By Frenzy I Ruin (Sins of the Fathers Book 5)

I didn’t bother reminding him of the no-smoking policy of the place. He knew.

His body tensed briefly, then he slanted me a hard look, but at least he relaxed.

“Are you okay?” I asked.

He’d removed his tie and speared it with his knife and impaled it into the hardwood floor. His jacket had been tossed to the floor beside him. His sleeves were rolled up to his elbows, revealing his muscled arms and the Camorra tattoo.

“I came here to stop myself from starting a bloody wedding. Although, that would have been an improvement.”

I stopped beside him, unsure if I should sit down or stay where I was. Did Nevio even want me around? “Greta looks happy.”

Nevio took the cigarette from his mouth and moved it to his forearm. He hissed when the glowing tip touched his skin.

I dropped to my knees. “Don’t!” I reached for the cigarette and gasped when my fingertip touched the still hot tip. I jerked away. Nevio extinguished the cigarette then grabbed my hand and inspected my fingertip, which started blistering. I sank my teeth into my lower lip from the burning sensation.

He shoved to his feet and pulled me up as well. After he’d picked up his knife and stuffed it into a holster at his belt, he took my hand again and led me away. I wasn’t sure where he was taking me. “There’s an ice dispenser,” I pressed out as we passed a room with one.

“Too cold. The water should only be slightly colder than room temperature.”

We arrived at the spa, and Nevio turned on the faucet in the women’s changing room. As soon as the cold water hit my finger, I felt a moment of relief, but then the burning returned.

“What about you?” I asked, nodding toward the blister on his forearm. It must hurt worse than my wound, considering he’d touched the cigarette far longer to the spot.

“I think this is only the third time I’ve seen you in a dress,” Nevio mused. I had opted for a teal-colored, long V-neck dress. It showed a little cleavage but was still modest. Dad wouldn’t have let me wear it otherwise. I shrugged. “It’s a wedding. Even I don’t wear overalls at weddings.”

Nevio released my hand. “It’ll still hurt for a few days. Next time, don’t get between me and a cigarette.”

“You shouldn’t hurt yourself.”

Nevio gave me a challenging smile. “Why not? I thought I could have some fun at this wedding.”

“Burning yourself is your version of fun?”

His smile became darker, and my belly dropped in the most unexpected way, my body flooding with heat. Why was a glimpse at Nevio’s sinister side having such an effect on me?

“I have different versions of fun, Rory. None of them are feasible at this wedding. My father made himself very clear about that.”

“Can’t you just have fun like other people?” I asked, cringing at how Goody Two-shoes I sounded. Nevio’s answering eyebrow-arch confirmed it. He motioned for me to follow him through a white door saying “pool.”

He held it open for me, his eyes on me the entire time as I swished past him in my dress, and even as I found myself in the massive indoor swimming pool area of the hotel, I could still feel his gaze resting on my back. The look in his eyes wasn’t one I’d seen before, and I couldn’t decipher what it meant.

“Then let’s have fun like normal people, Rory. Maybe you can teach me a thing or two about it. I can’t wait,” he said in a low voice as he stepped around me, his arms making a sweeping motion like a ringmaster handing the arena over to the next show act.

I blinked up at him, feeling on the spot. Nevio was only three years older than me, but so often, I felt like a stupid little girl around him. A world of experience and darkness lay between us.

“We…” I looked around, and my eyes finally settled on the serene water surface. “We could go swimming.”

Amusement crossed Nevio’s face. “Do you hide a bathing suit beneath your dress?” He lowered his voice further, and a hint of condescension entered his tone. “Because I doubt you mean skinny-dipping.”

Swimming naked with Nevio? The mere thought made me flush and sweat. I’d often fantasized about this, but now that an option had presented itself, nervousness overcame me.

Nevio chuckled. “I’m joking, Rory. Don’t get your virginal cotton panties in a twist.”

Embarrassment and anger mingled in my body. “Someone could come in. We could swim in our underwear.” I gave a shrug as if it wasn’t a big deal. That was pretty much like being in a bathing suit, right?

