The Wall of Winnipeg and Me: A Novel

“I can’t believe it.”

“Believe it,” I snarled as I tried to shake off my anger for about the millionth time in the last day.

Diana scoffed as she moved around me, a stained plastic bowl in one hand, a brush in the other. Her brown eyes temporarily shifted from the section of my head she’d already put color on, to meet my gaze before she blew a raspberry. “You know I don’t want to talk about your family, but when I think they can’t get any shittier, they do.” Liar. She didn’t mind going over the finer defects of four-sixths of my family. How many times had we sat in her room and acted out the hundreds of things we’d do and say to my sisters in retaliation for whatever they’d put me through? A hundred? Not that we’d ever gone through with any of it. They were older than us, and you didn’t mess with crazy.

“The worst part was after Ricky grabbed my arm, no one said anything. They all wanted to act like nothing had happened.”

“Jesus, V,” my best friend muttered. “I told you not to go.”

She had, and I’d been stubborn and didn’t listen. “I know.”

Her hand touched my shoulder. “I’m sorry.”

Not as sorry as I was.

I made it three hours at my mom’s before everything went to hell. Three hours before I stormed out of her house, pissed out of my mind. I was honestly surprised that I had managed to spend the night at my hotel before heading to the airport first thing in the morning to catch a flight back to Dallas on standby. The anger hadn’t abated as much as I’d hoped on a good night’s sleep, and the flight back hadn’t helped much either.

As soon as I landed, I’d texted one of the only people in the world who was loyal to me, and then headed over to Diana’s so I could tell her everything and get it off my chest. Did it help? Not much, but it was something. So I told her everything that had happened as she dyed my hair some surprise color I told her she could choose. It was one of the benefits of being your own boss.

“Wait, so you didn’t tell me what happened with Aiden,” she finally noted.

Good grief. There I went getting pissed off all over again. At least that was one issue I’d managed to set aside for a while since the day before, but all of a sudden it was another fresh wound to add to my already existing one. “He called and cancelled on me at the last minute.”

She winced. Her “ooh” just barely audible.

“Yeah,” I mumbled as her boob passed about an inch from my face. “His old coach was coming into town or something, and he was busy watching game film or something with the team when he called, but it doesn’t matter. It was a stupid idea to invite him anyway.”

“I’m sure he had a good reason to cancel,” Di tried to assure me.

There was only one reason, and it was the most important one to him. I didn’t need the details to know what the exact wording would be. “Yeah. I’m sure he did.” I let out a shaky breath. “I’m just in a shitty mood. Sorry.”

“No, I can’t believe it,” the smart-ass gasped.

I reached forward and tried to pinch her through the apron she’d put on, but she danced out of the way with a big grin on her face. “Leave me alone.”

She stuck her tongue out. “Put your potato head down for a second, would you?”

I mocked her as I did what she asked. Diana took a step toward me, her belly inches away. She must have reached forward because her shirt went up an inch, exposing a sliver of skin.

I frowned.

Reaching from under the hem of the cape she’d put on me, I pulled her shirt up even higher, exposing a row of small bruises shaped like a smaller version of the ones on my forearm.

“What are you doing?” She took a step away.

I looked up at her, at her face, her neck, her arms, and saw nothing that shouldn’t have been there.

“What?” Her tone was a lot less harsh the second time, but I knew, I knew from the way she rubbed her pant leg that something was going on. That was her nervous tic.

One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten.

I had to count to ten again before I could manage to not lose it. “What happened?” I asked her as coolly and calmly as possible even though I was already on my way to becoming even angrier than I’d been when I first showed up.

Diana tried to brush it off a little too quickly. “Nothing. Why?” She had the nerve to look down and pull up her shirt in the same way I had. She even frowned as she touched the bruises I’d bet my first born she knew damn well about.

“Where did those come from?”

She didn’t look up as she answered. “I remember hitting my hip.”

“You hit your hip?” She was lying. She was damn well lying out of her ass.

“On the counter.”

“On the counter?” I asked slowly. This felt like a terrible dream.

My best friend—my best friend of my entire life—lied again. “Yeah,” she insisted.

“Di—” I wasn’t going to lose it. I wasn’t going to lose it front of her.

“Let me finish putting this on your hair,” she cut me off.

“Diana—”

“Tip your head down one more time, Vanny.”

“Di.” I grabbed the hand she had extended toward me. Her brown eyes shot to mine, her expression startled. “Did Jeremy do that?”

