Children of Chaos - Book 1

"Where am I?"

“Kyra, listen! I need to tell you a story and you need to pay attention because the story is yours.”

The night was dark, starless and cold, with only the rustle of leaves to pierce the silence. You stood there, on top of the hill, looking down over the valley and all that lay upon it. Three years. That’s how long it had been since you had last stepped foot into these woods, swearing that you would never come back. Three years since you had been no more than a confused little girl. Three years was nothing, and yet, it was a bloody long time.

So much had changed since you had last been here, so much was the same. But you had changed most of all. The girl in your memories seemed like a stranger to you now, someone you had heard about, once, in a story, not someone you had once been. You clenched your fists and took a deep breath. It was time to go. Slowly you started down the hill, your feet leaving no prints upon the wet grass, almost as if you were floating.

A cool breeze of air washed over you, lifting the hair on the back of your neck and making you shiver. It almost felt like a cold pair of lips had brushed you, and the scar, running from your left temple to the corner of your eye, down your cheek and to your collar bone tingled, reminding you of why you were here. It was a fine white line, barely a scratch and yet it had never healed. You suspected that it never would, not until this was over. It was your personal motivator when you wanted to give up. It reminded you of all you’d lost and had yet to lose.

The gates were now rising up before you and you hesitated again. Just a few more steps and the Reservoir would lie before you, just as it had so many years ago when you had first come here. And on the day they had cast you out. Your lips were tightly pressed together in a bitter line as you remembered your exile. For a second you thought about turning back, about returning to Asha and hiding away for the rest of your life. You would be on the run, but at least you would be together. Your scar tingled again and you shoved the thought aside, letting determination take its place. You wouldn’t run. You wouldn’t hide. You were going to stand and fight to the very end, and you were going to win. There was no other option. And so you pulled your shoulders back and stepped through the gates with your head held high. Bring it on, you thought, bring it on.

The world seemed to come alive as you stepped through the gate and barrier, keeping the outside world from seeing the Reservoir. The light and life within the magical borders were a strong contrast to the silence that had surrounded you without. A different world. But why was there so much life and light? It was in the middle of the night, and the Reservoir was pretty strict in its rules, it was a training place after all. Then you remembered the full moon. The noise you were hearing was the after party of a placing ceremony. The occasion seemed oddly ironic, given that you had had to leave on the night of your own. Exiled.

The commotion was both good and bad for you. Good because in the general showing off of gifts and powers, your subtle power would not be picked up. Bad because you would have to be extra careful not to be seen. But then again there were ways around that.

So you stepped into the shadows, becoming a part of them and rendering yourself, for all intents and purposes, invisible. You walked straight into the centre of the Reservoir, unseen by the people cluttering the tables and benches. You were heading straight for Morgains residence, moving within the shadows that the fire cast when you saw them. Lynn and Ethan were standing only a few feet away from you. Lynn was laughing, a strong and warm sound, if you remembered correctly, and Ethan was smiling at her, a soft expression on his face. At least that hadn’t changed. It was odd, the feeling that you had when you saw their faces. They had been your closest friends, and you had never gotten the chance to say good-bye. Another injustice to be atoned for.

But now, that you saw them, you realized once again that the girl who had been their friend was gone. She had died at least twice in the last three years. Still, the heavy feeling in your chest wouldn’t go away, and you had to force yourself to keep moving. They were not the reason that you were here.

Morgain’s house looked like a plain wooden cabin from the outside, but on the inside it resembled a mansion. She had been born a princess and as modestly as her students had to live, she still liked to feel like one. You had always teased her about it. The thought made you smile as you stepped through the door.

You could have left the shadows, at least here you were safe, but you wanted to surprise her. You assumed that she would be in her study, she usually was, poring over one book or the other, and you weren’t disappointed. You stood in the doorway, looking in at her sitting in her big plush chair, a book in her hand, her long brown hair falling down her back, her forest green eyes fixed on the pages in front of her. She was wearing a pair of purple sweat pants, something she’d never let anyone except for you see, ever, and you felt a wave of emotion rush over you at the sight of her. You had missed her so much!

“Are you going to keep hiding in the shadows or will you actually say hi like a normal person?”, she said without looking up from her book, the corners of her mouth pulled up ever so slightly. You grinned and stepped out of the shadows.

“I should have known I couldn’t fool you”, you said, smiling widely.

She put her book down and looked up at you, a kind smile on her face.

"Yes, you should have. Nice new trick, by the way."

