Chapter Me For You
The light of the day had been replaced by the unrelenting darkness of the night. Callan took in a deep breath and sucked in the air which resembled the fresh aroma of the wood. He was standing near the foot of the high hill which was his one and only spot. The place which was unknown to everyone.
But not after tonight.
Callan was quite nervous as he tapped his foot occasionally and marched his legs to and fro to calm his racing heart. The moon graced the sky and soon the entire land was bathed in its luminosity. He looked at the stars in curiosity and wondered what looked more beautiful. The sky draped in the twinkling or the white macule which glowed in serenity.
The little smile which coloured his face soon vanished for he remembered the reason he was here tonight. He felt the soft panic rushing through his brain as he contemplated to be in the place. All the reasons to not do this crawled over his thoughts and he was dubious once again. He took a deep breath in and braved his heart.
Callan could not back down now.
He looked at the rushing water from the edge of the cliff when another voice attracted his attention. He slowly turned his back to see a black fog surrounding one muscular man who grinned like the happiest person in the world. He stood at a casual distance from the handsome man as he bowed his head in adoration.
Callan nodded in response and hummed in apprehension. He occasionally bit his lips while at other times he moved them to utter some words but failed every time.
The demon saw the quandary and sighed “I see you are still not comfortable in my presence.”
Callan absentmindedly nodded “It will take some time..” He exhaled a deep breath and gulped before saying “You said you would answer my questions when we meet next.”
“I did.” The demon smiled. He saw that Callan was still nervous as he rubbed his thumb to the back of his other palm. The spirit realised that his beloved was in two minds and a bit uncomfortable at the moment “How about we sit somewhere and talk. It would help you calm down.”
Callan nodded again. In the next instance he joined his little finger and thumb and swirled it in a big circle above his head. A large boulder near the shore was displaced from its place as it levitated to move towards the demon. Callan repeated the gesture again as another rock floated in the air to land where he was standing. He gestured the demon to sit as he took his place on the rock in front of him.
Though the demon was disappointed that Callan chose to sit away from him, he understood where he came from. Daragor realised that he cannot rush things. Callan had to be given his time and he should not be forced to accept the spirit, accept the bond..
Callan could not hold his gaze for more than a few moments as his inner turmoil restricted his actions and his resolve dithered. What followed was an awkward silence for a long time before the other worldly being taking charge “You have finally known to use your powers.”
And that did the trick.
Callan smiled a little as he looked at his hands in wonder and childishly flapped them. He lifted his chin at the demon with gratifying eyes “I have been practising in secret.”
He took a breath of confidence to utter those words which were on his minds for a very long time “I-I know that you have expectations from me. I was literally shocked when I came to know that I happen to have a mate. Not that I wasn’t happy.” He paused for a brief moment “Its just that I-I wasn’t expecting...”
“Me..” Daragor interjected.
“A male as a mate..” he bit his lips in hesitation “And of course you.”
“I get it.” The demon lowered his eyes in disappointment. He wavered in his tone as he asked “Do you regret having me as your mate..? I have nothing to do with actions of the human.”
Callan saw the desperation and the guilt which was prominent on the face of the demon. He realised that the alpha had not only wronged his own fated mate but he had also wronged his beasts, his inner self.
“I agree that I am upset with Einar but I am not angry at you or the wolf.”
The words gave Daragor reassurance of a sort as he smiled and looked intently at Callan again. However the silence brought in a radical change in the handsome mans features as his smile faltered and he was pensive again.
“You are nervous..” The demon stated.
Callan sucked in a lot of breath before exhaling slowly to gain some confidence “I have been with women in the past. Usually I take the lead. I generally know what to do. How to approach, how to make my female happy, make her feel loved. This..” He swung his finger between him and the demon “This is all new to me. I know nothing about male mates. In fact I have never been in a relationship with a man.”
“I have never been with anyone ever..”
The words halted Callan’s brain process. He looked at the demon in amusement and felt disgusted about himself. He was already shameful for being unfaithful to Orcus but his regret swelled when he realised that the demon was waiting for him too. In fact both the beasts had killed themselves in the past life just to be with him in this life.
And how did Callan reciprocate.... He betrayed them!
He had slept with multiple women. He maligned himself when he chose others over his fated other half. Most importantly he had the privilege to fall in love again and again. But there was and there always will be only one person for the beasts- Callan.
What had he done!