“No!”

A knot formed in my throat, growing bigger and bigger by the second. “Diana Fernanda Casillas.” Yeah, I went with her whole name. My hand shook. “Did Jeremy do that?”

This fucking liar supreme met my gaze evenly, and if it weren’t for her palm hitting her pant leg again, I would have believed she was telling me the truth, that this person I loved, who I would do anything for, and who I felt would do anything for me, wouldn’t lie to me.

I wasn’t even about to focus on the fact that I’d kept things to myself in the past. That I hadn’t told her I’d married Aiden. That she didn’t know about my student debts. None of that configured into my thoughts in that instant.

“No, Van. He loves me. I hit my hip.”

That knot in my throat swelled and I could feel my eyes well up as her gaze met mine unflinchingly. That was the problem. Diana was just like me. Once she was in too deep, she wasn’t about to dig herself out of the hole she was in. She wasn’t about to back down and tell me the truth.

“I’m fine, Van. I swear.”

She swore. The tingling in my nose got worse. “Di,” I kind of croaked out.

The smile that took over her mouth hurt me. “I hit my hip, stupid. I promise.”

I didn’t think Diana would ever know how bad she was hurting me. I’d like to think the lies I’d told her had been to protect her, so she wouldn’t worry about me being in disastrous debt, and I hadn’t told her Aiden and I eloped because she had a big mouth and she’d tell everyone. I knew she’d grudgingly understand that after she was done being mad for not being the first person I told. She didn’t know how to keep a secret; we all knew it.

But this…

I didn’t have it in me to keep my mouth shut even though I knew there was no way in hell she was going to backtrack and admit the truth. Tightening my hold on her, I tried to ignore the severe beating of my heart and made sure her eyes met mine. “Di—”

She was lying. She was being a massive liar as she said, “It’s just a bruise, Van.”

But it wasn’t.

It wasn’t.

It was the conservative sedan parked in the driveway when I got home that told me we had a visitor. Leslie.

Oh Leslie.

The one person in the world who I actually liked, but every once in a while, specifically this weekend and every June 15^th, made me just a teensy bit jealous. Leslie was the only person in the world who I could honestly say Aiden cared about, and I guess I was just a greedy, selfish asshole. I couldn’t even get a ‘happy birthday’ on my special day, while Aiden didn’t just remember Leslie’s birthday, but he cared enough to get me to send him a present.

Was I seriously complaining about Aiden caring about someone who wasn’t me?

I was in a bad mood—a worse mood than I’d been in when I’d first gotten back to Dallas five hours ago. Hell, I’d been in a bad mood since I left for El Paso. All I wanted to do was get home, stew in my anger, and maybe watch a movie to get my mind off all the things that were bothering me. My mom, Susie, her husband Ricky, Diana, her boyfriend, and Aiden. I wanted to be alone.

Parking on the street, I grabbed my suitcase from the backseat, ignoring the pain radiating from my wrist, and trudged up the driveway, then the path.

I counted to ten over and over again as I unlocked the door and slipped inside as quietly as possible.

“Vanessa?”

I was halfway up the stairs with my suitcase gripped in hand when Aiden’s voice reached me from the foot of them. Slowly lowering my bag to the step I was on, I ground down on my molars and glanced over my shoulder at the man who had stood me up, standing there in between the living room and the foyer in his sweat pants and a tank so loose I could see the ripped sides of some of the sexiest muscles in the universe.

Did I love sexy lateral muscles? Of course. I had ovaries.

But I also had a brain, a heart, and some pride, and huge, brawny arms on someone who left me hanging weren’t going to make me forget a single thing.

Things might have gone worse if he’d been there, I tried to remind myself as I tugged at the sleeve of the hoodie I’d put on before leaving Diana’s, drawing it further down my arm. But the other half of my brain wanted to believe that maybe the weekend would have gone differently if Aiden had been there.

Then again, maybe I just wanted to blame someone other than myself for not listening to my instincts when they told me to do something, and then I did otherwise.

“Yes?” I asked, sensing my cheeks go tight.

The big guy was examining me, something about the way he was pursing his lips said he was hesitating. “Leslie’s here.”

The words were barely out of his mouth when a white head of hair peeked out from the living room. Nearly as tall as Aiden and way more fit than any man who should have been considered elderly could be, Leslie Prescott flashed those perfect white veneers at me. “Hello, Vanessa.”