“I’ve missed you”, you said, feeling tears beginning to form in your eyes. You hadn’t cried in a long time, not since you’d left Asha, but Morgain was your family. The only family you had left.

“I’ve missed you too”, she said, getting up out of her chair and capturing you in a strong embrace. You’d forgotten how tall she was. The two of you stood there like that for a while and then finally broke apart, both wiping the tears from your eyes.

“How have you been?”, Morgain asked, and something in her voice let you know that she knew how loaded the question was. You hesitated with answering, you weren’t sure what to say.

“I need your help”, you finally said, choosing not to give a direct answer to the question. There just wasn’t enough time to cover three years of joy and pain. That would have to wait for better times. She nodded as if she’d expected as much. She’d always known you better than anyone else.

“Tell me what you need.”

You were not sure how long you had slept, it couldn’t have been more than an hour, but when you awoke everything was quiet. The feast must have died down. Your neck felt sore from falling asleep in Morgain’s big armchair, and yet you couldn’t remember how long it had been since you’d slept so soundly, without one eye open. Ironic, come to think about it. The thought made you smile a hard little smile.

You got up and stretched your limbs, stifling a yawn. It was still dark outside and you couldn't help but wonder. How much had changed in the last three years? How much was still the same? You quietly slipped out of the door and started walking at a slow pace as curiosity got the better of you. Before the claiming this had been your haven, your safe place, and the memory of that remained.It was hard to break the habit of running, you had been doing it for so long, but here, in this place you had once felt home, it was a little easier to let go. Which was ironic, considering that it was the Elders that you were running from.

You came to the top of a hill, one you had once spent many evening on, and looked down over the valley. The cabins were all dark, the people within fast asleep, and the moon was low in the sky, stars already beginning to fade. You closed your eyes and took a deep breath. The air in the Reservoir had always seemed cleaner, purer, somehow, as if all the toxins of the modern world were kept at bay. For all you knew the barrier did just that. You smiled at the thought.

“I did not expect to see you here.” You spun around so fast the other person didn’t even have time to blink before your blade was at his throat. He was tall so you had to hold it up under his chin as your cold eyes glared up at him. The stranger blinked in surprise for a second and then flung himself backwards, elegantly rolling and coming back up on his feet, only a few feet from you. Now that he was a little further away you recognized the face and instantly frowned. This was no stranger, but you wished he was.

“Aidan.”

The name tasted bitter on your tongue. He was the last person you had wanted to see while you were here. Lynn and Ethan maybe, but Aidan? He was an arrogant pain in the ass.

“What are you doing here?” you asked, not trying to keep the contempt out of your voice. He raised his eyebrows in surprise and then chuckled.

“What am I doing here? I think the better question is what you’re doing here? I’m not the one who disappeared three years ago, without a word.”

He had a point. But you had no intention of letting him know that. It was a strange feeling seeing him again, after all those years and after so much had happened. Once you had thought that you loved him. Then you had found real, true love, the kind stories didn’t talk about because there were no words. Aidan reminded you of who you had been before that, weak and pathetic. So, instead of answering his question, you just looked at him with a blank expression, letting him take the next step. His crooked little grin actually started to falter after a while.

“Seriously Kyra, what happened?” There were anger and accusation in his voice, definitely, but there was something else as well, something you weren’t sure how to place, something like hurt. He was no longer grinning at you, but looking you up and down, a serious expression on his face. You felt a wave of annoyance at him and at yourself for coming here. Out of all the places that you could have run into him this was the most likely, and yet you had come here. Idiotic, really.

It was inconvenient that he had seen you. This meant that he would either have to be part of the plan, or you would have to make sure that he wouldn’t say a word about this. Neither option made you particularly happy. You were so caught up in your thoughts about what to do with him that you registered too late that he had moved. Before you could react he had taken three big steps and pulled you into a tight embrace.

Every muscle in your body tensed up and it was sheer shock that kept you from stabbing him. He held you like that, your face pressed against his chest, his hand in your hair and you could feel his heart beat, fast. Then he let you go and stepped away, a curious expression on his face, as you fought to process what had just happened. You turned away, suddenly too tired to be facing him. How did he do that? Tire you so much?

"What happened, Kyra?" he asked again, his voice barely above a whisper.

“A lot of things happened Aidan. I left the Reservoir, and now I’m back. For now.”

That was the simple version.

“That’s all I get? Are you for real? You leave, without a word, and then come back, after three years, with no explanation?”