Nevio raised one eyebrow and stepped back, beginning to unbutton his shirt, revealing a body that had featured in my darkest fantasies. Muscles and scars, so much strength. Nevio wasn’t just appearances, not like many posers and fitness models on social media. Every bit of muscle served a purpose. Impressing others was only the cherry on top. I knew because of the fight trainings I’d watched. So far, I hadn’t been allowed to see a real cage fight, though.

I pushed off my high heels. Then I reached for the zipper on the side of my dress. My belly flipped when I pulled it down and slipped the straps off my shoulders. Tugging at the dress, my strapless bralette, almost the same color as my dress and adorned with lace, came into view. I was glad I’d convinced Mom to go underwear shopping with me for the wedding because my underwear drawer had been filled with the aforementioned virginal white cotton panties. I’d have hated to confirm Nevio’s suspicions. I wanted to surprise him, to show him that I was more than tomboy Rory. I was a woman who knew what she wanted, even if she had trouble showing it in a non-embarrassing way.

Nevio watched me as he opened his belt. I hoped he couldn’t see my fingers shaking as I pulled down my dress the rest of the way, revealing the teal-colored floral lace panties. The lace wasn’t really sheer, but suddenly, I was worried about how much Nevio would be able to see of me. Did my pubic hair shine through? I’d trimmed it and it was dark blond, so maybe it wouldn’t.

I straightened even as my body flooded with heat and the desire to bolt. Nevio was already only in tight black boxer trunks. I motioned at the pool, hoping my skin wasn’t as red as it felt. “Ready to jump in?” My voice sounded strange to my own ears, a little rough and scratchy.

Nevio came up to me, and I wasn’t sure what to do with my arms. I crossed them loosely over my belly, completely overwhelmed by the situation. Why was I acting like this? I’d been in a pool with Nevio countless times before. My bathing suit didn’t really cover much more. But it had been different. We’d never been alone, and underwear just held a different level of intimacy.

Nevio dove into the pool headfirst in perfect form, barely stirring up the calm surface. I stepped closer to the edge, shivering when my toes touched the water. It was colder than expected, and immediately my skin pimpled. I scanned the elegant pool landscape with the white stone columns and view over New York.

Nevio’s head emerged from the water, and he tossed it back, sending droplets of water flying. A few wet, black strands fell into his face. His dark eyes took me in, and I wished I knew what was going through his head. “Your body will get used to the cold.”

I sank down on the edge and pushed my legs up to my knees into the water. I was a warm water kind of girl. No cold showers or ice baths for me.

Nevio swam over to me, and I braced myself, worried he’d pull me in. Instead, he grabbed the edge and pushed himself up, catching me completely off guard. “I was really considering killing off some Famiglia asshole when you found me. As always, Rory, you make your name proud, bringer of light in the dark.” His biceps flexed as he pushed himself higher until his face was level with mine. My heart stopped, only to pound harder a moment later. Rivulets of water ran down his forehead and cheeks, over the curve of his smirking mouth. Would he kiss me?

But his lips passed my nose, and he pressed a kiss to my forehead. He exhaled before he dropped back into the water with a splash. Cold droplets hit my face. They didn’t help with the heat in my cheeks.

A kiss on the forehead.

I wanted to scream in utter frustration. And bringer of light? I knew Dad also saw me as inherently good, a light in their dark world, which was why he and Mom had picked my name, but I didn’t like to be seen like that. It put a massive burden on my shoulders to live up to their expectations.

“I didn’t know we were having a water party,” Alessio said.

My head swiveled around to where he stood in the doorway. His eyes met mine, and he raised an eyebrow. I pushed off the edge and lowered myself into the water. I needed to cool down. If it hadn’t ruined my hair, I would have dunked my head too, but that would be difficult to explain to my parents.

“What happened to you?” Nevio asked, swimming over to the spot where Alessio stopped near the pool’s edge.

I hadn’t noticed before, but Nevio had a point. Alessio looked ruffled. His dark-blond hair was all over the place. His shirt buttoned the wrong way, with a few missing buttons. And his fly was open. He hadn’t looked that way when we’d danced.

