Bonds of Cupidity (Heart Hassle Book 2)

We get the second letter from the Horned Hook a day later.

“We’ll have to go by portal,” Sylred says. “Since we can’t fly.”

“But then Scratch will get left behind,” Evert points out.

“I can fly,” Okot says. “I’ll follow you there and she can go with me.”

“You should stay behind. You can’t be seen,” Sylred points out, but Okot shakes his head.

“No. I’m going. I won’t be caught.”

Sylred looks like he wants to argue, but Ronak gives him a small shake of his head so he drops it.

“I don’t like being separated. What if something happens to her?” Evert asks with a scowl.

“Like what? She can’t get hurt or caught in the Veil,” Ronak points out.

“Trouble follows her,” Evert replies. “What if she gets all cupidy or some shit? Gets distracted, starts blowing Lust all over the place, and shoots Love Arrows up some fae asses? You know how easily distracted she is. Her cupidity shit might sidetrack her, and then she’ll lose track of us.”

I stop playing with the Love Arrow in my hands and frown.

Sylred blinks. “Is that a thing?”

I huff. “No! Well…yes. But right now, no. I’m not gonna get caught up in my own stupid cupidity. I’m not a goldfish. I do have an attention span.” I continue to twirl the arrow through my fingers like it’s a baton. “And I resent you thinking—Oh, look!’ I exclaim excitedly, zooming toward the window. “That fae down there is riding a unicorn!”

Okay. I see his point.

“We need to go,” Ronak says behind me. “We’re wasting time.”

“Fine,” Evert says. He snaps his fingers in the air and looks around for me. “Scratch. You’d better be here listening to us right now. But if you’re on some flirty tangent or whatever the shit you cupids do, then I’ll leave a map on the bed, too, just in case. If you are here, which you’d better be, follow your fucking lamassu. Tell Okot how to get there, Syl.”

“We need to get to Icidel,” Sylred explains. “You know it?”

Okot tips his head. “I have heard of it.”

“It’s not far from here. All you’ll have to do is fly directly up from this island. You’re going to pass about five or six islands above until you find one that’s covered in ice and snow. It’ll be a bit north. There are a lot of mountains on it, and the island should stand out from the rest. We’ll meet you at the base of the tallest mountain.”

“I understand.”

“And Emelle?” Sylred says, looking around awkwardly at the empty space in the room. “Send one of us a Lust-Breath when you get there so we know you’re with us. I know that Okot can sense you, but we want to be sure. We can’t do whatever is going to happen without you there.”

I force myself to turn away from the window and salute him. ‘Aye, aye, captain.’

The genfins waste no time leaving the room and heading out to the city to find a portal. Only high fae have the ability to open portals, and even then it’s a rare power. I follow them to the portal shop in the center of town, and man, is this place fancy.

The inside has marble floors and gilded walls, there’s a musician playing softly in the corner, and a table has little finger-foods and bottles of fairy wine set up on it.

At the back of the room, there’s a high fae reading a book and looking utterly bored and too good for everything in the entire realm. He doesn’t even look up from reading when the genfins walk in.

Ronak, Evert, and Sylred stand like a wall in front of him. When the fae continues ignoring them, Sylred takes the lead. ‘Good day. We’re here for a portal.”

The fae sighs and turns a page. “Obviously. Gold first then talk.”

Ronak looks like he’s about to punch him, but Sylred quickly tosses a pouch of money at his head. The fae catches it with much more dexterity than I expected. He still hasn’t looked up from his book.

He tosses the pouch back and forth in his hands, as if he can deduce it’s worth simply by holding it. Looking around his gold-gilded storefront, I realize that he probably can.

“Fine. How many and where to?” he says, finally standing up and putting his book down. He holds his place with a golden coin. Now that’s an expensive bookmark.

“Three of us. We need a portal to Icidel and back.”

“Fine,” he says again, as if it’s a huge inconvenience and not, you know, his job. “I’ll keep it open for one hour.”

With a flick of his wrists, some swirling blue and white appears in his hand, and with a flourish, he spreads it until it stretches from floor to ceiling. He takes his seat again and picks up his book to resume reading as the guys step through and disappear.

As soon as they’re gone, I float to the alleyway behind the building where Okot is waiting. When I get near him, he snorts in my direction and jerks his head.

“Yep, I’m with you, big boy,’ I confirm, petting him on the head.

