Mary's Path

The following week Zerden was again waiting for her on Wednesday afternoon. Mary realized that she felt an unpleasant tug in her chest instead of the usual happiness when she saw him. Non the less she smiled at him.

“Want to go to the gardens?” he asked, and Mary got a feeling of déjá-vu.

“I don’t think so Zerden, we were almost caught last time. If Mrs. Meata finds out” she started.

“Please. Com on, it will be fun. I promise, and I have so much to tell you” he said and looked at her with puppy dog eyes.

“Okay, but if some ones there, we leave at once” she said.

“Deal” he said happily and almost dragged her towards the gardens.

“Do you remember that beautiful woman we saw here last time?” Zerden asked as the were walking in the rose garden.

“Yes” Mary said, not sure she wanted to be a part of this conversation.

“So, I have asked around about her”

“Oh, did you find out anything?”

“Yes, her name is lady Sarah, she is the daughter of the earl of Shimroux. She’s here as a lady-of-waiting for the princess. She arrived in the city three months ago and she likes fashion, kittens and raspberry jam” he said.

“That’s a lot of information, and some very specific one”

“I got lucky, one of my friends is going out with the maid that are responsible for lady Sarah. So he gives me all the information I need” Zerden said happily.

“Oh” was all Mary could say.

“He told me that lady Sarah and her friends would be walking in the gardens this afternoon as well” Zerden said.

“What? You brought me here knowing there would be people around?” Mary said nervously.

“Relax, it’s only a couple of ladies. And lady Sarah would never tell on you” he said irritated.

“How do you know that?”

“You can just tell by looking at her that she’s a kind person” he answered.

“Zerden, I really, really, can’t be here” Mary said and felt the panic start to rise.

“I just need to make an excuse to run in to her, so please stick around to help me” he said.

“I can’t. I really can’t Zerden, you know this. And how will it look if she thinks that you are walking in the gardens alone with a girl?”

Zerden considered that for a couple of minutes.

“You are so right Mary. She could misunderstand our relationship. I thought I needed another female as a chaperon, but she will be with other ladies. So, you are right, you don’t need to be here. If you want, you can leave” he said.

“I’ll come find you later to tell you how it went” he finished excitedly.

“Okay, see you later” Mary said while she started to hurry out of the gardens for the second week in a row.

Mary spent almost two hours in the small yard by the kitchen. Sitting in the sun, imagining Zerden and lady Sarah together. When Zerden came walking, Mary’s mood was low.

“There you are” he said excitedly.

“Did you get to meet her?” she asked.

“Yes! And she is just as amazing as I imagined. She is so sweet and lovely, and her laugh is amazing. She is even more beautiful close up.”

“That’s nice”

“When they came walking, I pretended to be looking for a puppy that had run away. She immediately volunteered to help me find it. We talked for almost an hour while we walked around the gardens. Then they needed to leave. I asked if I could meet her again and she said she would like that. But we can’t meet alone, I mean it’s not like when you and I meet. She must protect her reputation. Can you come with me? I told her I have a friend, like a little sister, and that we can trust you to be discreet.” the words just flowed from Zerden in exiting waves.

“Um, I don’t know Zerden. I don’t think that’s a good idea” Mary tried to tell him.

“Please Mary, I need your help with this. You are my friend, aren’t you?”

“I am. But it feels like we are doing something we shouldn’t. Why can’t one of the other ladies come along?”

“Well lady Sarah is a lady, her father is an earl. She can’t really be seen with a common soldier, can she? For now, we need to keep it a secret” Zerden told Mary.

“And you are okay with that?”

“Sure, I know how the court works. It’s about appearances”

“Okay, I guess I can help you. But you know that I usually busy in the kitchen” she said uncertain.

“I know, but we will find a way around that”

“Okay, I guess that is fine then” Mary said.

“Thanks Mary, I really owe you one” Zerden said. “I need to run, I have to try and plan this thing”

“Sure thing. I’ll see you” she said, turning to go into the kitchen.

The rest of the afternoon Mary, again, spent in her room. But this time she didn’t cry. No, this time she tried to get to grips with the new reality.

She made herself think about the fact that Zerden thought about her as a little sister. She forced herself to get used to the thought until she could think it with just a dull ace in her chest.

Then she thought about the fact that he was in love with someone else. That thought was harder to get control over. Every time she thought about it, she had the urge to cry. She continued to torment herself with thoughts about it for hours.

Then it was time for dinner. This time Mary joined the others, she couldn’t risk anyone suspecting that she was unwell.

When she was back in her room, she started training herself to get used to the thought once again. When she finally fell asleep, she had almost managed to make the sharp pain in her chest become a dull one.