Boss's Sweet Secretary

The diary was from more than ten years ago, it was thick with stories about a year in the life of a gentle-tempered housewife who swallowed her love and hatred silently. Hans flipped open a page randomly and what he read was depressing.

"When the car stopped, I wanted to pick up Thomas with an umbrella. He got sick easily, he would cough if he got wet in the rain, and he would suffer for a long time. But through the window, I saw the vivacious woman in the car laughing and talking into his ear. And on his face was a relaxed and happy expression that I had not seen for a long time. I knew that our relationship had probably come to an end." On a Friday evening 11 years ago, Thomas came back from a dinner party. Alice slept early as usual and he went straight to the study and stayed there the whole night as usual.

" 25th July, Sunny. My mother was seriously ill. When I visited her, I told her that I wanted to separate from Thomas. My mother probably knew something and advised me to not think about it and to keep my family together. It was normal for men to have many women outside. I could do something about it if I were by myself, but I should be thinking about Hansy, who was sent abroad to study since he was a child. My mother said that the woman was still young and she had a daughter. If she married Thomas and have kids with him, there would be no place in the family for Hansy anymore. My mother has more foresight than me. I should stop thinking about getting a divorce..."

"Today is Thanksgiving. Thomas said there's something at the company and did not come back. Hansy called me from abroad and said that his studies there were about to be completed. His grades were excellent and his mentor recommended him to do a Ph.D. directly. I was afraid that Hansy would refuse to come back so I pretended to be angry with him and said that he must return home before Christmas. I was afraid that my body would not hold on for much longer. At least, I should wait for Hansy to return home and hand over the estates that I bought all these years to him."

"December 15th, Gloomy. Hansy returned home today. Thomas went on a business trip. Although he instructed the housekeeper to go to the airport to pick Hansy up, I was still worried. I met the woman by accident at the airport. She was wearing a bright red jacket, behind her was a beautiful girl. I think when she grows up, she will make many men fall in love with her. The woman seemed to know me and wanted to say hi to me. I stumbled out of the airport and stood outside, it was snowing. At some point, the girl stood behind me and gave me an umbrella. She seemed to know everything. I was hurt all over again. Although I have already given in so many times, I still managed to let a little girl trample on my dignity so openly.

His fingers were holding the diary with such force that the veins on the back of his hand bulged as if he were about to pop a blood vessel.

Hans's face darkened little by little. Since half a year ago, Alice's diary reminded him daily that the flirty relationship he had with Jennifer was a complete joke. The so-called admiration was built on his mother's dignity, which he felt very guilty of now.

He still remembered the day when he returned home 11 years ago. He looked for the housekeeper but he was not there to pick him up at the airport. On the outside of the airport, he saw his mother, who was holding a small red umbrella, in a trance. Her shoulder was covered with snow, and her face was pale in her plain beige coat.

"Mom, why are you here? Where is the housekeeper? You're not in good health, you shouldn't exert yourself."

At that time, he didn't understand his mother's lifeless expression. He only thought that she was sickly and the cold winter wind had dazed her.

"It's okay, let's go home."

Alice was always gentle, but that day, the first sentence she said to Hans was "go home" with conviction.

The more you wanted something, the harder it was to get it.

During the half a year after Hans returned home, Alice became thinner day by day. She seemed to have recovered a little by Christmas. Even Thomas put down his work and came back to spend time with his family. But in the evening, he answered a phone call and went out. It was also that night when Alice inexplicably threw a tantrum at the servants. She fired all the servants in the family and broke something for the first time.

The doctor already told them that the cancer had spread. It was normal for the patient to be depressed and had extreme mood swings so they should be mentally prepared. Therefore, Hans had already been expecting these to happen.

After the incident, he carried his stick-thin mother back to her room to rest, but she refused to sleep. She kept saying that she didn't have much time, so she asked him to take out the old record player and play it.

The old melody spun from the record player sounded like it could bring people back to a simpler time.

Alice said, "Hansy, if you fall in love with a girl one day, you must love her with all your heart."

At that time, Hans didn't care about love at all, even though he had a few relationships abroad, they were all short-lived.

"Mom, why are you saying this all of a sudden? Did Dad upset you?"

"No," Alice held his hand. "Your father is good, this has nothing to do with him. You are still young, there are many things you still don't understand. I am afraid that you will break a girl's heart one day." "Why? Do you think your son is such an irresponsible person?"

"That's not true." She revealed a rare smile. "I know my son best. He usually looks like he doesn't care about anything, but actually, he cares more than anyone else."

Hans had left home since he was a child, so he actually didn't have much attachment to his parents. He didn't take Alice's words to heart. He pulled up her blanket, trying to be a good son. Then he impatiently wanted to go to the study to look at his project materials. When he was at the door, he heard Alice's words. Later on, when he connected the truth, it felt too cruel and he blamed himself.

"Hans, if you fall out of love with a girl one day, you must tell her clearly and don't hide it from her. A woman's heart is the most sensitive. She can feel whether you like her or not. It's better to break up than lead her on."

At that time, he was too eager to do his own thing and did not realize that Alice called him Hans, not Hansy. He did not realize that Alice wasn't talking to him, she actually said that for Thomas to hear. The night was dark, and the night breeze blew against the window, making a rustling sound.

Hans closed the diary and locked it in the safe. He put his hands in his pockets and walked to the window. He stared at the night sky outside the window, lost in his thoughts. He couldn't tell his anger on Jennifer was because he hated her for not stopping Stephanie from doing bad things, or he hated himself for not being a better son?

It had been more than half a year since he knew what happened back then. The night when he got drunk, Jennifer had sex with him before he had time to process anything. His anger and resentment became worse since he couldn't process his feelings.

He knew that he shouldn't blame Jennifer for what happened back then.

But he knew even better that if he didn't blame Jennifer, he had no reason to be involved with her anymore.