A Million Kisses in Your Lifetime: A Lancaster Prep Novel

THIS ENTIRE DAY has been a complete revelation. Discovering Wren’s many secrets as she reveals them to me, layer by layer, bit by bit. Until she’s laid herself completely bare, and she’s asking me if she should go on dates and let guys touch and kiss her.

Just using the word guys as in plural, sets my blood boiling. I don’t want to see anyone touch her.

Only me.

“That’s up to you,” I finally say, resting my folded arms on the edge of the table. “Do you want to go out with other guys? Kiss them? Let them touch you?”

“I can’t be a virgin forever,” she whispers.

“Not like you need to go out and fuck some random guy on your first go,” I snap, sounding like a jealous asshole.

“I don’t want to do that,” she immediately says. “I just—I’ve had some thoughts lately. Done some things.”

She’s got me curious as fuck with that statement. “Like what?”

Wren rapidly shakes her head, glancing down at the table. “I can’t say.”

“Why not?”

“It’s too embarrassing.” She sounds miserable.

“Come on, Birdy. It’s just me. We’re in a public spot. Surrounded by people. How bad can it be?”

“Promise you won’t make fun of me?” she whispers to the table.

“Look at me.” She glances up, and I keep my expression as neutral as possible. “I won’t make fun of you.”

I would never make fun of her. Not anymore. Not after she’s shared so much with me. She’s been so open. So vulnerable.

“Okay.” A shaky breath leaves her as she glances up at me. She tilts her head left, then right, as if she’s cracking her neck and readying to jump into the ring, primed to fight. “I was alone last night and I—oh God, I can’t say it out loud.”

Her face is crimson. Whatever she did, she’s embarrassed about it. I can only assume a handful of things she could possibly do while alone last night, so I decide to say it for her.

“Did you…touch yourself?”

Her green eyes are wide and fathomless. “Yes.”

My dick twitches. “Did you finger yourself?”

She nods.

“Make yourself come?”

More nodding. “A couple of times.”

Jesus. My dick is hard.

“I watched a porn too. For the first time. All the way through. I mean, I’ve seen stuff. Images. Clips. You know how it is on the internet. You can’t escape the sex stuff. It’s everywhere. But I sat there and watched a twenty-minute video between a man and a woman and it was—it was so hot.” She sounds flustered. As if she’s still aroused just thinking about it.

I shift in my seat. “What did you like best?”

She frowns. “What do you mean?”

I guess I’m into torture. That’s the only logical reason for me asking her these kinds of questions.

“What part of the video did you like the best? What turned you on the most out of what you saw? What they did?”

“Oh.” More blushing. She glances around the room, as if checking to see if anyone’s paying attention to us, but they’re not. The place is bustling, with the low rumble of multiple conversations lingering in the air. I’m on fucking edge, waiting to hear her answer. “This is so embarrassing. I’m getting hot just thinking about it.”

Hot and wet is what I want to say, but I remain quiet.

She actually fans her face with her fingers, and it’s the fucking cutest thing.

“Come on, Birdy.” My voice drops. “Tell me.”

“When he went down on her.” The sentence comes out in a rush, the words strung together so they sound like one.

Whenhewentdownonher.

If her cheeks get any redder, I swear they’ll catch on fire.

“Did she come when he did that?”

“Sort of. I don’t know. It looked kind of fake. Really intense.” She shakes her head. “When I came, it wasn’t like that.”

Well damn. Now all I can think about is finding out what Wren’s O-face looks like. “Want me to be real with you right now?”

“Yes,” she whispers.

“I’m surprised you’re admitting all of this to me.”

“I am too.” She covers her face with her hands for a moment, shaking her head once. “I don’t know what’s wrong with me.”

“I like it.” She separates her fingers, so I can see her eyes peeking at me. “Keep talking.”

She laughs, dropping her hands into her lap. “I bet you like it.”

“Don’t worry. Your secret is safe with me.”

Her laughter dies. “I hope so. I-I’m probably stupid for admitting this, but I trust you, Crew. And I trust that you won’t tell anyone what I just shared with you.”

This is my little birdy’s problem—she trusts too easily. I show her a little bit of attention, and she’s confessing all of her dirty secrets. Why this girl decided to tell me she masturbated and got herself off last night, I don’t know.

But I’m thankful as fuck because now I know. I’m not about to let Larsen the asshole slip in and be the one who helps her explore her sexuality. Knowing how easy it was for me to gain her trust, I’m worried Larsen could have an even easier time of it. He’s known her longer. She seemed comfortable with him when I saw them talk at school.

I can’t let it happen. I need to distract her. Keep her from going to that dinner tonight.

The server shows up with the bill and I hand her my credit card. She takes care of it with her handheld machine, making idle conversation with me, but I’m too distracted. By the sight of Wren smiling at me shyly from across the table, mouthing the words thank you to me for paying for her lunch.

I’d buy her more than just a meal, though that had been exquisite torture. Watching her eat. Feeding her. The sounds she’d make, the low moans and murmured words full of appreciation.

It felt like fucking foreplay.

“Let’s get out of here,” I say once the server hands me my credit card and my receipt. I’m already rising to my feet, slipping on my coat and my beanie. I’m about to help Wren with hers, but she beats me to it, pulling her sleek coat on and grabbing her bag before she heads for the door.

I follow her outside, my phone in my hand as I tap away at the screen, sending Peter a quick message to come pick us up. He’s been with the family for a few years and he’s a loyal employee. Quiet.

Discreet.

Exactly what I need right now.

Peter pulls to the curb within minutes and I open the door for Wren, allowing her to crawl into the back seat before I follow her, slamming the door behind us.

“Where to?” Peter’s gaze meets mine in the rearview mirror.

“Drive around for an hour, would you?” I shoot Wren a quick look to find her already watching me, her brows lowered in confusion. “I don’t want the afternoon to end just yet.”

Her smile is slow. Beautiful. “I don’t either.”

“Will do,” Peter says with a nod, shifting the car into drive before he pulls back onto the street.

“Where are you taking me?” Wren asks, her voice soft.

I could come up with a long list of cheesy responses, every single one of them crude and sexual, but I don’t say any of that. This girl is sweet and kind and so fucking pure, it’s almost painful. I treated her like absolute garbage for so long. Chased after her only a few days ago, making her practically beg me not to do anything to her.

We’ve come a long way, my little birdy and me. I don’t want to spook her by coming on too strong. But fuck, I want every piece of her. Her lips. Her tits. Her pussy. Her ass. I want to own her body and soul, and when we’re finished, when I’ve fucked her over and over and made her come so hard, she nearly blacks out, I want her to look at me as if I’m a god. As if I’m her god and she’ll promise herself to me, not her father. I want to take that ring her father put on her finger and toss it. Make her forget all of her earlier promises.

More than anything, I want to own her.

“Where do you want to go?” I ask her, my gaze catching on her coat. How thick it is. Looks expensive.

What would she say if I laid it out on the back seat and then proceeded to go down on her? Give her a little bit of what she’s wanting from that porn she watched last night?

Peter probably wouldn’t look.

Yeah. No. I can’t do anything like that. Again, I don’t want to scare her. And he doesn’t deserve to see her naked. No one should see her like that.

Except for me.

“Wherever you want to go.” She rests her cheek against the soft black leather seat, smiling up at me with adoring eyes. All of her trust is shining in the green depths. I can’t help but see it and feel pain, because if I fuck this up—and I’m bound to, I’m not good at shit like this—I will hurt her beyond measure.

And that is the last thing I want to do.