Chapter 26- A life without love
“Life without love is like a book without words.”
-unknown
“We are all a little weird and life’s a little weird, and when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall in mutual weirdness and call it love.”
-Dr. Seuss
Why did I have to be called first? Of all the luck in Iron Forge...
I walked through the double doors and immediately was overwhelmed by everything. The dance floor was nearly vacant except for our five counterparts, all dressed as elegantly as we were.
Roundtables lined the outskirts of the room, dressed in ivory silk. The lighting of the room had been set at an attractive glow. At the front sat the whole reason we were here, two marble thrones-one black and one white.
Everyone stood for our entrance, all wore curious faces. The staff that lined the room were just as intrigued. Who would be their next rulers?
“Penelope.” George’s gentle voice called for my attention.
His wavy brown locks had been tamed and styled. A classic black suit hugged his frame perfectly, no surprises. He held up his hand for me to grab. Leading me towards the middle of the room where we waited for the rest to be called.
Siobhan was last. Her pale white legs peeked out through the slits of her dress asking to be seen. I rolled my eyes and looked away.
When I saw Tobias, I almost wished I had kept looking at her. He looked enchanting in a white tailored suit. His blue eyes met my own and all the memories of our time together flooded my mind. He turned away.
My heart clenched at the emotion flowing through his eyes but it wasn’t directed at me. He stared at Siobhan as if she was the answer to his prayers, maybe she was. With her, he’d fight to get back his family’s throne.
The acceptance of our situation was clear through his actions; an unnecessary touch of her waist, a too warm smile, a flirtatious wink. My heart could only take so much of the emotional abuse.
“Hey,” George whispered. “It’s okay. We’ll get through this together.”
I looked back up at my partner as saw genuine care. He knew Tobias and I were more than just an alliance and he wanted to help ease my pain. I smiled past the ache and nodded.
He held me at an appropriate distance as the waltz began. I tried not to show my shock at the sudden gracefulness he was portraying. Our last encounter on the dance floor had led to a bruised knee and two stubbed toes.
“You’ve improved,” I smiled.
His self-consciousness was adorable. “I wasn’t sure if you remembered me.”
“You’re memorable, George. Of course, I’d remember you.”
To be honest, I hadn’t given him much thought after that day but I didn’t lie. He was indeed memorable. He was the only one who managed to somehow poke my eye.
“I’ve been practicing,” he said, shrugging his shoulders.
“I can tell, no injuries this time.”
A slight flush crept up over his collar.
I chuckled. “I’ll stop. I promise.”
His return chuckle was rich and full of joy.
As we waltzed I kept my wandering eyes away from Tobias. I couldn’t handle another glimpse of him right now. George twirled me and I noticed his little girl watching from the arms of an attendant.
She wore the most adorable dress I’d ever see on a child, all fluff and gold. I moved out of George’s arms and walked over to the attendant.
“Hello, Phillip,” I smiled.
His face flushed with pride. “My, lady. So good to see you again. I am thrilled to see you in the top five.”
“Thank you, Phillip. I’m going to take little Kealie here to dance with me and her father.”
He nodded and set Kealie on the floor. She readily took a hold of my hand and pulled me towards the dance floor where George stood waiting, watching with an amused grin.
George reached for the little girl as soon as we were within distance. Kealie squealed delightedly in her father’s arms.
George placed his free hand on my waist and we continued at a slower pace. I was sure we were being watched but I didn’t care. I wanted to make Kealie happy right now.
“Hello, Kealie. My name is Penelope. It’s very nice to meet you.”
“Hi. I like your dress. Daddy says you are the beautifulest one here. I think he’s right,” she said happily.
I looked up at George and I swear I could see him squirming. I looked back at his daughter and smiled. “I think your daddy is pretty handsome himself.”
She giggled and nodded her head energetically.
I chuckled at her childish admiration. “So, Kealie. How old are you?”
“I’m four,” she said holding up three fingers.
“She’s four,” George confirmed.
“Hmm, do you think you can dance with him while I go say hello to my mommy and daddy?”
She nodded enthusiastically, her brown eyes shining.
