able to read her mind but she could never see into his. Did she want to feel what he felt? It only seemed fair.

“What if…I want to feel what you feel too?”

His eyes widened slightly, making her frown.

“What? Did I say something wrong?”

His grin stretched from ear to ear.

“Gods, you say things that make my heart stop and you don’t even know what you’re saying. Dawn, my goddess, if you want the empathy to go both ways then we would have to bond as true mates.”

She thought over what he said.

“Aren’t we already bonded? When we…you know…”

He shook his head, leaning down to kiss her lips ever so gently before speaking.

“That may be how humans bond, but for changelings to bond they must be in their true forms. The animal.”

Her eyes widened as a dark memory struck through her mind like a spear. That’s what they had wanted? Her old pack, the alpha had tortured her over and over again to try and force the change. She had fought it until he grew tired of her, allowing the other men to do as they pleased. They wanted her to change, but she refused.

“If I turn, what will happen next?”

He cocked his head to the side, watching as a darkness crept into her eyes. She wasn’t fully here, in the present with him. Where was she running off to in her head when she got like this? Her mossy gaze swirled silver as his deep voice held her like an anchor.

“We will mate as animals, and the bond will be made. Human, animal, we will be one. You would feel everything I do and vice versa.”

She nodded, understanding now why they had been so adamant on turning her.

“If we’re bonded, could I leave the pack?”

He hesitated before answering, trying to understand why she would ask such a question. Did she plan on running?

“If we were bonded we couldn’t leave each other for long. The longer we are apart the weaker we would become. Things become complicated when you’re with an alpha. Any other changeling male wouldn’t have to worry as much about threats to their territory or rogue shifters, but I do. I have to be able to protect my people, which means you would have to stay close to me at all times. It would be rough, especially for someone who is use to running free, but I can’t risk the safety of the rest of the pack.”

She nodded, her mind working itself into a fit as she tried to hold onto all of this new information. If she wanted to be with Kane she would have to give up everything else, but would it be worth it? She loved him, but was that enough? What about her past? If they came for her she wouldn’t be able to run, leave to protect the others. She frowned.

“What would happen if I…if one of the people in the bond were to…die?”

His body stiffened, heart racing as he looked deep into her eyes. Why would she ask such a thing? Was she worried about him getting hurt because of her? No, she was probably worried that he would die and she would suffer because of it.

“We would be able to feel each other’s pain and suffering, but it can’t hurt us physically. If one was to die, the other would feel their death as if it were their own and it would drain the survivor’s energy for quite some time. They wouldn’t die though, but I’ve known widows and they’re never the same after the death of their mate.”

She frowned. He would feel her death? It made her sick thinking about it. She never wanted to hurt him or cause him grief, so she simply nodded and looked away.

“Is it ok if I stay out here a bit longer? I need to think things through.”

He stepped back to give her some space, his voice rough as he tried to figure out what she must be thinking.

“Of course. Should I delay the ceremony?”

She shook her head.

“No, I’ll be there.”

His smile was small, hesitant but happy nonetheless.

“Ok. When the moon is high in the sky we will light the bonfire and start the celebration.”

She nodded, watching as he turned to leave. She only had a couple hours before they lit the fire, her walk had turned into a day long venture as she leaned her head back against an old tree trunk. Her exhausted sigh was soft as she tried to figure out what she was going to do.

If she wanted to stay she would have to head back soon. The ceremony would bond her to this pack, but she could still run if she really wanted to. Still, if she stayed she would have to think of the possibility of bonding with another changeling.

If she bonded with Kane she would never be able to run again. She would be a danger to the pack and they didn’t even know the half of it. She didn’t want to risk their safety for her own happiness, her heart aching as she thought back to the day she had been dragged into this cold world.