I am Sam

SASHA

“What do you want, Sasha? Do you want me to stop?” His breath is fanning my lips, his one hand right on my hip while the other holds my wrists pinned securely up above my head against the bark of the tree behind me.

Do I?

I mean, what is this? I don’t know if Caleb is merely joking right now, pushing my buttons to see how far I’ll go, or serious about that question.

“You said that was only to replace one fucked up memory with something else,” I’m breathing, my chest rising and falling as my eyes look up at him, the dark hooded look I’m seeing in them, right now I just don’t know how to get a read on that; because this is Caleb, darkness is his middle name.

“I did say that,” He groans, “But I guess it all depends on how much you want to forget, and...” He says with a smirk as he suddenly runs the tip of his tongue from my chin, all the way up to my lips agonizingly slowly. “You taste so fucking good; sometimes, the sin of letting go is too good to pass up.” His eyes are suddenly darker than I’ve seen them before, a shiver instantly running down my spine. And letting go with Caleb would be the ultimate sin because, let’s face it, he’s dangerous, incredibly dark and twisted in so many ways.

A dark grin creeps up at the corners of his mouth when he suddenly dips down to kiss me again, but the rational part of my brain that’s connected to the soul of my heart instantly kicks in. I pull my hand free as I cup it over his mouth just as his lips are about to collide with mine, and he stops, his eyes searching mine, dark and commanding. Swallowing hard, I’m the one holding his eyes hostage this time when I speak;

“I know what you’re doing; we’re both pretty messed up right now, me with Atlas, you with Eris. But, I think you're forgetting something.” And I watch as his brows furrow questioningly, “Wolf.”

There’s a sudden twitch in his eye when he slowly moves my hand away from his lips, still keeping my gaze; he doesn’t look away,

“You really love him that much?” Smirking, I’m suddenly biting my bottom lip as I raise a challenging brow at him,

“Love... That word doesn’t even come close to explaining how he makes me feel; I would kill for him, die for him. And he doesn’t deserve this.” Swallowing hard, Caleb suddenly smirks as his eyes lower to my lips,

“I wish I knew what that felt like, that kind of loyalty.” A small smile suddenly has me gently touching his cheek,

“You could, with Eris. But you would have to get past what she did,” Swallowing a heavy lump, his brows suddenly pull together, his jaw clenching tight as he shakes his head,

“Never, I’ll never forgive her for what she did. All of this, everything that’s broken in this place, it’s all on her...”

“But it’s fate, she's yours.” Scoffing, he narrows his eyes at me,

“Fate is a very weighty word to throw around before breakfast.” He grumbles, but I’ve stopped listening to him; I suddenly can’t move, can’t think; I’m frozen in place as I stare out past Caleb over his shoulder into the distance of the trees. My breathing suddenly picks up shakily as my grip on his shoulder tightens, and Caleb instantly picks up on it; his whole body stiffens as he brings his mouth close to my ear,

“How many?” Gulping my brows furrow as I keep looking out towards the trees, my eyes frozen on a pair of black eyes staring straight at me when I whisper,

“One.”

It’s the same Unseelie creature I saw that day on the bridge; he’s staring straight at me, half hidden amongst the thicket. His body is covered in white caked-looking clay. But his eyes, it’s like I can’t look away even if I wanted to, black voids of darkness that seem to be swallowing me whole.

I’m petrified.

“Close your eyes,” Caleb mumbles against my ear, but I can’t; I can’t look away. “Close your fucking eyes, Sasha!” He suddenly shouts, and I instantly shut my eyes with a loud gasp as my body tenses. The earth beneath us shakes, vibrating through my entire body as loud noises of tree barks snapping, echoing into the forest and leaves rustling vigorously have me suddenly holding onto Caleb so tightly that my knuckles are going white.

As quickly as it starts, it ends, and the forest is suddenly quiet. I still have my eyes shut tight when Caleb suddenly whispers, “You can open them now,” The moment I do, I gasp out in shock as my eyes widen at what I’m seeing. We’re completely surrounded by thorny bushes, and the entire forest around us plummeted into a darkened mist. The thorns are so thick, long and sharp. One, only a few inches from my face, lifting my hand up from his shoulder, I’m suddenly touching the short end of the thorn with my fingertip, instantly wincing the moment a drop of blood starts running down my finger. And within an instant, the thorns begin retracting, opening up and revealing the forest again. Turning my head to look at Caleb, I’m suddenly startled by the sharp thorns sticking out of his body; gasping in panic, I quickly realize that the thorns aren’t piercing through his skin; they’re coming from his skin. The one that pricked my finger came from his body, not the trees.

The moment the thorns retract completely, he opens his eyes and turns to look at me; his gaze is demanding, intense and threatening. But it quickly shifts the moment his eyes land on mine; he doesn’t speak. Instead, he pulls away, grabs my hand and starts pulling me back toward the castle. A few steps in, and I suddenly can’t wait any longer; I need to know what’s going on; why is the same Unseelie creature from the bridge in the forest now?

“Caleb,” But he doesn’t respond. Instead, his hold around my hand only tightens as he keeps pulling me along with him, “Caleb!” But still, nothing; suddenly annoyed, I yank my hand free as I stand staring at him in annoyance; he instantly stops as he turns to give me a hard stare, “What the hell was that back there?” I blurt out as I point back towards the direction we just came.

“What, the thorns? It’s pretty cool, huh? Now come, let’s get you back to the castle.” He shrugs nonchalantly like we didn’t just go through anything insane back there.

“No, not the thorns,” I scoff irritably, “Even though that was pretty cool and terrifying all at the same time. I’m talking about the creature back there; it’s the same one I saw a few days ago on the bridge.” Narrowing his eyes, Caleb suddenly steps up to me, and he stares down at me.