A sharp pain thudded right between my eyebrows unexpectedly. I set my suitcase down in place and smiled at the man I’d met in the past. We’d spent months together in Colorado on two separate occasions, and he’d visited Aiden the rest of the times. I liked him; I really did like him, but I was in a shitty mood, and it wasn’t fair to take it out on him.

“Hi, Leslie,” I pretty much muttered as I jogged down the steps and held out my hand.

He shook it, flashing me an open, easy smile. “Congratulations,” he said, shaking my hand. “I heard the big news.” Leslie’s other hand came forth to clasp mine between both of his, his smile growing bigger by the second. If he thought it was strange that I didn’t give Aiden a hug or a kiss when I got home, it wasn’t evident on his features. “I’m a bit hurt I wasn’t invited, but I understand.”

“Oh, thanks.” I gave him a tired smile, pointedly ignoring the big body standing in my peripheral vision, watching on.

“I couldn’t be happier for you two. I was disappointed you were out of town this weekend, but I’m sure we’ll have more time to see each other in the future. ”

I forced myself to keep my smile on my face. Aiden and I had nearly five years left together, I was positive I’d see Leslie again at some point. “I’m sure we will.”

Leslie beamed. “We finished watching some footage, so I’ll get out of your hair to give you both some alone time tonight, eh?”

The tender, amused look that came over Aiden’s face more than slightly irritated me. “Eh.” Aye.

Then the fact that his Canadian had snuck up on him—when it only came up in the times he was really comfortable—made my little-girl immaturity that much worse.

“I’ll let you two to it. I have some work I need to catch up on.” I focused on Leslie as I talked.

The older man nodded. “Sure, sure. I understand. If you’ll excuse me, I need to make a pit stop before I go.” He smiled again, easing the tension in me just slightly.

He hadn’t done anything wrong, and I was being an asshole. “You’ll be by tomorrow?”

“Eh. My flight leaves the day after. I have to get back home.”

“I’ll see you tomorrow then. Drive safe.”

Leslie agreed and then made his way toward the half bath around the corner. That was my cue to get the heck out of there. Grabbing my bag with my good hand, I managed to make it halfway up the staircase before I heard, “You all right?”

I didn’t bother stopping. I kept going up. “I’m fine.”

“Vanessa.” His voice was low, careful. “Look at me.”

One hundred and eighty percent ready to be in my room, I stopped and turned around, raising my eyebrows at the figure standing at the bottom of the staircase with one palm on the handrail.

He had that dark gaze narrowed on me. “When you say you’re fine, I know you’re not.”

“Hmm,” was the only thing I could manage to get out without saying something really bitchy. I tried to tell myself it wasn’t a big deal he hadn’t gone with me; I’d told myself that at least a dozen times over the weekend. I also told myself I understood that he’d stayed to see someone he cared about, but it didn’t help, and it didn’t work.

My damn pride couldn’t handle being stood up and let down by not just him but by everyone this weekend.

“That’s what I thought,” Aiden stated as he tipped his chin up at me almost defiantly.

I squeezed my fingers around the handrail, envisioning it was his neck I was wringing. “Yeah, I guess so,” I admitted with a sniff. “I don’t want to talk about it. I’m going to bed.”

I barely managed to turn around when Aiden’s raspy low voice spoke up. “I don’t care if you don’t want to talk about it. I want to talk about it,” he said in that authoritative, demanding voice that scratched at my nerves. It wasn’t a loud voice by any measure, but it didn’t need to be.

Rolling my eyes, I shook my head as he continued his bullshit explanation, “Leslie called, said he was in San Antonio and asked if he could drop by for a few days. Coach wanted to go through some more footage before I left, and I lost track of time.” And he kept going. “I figured you of all people would understand. I don’t get what the big deal is.”

For one moment, I thought about picking up my suitcase and throwing it at him. Immature, sure. Unnecessary, yes. But it would have made me feel better. Instead, I counted to seven, and while looking at the stairs, I said to him, “I do understand, Aiden. I get it. Your job is the most important thing in your life and I’m fully aware of how much Leslie means to you. I know that, and I’ve always known that.”

“Yet you’re still mad.”

There wasn’t a point in even lying, was there? Setting my luggage on the stair ahead of me, I turned back around to face that dark head of hair and tanned face I’d seen more of when I worked for him than I did now that I lived with him. “I’m not mad, Aiden. I’m just… look, I’m in a terrible mood. Maybe now isn’t the time to talk, all right?”

