Chapter A Dark Past
I have never been so angry in my entire life. I watched through red-tinted vision as Adam raised his hand to strike Jace. Faster than I could comprehend, I was by his side holding tightly Adam’s wrist inches from coming in contact with Jace’s right cheek.
My fingers tightened their hold as I warned, “Enough.”
Adam’s face paled as his eyes darted away from mine. He raised his right hand to his left wrist, which, I was starting to notice, was turning a colorful array of colors near where we were making contact.
“Ok, ok. I got it. Just… Sage please let go. Please,” his begged, his eyes staring intently at my shoes.
Finally processing what I was doing I released Adam from my grip. As my vision cleared, I took in the damage I had created on Adam’s wrist. I was mortified.
“Adam, I’m so sorry,” I gushed out, “I don’t know what came over me. I guess I’m still recovering in the head. I know I shouldn’t be making excuses.”
“No. You shouldn’t. How could you do this to Adam?! All he’s ever done is like you. Is that such a crime?” Lizzy screeched out, rushing to examine Adam’s wrist.
I bowed my head in shame, feeling the tears begin to form.
I felt an arm wrap around my shoulders providing a warm, electric feeling course to my toes.
Then a warm, peppermint hot chocolate relaxing voice spoke up, “I wasn’t going to say anything for Sage’s sake, but she’s suffering from a bipolar disorder. She hit her head extremely hard in the spot on your brain that controls your emotions. The doctor said it should be temporary so no need to worry. In fact, that’s the main reason I didn’t invite,” he gave them both a pointed look, “you here. We weren’t entirely sure how her bipolar state was and, as you saw, she can become quite… uh, dangerous.”
I stared in amazement at Jace. His lie was a little too smooth. I guess I should be a little more careful around him. His lies sound as sweet as truth.
“Oh my gosh,” Lizzy gasped, “Is this true Sage?”
I lowered my eyes and nodded, trying to avoid speaking as much as possible. I was a horrible liar.
Lizzy gingerly grabbed my hands, placing them in hers as she continued, “I’m so sorry. To be honest, I thought they were holding you here against your will. I didn’t know this had happened. Could you forgive me?”
I nodded and embraced my good friend.
“Of course. How could I not?”
As we pulled apart, I noticed the glimmer of tears in her eyes and on her cheeks.
“Lizzy,” I exclaimed in shock, “what’s wrong?”
“Oh,” she started, frantically wiping away her tears, “Nothing. I feel bad. That’s all.”
“I feel bad too. I’m sorry for coming and causing a ruckus with the people who helped you,” Adam apologized, coming up behind Lizzy and placing his hand on my shoulder. At least he sounded mostly sincere. Though, I wouldn’t be surprised if his biggest regret was not being able to deck Jace in the face.
“You are both forgiven. But I do think it would be best for you to go. I would hate to have another bipolar moment on you,” I said sincerely. It wasn’t an actual lie. I really did feel like there was a different part of me now. I didn’t have any control over my actions and the emotion came so suddenly I didn’t have time to register. Maybe it’s part of becoming connected to my wolf.
“No,” Adam stated sternly. I was so taken aback I couldn’t say anything.
“No?” Lukas repeated, stepping closer to us.
“That’s what I said,” he stated, choosing to be stubborn for some reason, “What makes you think you can take better care of her than we can? We are her friends. We have known her much longer than you. And since it is a bipolar disorder, we’d be much more capable of noticing any changes in her normal behavior.”
“Like you did a minute ago.”
I turned in shock to hear Ian speak up.
“You say you can take care of your friend better than we can. However, from what I’ve gathered Sage’s closest family is her aunt and uncle and it doesn’t appear she is too anxious to get back to them. Then there’s the fact that she acted out of character once and your immediate reaction was to blame her rather than the instigator. Yes, you’ve known her longer. However, we have seen the most honest version of Sage in the last forty-eight hours than you could ever hope to know,” Ian ended with a finality in his voice that would intimidate any ordinary person.
There was a long silence during which Lizzy and Adam seemed to be having an inward battle and I could see which side was winning.
“Plus,” I added, “they are as good of friends as the both of you are. They have taken care of me when they didn’t have to. They’ve helped me deal with these new changes and I wouldn’t want anyone else to have found me to help me. I know you don’t trust them, but I do. Isn’t that enough?”
Adam’s face softened as he said, “I trust you. But if you are truly bipolar, I can’t trust your mental state.”
I flinched as his words sunk in.
Eager to bring peace and heal the wound, Lizzy stepped in and said, “Why don’t we compromise. Allow us to stay one day here and if we feel comfortable leaving our friend her, we’ll leave first thing tomorrow. If we don’t like what we see, then she comes with us. Does that work for everyone? Sage?”
