Forgot To Tell You Something: An Angsty, Later in Life Romance

“Spill it, Lu.” Stefani pushes a cup of tea under my nose, a wry smirk on her lips. “You were all smiles when you left here yesterday, but today, you’re a scowly puss again.”

I lift the lid off the tea and take a sip of the scalding liquid. It may remove the top layer of skin inside my mouth, but at least it buys me a few minutes to figure out how to explain the last twenty-four hours. “Shit, that’s hot.”

“It’s supposed to be hot. Stop avoiding the question.”

“I’m sure you know that Owen is aware of my hitchhiker. I’m also certain that you were behind his sudden need for me to fill in for a surgical tech in the cath lab.”

“I didn’t have to tell him. He knew.” Stefani shrugs, offering a droll grin. “He had to force your hand when he heard that you were considering relocation. He looked distraught over the idea of you leaving Florida. See? It all worked out.”

“But it didn’t. Here’s what you didn’t see. He said all the right things and swore he would be there—knee deep in diapers and formula. He even promised me a wonderful, romantic evening.”

Stefani rubs her hands with devilish glee. “Ooh, give me the details.”

“Not much to tell. He never showed.”

“What the hell?”

“I’ll give you one guess, and her name begins with C, but I have my own C-word nickname for her. She called some last-minute meeting crap that he had to attend, and once again, I took a backseat.”

My friend wraps her arm around my shoulder, giving it a reassuring hug. “He’s been so busy lately, but I truly don’t think there’s anything between him and Charlotte. At least not from his end.”

I shrug, remembering to blow on the tea before scorching my intestinal tract again. “They might not be riding the hobby horse, but there’s definitely something there. For a man who has no time on his hands, he finds extra hours for Charlotte.” I rub my hand over my eyes.

I will not cry. I will not cry. Tear ducts, I’ll make you a deal. Let me reach the privacy of my office and then you can go nuts. Fair enough?

“I’m sorry, Lu.”

“If discovering that you’re going to be a Dad isn’t enough to free up time in your schedule, I don’t know what is.” I clear my throat and push myself away from the counter. “I’ll be in my office if you need me.”

“I’ll go with you to the sonogram today.”

I reach over, squeezing her hand. “A little bird told me that someone is having dinner with Dan tonight.”

“I can cancel.”

“Don’t you dare. I want all the dirty details tomorrow morning.” I rest my hand on my stomach, feeling lonelier than I have in years. “I’ll be fine on my own.”

I make it to my office, leaning against the door and blinking away the tears. The truth? I’m far from fine, but I have limited choices. I know that Owen will kick in funds, should the need arise, but I would sooner walk over hot coals than ask him for a cent. Besides, since my Dad passed, I have enough money to eke out a life for me and the baby. It might not consist of private jets and Caribbean villas, but it will be a life of love.

I’m not in my chair five minutes when the door opens. I swear, I really need to keep the damn thing locked.

Owen pokes his head in, a rueful smile on his face. “Morning, beautiful.”

“Good morning, Dr. Stevens,” I manage with a forced brightness.

I expect him to linger in the doorway or settle into the chair opposite my desk. Wrong on both counts. I take brief notice of the flowers and coffee in his hands before he sets them down, closing the distance between us and pressing his mouth against mine.

What fresh hell is this nonsense?

I pull back, resting my hands against his chest to put some space between us. Hell, there are miles of emotional space already. “What are you doing?”

“Giving the woman I love a kiss good morning.”

I shift my eyes to the floor, releasing a heavy sigh. “Can you give me some space, please?”

I’m not sure if it’s the dead look in my gaze or the flat tone of my words, but he obliges my request without argument, settling into the corner chair. Granted, since my office is the size of a shoebox, he’s still within petting distance. “I’m sorry. I just miss you, Tally.”

Wrong thing to say, buddy. “You miss me? Hmm.”

“What’s that mean?”

I could play dumb, but I’ve been turning a blind eye long enough. “It means that I highly doubt the words coming out of your mouth.” Even if it is the most kissable mouth on the damn planet.

Owen hands me the flowers, nodding at the coffee. “I feel terrible about last night.”

“Do you?” I volley back, my hands not moving to accept his offering. “Is that what the flowers are for?”

Owen looks down, and for the first time, I see him struggle with what to say. “I know you love lilies.”

“Most people love lilies, Owen. But a bouquet will not fix this situation.”

“I know, which is why I wanted to speak with you first thing.” He motions to the bouquet again. “Please, will you hear me out?”

I slump into the chair, clicking my tongue against my teeth. “I’m really tired of this episode, Owen. I’ve seen this rerun several times already. It’s time to change the channel.”

“I know you’re angry and you have every right to be—”

“That’s just it. I was angry. Now, I’m just over it.”

The poor man looks positively stricken, but my sympathy meter is on empty. “I wanted to come over, more than anything.”

“See, that’s a lie. If you wanted to come over more than anything, you would have been there last night. But once again, you were with your glamorous and wildly important fiancée.”

“Ex-fiancée,” he bites out.

