Becoming Honey

The elevator doors opened with an almost casual ding and its three passengers stumbled forwards towards the nearest wall, all requiring its aid to stand. The journey up to the top floor had taken the better part of a minute which might not sound too bad when one considers that they had gone from the bottom of the building right to the top, yet the elevator had risen so quickly that Amber would not have even been able to hazard a guess as to the speed it had travelled, let alone how far up she, Lara and Dan actually were.

“Fuckin’ told you, didn’t I?” said a breathless Dan.

“It’s like that every time?” Amber asked, equally as breathless as her fingers gripped tightly to a wooden door frame.

“Aye, and that’s the reason I normally drop onto the roof and walk down a single flight of stairs,” he replied. “Saying that, shit rarely turns out well when I do that. Figured trying a different tack couldn’t hurt.”

“Maybe not,” said Lara. “I’m pretty sure I left my stomach back in the foyer, though.”

“’Least it’s got company ’cos mine’s down there, too.”

After taking a few more moments to catch their breath, the three made their way down the corridor that stretched out before them. At a glance it appeared to go on forever yet oddly, Amber found that they were able to cover the ground quite quickly and it was not at all long, a matter of seconds really, before they were standing before a rather large set of heavy, wooden doors.

She raised her hand as if to knock upon the door yet before her knuckles were able to make contact with the wood, the doors opened with a click to reveal a rather modest office. Sitting upon the desk, the only visible piece of furniture within, was an incredibly striking, attractive woman. Her long, toned legs were crossed, dangling over the edge in such a manner that meant her bright red heels swung mere inches above the thick pile of the carpet. A pencil skirt, blouse and matching jacket adorned her slender form, and a cigarette hung between her bright red lips as both her hands rested upon the desk behind her.

“All right, Dan?” she asked, the cigarette bouncing merrily along as she spoke. “I see you’ve gone and got yourself a Honey.”

“The Honey, to be precise,” he said, pausing to light a cigarette of his own. “How’s tricks, Ashleigh?”

“Oh you know,” she replied as she uncrossed and crossed her legs in a very Basic Instinct fashion. “Same shit, different reality.”

“Ain’t that the truth? So what’s the deal here?” he asked as he, Amber and Lara took a pew upon a sofa as it rose out of the floor. “Whose side is The Firm on here?”

“The same side we’re always on,” she replied, as she hopped down from the desk and tottered on incredibly high heels towards a seemingly empty space, yet as she began to lower herself to a seated position, an armchair, rather plush in appearance, rose quickly from the floor in much the same manner that the sofa had done.

“Whichever side suits your purposes then, eh?”

“Quite,” she replied. “Can I offer any of you a drink? Beers all around?”

Some time later, after which countless beers had been consumed by all four occupants of the office and the conversation had been about nothing of great import, Amber finally asked the question that they had travelled back through time to ask.

“Well that all depends, Honey,” Ashleigh replied, sweetly, though Amber got the distinct impression that the woman was capable of sweet only on the rarest of occasions. “For what reason do you require a witch?”

“Something called ′The Black,′ is making its way towards Earth as we speak,” she replied and added, to avoid any potential confusion. “In 2014 though, not 1868.”

“The Black? Well that never works out well for anyone,” Ashleigh replied. “Am I to assume that you, Dan, had something to do with its appearance?”

“Aye,” the man replied. “Who’d have thought that destroying a Rah’k fleet with a plethora of temporal folds would results in that fuckin’ thing making an appearance, eh?”

“Silly boy,” she replied, before she tutted and wagged her finger in his direction as a teacher might do to a naughty schoolboy. “Whilst it’s true there’s no way you could possibly have known that opening several temporal folds...”

“...one hundred and seventeen, temporal folds...”

“One hundred and seventeen? That must have taken some doing.”

“Aye, I even had to take a couple of weeks’ holiday after that.”

“I should imagine so, but I digress... Opening one hundred and seventeen temporal folds was always going to have adverse effects in one form or another. It just so happens that in this case, doing so resulted in what is quite possibly the worst case scenario.”

“Pretty sure I couldn’t have put that better myself, Ashleigh,” he replied, shrugging. “So what d’yer reckon? Reason enough to sort me an’ my homegirls out with a wee bit of mystical assistance?”

“I should say so, yes,” the woman replied. “An Earth destroyed by The Black is not an Earth that The Firm wants to see, in any reality.”

“Glad to see we’re on the same page,” said Amber, firmly.

“But of course, such aid comes with a price, even if proffering said aid serves our interests.”

“Figures,” Dan muttered. “What do you want from me this time?”

“From you, Dan,” Ashleigh Dixon replied. “Nothing whatsoever. The price for this is on Honey’s head.”

“Then what do you want from me?” Amber asked.

“Correct me if I’m wrong, Honey, but you are quite new to the role, correct?”