“Thank you,” George said kindly.
“Don’t mention it.”
Other pairings had already sat down for dinner. The only ones to remain on the dance floor were Tobias and Siobhan. He held her tightly by her waist and she had both her arms draped around his neck.
Were they putting on a show for the council or was this real? Had they had something together and I hadn’t known about it? He wouldn’t do that, would he?
I turned away from their entangled bodies and found my parents. My mother looked beautiful in an elegant black evening dress but what really made her stand out was the smile she wore.
She hugged me fiercely. “My darling child, you look beautiful. You’re going to make a gorgeous queen, a strong queen.”
“Thank you, mama.”
My father pulled me from her embrace and wrapped his arms around me. “I told you could do it if you tried,” he chuckled.
I pushed back to look at him. “Papa, you look amazing. Mother should have gotten you to shave off your beard a long time ago.”
His smooth face made him appear ten years younger.
“Oh, Penny. Your mother loves the feel of it against her face. I will be growing it out again,” he laughed heartily.
“I’ve missed you all,” I said softly.
“We know, honey. We’ve missed you too. We prayed to Priestess Xandra daily.”
A foul taste entered my mouth. I needed to fill them in on some of the details of what was going on. I didn’t want them praying to a deity who didn’t deserve their devotion but now was not the time.
Soon.
“Have you seen Thomas?” I asked changing the subject.
“I did see him a little while ago. He’s around,” my father answered.
“Why don’t you two enjoy dinner and I’ll get with you a little later tonight, yes?”
They agreed and left to find their seats.
I scanned the crowd of unfamiliar faces searching for Thomas but he was nowhere to be seen. My stomach made an unsavory sound. I wished I could sit and eat but I couldn’t, not yet.
I smiled as George twirled Kealie around the dance floor. He smiled when he caught me watching but Kealie quickly asked for his full attention. I chuckled.
I ambled over to the black and white marble thrones. I’d be up there soon, this kingdom would be mine, the people would be mine, and the crown would be mine.
“They’re stunning, aren’t they?”
Those words. I knew those words. The little hairs on my arms stood at attention as the man moved closer.
He chuckled. “You should be very frightened of me, little sparrow.”
I turned to look at Thelonious. His graying hair was slicked back, away from his cold calculating eyes.
“Well, I’m not,” I said, flat out lying. I asked the question I’d been burning to know the answer to. “Why were you asking if I’d heard any private conversations recently?”
Surprise flitted across his face. Why was he surprised? Maybe by my boldness?
“I have eyes and ears everywhere, little sparrow.”
I mentally cringed at his use of the nickname.
He took a step towards me as I took one back. I stepped into a pair of arms I knew well.
Thomas.
“I’m sorry to interrupt but may I have this dance?” he asked, already dragging me away from Thelonious’ sneering face.
He spun me around before pulling me into his arms. “What was that about? I could feel the hate pouring out of the man.”
I sighed. “There is so much more going on than this game, Thomas. I wish there was more time to tell you. Maybe tomorrow, before you leave.”
“Sure, Pen, but now you have me worried.”
“Don’t. I’ll explain it all tomorrow. Right now, let’s just enjoy our time together.”
Dancing with Thomas was almost like muscle memory. He led and I followed. We easily fell into our usual pattern. His hand held my waist while the other held my hand firmly. We twirled around the room, at ease in our familiarity.
He smiled. “I feel like I was just showing you how to dance. Do you remember that day by the pond?”
I smiled fondly at the memory. “I do.”
“Things were simpler then. We had just turned sixteen and I already knew I wanted to marry you.”
I sucked in a sharp breath. “Thomas, don’t. Please.”
His hand tightened around my waist. “Why not?”
“Not here, please. Can we talk about this later?”
“I’ll be holding you to that, Pen.”
Was I ready to have this conversation with him?
I nodded. We danced in silence until a velvety voice interrupted us. A voice I knew well, Rowan.
“May I cut in?”
Thomas hesitantly agreed.
Rowan’s long arms pulled me close, disregarding all etiquette of proper distance between dance partners. Both his hands rested firmly on my waist and the intensity of his gaze demanded to be returned. I placed my hands on his shoulders.