“Does it matter? It’s semantics at this point. Besides your patients, she’s the only one who ever sees you.” I hold up my hands, my attitude in full force. “Far be it from little old me to make a play for your time.”

“Tally.” I know that look. He’s become adept at the beseeching, come-hither stare over the last several weeks. Perhaps he was always talented in that arena and I’m just realizing it now.

“What, Owen?” I shrug, forcing a dry laugh. “What can I do for you?”

“I’m so sorry.”

“It’s okay.”

“It’s not.”

I nod—at least we agree on something. “It’s not, but it is you who missed out on mind blowing sex.”

His jaw slackens. “You’re joking.”

I shrug, keeping my gaze on the computer screen. “Guess you’ll never know.”

“How about I make it up to you? Twice as long, twice as good?”

“Nah. One and done. Sorry.”

His fingers tap the desk. Apparently being turned down for sex is not something he’s used to in his life. “We’ll see about that.”

I peer at him over the top of my glasses, sending him a scowl. “Check your ego, Dr. Stevens. You’re not that irresistible.”

His hand snakes across the desk, clasping mine. “No, I’m not. You are. I told you, you’re the purest heroin.”

“Could we find another analogy? I hate being compared to something that destroys lives.”

Owen chuckles, lifting my fingers to his lips. “How about this, then? You’re every dream I never knew I had. I didn’t believe in soulmates until I met you. You’re it for me, Tally.”

God, I hate him. I hate when he says things so profound and moving, and he looks so damn earnest and yet manages to smash my heart into bits on the ground. I pull my hand back, massaging the palm with my thumb. “Only one problem with that, Owen. I don’t believe you anymore.”

“Then I’ll prove it to you.”

I laugh, not because it’s funny but because it’s such a well-worn line. “Sure, you will.”

“Will you give me a chance?”

“Owen, I’ve given you nothing but chances. We may be having a baby together, but I think the idea of you and me as anything more than friends and co-parents is a bad idea. Mostly for me and my heart.”

“Did you ever love me or was it just a line, something to say back to me? Did you feel obligated? Is that why you said it yesterday?”

He is not going there.

“I’m not discussing this with you.”

His fist thumps the desk, making me jump. “I didn’t mean to scare you, but I need to know. Please, Tally. Here’s the thing—if you’re putting up this wall because I was a dick and fucked up, then that’s one thing. I’ll bash through it and prove myself worthy of your love. But if you feel nothing beyond friendship, put me out of my misery.”

“Release you back to Charlotte, is that it?” Ouch, that was sharp, even for me.

“I don’t want Charlotte.”

“I don’t know what you want, Owen. I don’t think you know what you want.”

“I want you—”

“You say that, but actions speak louder than words.” This argument has left me exhausted, mentally and physically. “I’m getting a headache. Can we not do this right now?”

He latches onto my hand again, giving it a squeeze. “Of course, I don’t want you stressed.”

“I’ve been stressed for weeks.”

“That ends today. I’m taking over…even if you feel nothing beyond friendship.”

I know this is where I’m supposed to reassure him I feel everything beyond friendship, that my entire body is lighting up like a damn carnival just being near him. But I can’t do it. Not this time. This time, I need to protect myself first. I spilled my heart yesterday, opening the door once again. And once again, he never showed.

I avert my gaze and pray that someone interrupts us.

The air between us hangs thick with tension, like the summer air before a thunderstorm cools everything down. I worry that if we don’t put some space between us, we’ll say something we regret.

“Five-thirty, right?”

My gaze swings back to him, narrowing in confusion. “Sorry?”

“The sonogram. It’s at five-thirty.”

“It is, but I know you’re busy.”

Do I want him there? Yes, indeed.

Do I want him to say he’ll be there, only to cancel and piss all over my hopes? Not a chance in hell.

Easier to play it off and expect nothing.

That’s what friends do, right?

God, being friends sucks.

“I’ll be at the sonogram.”

I push myself to a standing position, moving toward the door in an effort to move the conversation out of the office. “I told you, I’m fine. Me and Nugget got this.”

“Nugget?”

I laugh, despite the sadness in my heart. “That’s my nickname for him—or her. I think it’s a boy.”

Before I can react, his hand settles over my stomach, a smile I’ve never seen before playing along his mouth. “A boy, huh?”

“Just a hunch. Anyway,” I remove his hand, giving it an awkward squeeze, “You go do you.”

“Tally, I will be there.”

Trouble is, he’s said that several times in recent weeks and the only certainty is that he’ll disappoint me.

“You’d better go. You’ve got a case waiting for you in the cath lab.”

“Are you lost?” A cheery voice carries across the waiting room, and I look up to see Harriet, a former nurse turned midwife. She crosses the room in three long-legged strides, pulling me into a hard hug.

“Hi, Harriet,” I coo, returning her embrace. I miss this woman. She was my ride or die before Stefani, but between school and marriage and babies—you get the picture. “You look good.”

“You look pregnant. Holy shit, Tallulah! Come on back.”

I peer over my shoulder to the waiting area. A few women wait for their turn with the doctor, but Owen is nowhere to be found.

Knew it.

