Dear Heart, You Screwed Me

Who did he think he was? My good mood had been ruined by him. The last words he said to me circled round and round in my mind. We fucked baby, there is no more annulment. He wouldn’t do that to me… would he? I shook my head from side to side quickly. I am not giving him another moment of mind time. Pulling my hair into a ponytail, I slipped my shoes on and grabbed my bag before running for the door. I didn’t want to get a taxi, I wanted to walk to clear my head of a certain individual. Again, he who shall not be named.

I must admit though, the sex last night was phenomenal, who knew sex could feel that good. But that was a momentary slip. It won’t happen again.

A pain seared through my heart at what I had done. I knew I couldn’t stay celibate for the rest of my life after Elijah, but it still didn’t make it easier. Each time I slept with someone new, I felt like I lost a little bit more of him. Bit by bit, little by little, piece by piece.

The cold air nipped at my skin, my eyes watering in the blistering cold. I couldn’t believe how quick the temperature had changed. We didn’t get weather like this back home in England. My phone buzzed in my pocket, grabbing it I saw Connie’s name. I smiled.

Slipping my earphones in and waiting for them to connect, I answered.

“Good morning,” my breath was short as the cold air filled my lungs, my legs moving faster so I warmed up.

“Morning, my little sugar plum fairy. How was your evening?” she asked, I could hear people talking behind her. She was obviously on reception duty. Her favourite.

“Evening was…” I stopped for a moment before nibbling my lip, I couldn’t tell her. Not yet. “Quiet,” I scoffed. “Yours?”

“Eh…” she stilled; I could hear the smile in her voice.

The phone line fell silent for a moment. “Any idea on thanksgiving yet?” she asked.

She had been asking if I wanted to spend thanksgiving with her to save me being alone, but I thought I would have gotten home. But what with everything going on with Harlen and Killian, going home doesn’t seem the right thing to do right now.

“Well, if it’s not too late, I would love to spend it with you,” I smiled.

“Yay! This is so exciting! I can’t remember the last time I had a friend over, I’ll let my dad know.”

I swallowed hard.

“Your dad?” I stammered slightly, “I thought we would just be together.”

“Who do you think is cooking the turkey?” she scoffed, “it isn’t going to be me, duh.”

“Oh man, your dad isn’t going to want me there, it’s fine, I’ll sort out a microwave dinner meal,” I waved my hand through the air, my eyes traveling up as I looked at the tall building that I worked in.

“You will not!” Connie shrieked.

I rolled my eyes, my cheeks burning as I thought back to this morning before the lust turned to rage.

“Only if you’re sure,” I said quietly.

“Positive.”

“Why aren’t you with your mums?”

“They’re away for their anniversary or some shit,” I heard her snicker, “so daddy dearest it is.”

“Ah okay! I’ve got to go Con, I’m at work. Dinner tomorrow?” I asked softly.

“Dinner sounds perfect.”

“Bye Con,” I said, cutting the phone off and slipping it into my bag. Inhaling deeply, I pushed through the rotating glass doors and headed straight for my desk.

I had just come back from lunch with Julianne, waving bye to her as I continued to where I sat when I stilled. Sitting in my chair with his feet on my desk was the devil himself. My husband.

“What do I owe the pleasure?” I rolled my eyes, stopping in front of my desk.

“Eyes,” he winked, his eyes trailing up and down my body.

I stood waiting for him to answer my earlier question. He just sat there fucking smirking.

“What do you want, Killian?” I snapped now; my arms crossed in front of me.

“Just wanted to see my wife, is that okay?” his fingers pressed into the bottom of his chin.

“Don’t bullshit me,” my voice was low as I leant across the desk, pressing my hands flat to the surface.

Now he rolled his eyes at me, kicking his feet off my desk he sat up straight in my chair.

“Do I have to have a reason?” he asked, his eyes glued to mine.

I didn’t answer. I suppose he didn’t.

“Can I have my chair back, I am busy.” My tone was clipped, dropping my arms as I walked around the side of my desk.

“Yup, the lady I want to see is just walking in…” his eyes moved from mine as he watched Adele walk towards us. Killian pushed up, done his suit jacket up and began walking towards where Adele was and I just stood there, like a fucking moron watching. Adele didn’t even look at me as she walked past, just held her head high, smirking. Killian fell into step behind her, stopping before her office and winking at me before the door closed.

Ugh.

I couldn’t help but feel tense the whole time Killian was in there. I couldn’t see anything because of the stupid frosted glass. The bitter taste coated my tongue at my thoughts. What if he was fucking her in there? And more importantly, why the fuck did I care? I wasn’t the jealous type, but what didn’t help was the fact that he had his beautiful dick inside me last night and now there was a small chance he was balls deep in her. I shuddered at the thought.

