: Chapter 37
in this hotel room with the space to be wild in love, the freedom to be ourselves.
I lean up onto my knees between his thighs as our kiss continues, our lips and tongues moving together flawlessly, showcasing our desire, our uncontrolled need for one another.
“I love you, Cole,” he whispers between kisses. “I love you with everything I am.”
“I know.” I wince my eyes, feeling every bit of that love. “I know you do.”
Our emotions from the heavy topic have turned into passion. I want to erase his bad memories by providing new ones filled with my love for him and who he is. I want him to feel wanted like he never has before, want him to feel needed the way he is.
My hands travel from his knees, up his thighs, as he holds my face to his, kissing me softly with his pillowy lips.
I grab for the hem of his t-shirt and slip my hands beneath it, feeling his hard, warm abdomen against the tips of my fingers. He drops his hands, reaching behind him, and takes his shirt off in one swift pull.
I litter his chest with soft, wet kisses, gently trailing my tongue down the deep cuts of his muscles that lead towards the tented area beneath his sweats.
“I want to kiss you,” I whisper against his skin. “Everywhere.”
His mouth drops open as he plants his hands behind him on the bed, watching me with submissive eyes.
I pull at his sweatpants, stretching the elastic out as I reach inside to find him fully erect inside his boxers. I flush at the discovery that our kiss excites him as much as it does me.
He hisses as I palm the base of his growing length.
“Ah, Cole,” he whispers in a hoarse tone.
I gaze up into his eye before angling his cock to my mouth. I softly kiss the tip, then drag my lips down to the base. His legs stretch out, his heels digging into the floor as I lick up the side of his velvety shaft, my tongue traveling over the veins shooting up along its length.
He falls back onto his elbows, groaning up at the ceiling as I begin slowly sucking, taking him into my mouth deeper and deeper until I take as much as possible, wetting every inch of him.
“Can I, ugh…” He stalls with a breathy groan. “Can I touch you?”
I nod, keeping him deep in my mouth.
My saliva wetting his shaft allows for my hands to effortlessly glide over the rest of him. He takes one of his hands and gently scoops up my hair, holding tightly as he bobs my head, showing me what he likes.
“Fuck, Cole, you’re so good at this.”
Hearing him give me praise makes me want to do more to drive him wild. I give him my throat as he pulls my hair tightly, holding me in place while he drives into me madly.
After a minute of letting him take control, I choke on this length and need to push back to stop him in order to catch my breath.
“Shit, baby, I’m sorry,” he says quickly, leaning forward to cup my face.
“No,” I shake my head, taking a breath before swallowing. “No, I like it.”
“You like it?” he asks with a cocked brow and a curious grin pulling at his lips.
“Yeah.” I look up at him, my lips wet and swollen from use. “It excites me.’
He stares at me for a minute, almost in disbelief.
“Show me,” he demands.
He helps me up off the floor, laying me down with my back now on the bed. Pulling my sweatpants down, I’m left in my thong and oversized t-shirt. Yeah, I didn’t exactly plan a super sexy outfit, given the circumstances, but he doesn’t seem to mind.
With my bottom on the edge of the bed, he kneels down where I was. His hand runs over my stomach, slowly dragging it up under my shirt and over my bra while his eyes stay focused on my face. His thumb flicks over the sensitive nipple, making me arch up into it.
The fingers of his other hand lace through the front of my underwear, pulling them to the side. I feel slightly exposed and vulnerable with his face literally right there, inches away from my wet and eager sex.
He takes both hands, spreading my milky thighs wide, before sliding his finger along my pooling arousal.
“Jesus, you do love it.”
He groans at the sight of me bare before him as he dips his head between my legs, making me gasp at the feeling of his tongue on me, his hair tickling my thighs. The sensation of his warm, wet mouth paired with the cool feeling of the metal ring in his lip is sending me into blissful overdrive. His expert tongue licks the length of me, lapping up everything I have to offer him. I clutch the sheets in my hand, the other gripping the hair at the top of his head, my eyes rolling into the back of my head as he continues the beautiful torment.
Gently sucking my clit between his lips, he inserts two fingers, causing me to cry out. He massages his fingers into me while flicking his tongue in all the right places. I moan and writhe beneath his touch as the amazing sensation begins to build.
“Cam, stop, I’m gonna…”
“Come,” he answers for me in a demanding tone. “Come, and then do it again.”
I lose all sense of control, submitting to his tongue, and let go around his fingers, squeezing onto them internally, feeling the pulsating wave of pleasure roll through my core as I orgasm. His relentless tongue continues until I’m begging him to stop the sweet, sensitive torture of it all.
I’m completely out of breath, numb in the face as I try to keep my eyes open enough to see him above me.
“You’re so beautiful when you let go,” he says before dipping down and kissing my neck.
My breathing regulates as I cup the back of his head, my fingers threading through his hair as he licks and sucks the side of my neck, hovering above me. His hand cups my breast as he groans into my neck, toying with the nipple.
“God, you’re perfect and don’t even know it,” he whispers before finding my achingly erect nipple with his lips.
He sucks on the soft tissue, dragging his teeth lightly before pulling back and releasing it. He swirls his tongue around it, repeating the same motion as I moan at the pleasure it brings me. How I can be ready for more is beyond me, but it just never ends with him. The more I get, the more I need.