I glance at the faces of Lukas, Ian, Venessa, and Jace. Venessa was expressionless, probably because this decision had nothing to do with her. But for the guys, they wore identical masks of uncertainty.
I finally freed the breath I hadn’t notice was still inside as Jace spoke up, “Alright. It’s a deal. But there are some rules I need you to follow.”
Lizzy was literally hopping in place from excitement. Both of their ears were perked, ready for the instructions. I hoped for all of our sakes Lizzy would refrain from being a curious cat for these next few hours.
“Rule number one. Anywhere you go outside the house must be with either Lukas, Ian, or myself. I don’t care why you are leaving the house, but one of us must come with. Rule number two. Stay out of my office and out of anyone’s personal rooms. I don’t care if they invite you in or not, you are to stay out of people’s private rooms. Rule number three. If I tell you to do something, no matter how crazy or illogical it may sound, follow it without hesitation. Any questions?” Jace hardly blinked as he stated his conditions. I’m really grateful I was not on the other end of that stare. It was hair rising from where I stood.
“Why?” Adam questioned, a challenge in his voice.
I mentally smacked myself for Adam’s stupidity. It seemed to me he had a death wish.
Jace gave him a dark look, but answered, “We’ve had a lot of wildlife attacks in recent weeks. Food is scarce, so they are starting to wander here. As for the bedrooms, it’s so I don’t mistake your intentions. If you are not in the bedroom, I won’t have to worry about what’s going on.”
“That’s none of your business,” Adam challenged again. I was now convinced the guy had a death wish.
Jace stepped closer, his face inches from Adam’s.
“My house, my rules,” Jace replied icily.
“We’re not a bunch of kids for you to look after,” Adam retorted.
This time Jace got close to Adam’s hear and whispered. I was able to catch the words thanks to my new hearing and my proximity to the boys.
“You’re not. But say you found out someone close to you had been hurt physically and emotionally just inches from where you had slept peacefully from their only living family and… Once that has happened to you then tell me I’m going overboard.”
I tried to hold back my immediate impulse to vomit. My heart broke hearing those words. I knew Jace wasn’t making something up from the way his voice cracked as he spoke. His voice so far had always been of the calm and collected nature. But his words did more to me than make me feel nauseated and heartbroken. His brief scenario brought to light so much that happened in the dark where I wanted it to stay. I fought against the images in my head with all my might.
One poignant image sharpened into view uninvited. It was of a girl, locked in her room, and her uncle’s sickening Cheshire grin.
I clenched my hands into fists, digging my nails deep into the skin to bring myself back to the safe reality I was in. That image could burn in a fiery pit for all I cared. If only there were such a place within one’s memories.
I could hear Aeleine’s whimpers echoing.
You saw that, didn’t you?
I asked the question slowly afraid I already knew the answer.
She whimpered a response.
Yes. I was there too. I’ve always been here. I’m so sorry I couldn’t help you at that time.
I imagined a smile to my wolf and gently consoled her.
It’s ok. There was no way for you to help me. It’s of the past. It’s ok.
No, she whispered back, it’s not ok. It’s not over yet.
Chills shivered down my spine as I recalled how I was forbidden from leaving home. If I did, the only person that ever cared about me would die slowly from lack of care.
Grandma is a good woman. We should take care of her.
My wolf sounded a bit comforted at the thought of my grandma. She had been my guardian angel. She had no idea the things that had gone on under her roof. It wasn’t due to her turning a blind eye or anything. It was simply because there were too many expert liars and schemers blanketing the truth from view. Anytime she did see something, she stopped it and punished the guilty party. Sadly, she was never there when things were at their worst.
But this time, my wolf continued, you won’t be standing alone.
She released a threatening growl and I mentally laughed. It was good knowing someone strong was on my side.
I’m strong only because you are.
I thought about her words for a second. No one had ever called me strong before. In fact, most people thought of me either as crazy or weak or a combination of both. But no one had described me as strong.
Images flashed through my mind of the last few days. Fighting and winning. Over and over and over again.
You know what, I thought back to her, I think we are strong because it is part of both of us and not any one individual.
Wiser words have never been spoken.
Feeling more at peace with my situation than I have in a long while, I finally released my poor palms from the whitening grip. I massaged the tender five prints on both hands as I focused my attention back on the scene in front of me.
By this point, Jace had stepped away and was leading Lizzy and Adam up the stairs. Probably to show them where they would be staying.
I stepped to follow them, realizing I’m not entirely sure which room I’m supposed to be staying in, when I felt a hand wrap around my arm.
I turned to come in full view of Lukas’ golden-brown eyes.
“Where are you going?” he asked, sounding genuinely confused.
“I was going to see where I’m supposed to stay. I’m not sure which room I’m in,” I replied honestly.
He let out a small chuckle as he ruffled my hair.
“Silly girl. You’ll be staying with me.”