“That’s true, but that doesn’t mean anything.”

“I find that I am almost inclined to agree,” she replied, rather casually. “Almost... But as you’re a relatively new Hardcore Honey, I feel that it is only prudent that you are tested to a level befitting your role. What I mean to say, is that it is all well and good fighting the occasional Amazon and killing a lone Rah’k single handed, but tell me this, Honey... Have you ever fought a demon?”

“How do you..?”

“It is The Firm’s business to know everything, Honey. More than that, it is my business to know everything, especially where so-called heroes are concerned,” she said, smiling the same sweet smile. “But please, do answer my question.”

“Fine,” Amber replied. “No, I have never fought a demon.”

“Ashleigh...” said Dan, the tone of his voice low. “Don’t even...”

“Too late,” she replied as with a click of her fingers, Amber vanished.

“Where have you sent her?” Dan asked, attempting to keep his voice as calm as he could as he turned his head towards Lara. “Don’t worry, I’m certain she’ll be fine.”

“She will be fine, assuming she is as good a Hardcore Honey as any other but as for telling you where she is, I am afraid you will have to await her return to discover that.”

“You’re a bitch, you know that?” said Dan, disgusted. “A right fuckin′ bitch.”

“Ah well, I am certain I shan’t lose any sleep over that,” she replied with a chuckle. “Now, assuming Honey does return to you and her honey, without interference from either of you, you will have the witch you require.”

“And what if she doesn’t? What’re you gonna’ do about The Black then?”

“Exactly the same as what you are going to do,” she replied. “The difference is, of course, that we will have to pay someone to take care of the problem. We can’t have anyone mistaking us for the good guys, after all.”

She stood from the armchair and it returned to its former position, sunken into the floor, as the woman strode over to her desk and resumed her station, sitting upon it with her legs crossed.

“Now, if you’ll excuse me,” she began, “I have to make a call.”

***

Dan did not say so much as a single word as he and Lara made their way back to Orca. He had decided that rather than returning to his ship via a temporal fold, he required the walk to clear his head. Lara was certainly not complaining, either. Of course, she would much rather have been wherever Amber was, offering support as she fought whatever demons she was expected to fight, but she had been with the Agency for long enough to know that there were many, many things that she – or anyone else, for that matter – was unable to control.

Respecting Dan’s obvious desire for silence, she too did not say a word. Instead she took in the sights, sounds and quite often repugnant smells of a London that under any other circumstances, she could not have imagined in all of her wildest dreams. She did expect, though, that the majority of those wild dreams would for evermore consist entirely of Amber, and she wished that the woman she hoped would soon become her lover was there with her, to enjoy the early morning of Victorian London.

“Just to be clear,” Dan said eventually as he and Lara strode across the dew-wet grass of Hyde Park, “we are gonna’ find out exactly where the Dixon bitch sent Honey.”

“How?” she asked. “I mean I’m all for that, totally, but there’s no way we’re going to get any information out of anyone at The Firm.”

“Don’t need The Firm to find out,” Dan replied, waiting for a moment, standing stock still as Orca temporarily disengaged her cloaking device and opened her door, in order to allow the two passage.

“Then who do we need?”

“No one we ain’t already got,” he said with a smile. “Ain’t that right, Orca?”

“I’m sorry?” the vessel replied. “It seems that you assume that I am able to read your mind and that you can simply drag me into a conversation when you’re almost at the punchline, and expect that I’ll instantly know everything you’re talking about.”

“A little grumpy, Orca? Repairs not going as well as you’d hoped?”

“No,” she replied, sharply. “But as you’ve interrupted what I was doing, I might as well do whatever it is that you need me to do, as well as continue to orchestrate my self-repair functions. I swear, the next time you think it’s a good idea to take me out to fight a Rah’k mothership without backup of any kind, I’ll drop the oxygen levels so quickly that you end up in a permanently vegetative state.”

“You know I can’t make any promises.”

“All too well.”

“Right, anyway. I need you to access every single archive you can find. You’re searching for any reference to a girl matching Amber’s description appearing out of nowhere.”

“Yes Sir, right away, Sir.”

“I think you’ve pissed her off,” said Lara, quietly.

“Ain’t the first time and it sure as shit won’t be the last,” he replied with a chuckle. “I’m gonna’ take control, Orca. Reckon we’d be better off occupying a low orbit.”

“I do agree with that, Sir,” the vessel replied in tones far more sincere. “And besides, manual control means that I have one less thing to worry about.”

“Aye, well we’re going up,” he said. “Give us a shout when you’ve got something, eh?”

The vessel offered nothing by way of a reply. She was quite clearly inordinately pissed off with her captain, yet at the same time only too happy to help where she could when it came to preventing a fate worse than death for every single member of the human race – those on Earth, at any rate.