He was supposed to wait for his other half as all the wolves did. Though he was just a human, he was part of a pack. He should’ve followed the rules and stayed pure. The heaps of shame were burdening his soul as the past cannot be undone now. He felt as if he was the worst mate in the entire lycan history.
He blinked his eyes rapidly as a treacherous bead wet his cheek. He shrugged and stretched his lips to appear happy in front of the demon. Before Daragor could get suspicious about his behavior Callan changed the subject “Tell me something about yourself.”
Daragor saw what his love was trying to do. Callan was avoiding his feelings. He needed distraction and the demon was ready to give anything his mate asked for. He genuinely smiled “I come from the dark realm of the spirits. Among the many clans we have the shedims are the most powerful in our world. My family was the ruler of the clans. I was fourth to the crown but I never showed the qualities of a prince. I was stubborn and selfish. Notorious for creating troubles. My father was deeply upset with my behaviour.”
“So you were a trouble maker?” Callan chuckled
“You could say that.” The demon responded with a chuckle of his own “I never abided by the rules. Our world is harsh.. Pain and suffering gives us pleasure.. I for one loved others misery tremendously. I relished their wretchedness, their agony. Their torment and trauma fuelled my delight as every next pain I inflicted was bigger than the previous one. At one such instance I went too far. In my rage to destroy it all I killed my younger brother’s love..”
Callan gasped as the information shocked him.
“She was trying to save someone and was killed by accident. I regret the day.” he sighed “My father had been overlooking my mistakes for quite a long time but he was furious with me and my behaviour, while the incident added to his woes. My little brother demanded that I be harshly punished. Though unwillingly, I had to accept that.”
The demon stood from his place and took a few strides towards the edge of the cliff. He stationed himself at a parallel view from Callan but kept his gaze at the flowing water “I was banished to this realm where a mystical dome was created just to confine me in a limited area. I absolutely hated this place.” he huffed.
Callan nodded for he now understood the reason for the demons presence in this world. From what he gathered he could definitely infer that the demon derived pleasure from others pain and so he was dangerous. Even the story which was told to him described the spirit as a deadly monster who sucked in the very life essence of people. The harrowing tale of the human settlement during the war of Jodatain brought chills to his spine.
“Why did you attack people?”
“I had to..” he side glanced at the handsome man “As the days went by I was slowly loosing my shape. This realm was harming the human like figure I had.. It was slowly fading. After a few months I was nothing but a dark, shapeless floating object. To keep my external form intact I had to feed on the life sources available.”
“Was it necessary?”
“No; It was not.. I would’ve survived easily without feeding. My powers remained intact, it was only my body which suffered.” He exhaled audibly “Initially when I was confined to that limited space of woods I was chagrined. The powers of the dome created to captivate me was too much to get rid of. I was seldom allowed to visit my realm. Whenever I was back home, I wasn’t permitted a long stay. My protests, my complaints were squashed every single time and before I could realise I used to be sent to this world again.”
The demon slowly turned his torso to face the Elemental “As I’ve already told you; I loathed this place. In my anguish I killed all the animals breathing in the forest. The humans which trespassed on the lands were not supposed to be slaughtered. I could have easily lived with one sacrifice for months but those people were just unlucky to have been caught in the tornado of my fury.”
The hard and stern features of the demon dramatically softened “However, everything changed on that fateful day..”
“Which day?”
“The day that I met you..” He gave as wide a smile as he could “When you came to me as a sacrifice I wasn’t expecting you to be something more than a human. At first I felt pity for I had to devour on such a beauty but when I used my mist on you; nothing happened. You were untouched by every of my powers. It was frustrating me! I couldn’t understand it, I couldn’t understand you! All this while you kept your calm and your serene smile intact, never getting agitated neither being disgusted by me. This was something new to me. I tried to kill you a number of times in a number of ways but I failed every time..”
Callan nodded in understanding. It was obvious that the spirit was fearing the unknown and hence wanted to eliminate the source of his fright. However the fact that the loving and caring demon was once determined to kill him kept unwantedly reeling in his mind.
The demon scowled a little “I wasn’t letting it go. I wanted to show you that I was superior to you in every way. I was about to infiltrate the human settlement again but you caged me..”
Callan’s eyes widened. It was puzzling for him to know that the mighty powerful demon could be caged. But how was it possible! Even when he was confined by the powers of the locket he showed his dominance and override its powers for the past two full moons. Callan realised that to subdue the strength of the spirit a more stronger force had to come to play. Was Callan really that powerful? The realisation amazed him and yet he was fearful about himself. He looked at the man in front of him and lowered his voice a bit “How was I able to cage you?”