I wish that when you prepared yourself for disappointment, that it lessened the feeling. That’s how it should work, right?

So very, very wrong.

It’s a sinking feeling, knowing that the only part of Owen I’ll ever have is the child growing in my womb. But that will have to be enough.

Within five minutes, I’m gowned and waiting for Harriet to return, my eyes darting around the sterile exam room. I know the staff means the decor to be soothing, but it leaves me cold.

“There’s someone out here looking for you,” Harriet states, leaning in the door. She offers a wink and mouths ‘good job’ before pushing the door wide.

Owen.

He’s here.

He’s also a sweaty mess. Still hot, though. Maybe even more so. Damn my pregnancy hormones.

“Did you jog here?” I inquire, turning my face so his kiss lands on my cheek instead of its intended aim.

“I didn’t know where it was. Thankfully, Jessop told me. I’ve been scouring the hospital grounds for the last twenty minutes. I was so afraid I’d miss it.”

“You didn’t miss anything.” Harriet gives him a friendly clap on the shoulder. “So, you are the new talk of the town. Pleasure to meet you. Technically, I met you at that dinner, but there were so many important people flitting about that night.”

“Talk of the town?” Owen inquires, accepting Harriet’s offer of a water bottle and guzzling half of it down.

“Yes, brilliant renowned cardiologist come to roost in our little enclave. You’re very fancy.”

“She’s a smart ass,” I murmur, looking anywhere but at Owen.

“Don’t you forget it,” Harriet counters with a wink. “So…you two, huh? Isn’t that fantastic? I like this girl here far better than your purported fiancée, even if she is a billionaire’s daughter.” She squeezes my shoulder in a sign of solidarity, but the damage is done.

See, Owen? Everyone thinks you and Charlotte are together, which makes me look like the mistress. Fabulous.

Owen’s face pales under his tan. “Who told you I was engaged?”

Harriet chuckles. In true fashion, she doesn’t hold back. “The billionaire’s daughter. She made it quite clear to all of us in the immediate area that you were off limits.”

A muscle ticks in Owen’s jaw. “I’ll deal with her. Thanks for the heads up.”

“I assume that you’re the—”

“He’s a friend,” I blurt out, ignoring the incredulous look crossing Owen’s face. I know he’s pissed, but I’ll deal with him later. Right now, I’m trying not to burst into tears, as what should have been a beautiful moment is marred—once again—by Charlotte’s pervading presence.

Harriet glances between the two of us before offering me a pat on the arm. “You can’t have too many friends. Let’s get started, shall we? Lu, you’re going to be a mom! That’s amazing.”

“Thanks.” I feel Owen’s gaze on me, but I keep my focus on the ceiling. That’s a safe spot.

“How’s your Dad?”

I swallow against the tears. So much for this being a pleasant visit. “He passed away a couple of weeks ago.”

Harriet pauses, her eyes glassy. She knows what the man meant to me. “I’m so sorry. I didn’t know, or I would have been there.”

I nod at her words, but it’s the feel of Owen’s hand enveloping mine that brings me back to the present. I glance at him and he offers a sad smile, his fingers tracing along my palm.

“Okay, here comes the fun part.”

I slide up my gown, aware of Owen’s laser stare. Harriet squirts the gel on my stomach, and I flinch. “Holy hell, that’s cold.”

Owen has yet to release my hand, his lips moving lightly across my fingers. “You are showing,” he murmurs.

I blame the hormones as tears back up in my eyes again. “I’m so short that there’s nowhere for Nugget to hide. I’ll be a waddling mess soon,” I retort, forcing a smile in his direction.

“You’re beautiful.”

“You have to say that,” I volley back.

“I mean it. You’ve never been so beautiful.”

I meet his gaze, all ready with a sarcastic barb, but it dies in my throat. There’s a softness in his face, and I’m not willing to ruin it with words. Particularly not the wrong words.

Meanwhile, Harriet is busy pressing buttons and flipping knobs with one hand, the other wrapped around the probe as it maneuvers around my stomach. She looks like she’s operating a spaceship, but I see the smile flit across her face at Owen’s words.

“There’s your baby.” She turns on a switch and the sound of our baby’s heartbeat fills the room.

In that moment, I forget everything beyond my baby and its fast-beating heart. I’ve seen hundreds of sonograms, but this is different. This time, Nugget is mine.

I lift a finger, tracing along the screen as the baby moves its arms. It’s love at first sight.

Wiping away tears that I know are happy—finally—I steal a gaze at Owen. The look on his face is priceless, his own eyes bright with emotion.

Our gazes hold, and he presses a kiss to my forehead. I’ve never seen the smile that decorates his face before. I hope our baby has his beautiful eyes.

“It’s nice to see the father so involved,” Harriet states with a knowing smile. “You must be excited, Dr. Stevens.”

“See, Tally? Everyone else sees it. Now, I just need you to see it,” Owen whispers, his mouth against my skin.

Harriet stands, printing out a copy of our baby. “It’s obvious. The way he’s looking at you and your baby, there’s no way he isn’t the father. He’s in love. With both of you.”