Heritage

I don’t know my real birthday. So we all decided to mark the day that I turned up at the orphanage to be my birthday, like all the other orphans. When it was someone’s birthday, the nuns would go out specially to buy ingredients to make a birthday cake. They could only afford to go shopping once a week so there were a lot of joint birthdays. Every child looked forward to eating a slice of their birthday cake and blowing out candles then receiving the presents we all saved up to buy for them. I was different. I didn’t eat my birthday cake. It’s not that I didn’t like it. I just didn’t want to. I didn’t like the candles on the cake either, even the smallest of flames made me remember my nightmares. The presents I got from the children were things like flowers and small sweets that we get after we’ve been on our best behaviour. Flowers didn’t last very long and I normally gave back the sweets because I didn’t want them. It was one of the hardest tasks to find a suitable birthday present to give to me. I would tell them to not give me presents but the nuns insisted that because I found presents for the other children, I deserved some too.

It’s been five years since Zack’s adopted me and it’s my fifteenth birthday today. On the other birthdays, things were different. Zack would wake me up after I had gone and done my meditation session, tell me to get dressed into the clothes he picked for me and to brush my hair so my elf ears were concealed. When I would do all those things, I would come down in the uncomfortable clothes and see that Zack had prepared lots of presents for me and there were lots of children there. We would play games, not the games I would play with the other children on their birthdays, like pin the tail on the donkey, Zack prepared games that were more expensive, like pass the parcel. Zack made sure that I always won. Birthdays had never been so boring.

Zack also prepared a large birthday cake for me, covered in candles and would push me to blow them out. The first time, I ran off, terrified of the tiny little flames that danced upon the pink wax candles. Even the tiniest flame could cause a forest fire. Zack scolded me for being so childish, even if I was only eleven years old. The second, third and fourth time, I just simply refused and one of the other children would blow them out. Zack would scold me again, saying that it was my birthday, I should blow the candles out. But I couldn’t bear being in the same room as those tiny, almost insignificant looking candles.

I didn’t enjoy the company of the children Zack invited over either. They would sit around me like I was a princess and asking what it was like to live in a large house. They asked what music I liked, what television programmes I liked or what was it like to not go to school, questions I found that couldn’t answer much to. They saw me like a freak in a circus show, as if I belong behind bars instead of amongst them. The difference between the children here and the children at the orphanage was that the children at the orphanage were more sympathetic. They weren’t as spoilt as these children. I wish they could have come here and seen the house and tasted the food which I’m sure they would have loved.

My fifteenth birthday was a bit different to my other birthdays. Zack had been talking about it all month, like he did every year, but he said that this birthday was going to be special. I didn’t know what he meant until one evening when he stole all of my kimonos and demanded that I wore this dress that was covered in sequins and started teaching me how to apply make-up to myself. In all honesty, the cosmetics felt sticky and horrible, clinging onto my skin and feeling itchy. I wanted to take it off, but Zack was pushing me down the stairs when he managed to get the dress on me. The dress was starting to ride up, it was so short that it barely reached the middle of my thighs.

But as we reached the living room, I first noticed that it was quiet. There was no children shouting and chattering excitedly. I slowly lifted my head and jumped. The living room was full of boys who were older and staring at me. Green eyes, blue eyes, brown eyes, so many eyes, just staring at me. They roamed my body and I felt naked, even though I was wearing clothes and my face was covered in this make-up. I felt sick, exposed, I didn’t want anyone to see me. I backed out of sight, placing a hand on my heart in a feeble attempt to calm it down. Zack came out of the living room and a tired sigh.

“Zelda, don’t be rude,” he said and folded his arms.

“Why…why…?” I couldn’t speak. I was so scared. There were so many boys, there weren’t any girls! Where were the girls?!

“Zelda, come and say hello.”

“Don’t…don’t…” Please, don’t make me go in there again. I don’t like being stared at and having so little on at the same time. I want to have some girls around so I’m a little bit more comfortable.

“Come on, Zelda. They all want to meet you.”

Zack grabbed my hand and dragged me back into the living room. He sat me down on the sofa and then left me alone in the sea of boys. Don’t get me wrong, they weren’t bad looking. But there were so many of them! They were smiling but they looked so scary. Their eyes sparkling in the light and I felt like a deer surrounded by Careem wolves.

Careem wolves are a type of wolf that lived in the southern hemisphere. They are known for their eyes glimmering like cats. It is said that the last thing you will see if you’re being attacked by a Careem wolf is the gleam in its eyes. Careem wolves normally work in packs so you’d be torn apart very quickly because of how aggressive and strong they are. Nowadays, they’re rare because so many hunters kill them. Careem wolves are beautiful but humans see them as nothing more than pests. Careem wolf number one sat next to me and grinned.

“My name is Keith,” he introduced himself “I’m honoured to meet you.” He took my hand and pecked it.