I reach down with my other hand, finding his painfully stiff erection in need of his own release.
“Come here,” I whisper, backing up.
We settle ourselves in the middle of the bed as we remove the rest of our clothing. He falls between my thighs again, his arms bracing around me as he gazes into me.
“Show me your scars, Cameron,” I say while my fingers caress his cheekbone. “Let me be the one to see them all.”
The energy shifts as his eyes grow serious, his lips hovering above mine. The overabundant need to prove that our love is real and right has never been more our mission.
“Fuck, I love you,” he breathes, gazing back and forth between my eyes.
He closes the space between us, his lips gliding across my lips, then rests his head on mine as he pushes himself into me in one swift motion. My back arches as I gasp, accepting him into my walls.
He’s so ready, so achingly present with me in this moment, so in need of everything I can offer him, and I’ve never been more alive because of it.
I close my eyes tightly as my arms wrap up and under his, holding onto his shoulders for support as he drives into me.
“Open your eyes,” he demands, grabbing my chin with his thumb and forefinger.
I open my eyes to see him above me—his broad, tattooed chest, his hair hanging, just barely obstructing his vision. I peer down at his rippled abdomen to the place where we connect. I watch his muscles flex as he thrusts himself into me, the base of his shaft shiny from the aftermath of my orgasm still dripping from me onto him.
He presses his thumb against my bottom lip until I part my mouth so he can pop it in. Placing it on my tongue, I do what I know turns him on; I suck on his finger as he continues pummeling into me; the force becoming stronger now.
“I love being inside you, everywhere.” He groans, the sounds of our skin slapping against each other filling the room.
I feel the tightening start up again, the most beautiful, tingly sensation that climbs up my spine.
“Cam,” I warn, gripping his flexed arms.
“You’re close,” he states knowingly, slowing his motions. “I’m close too.”
He lays his weight on me, then rolls so we are both on our sides, still connected. He wraps my thigh around his hip as our movements turn into a slow and steady speed. I cup the side of his neck with my palm as he finds my lips, massaging his tongue along mine while his thrusts keep delivering electrical waves of pleasure.
We rest our heads together, gazing into each other’s eyes, feeling the immense love pouring out of one another.
“Oh, Cam, I love you,” I cry out as he studies me, his thrusts becoming stronger now. “I need you. God, I love you.”
“I just can’t get close enough,” he says, driving deeply into me until he’s filled me completely, stalling to stir himself, reaching the deepest part of me. “It’s just never enough.”
His hands scour my body, his fingers clawing into the flesh of my thigh on his hip, the deep groans leaving him telling me he’s losing control.
“Tell me it’ll always be us,” he whispers against my lips.
I moan against him before opening my mouth for a kiss, capturing his lips, my kiss answering before I do. “Always, forever.”
We stay locked in our kiss as he powers into me, the cries from my mouth muffled by his lips against mine. I lose myself to the electrifying sensation, my sex rippling with pleasure, my body convulsing as I feel myself squeeze around him, pulling everything I can from the experience.
His groans intensify at my orgasm, and with a few more thrusts, he releases himself into me as his fingers dig into my back, holding me firmly to him while he fills me. He shudders as his chest heaves before his head falls back against the bed with his eyes closed.
A grin toys with the corner of my lips, watching him come down from the ultimate high, the one he’s always searched for but couldn’t find, the one thing that seems to numb him while simultaneously making him feel exhilarated and alive.
His eyes open, seeing my tender face above him. I run the backs of my fingers along the side of his face as his hand cups my neck, his thumb running along my bottom lip.
“You know I can’t live without you now,” he states softly.
The seriousness in his eyes tells me it’s more than true, almost terrifyingly so. It’s only terrifying because I understand it completely. I don’t know how I’d ever survive another day if I didn’t have him here, in the flesh, with me. The thought alone makes me feel a dejection I’ve never known.
“You’re my calm in the soul, crazy in the flesh,” I utter the words of my favorite poet to him again, this time with him conscious.
His smile widens at the poem, his face seemingly nervous at the mention of it as he toys with his lip ring.
“What? Why are you looking like that?” I ask, getting all self-conscious for actually saying it out loud.
He looks down at his chest between us, then back into my eyes. It’s then that I see it.
The words inked onto his skin, across his chest. It’s barely visible between all the other tattoos, but there it is. Etched onto him, over his heart.
I touch the words, my mouth dropping open in confusion.
“What? When? How?”
“I heard you that morning. You whispered the words into my ear when you thought I was asleep, and I knew then that you loved me in the same crazy, uncontrollable way that I love you. When I left that morning to get your car fixed, I stopped at my guy’s shop. Knew I needed it on me, forever.”
“Seriously?” I’m in total shock.
How did I not see it until now? How could I not have known he heard me? My insides stir with a deep, understood love.
“You wanted me to show you my scars? Well, you’re covering them, Cole. All of them.”
The pressure gripping my heart is a feeling unmatched. He inked me into his story even before knowing if I’d stay, needing to permanently cement something he couldn’t believe for himself was real.
But it is real. All of this.
Us.