FOREVER KNIGHTS: #9 Feral Breed

“What are you saying, Jax?” She leaned back to see him.

“You know what I’m saying.”

“That you love me?”

He sighed and clenched her tight enough she could no longer look up at him. Reluctant to let her have any space, just now. I’m going to miss you.

I’ll miss the peace you bring me. You silence the voices that torment me.

He felt the briefest shake in his hands as he put a palm between her shoulder blades to hold her more firmly. Don’t give me away. He willed the betraying limbs.

“Jax, I don’t want to be away from you.”

“I know, Murah.”

“Don’t make me go.”

“I have to, Murah.” His voice was steady.

Good. I don’t feel steady.

“I want to go to your tent.”

“Okay.” He walked her backward, still huddled against him, along the deck and around front. He verified no one was around to see her misery. Catching her shoulders, he righted her and walked her before him through the courtyard, Undermarket and to his expansive gray tent. Once inside she twirled to cling to him again.

Looking very different from the tough Barter Queen running Undermarket by day and Winter Haven by night.

This is who she really is. A woman who doesn’t want to be alone. A woman who desperately needs something steady when her waters are stormy.

It’s better for her to be away from me. He thought. Despite every fiber of his being screaming against the thought. And the constriction in his chest.

Dimurah caught the bottom of his tunic and pulled it off, exposing his scarred chest and shoulders. Her hands splaying to run his warm flesh.

He dropped his arms to his side and let her have her fill of touching him. Her nimble hands caressing over the entirety of his body.

She sidled forward to put her cheek to one side of his chest, listening quietly to his heartbeat. “I can’t be away from you, Jax.”

“I know.”

“Why are you making me leave?”

“You know why.”

To keep you safe.

“You always think I know what you’re thinking and why you do things.”

You do.

He looked at her. Face concentratedly impassive. If she sees I’m weak. It’ll weaken her. He knew she always drew her strength from him.

“I don’t.” She said.

“You do. You just never agree.”

“Jax…”

“I know, Murah.”

She peeled her cloak off and untied the back of her gown to shrug out of it. Stepping free of it to press her body to his. Feeling his skin.

His arms wrapped her lower back lightly and he walked her backward to his low cot.

She nestled in, rolling over to scoot back against him and tugging his arms tight around her.

He was quiet. Deathly still. Holding her. Listening until her shuddering sobs stopped and she subsided in slumber. He took in the scent of her. Her smell, the texture of her hair and skin. Lightly caressing his fingertips over her shoulder and down her arm.

After a time, she rolled to snuggle against him.

Once she was still, he slid back enough to see her face. Caressing her cheek and outlining her brows and the slope of her nose. Moving to the sharp lines of her defined cheekbones. I’m going to miss her face.

At first light he bundled her into his arms and pressed kisses to the top of her head. Sliding his large tunic over her head and pulling a pair of his breeches up over her shapely legs while she sat on the edge of his cot watching him with a mournful expression. He rolled the breeches up at the cuff so they’d be short enough to her. Despite the slightly bagging waist. He wrapped her in his heaviest fur and carried her out of the tent.

“Jax. No…” She whimpered into his bare collar. Face tucked into his neck as she clutched him.

“You need to go, Murah. Don’t make me be cruel. You know I will.”

“You’ve never been cruel to me!”

“I know.”

“Don’t…”

RedBayne was waiting in the foggy courtyard. Holding his arms out for her, but when Savage went to hand her over she shrieked loud enough to wake the fortress.

Savage’s face crumpled.

“Dimurah.” RedBayne chastised. “Ye know I won’t hurt ye.”

“I won’t go!” She leapt from Savage’s arms. Clutching the fur around her as she backed up like a scared animal prepared to fight.

RedBayne’s arms fell. “She’s not going to go with me, Savage Jack.”

“I know.” He watched her with a heartbroken expression.

RedBayne was startled by the depth of emotion raw on Savage’s face. His mouth gaping slightly at the astonishing sight.

Screw him.

Composing himself, RedBayne said “We have to get her out of here before word gets here. I saw them posting the posters yesterday. By now half of Ardae will be headed this way for her.”

I know! Savage gritted his teeth looking at him. Scarred hands working tight fists. Wanting to hit him just to expel his frustration.

“No.” RedBayne shook his head at him. Knowing the look. “You’re not going to take this out on me. You’re too clever to try and blame it where it’s not due.”

He’s right. Damn him!

Savage sighed. “Fine.”

“I’m not going.” Dimurah shook her head so firmly that curling red hair tossed over one shoulder than the other. Her lips whitened. Blue eyes sparking fiercely. “Not a chance you’ll make me leave.”