Lapidary

I blinked, hoping that my eyes were deceiving me – it wouldn’t be the first time. But when I opened them, my sister was still there, in a sleazy leather skirt with her pink hair in a messy style and heels ridiculously high. She was standing at the edge of the club, and the wall was blocking my view so that I couldn’t see who she was talking to. She was clenching a small plastic packet in her left hand. The tip was sticking out, so it was easy to overlook. My gut twisted as I realized it could only be a packet of Muze.

That fucker was selling drugs to my sister. Without thinking, I stormed over to them and grabbed Ava’s hand to confirm my suspicions.

“Hey!” she cried, but then realized it was me.

I pried open her hand and found the Muze. An image of my sister, high as a kite, flashed through my mind. Before she could say anything, I turned to the person standing behind the wall – a fae male with blue fur on his pointy ears.

“What the fuck is this?” I tossed the Muze into his face.

The packet opened as I threw it, and he inhaled the powdery leaves. He sneezed violently, and I stepped closer to him, not caring that he was bigger and stronger than me. Ava grabbed my arm, trying to hold me back.

“How dare you sell that shit to my sister?”

He rubbed his nose. “What? She’s selling it to me!”

For a moment I just stared at him, and then my sister yanked me back. I turned to her, hoping she would deny it.

“Is that true?” I asked.

“It’s none of your fucking business,” she said. “You don’t just get to walk back into my life and judge me!”

“I’m not judging you,” I countered quickly.

“I get to choose what I want to do with my life.” As she said it, her cheeks turned as pink as her hair, and I wondered if it was from anger or embarrassment.

“If you get caught selling illegal drugs, you’ll be kicked out of medical school,” I warned her. “Is it worth it?”

She grunted. “See what happens when you disappear? You miss out on everything that’s happened.”

I wasn’t sure what she meant by that, and before I could ask, the fae turned around and walked away. My sister angrily shoved me, and I was too surprised to shove her back.

“You’ve lost me my customer!” she screeched. “I need this job, Natka!”

“Why?” My voice was soft. “Clearly Jacob has enough money now so that everyone can live comfortably.”

She glared at me. “You’re not the only one who dreams of leaving and starting their own life somewhere.”

“Being a doctor will open those doors for you,” I said. “You’ll be able to work anywhere you want.”

She laughed bitterly and shook her head, as if she was going to say something but then decided against it.

“Nice dress,” she commented before leaving.

I wanted to follow her but couldn’t risk being fired from My Night Habit. I would work on this strained relationship that I had with Ava. I didn’t know if I could fix it, but I would at least try.

What had happened to the nineteen-year-old who had stolen my clothes and imitated me? What had happened to the innocence? Had I broken her when I left? Was this my fault, like Ryker’s suicide?

Then I heard a voice, mumbling in my head. I hated being a crazy person. And, thanks to everything that had happened, I had not been taking my medication. Fuck.

“Shut up,” I mumbled under my breath before I returned to the club. I headed to the VIP area and took their drink orders. When I poured them their shots, I eyed the bottle, wanting to drown out the voices, but I left it on the counter.

The club closed at four but that didn’t mean that work was over – we still had to clean. The doors closed, music turned off and lights turned on. The place was a mess – filthy glasses were everywhere, and the floor was sticky from spilled drinks. I worked quickly, but efficiently, as I was in a hurry to go home.

I was paid electronically for my shift, and I had made good tips in cash that night. The bartenders left, as well as Sorciz and Zara. I was shortly on their heels when Megzith called me back. I faced the vampire, and suddenly I felt awake and alert.

“Yes?”

“Did you make good money tonight at the VIP section?” she asked.

I raised an eyebrow and refused to take the bait. “Bye.”

Before I could leave, she snaked out her hand and closed her fingers around my wrist. Her grip was as strong as that of an adult man, and I didn’t try to pull free. When I was a kid, my parents had told me to keep my head down and give over. I should only fight if my life depended on it.

“I’ll take that.” Megzith ripped the pouch containing my tips from around my hips.

I glanced past her at Istrag, who had seen her take the pouch. He wasn’t coming over, and he wasn’t going to help. There was no point in running to him, which meant I either had to fight for my money or walk away.

I walked away.

I might have felt embarrassed if I wasn’t so tired and used to feeling like nothing mattered. As I headed to the exit, I saw Devton, and my breath caught. He was as beautiful as ever, watching me with his blue eyes that travelled up my bare legs, to the neon pink dress, then lingered on my gloves and then met my eyes. I felt like he could see through me as if I were as transparent as a wraith.

“Those gloves aren’t part of the uniform,” he said.

I wanted to retort with something witty, but realized I worked for him now, and he had the power to fire me. I nodded to acknowledge that I had heard him and then passed him.

“You know,” he said, making me stop in my tracks. “If only you stood up for yourself like you stood up for others, your life would be much easier.”

There’d been that man I had saved from Astaroth and earlier I had thought I was swooping in to save my sister. Maybe I never stood up for myself because I didn’t feel as if I was worth it.

I didn’t look back at Devton as I left the bar. The voices in my mind started their senseless talking again.