“That same Unseelie has been hovering around the castle for the past three days; there aren’t any others, just him.” Furrowing my brows, I’m suddenly crossing my arms around my chest,

“What does he want?” Smirking, Caleb shakes his head at me,

“It... Unseelie creatures are not a he or she; that thing that monster is called an it. Don’t make the mistake of thinking about it being like you or me.” Scoffing, I’m suddenly shrugging,

“Okay fine, so what did it want?”

“That’s a fascinating question, Sasha. Because it was in our part of the forest, not the Seelie side, which means that it crossed the river to enter our forest without me noticing.”

“Well, you kinda had your tongue down my throat, so you were sort of distracted.” Smirking Caleb suddenly rolls his eyes at me,

“You know, you’re a real pain in the ass.”

“So I’ve been told.” I retort, rolling my eyes, “Stop changing the subject; why was that thing back there, staring at us like some freaky stalker?”

“Was it looking at you or me?”

“What?”

“You heard me, was it looking at me, or was it looking at you?”

“What does it matter?”

“Oh, it matters, you see, we were in the forest, the castle is unprotected, the guards can only give so much protection, and instead of trying to get into the castle like it has been trying to do for the past three days, it decided to watch us, so I ask you again, who was it staring at?”

I suddenly have a very unsettling feeling bubbling to the surface as my stomach turns into uneasy knots,

“Me. It was staring straight at me.” Caleb’s eyes suddenly narrow, his jaw tightening before grabbing my hand.

“Castle, now.”

And with that, he gives no room for debate as he starts pulling me with him, and I’m instantly feeling a strange feeling of panic in my chest.

Why was this creature looking at me?”

~

“I’m not sleeping in your room.” I’m suddenly retorting as my brows furrow,

“Sleeping? No, you’re staying in my room until I get back.”

“Back? Back from where?”

“I’m going back into the forest to track down that creature,”

“I’ll go with you.”

“No!” He suddenly shouts at me, which instantly has me gasping and stepping back in response. Sighing, Caleb closes his eyes for just a moment before looking back at me,

“If that thing is watching you, then I don’t need you going anywhere near the forest right now.”

“That’s ridiculous; you don’t even know that it was watching me. And wouldn’t I be safer with you in the forest than stuck in the castle?”

“This isn’t up for discussion; you’re staying in my room until I get back.”

“You can’t tell me what to do.” I suddenly want to push past him when he grips me by my throat and shoves me back hard against the wall,

“Stop testing me.” He grumbles, his eyes suddenly menacing.

“Or what, you gonna kiss me again?” I respond narrowing my eyes defiantly. Smirking, he cocks a challenging brow at me,

“No, that was a once-off thing. Now stay here like a good little girl until I get back.”

“And do what exactly? I can’t just sit here.” Letting go of me, he suddenly turns around and starts walking towards a table resting against a wall. Picking up a sketch pad and some pencils, he turns back and tosses them onto his bed.

“Draw.” My brows furrow in response,

“Draw?”

“Yes, draw. I’ll post two guards outside my door, but you shouldn’t need them.”

“Two guards, really. And they’re meant to do what exactly?”

Cocking a menacing brow at me, he suddenly smirks at me,

“Keep you in.”

I’m about to say something when he leaves, he's out the door shutting it behind him. Just as I’m about to grab for the door handle, I suddenly take a step back the moment thorny branches begin growing out of his door, covering the entire area and caging me in.

“Caleb!” I suddenly shout out,

“Draw, Sasha, I’ll be back soon.” He shouts back, and I can literally hear the smirk as he walks away.

Turning around, I’m so pissed right now I could scream; plonking myself on his bed, I grab the sketch pad and pencils; I’m about to fling them across the air when my eyes suddenly land on a wall. It’s behind the table Caleb got the sketch pad and pencils from; it’s covered in sketches. And as my brows furrow, I’m suddenly blown away; they’re really, really good. I mean dark and scary but good. Wow, Caleb is an artist.

I can see the darkness in the pictures he draws, the pain he walks around with portrayed in the things he sketches. Some of them make no sense to any average person; these sketches would scare the shit out of them, Noah’s words ringing back in my head about Caleb being a psychopath, maybe he is, just a little. One picture, in particular, stands out, and I was expecting it to be one of Cole, but it isn’t; it’s a portrait sketch of Eris. She’s looking down, and it’s the most vulnerable, bare and exposed picture I’ve ever seen of someone. Smirking, I’m suddenly biting down against my lower lip; Caleb can try and deny it all he likes; I don’t think he hates her as much as he tries to let on.

~

Caleb

When I get back to my room, I’m so fucking irritated, only to find Sasha fast asleep on my bed, smirking. I slowly make my way over to her when I suddenly notice all the sketches around her spread across the bed. Looking at one, I lift it and hold it for closer inspection; the girl can draw, that’s for sure. But my brow furrows at the drawing; it must be of the creature she’d seen hiding among the trees today, scary looking fucker. Dropping it to the bed, I pick up another picture, my brows drawing when I swallow hard; it’s me.

Is this how she sees me? It’s not bad, just fucking sad. Are my eyes really that broken, that lost and distant? Scoffing, I drop it to the bed and look over at her, she sees a lot more than she lets on, and that fact scares the shit out of me.

Going to pick up one more picture; there’s something that suddenly aches inside of me, which catches me off guard; it’s not because of who she drew; trust me, I’m not into her wolf mate; it’s more the way she drew him. Sasha puts a lot of emphasis on the eyes. In this drawing, it’s as if I can see the very soul of the man staring back at me, looking down at her still sleeping form; I suddenly wish someone looked at me the way Sasha looks at her wolf mate.

But that’s stupid, right?