I wasn’t a jealous person, and green definitely wasn’t my colour but I was wearing a pretty shade of it right about now. I shouldn’t even be jealous. Our marriage and relationship are a farce. It was nothing, we were nothing. I am being silly, I knew that we couldn’t even stand each other if I was being honest, there was just a sexual attraction. That’s all.

Scrolling up and down on my work document, I couldn’t seem to get going. I knew what I needed to do; I had a check list of work piling up around me. Yet my fucking mind was in that office with them.

Chances were that Killian wasn’t getting his glorious cock sucked off by the dragon behind that door, they were no doubt in a boring meeting. Yes, that was it. A boring meeting.

Slipping my earphones in, I blasted Blondie through them. I needed a distraction. And she was the perfect choice.

An hour later and halfway through Sunday Girl I saw Adele’s office door open. Killian walked out before turning and shaking her hand. I dropped my eyes quickly and focused on the task in front of me. I didn’t want to show him for one second that he had invaded my thoughts.

My stomach rolled as she gave him a sickly smile, her eyes flicking over to me before she stepped back and closed her door.

The sound of Killian’s shoes clicked along the floor as he stopped in front of my desk. Leaning over, he grabbed my earphone out and put it into his ear. His brows pinging up as he heard the chorus of Sunday Girl.

Pushing off my chair, I snatched it from his ears.

“Don’t touch what’s not yours,” I snarled at him, sitting back in my chair and shoving the earphone back in my ear.

He removed it again.

“But you are mine, so technically I can touch them,” he let out a soft chuckle.

“I’m not yours,” I shook my head, “Do you just come here to annoy me? Because, unlike you, I am busy. I actually have to do work here to get paid.” My tone was sharp as I averted my eyes back to my screen.

“Oh, I am very busy with work,” he glanced over at Adele’s office and licked his lips slowly.

“You’re disgusting, get away from me,” I shooed him away like the annoyance he was. He walked round to the side of me, lowering his lips against my ear.

“You didn’t think I was disgusting when you took my dick last night, Buttercup.”

I stilled, my stomach flipping, the familiar burn warming my belly before moving between my legs.

“Last night didn’t happen. It was a mistake.” I swallowed hard before clearing my throat.

“Oh baby, it happened. Your moans are still replaying over in my head.”

I inhaled deeply. I could feel the tension between us, the pull that was gravitating us towards each other, but I couldn’t give in again. Last night was a moment of weakness.

“Keep going Killian, I dare you,” I grit out.

He straightened up, a cocky smirk on his face.

“I want you to spend thanksgiving with me next week,” his voice was low, his hands fisted into his pockets.

“Sorry, I’m busy,” I didn’t even give him the satisfaction of looking at him.

“With who?” I could hear how thick his voice was, his jaw must ache from how much he clenches it.

“Harlen,” I smirked. I wasn’t, but he didn’t know that.

“You better be joking Reese,” he snarled as he pushed his hand through his luscious locks in frustration.

“Or what?” I taunted, turning in my chair to look up at him, “You going to stop me?” I shook my head from side to side before returning to my work.

He didn’t say anything, just turned on his heel and stormed out of the office like a raging bull. Good riddance.

My phone rang, flashing Adele’s name. Clicking it onto speaker I answered.

“Yup,” the frustration clear in my voice.

“A minute.” She snapped then the phone went dead.

Here we go.

Walking into her room with a spring in my step I knocked before waiting to be called in. Opening the door, I plastered a shit eating grin on my face.

“You wanted to see me?” I smiled as I stood, closing the door behind me.

“Why did I see Killian Hayes storm away from your desk just a moment ago?” she pressed her fingers into her chin as she waited for me to answer.

“I’m not sure. He was asking me what my plans were for thanksgiving, then his phone rang, something about his STD results being back and that he needed to see them urgently,” I shrugged, clicking my tongue on the roof of my mouth.

I watched as her eyes widened. My head dropped slightly, my jaw becoming lax.

“Oh…” I breathed, thumbing behind me, “Oh…” I feigned realisation kicking in. “Are you and him a thing? Shit, sorry…” I winced. “I would give him a call if I were you.”

She didn’t say anything, but then why would she? I had just got my validation that they were… are… or at least had slept together at some point.

“Will that be all?” I locked my index fingers as I asked her quietly.

She shooed me away; giving her a polite, curt nod, I turned on my heel before that shit eating grin I told you about spread so much further on my face. Before I was even out the door, her phone was in her hand.

Game on Killian.