Kanin

I sent the lamp flying across the room. I heard it crash against the floor into a hundred different pieces.

I didn’t stop there. I picked up the chair that sat in front of my desk and slammed it against one of the bookshelves. The legs splintered into my hands. I swung again, screaming as I did so. It finally broke, falling down at my feet.

Blood dripped from my finger tips from my claws digging into my palms. I couldn’t control my wolf. He was screaming just as loudly as my human side was. My hands swept the books from the shelves. I watched them gather in a heap on the floor. I stepped on their spines and sent more to join them. Soon, all my shelves were empty. My floor was littered with open books and debris.

I still kept screaming. I needed to break things. I needed to break everything just like I was broken. I broke the last two remaining chairs. The splinters from the legs biting into my bleeding hands, but I didn’t care.

I pulled the drawers from the desk and sent them crashing against the empty book shelves.

Soon, there was nothing left to break. Everything was already broken, but it didn’t help. It didn’t repair my shattered heart. Everything was too broken. My legs gave out and I tumbled to the floor with all my broken things. Nothing could fix them like nothing could fix me.

I destroyed everything.

I destroyed my brother.

I destroyed my father.

I destroyed her.

Dane once told me I had a lost soul and now I knew he was right.

No one could save me and I was stupid to think that someone could. Not even her.

Especially her.

By thinking she could save me, I’d destroyed her, as well.

She was right. I had killed her. I watched the light leave her eyes with every word I shot at her. I felt her heart break with every single word. I’d done it on purpose to. I destroyed her only because she was too trusting, too forgiving, too loving.

And if I didn’t destroy her, the world would have.

I pulled at my hair, screaming at the top of my lungs. No one came to check on me. The only person that was around was Cade, and I knew he wouldn’t come for me.

I’d destroyed him without meaning to. The one person that would always stick by my side. The only person I could trust, and I’d destroyed him.

He’d pleaded with me not to do what I did to her. He’d tried so desperately to get me to change my mind. In the end, I did what I always do: I listened to only myself. I even ordered him not to speak while I cruelly destroyed her.

Cade won’t even speak to me now. I don’t blame him. I can hear him pacing on the floor below as he listens to me shatter what’s left of my office. I can hear his heart beat racing. I can feel his nerves and worry like its my own. I wish I couldn’t. I wish I didn’t know him so well. I wish I couldn’t read him and feel him like I’m apart of him.

Because that makes me feel worse. It makes me feel worse because he knows what I did was so terribly wrong. Which in turn, I feel like an ache in my heart.

I wish he wasn’t here. I wish he wasn’t here to get caught in my whirl wind.

But he won’t leave. That’s an order he won’t follow.

Cade is a part of me. My brother. My friend.

And I’d destroyed both of us.

I was a lost soul and no one could save me.

Because everyone that tries to save me gets pulled down with me.

Everyone that cares gets destroyed eventually.

So, I’d make sure no one cared again.

There were still a few people out there I had to destroy though.

My father was one of them. He was one of the people I was okay with destroying, okay with letting him get caught up in my storm. Him and his new pack, along with Ean and Bevin. I would destroy them just like they helped destroy her.

I would destroy everything, because that was the only thing I was good at.

Until we meet again...