“…” I held my tongue. What would I say? Anything I might say could offend these…boys and make Zack annoyed and angry at me. Annoyed and angry Zack meant that he might hold my kimonos hostage longer and I wouldn’t be able to meditate without my precious kimonos or the spirit woman will cane my hand. Yes, she did it. It didn’t scar but it did hurt.

“My name is Justin,” another wolf sat on the armrest of the sofa and ran his fingers through my hair “Your hair is very smooth and silky. What do you use to wash it?”

“…” I wanted to point out that I was an elf, I didn’t need human products to keep myself looking beautiful. The spirit woman gave me recipes to making lotions and juices that worked on elves and making us healthy more than look good. Keith began admiring my skin while a pile of presents began forming on the coffee table.

“Open my present first, Zelda,” one wolf placed a small flat box on my lap. I stared at the shiny purple wrapping paper before slowly pulling it apart to see a smooth navy box underneath. I sensed all the gleaming eyes focused on me as I opened the box to see a glittering necklace inside.

“…Oh…” I flinched when I felt the anticipation in the air. “…Wow…” My voice nearly cracked.

“Let me put it on you!” A pair of hands grabbed the necklace and placed it around my neck. I flinched as the cold constricting piece of jewellery closed in on around my neck. I got a lot of jewellery and clothes for my presents. I endured the stares, the smiles, the touches until it got too much when someone’s hand found itself on my thigh.

“Get off me!” I ran. I ran through the sea of wolves. I ran out of the living room. I ran upstairs. I ran into the attic. And I ran straight through her, the spirit woman.

“Zelda, what have you done to yourself?” she demanded snappily as she turned to face me. I saw her face soften when I looked up at her and I realised I was crying. In a rather pathetic fashion. The mascara that Zack applied onto me was waterproof so it wasn’t running. But I felt awful. I didn’t want this make-up on. I didn’t want to expose so much skin in this stupid dress. And I certainly didn’t want this thing that humans called a necklace! I grabbed the silver boa constrictor around my neck and tore it off, casting it aside. The spirit woman came up to me and reached out, stroking my cheek.

“Help me,” I whispered. So she took me to the garden and I picked the plants that she wanted, put them into a wooden bowl she had in the attic, mashed and added water. Then I wiped the paste over my face like she instructed me to and used water to get it off. I saw my reflection in one of the cracked mirrors and saw that all the make-up Zack had put on me had come off.

“Do you know why human females put make-up on?” the spirit woman asked and I shook my head “To show that they’re sexually available. They make their cheeks flushed and their eyes big, both are actions that the human body does when it’s sexually active. Humans are vulgar, they always want sex.”

“…Why?” I dared ask.

“They engage in intimate activities because of the endorphins that are released when they engage in such vile acts,” the woman scoffed.

“I’m sure not all of them…”

“Most of them. It’s true that some humans maintain the decency to follow the less vulgar views of sexual intercourse. But the human mind is easily swayed, easily controlled.” She showed me a purple kimono and I wasted no time to get the dress off and step into it, snuggling into the silk. “Zack is using you, Zelda. He’s exploiting you for your looks and he plans to marry you to one of those boys to benefit financially.”

“Why?” I asked again “Why are humans like that?”

“Humans are greedy. They are easily blinded.”

“Zelda!” I could have had a heart attack when I heard Zack. He sounded so angry. I was so afraid that I felt my eyes watering and the spirit woman gave me a sympathetic look.

“Have courage, my child. He is just a human.”

“But he’s stronger.”

“He won’t be forever, Zelda.”

“Zelda!” The spirit woman disappeared when the door slammed open and I felt my heart throb painfully when I heard Zack’s heavy footsteps cross the floor. I looked up into his flaring eyes as he put on a fake smile. “Why don’t you change into something suitable and go back downstairs to play games with everyone else?” I counted to myself in my head and took a deep breath.

“No.”

“What?”

“I want girls around if I am to go back down there again.”

“Zelda, don’t be ridiculous.” I felt myself get angry, like I normally did when Zack scoffed at my words, as if what I had to say wasn’t important. This man was supposed to be my brother? He is a poor actor.

“Someone placed his hand on my thigh and I felt uncomfortable with it.”

“Please stop being so pathetic, Zelda. It was only for a bit of a play around.” I don’t want any more ‘playing around’.

“I want to go to bed.”

“Alright then!” Zack raised his voice “Go to bed then! I arranged this birthday party especially for you so you could meet some nice boys, perhaps get a nice boyfriend!”

“I don’t want a boyfriend,” I said simply “I am too young.”

“Too young? You’re fifteen! There are elf girls like you out there that are betrothed to a stranger on the day of their birth! Here I am, giving you a choice and giving you the chance to get to know these boys! How dare you be so ungrateful towards me!” I bit my tongue and walked past him.