“What do you want, Rowan?” I asked annoyed.
“I wanted to dance with you.” His starry eyes burned my skin with its gaze.
I softened at his response and allowed myself to be led across the dance floor. The silence between us seemed to grow with every second, threatening to overwhelm us.
“You know, if I could have kept you together, I would have. I only want you to be happy, Penelope. There was a lot of politics involved in the choice and Thelonious hasn’t been too happy with me since our run in. He did whatever he could to keep you two apart.”
“I don’t believe you,” I whispered. “Why didn’t you just say that in the first place?”
“Would you have believed me at that moment?”
I didn’t have to even think about it. “No, I wouldn’t have.”
“Which is why I didn’t say anything.”
“That’s the dumbest answer, you know that?”
“I do.”
We continued our waltz. I looked everywhere but at him. I cast my eyes upon Killian and Lisa, who were now sitting at the table designated for participants. How I yearned to sit down and enjoy my dinner.
Where was George? I scanned the room and he was still dancing with Kealie. He’d find me when he was ready. I turned my gaze back towards Killian and Lisa.
Lisa seemed like a sweet woman with a lovely character but Killian was obviously not falling for her charms.
His eyes were focused on the small blonde woman standing near one of the side entrances. Georgiana was being sly. She acted as if she wasn’t watching Killian watch her but she was just as aware of him as he was of her.
Rowan twirled me, bring my attention back to him.
His lower lip jutted out at my indifference towards him. I was tempted to pinch his bottom lip but I settled for a smile. “You’re adorable when things don’t go your way.”
His smile threatened to swallow up everything around him. His smile was the sun and I was flying too close.
“I knew you couldn’t stay mad at me,” he laughed.
“Of course, I can’t and besides, you didn’t do anything wrong. In fact, I owe you thanks for saving my life. I never got to thank you for pulling me out of that dream.”
His face darkened. “We still have to discuss what happened to you. Tobias told me his version of the events that led to that night but I’d like to hear your side.”
“Soon, I promise.”
He nodded, resigned. I wouldn’t be discussing any of that tonight.
Rowan’s hands gripped me roughly.
“May I interrupt?” George’s kind brown eyes crinkled.
“Of course,” I managed.
Rowan still hadn’t let me go.
George’s eyebrow lifted.
“Rowan, stop,” I said, swatting away his hands from my waist.
He slapped on a fake smile and released me. I said a quick goodbye and followed George to the participant table. We were all finally congregated at the table.
A second later, the staff began to bring out our dinner.
George’s brown eyes observed me, knowingly. “You sure have a lot of admirers. I can’t say I’m surprised though.”
I blushed. “It’s nothing.”
“Will you be able to continue with the game? I can tell you’re in love. I’m just not quite sure with who.”
My head snapped to him. “You don’t know what you’re talking about,” I seethed.
He held his hands up in surrender. “If you say so.”
I narrowed my eyes. “Where’s Kealie’s mother, George? Are you still in love with her?”
His face fell. My stomach knotted. I had a feeling I stuck my foot in my mouth.
“She died in childbirth. Do I still love her? Yeah, I’ll always love her but I have a big enough heart to love again. I don’t want to live a life without love,” he sighed.
“I didn’t want to have this conversation here,” he whispered, “but I might as well. I know I may not have been who you would have chosen but we’re in this together. If you’re willing to open your heart to me, I’m willing to do the same. I’d settle for friendship but I ask that you think about it.”
My body was flushed with heat by his honesty. It was rare to find someone so candid about who they were and how they felt. It was refreshing but could I eventually fall in love with him? Was I willing to open my heart to the burly man? Was I willing to fall in love with his child? I mentally shook my head. If we won and married, she’d be my child.
“I can’t give you an answer now, George. Do you mind if I think about it?”
He nodded, “take all the time that you need but like I said, friendship is all I ask for before anything.”
I nodded.