“The lightnings..” The demon bobbed a finger to the sky “It does something to our spirit powers. It is the reason why my people are always afraid to visit this world. The lightening can kill us. Kill me..”
In that moment Callan recalled the incident from the last full moon when lightening showed up all of a sudden in the sky and the demon thought that Callan was threatening him. Now he understood what it meant.. Who would’ve thought that the fearsome, out of the world being was not inevitable after all.
“I was completely taken aback when I saw you mastering the thing. For the first time in my entire existence I was afraid; afraid for my life!”
He looked at the man in endearment “If you wished you could have easily killed me but you didn’t do that. In fact you spared my life and spent those prison days with me.” he smiled with admiration in his eyes “The days you and I spent together were the most amazing days of my existence. You wanted to know me, you showed interest in what I liked and what I hated.” he chuckled “You were being friendly.. But your pinch of acceptance sowed the seeds of affection in me. I don’t know how or when but I was deeply in love with you..!”
The confession from Daragor brought in a bout of jitters in Callan. The way the demon looked at him right now was making him anxious. It was as if he was the brightest star in the sky, like he was the rarest of rare creatures, like he could drink him in..
Callan avoided Daragor’s gaze as he cleared his throat “Aurora told me that Zaccio..” he pursed his lips “I-I mean the previous me was drenched of his powers. You were feeding on them.”
The spirit snickered at Callan’s wit to divert the topic that unnerved him “The witch isn’t completely wrong. Your presence had brought in remarkable changes in me. I was calm, serene and stopped being a nuisance altogether. My parents came to know about this and they summoned me. I requested permission to bring in a guest. That was my biggest mistake!” He lowered his eyes in dejection.
“Why? Did your parents harm Zaccio?”
Daragor shook his head “I was persistent on taking you to my realm. The selfish me wanted to keep all of you to myself. I pretended that I wanted to show you my home and you agreed to come with me. I took advantage of your gullibility.” He exhaled a long breath.
Callan could see the guilt, the regret in Daragor’s eyes “When in my realm I tried to coerce you to stay for days, citing some or the other reasons. Although you were not happy with it, you obliged. But I could see the change in you..” his eyes became glossy “My world was not meant for you because you were disconnected with your earthly components. You were becoming weak, your life source was draining and it was all because of me..!”
Daragor swiped away the tear that was wetting his cheek “In the madness to secure you I overlooked the fact that your powers were waning. I even overlooked the fact that you lost weight at such an extent that your skin glued to your bones, the gleam in your eyes was gone. You were unable to remember things. But the stupid me..” His lips trembled as he chuckled with teary eyes “I was adamant to keep my stand. I kept telling myself that this is just a phase, that its the change of environment that was affecting you, that sooner or later you would be healthy and fine..” He paused as he looked at a sympathetic Callan.
“I was wrong..” he whispered in trepidation.
“On one such day I was worried as you did not show up in the morning. I rushed to visit you and saw you lying in a state of deep unconsciousness. I tried to wake you up but it was of no use. The healers of my world were unaware of your physiology and so they couldn’t help. Our powers and medications were all unfruitful. You were lying there all alone, heaving slow deep breaths, dying.. Just because of me!”
Callan could see the change in Daragor. His eyes were different. They were more softer than he could remember. The demon kept gawking at him but in reality he wasn’t seeing him. He kept his mouth shut but in irony the unspoken words revealed a lot. Daragor was pensive for he was remembering the past. The incident replayed in his head as if it occurred yesterday. His sorrow broke the water confines as it flowed continuously through his eyes.
The wretched state of the demon saddened Callan. He cleared his throat to bring back Daragor from his thoughts “Then you brought me back to this world.”
Daragor nodded as he sniffled “I was scared; I did not want to lose you. Your survival was everything to me at that moment even if it meant that I would not be able to see you ever. I brought you to this world hoping that your condition improves but nothing changed. It had been two days yet you remained the same. Unmoving; motionless. I was desperate to find a solution to cure you. I decided to ask for help. I cradled you in my arms and was halfway through the path when he came..”
“Orcus.”
Daragor nodded briskly “I saw the change in his features. He was confused and all of a sudden he became angry when he saw you.”
“He must’ve realised I was his mate.”
Daragor painfully smiled as he shrugged “Without thinking straight he jumped on me. He changed his form and tried to snatch you away. That is how it all started..”