At my touch, he launches into the air, and I follow easily beside him. We go up, up, up, until the city of Highvale is far below us. I count the islands as we go by, but I don’t really need to do that because I can see Icidel far off in the distance. Unlike the other floating islands with rock and soil on the bottom, this one is pure ice.

When we make it to the top, I see incredibly tall mountains and a landscape covered in snow. We easily spot the tallest mountain and make our way to the base of it. I spot my genfins immediately. Granted, it’s not hard since they stand out against the snow.

Okot and I land beside them. While he’s busy shifting back into this man form, I blow some Lust into Ronak’s face. He clears his throat and flushes slightly.

Evert cocks a brow. “I take it she’s here?”

“Yep.”

Evert chuckles darkly. “Let’s go.”

I now notice the small cabin that’s situated at the bottom of the mountain. When they reach the door, Ronak knocks. Well, he more like punches the poor door, making an audible splintering noise as the wood slightly buckles.

When the guys look over at him, he just shrugs. “Whoops.”

Evert rolls his eyes. “Rein the strength power in, yeah?”

Before he can answer, the door flies open and there stands two fae to greet us.

I blink at the sight. “They’re…they’re stuck together at their butts. They’re butt-stuck. At the butt cheeks. They’re naked. Penises. I can see their penises. They’re identical.” For some reason, I feel like this all needs to be said.

I’m having a hard time looking away with them just hanging out in the open like this. “I just…do you think they both poop and pee at the same time? Or does one of them take over for that? What about sex? Or sitting? What happens when one of them wants to sit and the other doesn’t?”

Yeah, I know. I’m rambling again.

“Genfins,” they both say at the same time. It’s weird. “We are Plik—and Plak. Come in. We’ve been expecting you.” Their gazes fall on Okot. “We did not expect you.”

Okot just stares at them all bull-man-y until they shrug and let him go inside, too.

“Umm, should I be concerned that these are the faes that hold my physical fate in their hands?” I ask no one.

I’m practically inside of Ronak as he walks indoors, because the fae penises are looking at me. When in doubt, just stick with the guy with the strength power to protect you from rogue penises. I should put that on a t-shirt.

Aside from being conjoined at the butt cheeks, the fae brothers have deer-ears that swivel on the tops of their heads and they have noses that resemble pig snouts. The brother on the left has one wing, and the brother on the right has another. Flying must be a bitch.

I snap my eyes toward their wooden table when I notice movement. Sitting there with his feet propped up on the table and his hands behind his masked head, is the Horned Hook. The guys notice him, too.

“What the fuck are you doing here?” Evert asks.

He puts his hands and feet down at the same time and sits up straight. “Well, if it isn’t my favorite genfins. I see you found your lamassu,” he says, tilting his head in Okot’s direction. “You’re welcome.”

Evert is about to pop off something when Sylred smacks his shoulder to silence him. “Thank you. But what are you doing here?”

The Horned Hook stands with a flourish. “I am a trader of secrets and a collector of priceless things. You have a female stuck in the Veil. I have never, in all my years, heard of that particular secret, and believe me, I have heard thousands. Count my presence today as the second half of your payment.”

“That wasn’t part of the deal,” Ronak growls angrily as the other guys close in.

“Don’t get your tails tangled,” the Horned Hook says cheerfully. “I won’t tell. This secret is purely for my own curiosity.”

The guys look like they’re considering pummeling him and throwing him off the snowy island, but he just laughs. “Yes, yes, you could try and beat me to a bloody pulp. Four against one and all that. Or,” he waves his hand, making the chairs and table flip over and act as a barrier between them. It’s a good visual of what his telekinesis power is capable of. “I might just beat you four, while ruining some perfectly adequate furniture in the process, which would mean Plik and Plak here would become angry and most likely refuse to help your female.”

The guys exchange a glance. Ronak looks like he still wants to take those odds. The Horned Hook interrupts their silent covey-speak and says, “The third option is to simply let Plik and Plak do what I’ve asked them to do and then we’ll all go on our happy way. Seems the less destructive and violent choice, don’t you think?” he asks, waving his hands around and making all the furniture return to its rightful place.

Okot is the one to answer. “You will not tell anyone about her.” It’s not a question.

The Horned Hook tilts his head. “You have my word.”

Evert gets up in his personal space. “If you break our trust, I will hunt you down and kill you.”

I can’t see behind the mask, but I’m pretty sure he rolls his eyes. “Yes, yes. Maim, torture, death. I know the stakes.”

“Fine,” Ronak snaps. “Let’s get on with it.”