2513

My head is pounding, Miles Kohl thought as he took another gulp of coffee from his oversized mug.

Another day closer to the end of the year

Turning in his chair, Kohl took one more look at the mess that was his classroom. He snorted and shook his head at the sight of haphazard desks that had once been neat rows. He then noticed the papers tossed everywhere on the floor and the books that even though had a place on the student’s desks, always seemed to find their way to the floor. Typical, being the last class of the day, the students had raced for the door as if their lives depended on it.

Hell, if I didn’t have to finish these papers, I would have been at the front of the line.

He shook his head and then turned back to this computer. He looked at the minimized tabs at the bottom of the screen. Grade book. Google Chrome. Word. He clicked on the word icon. The word program opened up to a single page. He glanced in frustration at the words in italics at the top.

Harry Potter Can Fly.

He knew that there was a story in those four words. He had seen them on a drawing four weeks ago and had a moment of inspiration. He had opened the page and written down the title. Since then he had looked at the page every day, a story on his mind ready to go, but still had only managed to change the font a couple times and change it from regular to italics and underline it.

Four weeks? It can’t have been that-

“It sure was.” A voice broke him out of his thoughts. He looked up, confused; he was now sitting at a table in a dark restaurant. He immediately started looking around. He saw tables around him; it was sparsely packed with just a few other patrons in there.

He looked at the two gentlemen sitting at his table. One with piercing silver-blue eyes and sandy blonde hair dressed in a business suit; and the other with greenish brown eyes that hand streaks of gold and dark brown hair. Kohl noticed that the second one had the outfit of a Catholic priest on. They looked familiar. Too familiar and suddenly it dawned on him. He let out a throaty laugh.

“Really?” he managed to get out between chuckles. “Either I am being overworked, have finally gone nuts because of my students, or this is the most epic practical joke of all time.”

The one with the silver eyes managed a thin smile, “No joke Mr. Kohl.”

Miles Kohl shook his head in disbelief. “You are trying to convince me that you are one of the characters from a short story I wrote over five years ago.”

“Nick Stewart,” the silver-eyed one said with a slight nod, “at your service.”

Kohl turned to the dark haired one who had been quiet till now, “And that makes you Jake...”

“Mackenzie” the dark haired one finished.

Kohl let out a throaty laugh, “Stewart and Mackenzie. A grim reaper, excuse me, spiritual collections agent and a vampire.”

The two men looked at him with a combination of amusement and impatience as he continued to laugh. Kohl calmed down finally and shook his head. “No, way I say. I must be going nuts.”

Stewart shrugged his shoulders and with a wry smile said, “It doesn’t matter whether you are nuts or not. We are still here.”

For a minute Miles Kohl just took in the situation. Just a few moments ago he was in his classroom and now he was in a bar with two characters that he had invented for short stories over the last few years. The best he could figure, either he was dreaming, had gone nuts, or that wasn’t sweetener that he had put in his coffee after lunch.

He was leaning to the first one but was wondering about the last one.

“Epic” he muttered “Just ep-“

Before it had finished he heard the crashing sound of a chair and table being overturned. Kohl looked up to see Samuel L Jackson angrily walking toward them.

“WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY?!”

Kohl stared at him, confused. Stranger and stranger, he thought, definitely something in the coffee. He just stared at Jackson for a moment. Jackson did not look amused.

“Oh, “Jackson blurted out, “Did I break your concentration? I didn’t mean to do that. Please, continue. You were about to say something? ”

Kohl just looked for a moment, “Epic?”

Jackson did not look amused, in fact, he looked anything but amused, “What’s the matter? Oh, you were finished? Oh, well, allow me to retort.” Jackson looked at Kohl angrily and then burst into a tirade.

“DOES THIS LOOK LIKE SOME GREEK TRAGEDY!?”

“DO YOU SEE ODYSSEUS AND HIS GODDAMN BOAT AROUND HERE?”

“DO….YOU…. SEE…..ME…..WEARING SOME PUNK ASS TOGA!?”

Kohl just shook his head no.

Jackson narrowed his eyes and finished, “Then say “epic” again! Say! “Epic”! Again! I dare you! I double-dare you, motherfucker! Say “epic” one more goddamn time!”

Kohl swallowed hard, “amazing?”

Jackson nodded in sort of acceptance and began to head for the exit passing a girl pushing a cart of cupcakes. Kohl, Stewart, and Mackenzie just watched as he left. Confused, the three of them exchanged glances. Kohl winked at the other two and whispered, “just epic...”