“No.” His back straightened and he took his hand off the handrail. “I stayed to watch footage with the staff and see Les,” he stated, a furrow between his eyebrows.

“I understand why you stayed. I’m not telling you I don’t. I’m frustrated over this entire fucking useless weekend, and I don’t want to take it out on you.” That was a lie. I sort of did. “Can we please stop talking about this?”

I knew what his reply was going to be before it came out of his mouth: nope. He didn’t fail me. “I didn’t do anything for you to be mad over.”

Heaven help me. Heaven fucking help me. My fingers went up to press over the top of my eyebrows, as if that would keep my headache at bay. I hissed, “Aiden, just let it go.”

The man never let anything go? Why would this moment be any different? “No. I want to talk about it. I didn’t go with you to your mom’s house. I’ll go next time.”

The problem with some people was that they didn’t understand the principle of things. The other thing with people was that some guys didn’t understand when to let shit go, so they kept pushing and pushing and pushing until you just said “fuck it.” That was exactly what Aiden did to me then. The pain in my head got even worse. “I invited you so you could meet my mom and my foster parents. And stupid me, I got disappointed when you bailed on me at the last freaking moment.”

In hindsight, that sounded a lot more melodramatic than it needed to.

The fact that my mom had knowingly lied to me had been bad enough. Susie going into psycho mode had definitely made things worse. Diana’s lies only magnified every ruthless, hurt emotion in me, but I didn’t tell him any of that. Every piece of anger in me had been sprouted from the seeds Aiden’s absence had left.

“I had to,” he stated in that cool, crisp tone that said he definitely didn’t understand what I was so upset about it.

Sighing, I pulled my hand away from my face and shook it off. “Forget it, Aiden.”

“I don’t understand why you’re so pissed off,” he snapped.

“Because! I thought we were getting to be friends, and you couldn’t even bother to remember to tell me until the last minute you weren’t going with me. Do you have any idea how unimportant that makes me feel?” I snapped back.

Some strange emotion flickered in his dark eyes, the long length of his face loosening for a second before the normal, bland expression took over his face. “I stayed for a good reason.”

“I get it. I know your priorities. I know where we stand. I know what this is and what it isn’t. I’ll try to adjust my expectations from now on,” I cut him off, completely over this stupid conversation.

Aiden’s dark pink mouth had been open, but at my comment, he slammed it closed. His forehead creased, and that pouty mouth that belonged on a woman with some kind of cosmetic enhancement, went tight at the corners. He blinked those long brown eyelashes as his forehead scrunched.

He was at a loss of words.

Words that could have gone along the lines of “We are friends” or “I’m sorry.” Instead, I got nothing. No excuse, no promise, nada.

So frustrated—so freaking frustrated—I held back the eye roll tempting me by the second and plastered a tight, completely fake smile on my face. “I’m really tired.” And my arm hurt. “Good night.”

Two steps up the staircase later, I heard, “It isn’t that big of a deal.”

Why? Why me? Why couldn’t he just drop this before I decided to slit his throat in his sleep? “Forget I even said anything,” I tossed over my shoulder for his sake and mine. God, I was being bitchy, but I couldn’t find it in me to care too much.

Aiden snickered loudly. “I don’t understand why you think it’s such a big deal. I’m not asking you to pay me back for the airline ticket or the rental car. I’m sure I can meet your family another day. It isn’t like we don’t have time. We’ve got five years, Vanessa. I don’t want to spend them with you being pissed at me the entire time. You knew what you were getting yourself into.”

“Trust me, I haven’t forgotten for a second how long we’re in this for.” I pulled my suitcase up another step angrily.

When I didn’t say anything else, he took it upon himself to continue. “What the hell is your problem?”

I turned completely around to face him, my hands going instinctively to my hips. “I already told you what my problem is. I’m in a shit mood and you left me hanging, and that bothers me way more than it should, I know that. But I know I should have known better.”

He scoffed. He scoffed so hard his nostrils flared and he shook his head, his eyes going everywhere except at me. “What the hell is that supposed to mean?”

I felt my blood rush away from my face, but I’d be damned if I walked back up to my room now. Sometimes facial features said so much more than words could, and I hoped the smart-ass smile I was giving him said exactly what I wanted it to say. Fuck you.

