Cyber Love

I giggled like a maniac, staring into my phone at Zeke’s face.

"No Sash!" He laughed. "You tell me what I'm going to do to you!" His smile was huge and it made my butterflies go crazy in my stomach. Everytime I looked at him I was blown away by his beauty.

"Why are you always talking about sex? You're obsessed!" I teased him.

"Because I fucking miss you and want to pretend I am actually touching you." He smirked. "Go on, tell me about your day," he over the top rolled his eyes and I burst out laughing.

"I do actually have something to talk to you about". My mind went to Liv.

"Oh?" His face looked serious, not something I was used to.

"My sister is having a party for her anniversary in a couple of weeks and she's invited you." I watched his face drop and in turn my stomach did too.

"I can't come to London Sash." His voice sounded sad and I felt a tear behind my eye. "Oh," was all I said. Neither of us said anything for a while, just stared. My tears escaped, running down my cheek. Zeke’s brow crossed and he looked in deep thought.

"Okay, it's fine" I tried to chuckle.

"Let me see if I can talk to probation."

"What happens when you get a job here?" I asked, chewing my bottom lip.

"That's different, I will be in paid employment. I can't just travel out of Manchester".

"Why?" It was an odd restriction and he had never explained why.

"It's part of my conditions," he shrugged, not going any further. I laid down in my bed further, getting comfortable.

"But why? Did they tell you why? Or is it just a thing?" I trailed off, knowing nothing about probation.

"Because I sold drugs like fucking everywhere and they don't trust me." He shrugged again and I let out a breath.

"Right," I responded, not really understanding. "Baby don't make me feel worse then I do, shit." His hand went on his head.

"I'm not sure how I'm doing that". I chuckled sadly.

"Because of your super sad fucking voice. Let me talk to probation. They might allow me for one night but I'll have to come home straight away". I nodded, not looking up at him. I didn't want him to see another tear.

"No, don't go to all that effort, it's fine." I looked up and smiled at him. It felt fake as hell and Zeke picked up on it.

"Don't do that fake smile, I will talk to probation". His voice sounded slightly irritated and it annoyed me.

"No, leave it. It's fine, don't annoy them".

"What are you going to say to Liv? Why I'm not there?" I shrugged, moving my eyes from him.

"That you're busy, at work, whatever". My voice was flat and I didn't know if I was more irritated or sad.

"Sasha!" He shouted and I looked at him on my tiny phone. "Spit it out, shit. I know you're annoyed". I put my head back against the pillow.

"I'm not annoyed, I'm sad".

"That's super worse but whatever". For some reason the word whatever made me even more upset. I quickly wiped my eyes before I completely broke down.

"I don't like the word whatever". I huffed.

"Oh my god!" Zeke groaned, dropping his head on his pillow. "You literally also said whatever." This wasn't getting us anywhere, I took a deep breath before I spoke.

"I'm sad that you can't come to my sister's party, I'm pissed off because the reason you can't is because you got into trouble, but I suffer". Zeke went to talk but I carried on. "I'm annoyed you can't come and see me and was we not going to see each other again until you got a job?" My face was crinkled in frustration.

"Sash, you're so cute." He smiled at me and I refused to give him one back. "I know this is fucking shit but I can't do anything about it. I break probation rules and I go back to prison babe". I nodded quickly. "Of course I want to meet Liv, go to a party with you. I would love that but I can't." He shrugged. "Also I was definitely betting on you coming to see me again." He laughed, in his infectious way and it broke me, I smiled at him. "Hey I got a smile". He joked.

"Funny".

"Baby, I know it makes a difficult situation even more difficult." His face was serious again. "I'm not going to sit here and say to you, if I met you ten years ago I wouldn't have gotten into trouble, because I probably would have." I looked into his gorgeous face. "But these are my two options for now, either listen to them fucks or be in prison. You understand?" His voice was so sweet at the end and I nodded at him, wiping my face.

"I understand".

"You can run away," he chuckled. This conversation was really getting to me and I wasn't sure why. Zeke was right, it made a shitty situation worse and I was just so pissed off I had to go to Liv's party on my fucking own.

"Liv is going to think I made you up". I let out a little laugh. Zeke was silent for the longest time.

"Sash, don't say that. I will meet her soon, I promise." He let out a breath and stared into his face. "You know if I could be there I would be right?" I nodded, I think I knew that.

"Sorry. This conversation is depressing me" I laughed.

"Don't say sorry. You're right to be upset." We smiled at each other for a while before Zeke finally spoke again. "Let me see them tits please. I need cheering up".