The rest of our night, thankfully, went off without a hitch. George stayed by my side. We mingled with the current council and local leaders of the nearby town. Headmistress Luna, from the orphanage, was sad to hear Tobias and I hadn’t been paired but hoped it wouldn’t affect the well-being of the Rose Suite Orphanage. I assured her it would not.
I spent the rest of the evening telling George about the orphanage and all the sweet kids there.
“If everyone will please gather round,” Killian said, gathering the attention of the room.
He held onto Lisa’s hand while everyone moved in closer to hear what he had to say. This didn’t feel good to me. What was the dummy going to do?
I’d kill him if he hurt Georgiana. He’d feel the wrath of my newly perfected groin kick.
Lisa’s soft features hummed excitedly.
“We’d like to denounce our claims to the throne,” Killian announced.
Wait, what? I knew the plan was to eventually find a way to lose so Tobias would win but this? Was it even possible?
The raucous chatter would not be shut down easily. I looked around the room to find Georgiana. She still stood by her post at the side entrance. Her eyes held unshed tears and her face held so much love.
“Quiet,” boomed Thelonious. “By orders of the mandate, it is unlawful for participants to forfeit their place in the game.”
If I could hate the man anymore I would.
Killian didn’t seem perturbed by the man’s words. Instead, he looked towards Rowan.
Rowan grinned smugly.
“The mandate was written by the Trinity and we know it well,” Willow and Ivy said, their voices in harmony.
Where had they come from? It was the first I’d seen them tonight. Both wore black sequined dresses with flowing trains behind them.
“One pairing may freely withdraw once pairings have been announced. It is at the discretion of the Trinity to allow or deny the request.” Rowan looked at Killian. “It is a request, is it not?”
Killian nodded eagerly.
Rowan, Willow, and Ivy spoke as one, “We will allow it.”
They turned their backs on Thelonious, not giving him an opportunity to say anything else.
Thelonious’ face turned a deep puce color.
Killian turned towards Georgiana. He got down on one knee and said, “I’d also like to ask, Georgiana Marie Lincoln, for her hand in marriage.”
Everyone held in their shock although it was evident on their faces, especially from Killian’s family.
Georgiana walked towards Killian in a daze of sorts. The tears fell freely down her cheeks.
I looked for Lisa in this situation, worried she’d be upset, but she was being kissed by a man in a light brown suit. Well, I’ll be...
“Georgie, I will try in every way to be worthy of your love. I will be honest with you, kind, patient and forgiving. I promise I will be a true and loyal friend, someone you can always count on. I will be your strength in times of adversity just as you will be mine. Will you give me the honor of being your husband?”
Georgiana now stood in front of Killian, who held onto her hand. She nodded, unable to say a word. Killian slipped a gorgeous sapphire ring onto her finger.
He jumped up and whooped for joy. He pulled Georgiana in for a very intimate kiss. I looked away, giving them their moment.
A few guffaws from the crowd but everyone seemed to be happy for their union.
George smiled happily down at me, truly happy for my friends.
“I’ll be back,” I’m going to congratulate them.”
“Take your time. I’ll be here.”
I rushed towards the happy couple. I engulfed Georgiana in my arms and squealed happily as the onlookers continued to talk. “I’m so happy for you, Georgiana,” I cried.
“Thank you, Penelope. You’ll be my maid of honor, of course,” she laughed.
“I’d be honored,” I chuckled.
I turned to hug Killian but ran smack dab into Tobias’ chest. His arms wrapped around me, holding me up against him. His blue eyes held my gaze for a second longer than necessary. My heart clenched at his touch. His nearness was too much. I yanked myself out of his hold and fought to hide the pain I was feeling.
Killian had chosen love over power. Why couldn’t he?
“Excuse me,” I said, stepping around him to get to Killian.
My congratulations to Killian was robotic at most. I needed to get out of here. The night was over anyway. I looked for George but he was holding a sleeping Kealie in his arms. He waved goodbye as he left to attend to Kealie.
Thomas stepped up and grabbed my hand. He pulled me out of the suffocating room and walked me yo my suite. He understood my need for silence as I battled to suffocate my emotions. I would not cry over Tobias.
I would not let him break my heart.