“Uhh,” I began, but Nevio was quicker. “Don’t release the kraken on us, all right?”

Alessio looked down his body but didn’t seem the slightest bit embarrassed about his predicament. He gave Nevio a pointed look. “As long as you keep your kraken in check, we should be fine.” He popped open the button, then kicked down his pants and got out of his shirt before he too jumped into the pool, not bothering to be careful.

Water flew everywhere and barely missed my hair. I’d definitely get in trouble with my parents tonight. I could feel it. Though maybe I could say it was my way to keep the wedding peaceful. Nobody could argue that a wedding without Nevio and Alessio was far likely to escalate.

The guys exchanged a look that made it clear whatever had happened to Alessio wouldn’t be discussed with me around.

I swam toward the closest ladder.

“Where are you going?” Nevio asked.

“I should probably return to the party. Mom and Dad will wonder where I am. I don’t want to get in trouble.”

I climbed out, grabbed my dress from the floor, and quickly rushed into the changing room. I locked myself in, then let out a shuddering breath. A kiss on the forehead, as if I was ten. I was almost eighteen, but Nevio treated me like his little sister. God, did he really see me as his kid sister? I closed my eyes. Taking a shuddering breath, I opened my bra. It was too wet. There was no way I could wear it under my dress. The fabric of my dress fell in ripples over my chest, so it shouldn’t be too obvious that I wasn’t wearing anything beneath.

I got out of my panties too but wrung them out, then put them back on even if the sensation of the cold, damp material was awful. I simply couldn’t imagine returning to the wedding without panties. The material clung to me in an uncomfortable way, but I still put on my dress.

When I stepped out of the changing room, Nevio was waiting in front of it. I touched my heart.

“You’re dripping,” he said, his eyes on the floor.

I followed his gaze. Indeed, a few droplets of water gathered at my feet. The panties were still too wet.

“Your dress will be soaked as soon as you sit down.”

I cringed. That would look as if I’d peed myself. Nevio stepped up to me. “Just get out of your panties. Nobody will know. Your dress is long. It would look suspicious if you dripped water all over the floor under your dress.”

I stepped back into the changing room and got out of my panties as well, then returned with my bra and panties in hand to Nevio. I had left my purse at the table, so there was nowhere I could put my underwear.

“Here, let me take this from you. I can get rid of them later.”

Nevio took my bra and panties from me, catching me off guard.

I swallowed, unable to get past the fact that Nevio was holding my panties. Again, I had dreamed of that moment several times, but never like this. Not even close. A hysteric laugh crowded in my throat.

Alessio appeared beside us at that moment. I knew he interrupted us on purpose. What was it with his savior complex? Since when was he so concerned about me being around Nevio?

He glanced at my underwear in Nevio’s hand and then at my face. “You realize how your father would react if he saw Nevio with your underwear.”

“Dad doesn’t know what kind of underwear I own,” I muttered, annoyed.

Nevio gave me a wink before he walked back to the pool with my underwear.

“You’re very bad at following advice,” Alessio murmured in my ear.

Nevio regarded us with narrowed eyes as he sank down on the edge of the pool and put my underwear on the floor beside him. Sᴇaʀᴄh thᴇ (F)indNƟvᴇl.ɴet website on Gøøglᴇ to access chapters of novels early and in the highest quality.

“I’m only bad at following bad advice.”

I quickly left the pool area, and after catching my breath in the hallway for a moment, I decided to return to the party. When I entered the ballroom where the festivities took place, I felt on the spot, even if nobody paid me close attention. Just the knowledge that I wasn’t wearing underwear was enough to turn me into a jumpy mess.

I hurried to our table and sank beside Isabella, who scribbled in a small notebook but stashed it in her purse when she noticed me. “You look flustered,” she said curiously.

“So do you.” Her cheeks were flushed, and her freckles stood out more than usual, plus her hair was no longer in an updo.

We stared at each other for a few heartbeats before we both nonverbally decided to change the topic and switched to my plans of working as a nurse.

We obviously both had secrets we didn’t want to share.