He was angry now, you could tell, but his anger came as a relief. You had expected anger and hostility, not sudden irrational hugs. Anger you could deal with.

“Yes. That’s all. I don’t believe that I owe you anything more.” And with those words you disappeared, stepping into the shadows and leaving Aidan behind.

You had gone to the hill to find some peace and quiet, so you could clear your head, but after running into Aidan peace of mind was of the table. It was tiring, confronting the past. It was a nasty and exhausting business, but necessary for your plans. There was no other way, if there were you would already have tried it. You needed six gifted, one from each tribe, and the fastest way of achieving that was to collect them here, in the Reservoir. But you couldn’t do it on your own because if the Elders, the old geezers controlling most of the magical community, found out that you were here they would kill you. And then they would find and kill Asha and that was definitely not a part of the plan.

After the incident with Aidan, you paid closer attention to being unnoticeable. You hadn’t come here to relive the past, but to change the future, and that meant that you needed to stay cool and detached, not argue with friends from another life. When you had come back from your little excursion Morgain hadn’t asked any questions, although she had obviously known that something was up. It was the strangest thing. You had so little in common with the girl you had been three years ago, and still she seemed to know you better than you knew yourself. The only other person who’d ever known you like that was Khai.

“Khai.”

You whispered the name as you lay on your bed in Morgains cabin, staring at the ceiling which was painted in beautiful shades of green, giving the illusion of being surrounded by the leaves. Even now the name felt soft as it came over your lips, but the memory that followed was a harsh one. “I’m sorry”, you whispered, for the thousandth time, knowing that it was useless.

There was a soft knock on the door, and then you heard it open.

“Is that really necessary?”, Morgain asked, referring to the darkness gathered in the room. ”It is a beautiful sunny day outside, so why are you sitting in the dark?”

You had collected the thick ink into your room, surrounding yourself with it like a cocoon. It always made you feel better somehow, knowing that no one could see you, touch you or get near you. A safe place.

“I like the colours”, you said dryly and sat up, dispersing the darkness. It fled into the shadows of the room, letting in the light and warmth of the sun. “Have you been successful?”

“I have. Or at least I think I have. Most of them are either unhappy with the way things are, which is unsurprising, or hungry for an adventure that could gain them fame or fortune. None of them know about you, so you’re going to have to be careful about the way you approach them… “

You nodded, grateful for all she had done. It wasn’t an easy task to find six people who were willing to risk their lives, and keep quiet about it. But you had known that you could trust Morgain to pull it off. She always came through.

“Thank you.”

She just smiled and sat down on the bed next to you.

“Any time Kyra, you know that. I hope you’ll find what you’re looking for… and that it’s worth it.” She looked at you and you saw a thousand years of wisdom there, in those forest green eyes. You shivered. Sometimes you forgot how old she was, how much she had seen.

“It is… Believe me. You know what I am... what Asha is... This is the only hope I have. Unless you think that the Elders will suddenly change and see reason.”

The laugh that escaped you was harsh and humourless

"No, I do not believe that they will. I see that you must do this, but I want to make sure that you are aware of the consequences."

"I am."

She nodded, squeezed your shoulder gently and left the room, leaving you to think about what was ahead.

The evening approached quickly, and you felt a certain anxiety build up in your chest. It all depended on these six people. Once they saw you, there was no going back. If any of them said a word about what you were planning you would have the entire council of Elders on your back, and that would make it nearly impossible to complete the quest. So you paced up and down in your room, readying yourself for the big moment.

Morgain had arranged to meet them in her garden at 8 o’clock. It was the perfect place, because it was magical, which was kind of Morgain’s thing. She didn’t really like ordinary. It would keep out any uninvited guests and, if needed, it would keep in those who might betray you. You were hoping that it wouldn’t come to that. If need be you would make them join the quest, but you would rather have them on your side out of their own free will. That way you would feel a lot less guilty. You looked at the clock. Five more minutes. You took a deep breath, melted into the shadows and descended into the gardens below.

The first to enter was an unusual girl with black hair full of colourful streaks and lilac eyes. She distant, yet nervous, constantly looking over her shoulder, muttering under her breath and playing with the hem of her shirt. Her pale faces seemed very young, maybe seventeen, if that, but there was something in her eyes that made you shiver. The seemed to see too far. You shook off the chill that ran down your spine as you watched her look around nervously, her eyes passing right over you. So the first person Morgain got you wasn't quite right in the head. Perfect.