“There’s a few spare bunks if you wanna’ grab some kip,” said Dan, turning to Lara whilst he guided Orca towards the upper echelons of the atmosphere. “Most of them probably got clean sheets, too.”

“I’m pretty knackered but in all honesty, there’s no way I’d be able to sleep,” Lara replied. “Not without knowing that Amber’s OK.”

“Aye, I hear you,” he replied. “Well it’ll probably take Orca a fair few minutes to skim through everything ever written. There’s a crate of beer in the fridge in the galley an’ I dunno’ ’bout you, but I’m starting to feel a wee bit too sober.”

“I could go for a beer,” Lara replied, chuckling. “But just so we’re clear, you’re not getting me drunk and bending me over anything.”

“Duly noted,” he said with a wink, as Lara turned and headed from the bridge in search of the galley.

She found it soon enough, but not before she mistakenly walked into the armoury. The weapons contained therein were numerous in variety and large enough in number to start a small war. Racks upon racks of guns in all shapes and sizes, some of which she recognised and some of which looked to Lara as though they had come straight out of a science fiction movie.

In pride of place, resting upon hooks directly in the centre of the back wall was Dan’s rocket launcher, Betty. There was little else on that wall, save for three katanas spaced evenly below it.

“The guy definitely plans for the worst,” she muttered as she turned to leave and went left. The next door she tried, opened up into the galley, quite a large room considering Dan was Orca’s only official crew, as far as she knew. There was certainly no one else on board, at any rate.

The galley was tidy, impeccably so, which led Lara to assume that it was either never used, or that the regular crew included at least one female, because there was no way the spick and span area in which she currently stood was tended to by a man.

Locating the fridge, she opened it up, removed a couple of beers and then headed out of the galley, allowing the refrigerator to swing shut behind her.

“Took your sweet time,” said Dan as he took a bottle from her grasp. “Wander into the armoury, did you?”

“Yeah, it’s quite the impressive collection you’ve got.” She popped the cap and tipped the bottle to her lips, swigging deeply.

“Aye, well when you’ve been around as long as I have you’re bound to pick up a few knick-knacks on your travels and besides, in my experience it always pays to be well armed.” He paused to pop the cap of his own bottle, and tipped it to his lips whereupon he very nearly drained the beverage in a single sitting. “Don’t seem to make no difference where you go, you always end up bloody firing.”

“Isn’t that a pretty bleak outlook?”

“Mebbe’s, but it’s just the way it is. Ain’t nothing I can do about it.”

“Oh I dunno’, you could try not firing?”

“That’s how you end up dead,” he replied. “Anyways, it’s my thinking that Orca should’ve come up with some information for us by now.”

“Well I was just about to say so, but I didn’t want to interrupt your scintillating conversation.”

“Look, if I take you to a junkyard so we can get all the spare parts you need, rather than your self-repair function having to work overtime, will you drop the attitude?”

“Perhaps,” the vessel replied. “That can wait though, as I have located Amber.”

“Oh aye?” said Dan, lighting a cigarette as he spoke. “Where is she?”

“Well put it this way, I found no reference to her in any human text.”

“That doesn’t sound too fuckin’ clever.”

“It’s not. The only reference I could find to Amber was hidden away in an ages old demon text.”

“Oh, shit,” Dan replied as he slowly shook his head. “Not too clever at all, then. The Firm really don’t like to make shit fuckin’ easy for us, do they?”

“No Sir,” the vessel replied. “They do not.”

***

Amber’s eyes stung; even though she was squinting, the light was simply too bright for her to see anything. Not only that but she was cold, incredibly so, and had she not been so tightly bound she would have been shivering uncontrollably.

“Oh I am sorry.” The voice was female and the words almost genuine, at least that was how they sounded to Amber. “Are my Suns a little bright for your puny human eyes?”

The light grew gradually dimmer until it was at a level she was more used to, however due to the fact she felt as though she had been temporarily blinded, it still took some time for her vision to return to anything that resembled normality.

When it did, Amber found that she was looking out over a harsh, brutal landscape. Jutting rocks and dusty ground were all that she could see for miles; there was not a trace of water or any kind of foliage in sight.

She looked up towards the sky, an off-red in colour but it was not the unusual colour scheme that caught Amber’s attention; that honour went to the seven suns that were glaring angrily down at her. Even more odd than that, they appeared to be positioned in a straight line that ran from one side of the sky to the other.

“Straight off an Iron Maiden album,” she muttered, but then, as she lowered her eyes from the oddest sky she had ever seen, a woman came into her field of vision.

Blonde and slim, she looked as though she belonged on the pages of a magazine rather than wherever the Hell they were. She was simply staring, her lips pursed in a pout.

Amber tried to move, momentarily forgetting that she was somehow bound in a completely helpless position.