“Those girls are given a chance to get to know the man they are betrothed to for twenty years,” I said as I looked at him over my shoulder “They are then given the choice in whether they’d like to marry that man or not on the day of the wedding.” I managed to give him my fiercest glare that I could possibly muster. “If you are going to try to guilt trip me, Zack, then I suggest you do some proper research.” I could see the spirit woman hovering behind Zack with a satisfied smile on her face and I felt a smile creeping onto my face.

“How would you know about how elves court?” he asked suspiciously and I stuck my nose up at him.

“I keep any eye on my heritage,” I answered coolly.

“Zelda, the elves are near to the point of extinction, don’t bother. The age of humans is coming and you must do whatever you can to survive.” I felt worried as a shocked look slowly crept onto the woman’s face and she disappeared. I bit my lip and shrugged.

“We’ll see,” I said and walked off back to my room.

That night, I had more nightmares. The flames surrounding me, burning my skin and making me scream for help. I couldn’t see anyone past the flames, but I could see shadows. I tried to walk towards them but flaming beams from the ceiling fell and landed in between us. I stumble back, I knew I was crying but the heat of the flames made my tears evaporate. I looked everywhere and saw an open door. Without much thought, I ran out, I ran out into the night. I was in a forest and I could hear screams of agony. I turned to see more flames and I heard the snort of a horse.

I turned again and saw the glint of metal in the moonlight. I ran again, through the forest. My feet hurt, my hands hurt and my eyes burned when they couldn’t shed any more tears. I heard galloping behind me but I still ran, even if it was futile to outrun a horse. Brambles pricked my feet and I still ran. Branches held my hair back but I tugged it out, ignoring the pain that my head felt. Bushes tore my kimono, leaving a trail of silken shreds. I still ran. And then I crashed into someone. So I screamed and tried to break free from the person’s iron grip.

“It’s alright,” someone said “Ssh.”

I woke up, gasping and sweating. I sat up and held the blankets close to me, staring ahead at the bookcase on the opposite side of the room. A good book will cheer me up. I jumped out of bed and jogged over to the bookcase, running a finger along the choice of books I had. I often chose books about fantasy tales, I love exploring another world that was created by someone else. They create creatures and characters that I want to get to know better and I find the whole thing exhilarating, even if it is all fake.

I chose my favourite book, ‘A Sacrifice for a Stranger’. It was my favourite because I admired the character and how she would willingly give up her position as a duchess to help a common person who’s a stranger that she met at a market. The effect of her sacrifice caused her whole house to fall and a new and better parliament to form within the city she lived in. If only I was brave enough to take such risks, but the opportunity hasn’t come up yet. What would I risk to do and for what?

Staring outside after reading the first few pages, I began thinking about why was I here. Zack adopted me but he never gave me the truth about why. He claims to be my brother but what kind of brother would bully his sister into habits of another race? He is clearly a human and he doesn’t look anything like me. But do I dare confront him? I had some freedom with being able to meditate, wearing my kimonos and reading despite Zack telling me that women shouldn’t really read. I began worrying about different scenarios about losing more freedom if I dared to accuse Zack of not being my brother so I decided to take a walk in the garden.

The cool night air was the cleanest at this point. Most humans would be drunk and asleep by now and there was little pollution in the air. At the far back in the garden, there were several patches of flowers that I often nurtured in my free time. I knelt by the beautiful Pengrelias and breathed in their aroma. I stroked their long violet petals thoughtfully and sighed.

“Up so early, Zelda?” I turned my head and saw the woman hovering beside me and nodded. “Would you like me to teach you how to make perfumes?”

“Elves…make perfumes?” I said uncertainly.

“We invented them. Perfumes are very useful to help younger elves cope with changing homes.” I looked up at her and stood.

“I would very much love to learn how to make perfumes,” I said. Perhaps the perfumes would help me cope with this home. Even after five years, I hated my surroundings. But five years for an elf is almost like a blink of the eye because of our immortality. The spirit woman gave me a warm smile and gestured to the Pengrelias.

“Take five of them, five red roses, two vanilla pods and a cupful of water then meet me in the attic.”

By the morning, my room was filled with the alluring scent of Pengrelias, vanilla and roses which eased my body into full relaxation. I lay in my bed after the morning meditation and drifted off to sleep. I began dreaming of a meadow and picking flowers to weave into my hair. I felt at peace at last and began chasing butterflies around the meadow. I felt happy, no flames, no heat and no distress.

“Zelda, it’s time to go home.” When I turned my head, I saw two figures towering over me, one of them picked me up. I was hugged and that made me wake up. I sat up and Zack came in at the same time with my breakfast.

“Hey, Zelda!” he smiled “You’re using Dune’s perfume, are you?” He took in a deep breath. “Isn’t it a nice scent?” I bit my lip and just smiled a secret smile, nodding. I’ll play along for now.