Callan let out an understated sigh. His eyes were steady as he hugged himself. Though his features showed indifference from the outside he was scared from within. Callan knew what had happened next. What destruction these two beings brought upon the world. It was a battle to outshine their dominance. A battle to prove their supremacy. A war to claim their love!
Callan briskly nodded at Daragor to continue “It was all a misunderstanding. I lost my patience and he lost his brain. It was no holds barred. We fought for days over who has a right over you. Each one of us trying to get hold of the other. Trying to strangulate the other. Attempting to kill each other. The irony being that we were equally matched..”
Daragor stopped midway as he looked down to the ground, hiding his sorrowful face. Callan saw the tear drops which fell on the earth as the demon gulped. Callan felt pity for Daragor. A feeling of sympathy and care grew inside of him. He softly spoke “Look at me.”
The demon slowly raised his head as Callan witnessed the crammed water beads in his eyes. He smiled a little at Daragor cheering him up in the process. The demon sighed and gritted his teeth to gather the courage to say the rest of the words “We were in a fighting trance when the wolf all of a sudden was on his knees. He arched his back and stretched his neck to the sky. The mighty howl he bellowed was full of pain and sorrow. His body trembled while his tears and screams were unstoppable.”
He looked at Callan with a miserable heart and disconsolate eyes “It was your pain the wolf was feeling..”
Callan’s shoulder slumped as his eyes cast down in a mournful gaze. There was sadness in his heart but it was not his. It was a reflection of the sorrow buried deep down inside of the spirit. To watch your loved one suffer and die must’ve been harrowing. Callan now understood that the agony of the bereavement was what led to the carnage on the world.
There was pain inside the demon but the love in his heart exceeded that pain. There was a strange surge of acceptance, like the handsome man could trust Daragor. He felt content, he felt safe. It wasn’t like before when Callan was almost fearful for his life for he thought that the demon wanted to devour him.
“I was so stupid.” The handsome man chuckled “All those days I thought that you wanted to kill me, feed on my soul but in reality you gave me the biggest surprise of my life.”
The demon marched two steps ahead “I am saddened by the fact that you think I can harm you. Because I can’t.” he narrowed his eyes in determination “I wont be able to face you if I became the reason of your suffering. The day I hurt you will be the last day you would ever see me. ..”
“You don’t have to be so harsh on yourself..” Callan said in a low and awkward voice.
“I want you to understand this; I cant stand your tears, your sorrow. I was stupid enough to always think about me and neglect your feelings and see what it led us to! I cant bear to see you hurt again. I vowed to always make you happy. It is you who matter more to me. More than anything else, more than even me..”
An awkward silence followed as Callan was left speechless. He did not know what to say or how to respond. Those confessions turned the emotions inside of him. From weird and awkward to that of anxiousness and regret.
“I feel bad.” he pursed his lips as his heart raced a bit “Had I known that you were waiting for me I would have never indulged with anyone. I am so sorry..”
“It does not bother me.”
“W-What?” Callan stammered as the statement stupefied him.
Daragor closed the distance between Callan and him “It doesn’t matter if you don’t love me. It doesn’t matter if you have someone else in your heart. It doesn’t matter if you’ve done a million deeds wrong. Nothing you do would deter my resolve for you.” He touched the strands from Callan’s forehead and gently moved them behind his ears “All that matters to me is the content I feel when I see you smile. I want to see you happy always.” he palmed his hand on the cheek of the beautiful man. He caressed him, touched him lovingly and with gentle eyes he said “I would always look after you. I don’t expect you to love me back but I would keep loving you till the end of it..!”
Callan leaned the weight of his face on the palm of the demon. He touched the back of the palm and stroked it tenderly. At this moment Callan felt least proud about himself for he failed to be the mate Daragor deserved. The demon was ready to forgo his own happiness just to see him smile. He was ready to inflict punishment on himself if Callan desired to part ways with him.
How could someone love any person so much!
Callan was overwhelmed by the deep affection Daragor was pouring in right now. For the first time in his life he did not feel empty. It was like he had found the part of the missing puzzle of his life. The restrain in him collapsed as he could not contain himself any more. He stood from his place in a haste and embraced Daragor in a tight hug. He wept into the demon’s shoulder as he clutched the back of his shirt.
Blinking lashes with heavy tears Callan brought his mouth to the ear of Daragor and whispered “I promise to make everything right..”
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