Jackson stopped mid stride and gave Kohl a hateful glance, he grabbed a cupcake from the girl’s cart as she let out a scream. He hurled it at them as he shouted, “And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know my name is the Lord... “

The three started to move wildly to avoid the cupcake, diving under the table. Jackson finished off, “...when I lay my vengeance upon thee.”

Kohl was the first to look up, seeing that Jackson was gone pulled himself back into his chair. He was shortly followed by a visibly upset Stewart and shortly after that by Mackenzie, whose entire side of his head was covered with pink icing. Kohl made a chuckle that earned him an angry look from Mackenzie who had grabbed a napkin from the table trying to wipe it off.

“I could beat the crap out of you,” Mackenzie shot out, “”that was not even remotely funny!”

Kohl shot back, “Keep it up and I will make your life miserable in your next story.”

It was Mackenzie’s turn to chuckle, “I don’t think so. You have in the past five years written and rewritten just the introductory story about me. You have written about a second vampire in my story line, and a few excerpts here and there, so I think I am quite safe. Forget the immortality part in vampires; you are so lax at finishing our stories that you put them to shame…”

“Tell me about it,” a voice from the next table shot out. The trio looked over to see a nondescript man putting down his cup, “for nearly two years I have been waiting for my story to be finished. Hell Brainiac here hasn’t even given me a name.”

The nondescript man stood up to leave, “So there I am, in the middle of a space battle with asteroid belt pirates, my helmsmen dead, me leaping over to the control panel to fire back, and nothing.”

He put on a tattered jacket, “either kill me, make me a hero, at this point, I do not care. Just finish it for Pete’s sake.” He too then walked toward the exit.

Subdued, Kohl looked back at the other two. “Okay, for a moment. The briefest of moments I believe that this is really happening. What do you want?”

Nick Stewart looked at Miles Kohl, “Not us. My boss.”

Kohl’s eyebrow went up in confusion, “Death wants to talk to me.”

Stewart to a swig from a cup; he shook his head.

“Not him, Hades.”

“Hades?”

“In the flesh,” a voice called out. Kohl looked around to see himself once again in his classroom. However, this time, there was an older gentleman sitting at his desk and Kohl found himself in one of the desk’s occupied by his students. Hades was staring intently at the computer screen quickly scrolling down and reading.

“This won’t do,” Hades said looking at one of the files, he looked up at Kohl is a questioning look, “Susan Dayton was kneeling over the stone she had spent the better part of an hour carefully removing the dirt from. She rubbed the sweat from her forehead. Who knew you could sweat in Northern Scotland, she thought with a laugh. “

“Mr. Kohl,” Hades said, “I hope this is not an attempt at romance. Stick to sci-fi. It just will not do. Delete.”

Kohl started to say something but was cut off with a point of the finger by Hades as he opened another file. “Douglas paced around the office,” Hades read aloud, ” taking in the décor of his host. He noted the paintings and the personal pictures. As a psychiatrist, he felt that how the man surrounded himself was just as, if not more, important than what he said in a meeting. The décor is a window to the soul, he mused. Not one to make house calls, this was one he felt the need to take.”

Hades shook his head sadly, “I appreciate your desire to bore people to death, and it makes for steady business for me. But come on, even I felt my life draining out of me at that one. And you are outta here.”

Kohl just stared on with astonishment. What was the proper etiquette for defending years of work to Hades, he thought, can you tell him to go to hell?

“Well you can,” Hades replied reading his thoughts, “but when YOU get to the afterworld, I tend to hold grudges. Oh, this one is good.”

Hades nodded happily, “Some of these are good, and now I need you to do something.”

Kohl was not sure what to do at that point, so he just kept quiet. He took the moment to take a good look at Hades, he looked to be about six four or six five. His hair and his goatee were black with the spattering of white here and there to add a bit of maturity. He was dressed in a black suit without a tie.

“See, you have talent, but you are squandering it.” Hades stood up, “so your homework assignment is to finish a book. I do not care if you finish Mackenzie’s story, Talk about Stewart, or deal with any of the other characters running around in your head. But finish one!”

Hades walked by Kohl on his way to the door to the classroom, “As an added bonus, when I return, I will give you an exclusive interview with the God of the Underworld. Moi.”

Kohl looked over to Hades as he stopped at the door, “Let me ask you a question.”

Hades gave a half smile, “Shoot.”

“Why? What?” Kohl sputtered out.

“All in due time,” Hades smiled, “but I will give you this teaser…”

“2513.”