A couple arrived next and you nearly gasped when you saw them enter, hand in hand. Lynn and Ethan, your best friends. What had Morgain been thinking? These were the last people you wanted to endanger. Lynn was standing tall, her auburn hair braided elegantly. She had the same beautiful grace about her that you remembered, the same centred strength. She did not look confused at all, just wary. She knows, you thought and closed your eyes. If she knew that you were here she would never let you go without her. And the same could be said for Ethan. He was standing beside her, all tall blonde and green eyed; a small smile on his lips that you suspected never went away. He would never let Lynn go on her own, and he would want to be there for you too. Kind and loyal as he was. It was good to see them, but you wished they weren’t there. You wished they were far away.

Your thoughts were interrupted when two more people entered the gardens. One you recognized, it was sweet little Megumi, a friend from another life, the other you had never seen before. It was a man, a little older than you, with pure white hair, and eyes as pale as ice. His face was pulled into a little sneer as he looked around at the other people. He was the first to speak.

“And here I thought I was special”, he said in a mocking tone. His voice was deep, rumbling, and somehow feral.

“Not particularly”, Lynn said dryly.

He just rolled his eyes and crossed his arms over his chest, leaning against the house wall. None of the others said anything. Megumi stood with Lynn and Ethan, both towering over her, the creepy girl and Ice boy stood alone, keeping their distance from everyone. Her, staring into space, her lips trembling and he with narrow eyes, taking in every inch of the garden. His eyes swept over the spot where you were hiding, lingered and moved on again.

You tried to figure out who held which key. Ethan and Lynn you already knew, earth and water. If you remembered correctly then Megumi was air, but the other two you had never seen before in your life. Either they were new, or you had just never paid much attention to them. Both options were very possible. The creepy girl was hard to place, due to her unconventional outfit. She could have been fire, but the attitude didn't fit, she lacked that fierceness in her eyes. And Ice boy? Well if you had to guess you would have said that he was a child of the Moon. Cold, distant, and very dangerous. You had never trusted Olea’s children. An idea crossed your mind, and you studied ice boy a little more closely, remembering the way his eyes had lingered near you just a little bit too long. What if? No, that was very unlikely, and so you put the thought out of your mind. There was still one person missing.

You should have known. Maybe you even did, about a split second before he walked through the gate, like a warning bell in the back of your mind, but it was too late. Aidan had already walked into the garden, dark and tall, his fiery presence drawing everyone’s attention. As always, everyone looked at him as he walked in, a wide smile on his handsome face. He walked right up to Lynn and Ethan, putting his arms around their shoulders. “What’s up?”

It made you feel a little better that they just rolled their eyes at him and ducked away from his embrace. Well, at least now you knew what tribe the creepy one belonged to. She was a child of Kokob, goddess of the stars. That explained quite a lot actually.

Everyone was here and it was time to make yourself known, but first you had to make sure that no one ran off on you. Morgain had said that these guys were all ready to join the quest, and with Lynn and Ethan you had no doubts that they would do it, just for you, but with the rest of them you weren’t so sure. Especially with Aidan, you didn’t trust him. With a couple quick moves, you wove a net out of the night surrounding the group, making it thicker, tighter. To them nothing had changed, all looked the same, but if they should try to make a run for it, or just walk away, they would find that it wasn’t so easy. Once you were done and satisfied with your work, you slowly unravelled the darkness surrounding you and stepped into the garden.

Megumi was the first to notice you. She looked at you with big eyes and opened her mouth in surprise as she recognized you. Aidan blinked, looking confused, and yet he must have been expecting something of the sort, as you had simply disappeared up on the hill. He recovered quickly and gave you a wary look. “I should have known that you were behind this”, he said, his voice sounding mocking, but there was a seriousness in his eyes that didn’t fit the tone.

Lynn went completely still, eying you carefully, taking you in. You hadn’t spoken in three years, not a word, and you felt small under those blue eyes. You had to fight the urge to slump. You weren’t afraid of many things anymore, but the confrontation with Lynn that was sure to follow was not something you were looking forward to. Ethan, bless his heart, smiled at you and looked as if he wanted to hug you, but wasn’t sure if you would let him. He looked at you for a while and then a shadow fell over his face, as he saw something in your face. You didn't know what but if it kept him away for the moment then you were grateful for it. The creepy girl gave a tiny little gasp, her eyes wide in surprise while Ice Boy just raised an eyebrow as if he’d known you were there all along. It occurred to you that he just might have. Something was different about this boy. He was the first to speak. “Who are you?” His voice was surprisingly hostile for someone who had just met you.