Nevio

“I hope you’re not thinking about keeping that,” Alessio said with a nod toward Rory’s underwear as he strode toward me.

“For someone who looks like he had a wedding fuck, you’re terribly ill-tempered.”

“And for someone who sees Rory as an almost sister, you’re awfully interested in her panties.”

“For someone who pretends to see her the same way, you’re awfully invested in her possible sex life.” I pushed to my feet and looked him straight in the eye. “Maybe your concern stems from a carnal desire, my friend.”

Alessio laughed. “Don’t turn this on me. We both know I don’t see Rory that way.”

“Me neither,” I said with a shrug.

“You used to be a better liar. You need to work on that before you become Capo.”

“You sound like a Consigliere,” I taunted.

“But I’m not, and I won’t be. Some things aren’t meant to be. I’m not fit to be a consigliere. I know my limits. Maybe you should start considering yours.”

“Limits are there to be broken down.”

Alessio shook his head. “Not every limit. Some limits are worth being honored, especially if they are meant to protect the people who deserve our protection.”

I rolled my eyes. “I’ll behave, but don’t pretend you’re against becoming Consigliere because you want to protect others. You’re being a prissy because of completely irrelevant circumstances.”

“Blood isn’t irrelevant.”

“The only time I care about blood is when it runs over my hands and fills the air with its metallic scent.”

Alessio chuckled. “You’re the craziest fucker on this planet.”

“Not crazy enough to get it on at a Famiglia wedding. You know they honor their virgins.”

Alessio didn’t say anything.

I let out a whistle. “Don’t tell me you really banged a virgin?”

Still nothing. Alessio had a good poker face if he wanted to. “You’re being awfully secretive about this.”

“Let’s go back to the party.”

I shook my head with a chuckle. Knowing Alessio, he’d probably fucked some neglected MILF, not an honored virgin. Always working on his karma.

I got dressed, and then I grabbed Rory’s underwear. Under watchful eyes, I tossed away her bra, hoping he hadn’t noticed how I’d stuffed her panties into my pants pocket. I’d long given up figuring out the reasoning behind my actions, so I didn’t even try this time.

It was three in the morning when I finally gave up on sleep and decided to leave the hotel before I accidentally killed a Famiglia soldier and caused another war. I needed to let off some steam. I particularly needed to keep my mind busy and as far away from what Amo and Greta were currently up to.

I short-circuited a motorbike I found in the underground parking of the hotel and left the premises with smoking tires. I didn’t care if this was one of the Famiglia’s bikes. There was a high chance that this belonged to either Matteo, Maximus, or Marcella’s biker boy, all of them people I loved to piss off in whatever way I could. Stealing a ride for the night was one of the lesser transgressions I could commit, considering the rage I was feeling. I bought a bottle of cheap vodka on the way to a part of the city where most people didn’t want to be stranded at night. Those were usually the places where the most fun could be had. I doubted Luca would get his panties in a bunch if I killed off the scum of his city. And if he did. Oh well.

Two hours later, I sat in a puddle of warm blood on the dirty floor of a biker meetup. Beside me on the ground, a biker took his last gurgling breaths, blood spurting out of his chest and throat wounds. I dropped my phone on the floor after I’d told Fabiano to pick me up. His voice still echoed from the speakers, but I wasn’t listening.

I tried to count how many I’d killed, but it was a mess. I regarded the samurai sword in appreciation. It was my first time using one. I should probably thank the owner of the pub for having it on his wall. But I suspected he was among the chopped-up bodies around me.

Most of the events after I’d stepped into the establishment were blurry or blacked out. Sometimes when my fury rose too high and my blood lust took over, I became too frenzied to remember details.

I hung my head, the alcohol really taking effect now that my adrenaline and blood lust had ebbed away. I was battling unconsciousness. Dammit. The sound of police sirens made me tense.

“Fuck it,” Fabiano muttered as he stepped inside, pushing a chopped-off calf out of the way with the bottom of the door.

I lifted my head to meet his gaze, even if it felt too heavy.

Fabiano stood in the center of the bar, still in his wedding suit, and he looked royally pissed.