A sharp noise that could have been mistaken for a bitter laugh exploded out of Aiden’s mouth. “I’m not paying off your loans and buying you a house to have to put up with this, Van. If I wanted someone to nag at me, I would have gotten a real wife.”

Oh… hell… no.

Every drop of blood in my upper body went south. Ugly, hurtful words pinched my throat and I couldn’t talk. I couldn’t think. I couldn’t even breathe.

I didn’t have to take this shit.

Standing there on the step, I nodded, my hands shaking. “You know what? You’re right. You’re completely right. I’m sorry I opened my fucking mouth. I’m sorry I gave a shit and started looking forward to you coming along with me.” And I was sorry I was blaming him for starting off a chain of events that spiraled downhill.

I really was being a wee bit of an asshole, but I couldn’t muster up enough fucks to give in that moment to let the situation go.

Clenching my hands together, I jogged up the steps with my suitcase in my bad hand and slammed the door shut behind me once I was in the room. I wasn’t sure how long I stood there, staring around me at what suddenly felt like a five-year prison. If we weren’t already “married,” I’d pack my stuff up and leave.

But I’d signed the papers and made a promise to him. Five years. I won’t go anywhere until you’re a resident, I promise.

That was the difference between Aiden and me though.

I actually kept my word.

Dropping my bag on the floor, I scrubbed at my cheeks with my hands, trying to calm down. My eyes felt oddly dry. This hole the size of Crater Lake took residence where the important parts of my soul used to be. I wasn’t going to cry. I wasn’t going to fucking cry.

I bent down to unzip my suitcase and took all the clothing out to wash later when The Wall of Asswipe wasn’t hanging around. That knot in my throat I’d gotten back at Diana’s seemed to swell back to its original size. I wasn’t going to cry. I wasn’t going to cry even if the urge to was more overwhelming than it had ever been.

I was in the middle of sliding my suitcase beneath the bed a little more forcefully than was necessary when a knock rapped at my door, two taps too low to be Aiden.

Controlling the anger and the not-tears creeping around in my eyeballs, I called out, “Yes?”

“Van.” It was Zac.

“Yes?”

“Can I come in?”

Taking off my glasses, I rubbed at my eyebrow bone for a moment with the meaty part of my palm and let out a shuddering breath. “Of course. Come in.”

Sure enough, Zac opened the door and slid inside my room, a funny, wary smile on his face as he closed it behind him. “Hi, darlin’,” he said in an almost delicate voice.

I gave him an equally wary smile, trying to suppress my aggravation with the guy downstairs, with my family back in El Paso, and the idiot known as my best friend in Forth Worth. I played with the sleeve of my hoodie again to make sure it was down to my wrist. “Hey.”

“I like your hair.”

“Thanks.” I probably would have liked the teal color a lot more than I did, in any other circumstance, but I was so pissed and disheartened, I couldn’t find it in me to care my hair was now like something straight out of Candyland.

“You all right?” he asked, moving to take a seat on the edge of my bed just a couple feet away from where I was kneeling.

Reluctantly, I kicked my luggage the rest of the way under the bed frame and got to my feet. “Yeah.”

“You sure?”

Shit. “You heard all that, huh?”

“I heard,” he confirmed with a blink of those wonderful blue eyes.

Of course he had. I’d been pretty much yelling toward the end. “He gets on my nerves so easily sometimes, I don’t understand.” I took a seat right next to him with a sigh.

“I know.”

“He doesn’t care about anyone but himself.”

“I know.”

“Then he gets mad when someone is disappointed in him,” I grumbled at the floor.

“I know,” Zac agreed again.

“I didn’t beg him to go with me. I just mentioned it. I would have been fine if he’d said he was too busy.”

“I know.”

“Why is he such a pain in the ass?”

In my peripheral vision, Zac held out his hands. “The world will never know, darlin’.”

I snorted and shifted my gaze over to him finally. “No, probably not.” I nudged his elbow. “You wouldn’t have backed out on me, would you?”

“No way.” He nudged me back with his thigh, drawing my attention down to the reindeer print pajamas he had on. “Bad trip home?”

I hadn’t told him much about my family situation in the time we’d known each other. Besides a few casual mentions of how I wasn’t close to my mom, how much of a pain in the ass my sisters were, and possibly bringing up my foster parents in passing once or twice, I’d never gone into too much detail with Zac. But he knew enough.