All eyes were on you and so, after waiting another moment, you started to speak, your voice cold and detached, your eyes fixed directly on Ice Boy, staring him down. “I’m the reason why you’re here and I will be leading the quest. I assume that you being here means that you want to be a part of this, if not then get out now.”

The words were as harsh as you had meant them to be and you waited for anyone to try and leave. It would make things more complicated if someone did, but you would rather they left before you revealed yourself, and not after. Once they knew who and what you were, it would be too late to let them leave, and that would be messy. No one left.

“Wait a second! We don’t even know who you are, and Morgain hasn’t said much about what this quest will entail, so how can we know if we want to leave or not.”, Ice Boy exclaimed, his voice harsh and angry.

“He's right, you know”, a soft, dreamy voice added looking bored, “We have no reason to trust you. We don’t even know your name.”

You nodded, your face still an emotionless mask, ignoring Lynn, Ethan and Aidan’s bewildered looks. No one needed to know how anxious you were about this; if one of them left the quest would be off. “If Morgain told you what we’re after then you’ll understand that this is a sensitive topic and not something that the Elders should hear about too soon. As for who I am, my name is Kyra and I used to be a member of the Reservoir. I left three years ago, and now I’m back. That’s who I am. As for the quest. You know what we’re going after, and for that I need each one of you. It can only be done when there’s a member of each clan because only they can retrieve the keys. This is not something I can do alone, and it’s not something I want to do alone either. This will benefit all of us. So I’ll say it one last time. Are you with me or not?”

You sat on a bench in Morgain’s garden, long after they had left. In the end, all of them had agreed to join. Some of them were still hesitant and you would have to make sure that they didn’t go blabbering about this to anyone. You had noticed how everyone in the group was a loner of sorts, disapproved off by the elders. All but Lynn and Ethan, who had always been popular. They had tried to speak to you once you had sent the others away to pack, but you had disappeared into the shadows again, not quite ready for them, and so they had left. They shouldn’t be a part of this, you thought, closing your eyes and sighed. You felt tired, not physically, but mentally, exhausted by the lies. “What are you sighing for?”, Morgain asked as she sat down next to you on the bench. She smelled like fresh rainfall.

“I’m not sighing”, you said, a little defensive. You loved Morgain, but after so much time being on your own and taking care of yourself, it was hard to let someone worry about you for a change. She just chuckled.

“Alright, you didn’t sigh. But what’s troubling you?”

“Why Lynn and Ethan? Why did it have to be them? They are happy, they have a life, and they shouldn’t be a part of this. I didn’t even want them to know that I was here. I wanted them to live their lives, be happy. Why did you ask them?” There was anger in your voice as you looked at her accusingly. She should have known better. These were good people; they didn’t deserve to get pulled into this mess.

"They already knew that you were here, and once they knew that, there was nothing I could do.”

Of course. Aidan must have told them. You took a deep breath to calm yourself. “I’ll talk to them. I owe them at least that much I suppose.”

The lights were still on within the cabin and you could hear raised voices through the door. They seemed to be arguing, or at least Lynn was. That made you smile. She’d always been hot headed whereas Ethan was always calm and steady. He was good for her. You raised your hand to knock on the door and then hesitated when you heard fragments of their argument. They were talking about you.

“I don’t see a reason why we should? She comes back after three years, THREE YEARS, and not a word of where she’s been! Hell, she's acting as if she doesn't even know us! And that after all she put us through?”

You felt sadness course through you at Lynn’s words. She was right, this wasn’t fair, but there was no going back. No changing the past.

“I know … But we haven’t heard her story yet. The girl we knew wouldn’t have left without a good reason, we both know so. Give her the chance to explain herself. She’s probably feeling just as emotional as you are.”

Typical Ethan, kind and reasonable as always, but, in this case, he was wrong. You couldn’t afford to be emotional about his, you had to do what was best for you, for Asha, and as much as you hated having them involved in this, now that they were you would not let them get away anymore. They had been your friends in a different life, in this life they were a risk that you would have to deal with if needs be. With that cheerful thought, you knocked on the door. It was Ethan who opened the door, a surprised expression on his face as he recognized you. “Kyra?” Lynn appeared in the door, her arms folded over her chest, her face stormy. Neither of them said anything, and so it was up to you to make the first step. Oh well, you thought, I’m already here.

“Can I come in? I’d like to tell you why I left.”