Chapter 46: Revelations
I let out a sigh of relief when he's finally gone, turning back to my room and sprinting over to my pants that still sit neatly on my dresser. The note remains deep in the pocket, and I quickly glance over my shoulder to ensure that Heloix has not secretly returned before pulling it out.
My name is written out on the front, and I run my finger along the script before tearing it open, the paper unfolding several times to reveal a short sentence inside. I stare at it curiously, eyes squinting as I try to make out what the words mean.
I assume by the handwriting that a Beast has written it, the font smooth and easy to read. Humans tend to have a mixture of chicken scratch and poor grammar.
Flipping it over, I double-check that nothing has been written on the other side before turning it back to face me.
The human you shop with knows the truth.
It's clear that the human it refers to is John, but the truth part has me stumped. He's not exactly one to keep secrets, the mere thought giving him what the humans call anxiety bowels.
I can feel my blood pressure spike as I start to worry about all the things that it could be, and my hands shake as I fold back up the note and stick it securely in my pocket. This is likely just some mean prank that a guard is pulling on me, but a small part of me fears that it speaks the truth and there's something I don't know.
With the note safely put away, I hurry out of my wing towards the servant's chambers, hoping to catch John before he leaves for the morning. He's always milling about nowadays, taking advantage of the security our friendship offers him.
The corridors are relatively empty as I move through them, the only bodies present being the guards standing along the wall. As I round the corner that will lead me to the stairwell, I gasp and jump back behind the wall, having spotted Heloix leaving his office.
Bringing my hand up to my chest, I push against the muscle as I force myself to take a deep breath and calm down. He didn't seem to notice me, but I know that he definitely heard me, and my odd reaction has no doubt made him suspicious.
"Adeline?" He questions, popping his head around the corner and glancing down at me with a smirk. "Care to share why you are hiding from me?"
I feign innocence as I step away from the wall, plastering a big grin on my face.
"I wasn't!"
Heloix snorts, stepping towards me and crowding me back against the wall. I crane my neck to look at him, my face heating up under his gaze.
His hand moves towards my face, fingers grabbing onto a strand of my hair and tucking it behind my ear.
"I won't force you to tell me, but I'd like to know." He murmurs.
Leaning into his touch, I shut my eyes as I wrack my brain for a believable excuse, popping them open as one comes to mind.
"I was going to get John and have him help me carry our new furniture to the servant's chambers." I say, the lie rolling smoothly off my tongue.
Heloix squints, but doesn't push the subject.
"I'll walk with you." He murmurs, turning on his heel and walking down the hallway he just came from.
I hold back a relieved sigh as I begin to follow him, a small smile spreading on my face as he reaches down and grabs my hand with his. Heloix strolls towards the servant's quarters, his feet moving so sluggish that I end up being the one to lead us.
It's like he can sense my eagerness to find John and is purposely dragging our walk out. As the thought flashes in my mind, I turn to glance at Heloix, letting out a chuckle as I notice his blackened eyes.
That's exactly what he's doing.
Despite Heloix's assurances that he is not jealous of John and has no concerns with me hanging out with him, I can tell that it's not entirely true.
My palms begin to sweat as we approach my destination, and I cringe in embarrassment at the knowledge that Heloix can feel it. I expect him to release my hands and potentially even wipe the sweat off on his pants, but he politely ignores the moisture, pretending as if he doesn't even notice it.
The servants move out of the way as we meander down the hall, and I can't help but feel accomplished by their lack of surprise. It's nice to finally be able to move about without receiving glares or shocked faces.
I turn to face Heloix and stop his walking when we reach the entrance to the servant's corridor, my free hand moving to his waist.
"This is the only space they have to get away from Beasts." I murmur, bringing up his hand to my lips and pressing a quick kiss on it.
Heloix frowns, but nods in understanding and releases my hand, his body stiff as he backs away from me.
He bends down until he is only inches from my face, his minty breath on my skin. "I don't know why you are so anxious, and I don't know why you won't share it with me, but I'll be in my office all day if you want to come up and talk."
I gulp, nodding.
Heloix presses a small kiss to my cheek before turning and walking away, his tall frame looking silly amongst all the humans. My face heats up as I realize this must be how I look when standing next to him, my head barely reaching his chest.
His body disappears around a corner, and I turn to head into the servant's quarters, eyes scanning around the room for John. Almost immediately, I spot him walking towards me, his face blank and eyes glazed over as he moves.
Raising my hand, I shake it about to capture his attention, watching as he blinks a couple of times in confusion before grinning at me.
"Sorry, just woke up." He explains as he approaches.
I offer him a tight smile, gesturing to the hallway that leads into the main castle. "Come with me outside. I want to run something by you."
John's head tilts to the side as I speak, his eyes narrowing slightly before he nods in agreement.
"Okay?" He answers, suspicion clear in his voice.
Together we speed walk through the castle, moving in silence towards the back door that leads to the gardens. My hands once more begin to sweat as I push open the exit, mind racing over the possibilities of what John might say to me.
I walk us to a private part of the gardens, between some large shrubs that manage to hide us pretty well, and quickly glance around to ensure that nobody is in hearing distance.
"I found a note stuffed into the new furniture last night." I whisper, reaching into my pocket and pulling out the paper.