Drawing my gaze up, it settled on the stubble he’d let himself grow out over the course of some time; he usually shaved that baby face every day. Light blue circles were nestled under his eyes and his cheeks looked hollower than they had two weeks ago, making me feel like a self-centered asshole. Some people had real things to worry about, and here I was losing it over people who didn’t care about me.

“Yes.” That was an understatement. I shook my head, bottling up the argument with Susie and her husband for the time being. “It sucked. A lot.”

Zac fed me a pity smile that I ate up. “Why do you think I haven’t gone back home?”

Ahh, hell. “I hear ya.” Tilting my head to look at him, I took him in. “I’ve been worried about you, you know.”

He made a dismissive noise in his throat. “I’ll be fine.”

How many times had I not said those exact same words to myself when it felt like the world was falling apart on me? Reaching over, I put my hand on his thigh. “Of course you’re going to be, but that doesn’t mean I’m not going to worry or wonder what you’re going to do.”

That sandy head dropped back and his sigh seemed to fill my room. “I don’t fucking know, Vanny,” he admitted to me in a tired voice. “I have no idea what I’m going to do.”

Maybe I couldn’t fix the situations with Aiden, my sister, and Diana, but I could try to help Zac as much as possible now that he finally wanted to talk about it. “Do you still want to play?”

He chuffed. “Of course.”

That was easy enough. “Then you know what you’re going to do. You’re going to start training again, and you’re going to get your agent to find you another team to join. Maybe not this season, but at least next. No if, ands, or buts about it. Don’t give yourself another option,” I told him. “What about that?”

Zac’s sock-covered toes tapped against the floor and the sound of his steady puffing told me he was there. His hand came to rest over mine and I elongated my fingers upward to link through his.

“Maybe things won’t work out, but maybe they will. You’ll never know unless you try, and if you don’t try, you’ll probably end up an old geezer wondering what would have happened if you hadn’t given up,” I warned him before letting go of his hand and reaching around to give him a one-armed hug.

That had him snickering.

“You’re okay on money?” I wasn’t rich by some standards, but I had my savings still, and I was proud of how much I’d set aside all on my own.

“I’m okay,” he assured me.

I figured he was. He wasn’t extravagant. “If you decide to stay, I’ll even let you run this marathon in February with me if you’re a good boy,” I added, pulling him into my side for another side hug.

His back stiffened. “You’re going to run a marathon?”

“Why do you think I’ve been running?”

“Because you’re bored?”

I’d done more research on the training process that was suggested for people running their first marathon, and I couldn’t see anyone doing it because they were bored. “No. I just want to do it. I haven’t had time to train for one before, and I like the idea of it being a challenge.” Plus, I wanted to prove something to myself. Do something for my poor knee. I wanted to remind it that it could do whatever it wanted to. That it wasn’t anyone’s bitch.

I wanted to know that nothing was impossible and give my sister a big fuck you for what she had done to me.

I leaned into his side and let out a shaky breath, suddenly feeling overwhelmed over the entire weekend. “Are you in or what?”

The long Texan let out a deep sigh.

“What? You’re going to be a loser and back out?”

His face angled slightly toward me. The corner of his mouth hooking up. “What do I get out of it?”

“The same thing I do—personal satisfaction that you did something you couldn’t do before.”

The smile that came across Zac’s face wiped out any lingering resentment I had right then over Aiden’s behavior, at least. Those blue eyes twinkled and he radiated something awesome. “You are just a ray of sunshine, aren’t you, darlin’? Do something you couldn’t do before. Well, fuck it. Count me in to this trial of terror.”

Yeah, I might have squealed, surprised he’d actually taken up my offer. “Really?”

“Yes, really.” Just like that, his smile drooped a little. “How many miles is a marathon again?”

I winced, not wanting to kill our agreement before it even got started. “You don’t want to know, Zac.” Sliding my arm off, I gave the middle of his back a solid pat. “You don’t want to know.”

“Fuck me, huh?”

“Basically.”

He grinned and I grinned right back at him.

“Are you going to be okay?”

I nodded. “I’m always going to be okay.”

An hour or two later, I was lying in bed with one of my favorite movies on, the volume on ultra-low—I had the captions on—when three soft knocks tapped on my door.

Three. It was Aiden.

After a moment, three more low, low, low knocks hit the door.

I kept my mouth shut and went right on watching Independence Day.

He could take his real wife and shove her up his ass.