“Wouldn’t even bother, if I were you.” Another female voice but from beside her this time, to her right. Amber inclined her head as much as she could and using her peripheral vision, she was just about able to see someone bound just as she was with a single rope around her waist. It was no ordinary rope though, at least assuming that ordinary rope doesn’t glow with a bright, purple light.

Amber lowered her eyes to her own waist and saw that she was bound in exactly the same fashion which led her to wonder what was actually preventing her from moving at all, because the glowing rope was not even tight.

“Well I don’t know where you came from, baby girl,” the slim blonde woman said, approaching in a random, stilted manner. “But that witch should consider herself lucky that she gets to watch you die first. In fact I might even be so satisfied after your death, that she survives... No promises though, as I’m not known for my mercy.”

“I think it’s pretty bad manners that you haven’t even introduced yourself before telling me you’re gonna’ kill me,” said Amber with a smirk. She could feel adrenaline coursing around her body and she was getting angry, which was probably not a good combination for the blonde woman, if the way in which Amber had dealt with the last blonde to anger her was anything to go by.

“My apologies, of course,” the woman cooed as she took several quick, haphazard steps backwards. “I am Lilith and this,” a pause, as she spread her arms as if gesturing to the entire surrounding landscape, “is where I like to spend my Summer vacation.”

“Lilith, eh?” Amber said with a shrug. “First demon created by Lucifer? Adam’s wife?”

“I see you know your folklore, child.”

“What can I say? I watch a lot of TV.” Amber chuckled, though judging by her impassive face, Lilith did not see the joke. “Right, well I suppose I’d better introduce myself, eh?”

With the rope still glowing, hanging limply around her waist, Amber got to her feet, much to the obvious shock and surprise of Lilith.

“How in all of Creation? That rope is imbued with the very fires of Hell itself!”

“Then I guess Hell’s never met anyone like me,” she replied as she took the rope between her hands and snapped it with ease.

“Who the fuck are you?” the still bound woman asked.

“She knows,” Amber replied, her eyes fixated upon Lilith. “Ain’t that right, demon?”

Lilith did not reply, as she was still in a state of shock that Amber had managed to escape.

“Well don’t keep the rest of us in suspense!”

“I’m Hardcore Honey,” said Amber, her voice even and calm. “And today, I’m gonna’ kill me a demon bitch!”

Amber leapt at the demon, twisting in the air as she did so, and drove her shoulder into Lilith’s midriff. Skidding over the dusty ground upon her back, the demon looked up into the eyes of Hardcore Honey in fear. That fear only served to anger her though and she lashed out towards Amber. Even though no contact was made the force of the blow sent her flying, tumbling backwards as she turned end over end as she moved through the air.

“You will not escape me!” Lilith yelled, clasping her hands together in front of her chest. “No one escapes me!”

She drew her hands apart and as she did so three figures appeared beside her, each with their own personal puff of black smoke.

“Kill this bitch!” she yelled. “Kill this bitch, else I’ll see to it personally that Lucifer hears of your failure!”

Clearly, each demon knew that Lilith’s threat was by no means an idle one and in unison the flung themselves at Amber, landing blow after blow about her person and it was all the girl could do to curl herself into a ball in the hope that the position offered some level of protection. Then she saw her way out, a stationary foot left closer to her hand than one who knew who she was would have dared to leave a foot.

Amber reached out and grabbed it, yanking as hard as she could and with a cry of surprise the demon fell to its back. Forcing herself to her feet, despite the blows that were still being delivered, and with the foot grasped tightly between her hands, she spun around repeatedly, taken the demon with her and using it to knock the others out of the way.

Even with the other two demons sprawled upon the ground, Amber did not stop until she was certain that upon releasing the demon, it would continue spinning through the air and crash into Lilith, which is exactly what happened.

“Bitch!” Lilith yelled as she went straight from laying to standing in a single, jerky motion. “Idiots! Use your fireballs.”

Amber dodged the first and ducked the second but she knew that it would not take much more before there were too many fireballs heading towards her for her to be able to avoid, so rather than attempt to dodge the next one, she hit out at it, punching it cleanly and it flew with great speed and precision towards Lilith.

The demon burst into flames the second the fireball hit her in the face and with simultaneous cries of anguish, the other three demons instantly disappeared.

“That was incredible,” the bound woman said as Amber jogged over the ground towards her, taking great care not to slip and twist her ankle upon the rocks. “Seriously, I’ve never seen anyone take out a demon as powerful as Lilith.”

Amber stooped, and taking the rope around the woman’s waist between her hands, she snapped it just as easily as she had dealt with the one that had bound her.

“What she said about you being a witch, is it true?”

“Yeah, it’s true,” she replied, accepting Amber’s offer of a hand to help her to her feet. “I’m a witch all right. Call me Tituba.”

“All right,” Amber replied, ignoring the fact that as she had watched every single episode of American Horror Story, she recognised the name all too well. “In which case we need to go to London, 1868.”