I glance at it quickly before passing it over to John, watching as he tentatively takes the note and unwraps it, eyes widening as he reads what's written inside.
He gulps as his eyes scan over the words, his reaction revealing to me that there is indeed something he's keeping from me.
"Who gave this to you?" He asks.
I shake my head, refusing to answer.
"What aren't you telling me?"
John looks at me confused, his eyebrows pulled together and shoulders shrugging in response to my question. Despite what he displays with his face and posture, I notice his ears and chest redden, a telltale sign that he is lying to me.
"Tell me." I urge.
John shrugs once more. "I really don't know what you're talking about. You should show this to Heloix."
Frowning, I shake my head.
"No, because unlike you Heloix is a good liar."
John stammers as he insists that he doesn't know anything, and in pure frustration, I reach up and grab his hair, grabbing a fistful of it before he has the opportunity to run from me.
He whines in response, body hunched forward as his hands come up to grip mine, reminding me of the position he was in when Heloix did the same thing to him. My eyes widen as I realize just how much he is rubbing off on me, and I make a mental note to work on being a better person after getting my answers from John.
"Tell me or I'll rip your precious hair out." I threaten, hoping that he doesn't call me on my bluff.
John grips onto my hand and tries to pry my hand away, and I squeeze harder in response.
"What the fuck, Addie? Let go of my hair!"
"Tell me."
"After you let go of me." John cries out, and I hesitate for a moment before letting go.
He stumbles away from me in shock, his eyes wide as he rubs at his sensitive scalp. A part of me feels bad for my actions, embarrassed at how violent they are, but another part of me is ready to do it again if he doesn't give me the information I want.
"Heloix made me promise not to say anything." John starts, face reddening as his eyes dart around to make sure nobody is paying attention to us. "And it was supposed to stay a secret, but one of the humans must have walked in on the Guard and spread the word."
My face falls.
"What word?" I push.
John grimaces, shuffling slightly on his feet. "When the guard came to your room and attacked us."
"Adds, he had already removed your clothing by the time I was able to run out of the room and find the King." John explains, voice soft as he reaches forward to grab my hands.
I yank them away from him, not wanting his comfort.
"He raped me." I state coldly.
John nods.
My teeth grind together painfully as I take in the words, a whirlwind of emotions tumbling through me. I spent most of my life preparing for my inevitable rape, and while the news of the actual attack itself fills me with pain and turmoil, it's the knowledge that both Heloix and John lied to me that fills me with rage.
The fact that everybody knows more about what's happened to my body than I do, and that they have intentionally kept it from me makes me furious. Even more than that, they lied straight to my face when I asked, gaslighting me and acting as if I was being paranoid.
My hands fist up at my sides before I move forward and shove John, needing to get out some of my anger.
"Get back to work." I snap my head to the side and glare at the guard that spoke to us.
"No." I snap
He steps forward, his scowl growing as he approaches. Does he not recognize me? At this point most, if not all, of the Beasts leave me alone.
"I said get the fuck back to work." He snarls, his eyes darkening.
The guard takes another threatening step towards me, but I hold my ground.
"Who the fuck do you think you are talking to your King's mate like that?" I ask, too angry to care about how much of a snob that question makes me sound like.
The guard stares at me, shocked, and I'm sure that John's expression matches, but I don't care. I'm sick of Heloix determining every aspect of my life, only to then turn around and promise that I'm in control of my decisions.
I'm going to take charge of who knows what about me.
John grabs my arm to stop me as I turn away, but I shake him off and march into the castle, ignoring the two pairs of footsteps that scurry in behind me.
"You!" I yell, pointing to the human squatting on the floor cleaning the baseboards.
She looks up at me with wide eyes, her hands freezing in their movements. "Did you know that I'm Heloix's mate?"
I don't wait for an answer before moving into the next room, proclaiming my truth to the humans and Beasts inside. This repeats itself a couple more times, and before I know it there is a crowd following me, everybody clearly amused by the hysterical woman running throughout the castle screaming that she is the King's mate.
Moving into the main hall, I spot a cluster of guards standing along the far wall and match over to them, watching as they turn and look at the crowd in shock. Heloix's Second is within the cluster, and I lock eyes with him as I speak.
"Exciting news for you. I'm Heloix's mate." The crowd behind me cheers, making a game to do so every time I repeat the words, and I quickly move on to the next room.
I make it through three more before Heloix shows up, his face red and eyes dark as he storms into the room I'm in.
The crowd silences, but remains put, eager to watch the show go down.
Heloix rushes forward and grabs my arms, ducking down so he's eye level with me.
"Let's go upstairs and talk." He murmurs, glancing around at the mixture of Beasts and humans that loiter about within the room.
Heloix growls at the sight of them, a threatening sound that pebbles my skin with goosebumps. "Get back to work."
"No!" I immediately respond, yanking my arms out of his.
Heloix sighs and reaches for me once more, his actions gentle despite the anger that lies within his eyes. I wish to poke him in those eyes.
"Deny me, Heloix!" I scream, arms spread out as I gesture to the observers. "Tell everybody here your truth. Am I your mate or not?"
Heloix's eyes flash.
"What? Upset you aren't in control of the narrative?"