Chapter 38 - Sheriff Green
The ambulance showed up a moment later because they were on standby for the combine derby. They opened the passenger side door and began to check over Natalie.
“Shit! It’s Natalie. Don’t worry Nat. We got you. You’re gonna be all right. Doc Edmunds is on his way.” Small towns I thought to myself, where everybody knows everybody else.
The sheriff came back and opened the drivers side door. “If you please ma’am. You and I need to have a talk. And your dog too if it’s friendly. Do you have a leash for it?”
“She’s smarter than you.” Arlene sniped.
“Ma’am I am about to the end of my patience with you. You endangered the lives of hundreds of people driving the way you did, and interrupting our little celebration with your...” The sheriff trailed off looking at the drivers side of bronco. He noted the blood drenched drivers seat. The peeled back roof. And the bloody samurai sword in the back seat next to me.
His face twitched thoughtfully for a long moment looking Arlene up and down. “What exactly did you say happened?” he started in a different tone. I climbed out and looked back at Sheila with her shot out windows, trail of bullet holes, soft round dent in the door above a bloody slit, and the partially peeled back roof.
“I didn’t say... yet. There are these monsters, for lack of a better word, wearing black body armor and riding little dune buggies. They must be local biker gang? They tried to run us off the mountain pass back there. They shot at us and stabbed Natalie when she wouldn’t let them run us off the road.”
The sheriff stared down at Arlene hard, disbelieving. “You’re saying that bikers ripped open the roof?” Sheila’s wounds stared back in a mute challenge to his disbelief.
He searched Arlene’s face for signs of doubt. Finally, he said, “Come with me.” The sheriff walked around the front and stood next to the ambulance. Natalie was on the gurney with tubes and fluids hooked in, a mask over her face. Her color a little better.
The sheriff leaned in close, “Natalie what the hell is goin’ on?”
“Monsters” Natalie whispered.
The sheriff stared down at her, his brow furrowed. He slowly turned and stared hard at Arlene and then at me. “That is the ugliest dog I’ve ever laid eyes upon. What breed is that?”
“Awuuuuuoooo!” one of the dogs in the grandstand began to howl.
The sheriff rolled his eyes, “Get her outta’ here we got a derby to finish.” Arlene and I moved to get into the ambulance as they loaded up. “Just where do you think you’re goin’?”
“I was going to...”
“We ain’t established yet where you should be goin’. Or where are the so called monsters to which she was referring to... and now I’m gonna miss this derby heat on account of you two nutters.” The sheriff was getting exasperated and was still glancing confusedly at the bronco.
“You think I stabbed her through the door with a samurai sword, ripped open the roof with my bare hands, shot up the car, and then drove her into town in an effort to, what? Get away with it? Is that what you figure, chief?”
“I don’t rightly know what happened. T’aint never happened here before. So maybe I’ll just gather evidence until I think of something better to do.”
Doc Edmunds ran up, a slightly grizzled man in his 60′s wearing a John Deere hat, lime green polo shirt, and jeans. His neck was sunburn red, and he smelled faintly of mustard. He took one look at Arlene and I and focused on Natalie checking her vitals and reassuring himself that the EMT’s had properly treated her.
“Awww, c’mon,” muttered the sheriff under his breath as he noticed who was approaching.
Two men strolled up with the ease of a farmers who had see it all: one with a ten gallon hat, stick legs, and a belly that had sagged down over his large belt buckle years ago, and another with a sloping forehead covered with a ball-cap, a wireless microphone, and a removable set of either shiny white teeth or a whole box of white Chiclets gum.
The ten gallon hat started,“Where are we at Sheriff? Can we restart the heat?”
The sheriff turned away in obvious frustration, “Chuck, I want the heat to continue as much as anybody else. We just have procedures to follow. Evidence and such, my job to do an’ all.”
The shiny teeth flashed, “Well sheriff, we got hundreds of sponsors waiting on you.” I recognized the resonant tones from the incomprehensible public announcements.
The sheriff glared back at shiny teeth with a scowl, but the plastic smile never wavered.
“Best get it wrapped up then. I’ll be in the booth,” said the ten gallon hat.
The sheriff watched the ten gallon hat swagger away. Suddenly, all the dogs were up and howling. “Awwww, shut up will ya’!” barked the sheriff.
The shiny teeth turned and flipped his mic on as he walked back towards the booth, his voice amplified in the mini stadium. “We’ll be startin’ back up in a moment folks. Sheriff Greene is finishing up his investigation. How ’bout a big hand for Sheriff Greene for making this process so quick, so we can get back to the Derby!” I imagined the teeth swimming around in his mouth. There was muffled applause for Sheriff Greene to which he growled under his breath.
“Doc keep an eye on these two, I’ll come get their statement after the derby. You two go with doc,” and with that the sheriff motioned us into the back of the ambulance. We pulled away around the giant hulking combine tractors. I peered out the back window of the ambulance.
Just before we rounded the corner around the far gate of the fence, I saw a black shape riding an ATV come into view. I glanced at Arlene but she was looking worriedly at Natalie.