Chapter Entry 9
My eyelids fluttered, my brain waking from its forced slumber. The bright light accosted my pupils causing my eyes to water. I blinked heavily, allowing my pupils to adjust to the stark walls and phosphorescence. My head lulled, but I was sitting upright, in an awkward chair, hands bound tight behind. My head throbbed and pounded.
“Where am I?” I breathed aloud.
A figure behind me answered, “You’re safe.”
“If I’m so safe, then why am I chained and why the hell was I knocked out, oh, and kidnapped,” I seethed, the handcuffs securing me to the metal chair clanged loudly. My anger blurred any ounce of fear.
The figure stepped forward. His face came into view. His skin was pale, his nose angled, his eyes dark and vacant. His dark brown hair buzzed short. This was the same man I glimpsed the first time. The memories were coming back. I swallowed slightly but remained calm.
“What do you want?” I asked.
“So many things,” the man grunted, but the sound of a swinging door stopped him short. He glanced towards the door, and in walked another pale-faced white man, except this one was dressed as a doctor.
“Danielle, you’re awake,” he smiled warmly behind thick, brown glasses, a salt and peppered beard, and perfect teeth.
“Marcus, remove those cuffs, she isn’t a prisoner,” he commanded.
Marcus nodded through gritted teeth. So, this guy was in charge.
“Sorry about that,” he smiled, taking a seat across from me and placing a thick manila folder on the stainless-steel table that divided us.
“Why am I here? Who are you?” I asked again, staring directly into the doctor’s blue eyes. “Was it my computer?” I couldn’t stop the word vomit.
“No,” the doctor chuckled, “Although you could get into serious trouble for that young lady,” he added.
“My name is Dr. Anthony Swartz,” he aired officially as if he was introducing himself to me as his patient. “And I must admit, Danielle, there is no easy way to say this, but we have been watching you for some time.”
My head throbbed from the whiskey withdrawal and whatever concoction I was knocked out with. “That’s not creepy or anything,” I joked.
He smiled but didn’t bite. “Let me better explain why you’re here. Your blood, DNA, IQ, and personality profile all match the type of subject we are looking for to be a part of something special.” His face lit up and broadened into a crazed grin.
“What if I told you we could manipulate your DNA in such a way to make you smarter, stronger, faster, more analytical, and with fewer abnormalities,” Dr. Swartz beamed, his eyes lighting up.
“I would say you were crazy,” I uttered.
“Well, call me crazy then, because, through epigenetic modification and genetic engineering, we have been able to unlock the human brain potential. Think of it as a massive software upgrade. If we cut your genes at a specific place of interest then we can manipulate that DNA. We can reinsert what we want, and your body would never be the wiser.”
“And you want to try this software upgrade on me?” I scoffed.
“With your consent, of course, ” he added, “But more than that. We want to offer you an opportunity. You will be provided with elite training, both physical, mental, and educational. You will be paid handsomely for your services. And you would be doing a great service not only to science but to this country.”
My brow furrowed, this sounded too good to be true. “So, you want me to join the military?”
The doctor chuckled, “Not exactly. You would train like the special forces, among other additional skills, but this program operates separately from the government.” Dr. Swartz’s voice rose an octave as he finished that thought. This was some covert spy shit.
I nodded slightly, “Well, I’ve listened to you spout all the benefits, what’s the catch?”
The doctor shook his head as if he knew I would ask this next. “You will have to give up your current life, your friends, family, dreams, aspirations. Danielle Watson will die to the rest of the world forever. To the rest of the world, you will no longer exist.”
I thought for a moment, it still sounded too good to be true. “And if I say no?”
“Well, you’ll be free to go, with several mind-altering substances pumped into your system of course,” Dr. Swartz answered shakily. He was either lying or had an overtly anxious nature.
I sat in silence for several moments. “How many people have you tried this on?”
“You will be the tenth subject,” he trailed with that same tentative shrill.
“How much money are we talking? And what exactly would I have to do?” I kept pumping him with questions, throwing him off balance. I learned that with an overload of questions, the human brain is more likely to systematically tell the truth.
“You will be set for life,” the doctor grinned.
“And my job description would entail?” I asked again, growing impatient.
“To summarize, you would put your new skills to use by providing information, obtaining information, or neutralizing potential threats to our country. The position will require extensive travel, but once trained you can reside in the city of your choosing, within the United States of course,” Dr. Swartz stated with an air of dignity.
Behold, secret spy shit.
“And how do you know I would want to do that or have what it takes?” I smirked.
“As I said before, we have been watching you, since you were born.” My eyes flit to the file before him. He noticed.
“In this file, we have everything we need to know. Every doctor’s visit, report, therapy sessions...” Dr. Swartz paused. I knew what he was referring to. After Annie’s death and the night with Jack, I literally wanted to die. I took to cutting myself, anything to make the pain bearable, to put a name to it, a tangible feeling.
On my final attempt, Richard found me lying in a pool of my own blood. I had cut too deep. I was rushed to the hospital where I was deemed unfit and a danger to myself and others. I spent two months in a psychiatric hospital and until now, had done everything in my power to bury deep within the recesses of my unconscious mind.
Dr. Swartz could see my realizations, my “come to Jesus” moment if you will.
“I think it’s safe to say we know everything about you, even what you did to Jack...”
My eyes shot up meeting his. How did they know about that? And if they knew, why didn’t I ever get arrested? I had to play it cool.
“I see, and why are those admirable qualities? If I did what you are claiming to Jack, why am I not locked up?”
Dr. Swartz chuckled aloud, shaking his head, “You are not locked up because you concealed the evidence and staged it perfectly. Your mind is extraordinary. You perceive the world, people, and problems as black and white. You see life and death as black and white. A psychologist might see a young woman with extreme sociopathic tendencies, but I see untapped potential. I see a mind I want to study, to perfect, a tool that could be sharpened, fine-tuned to a lethal weapon.”
I grit my teeth. He had read my file. My therapist warned my parents when I was in middle school, let’s be honest, elementary school, that I had sociopathic tendencies, that I should be monitored, and that I could potentially be dangerous not only to myself but others. I tried my best over the years to appear as normal as possible, to listen to the puny white angel on my shoulder with Annie’s face, instead of the raging black monster that wanted to kill anyone and everyone who angered me. This doctor just killed that angel. He stuck a knife into her heart forever.
I was dangerous. I killed Jack with my bare hands, wrapping those ridiculous video game cords around his neck and staged it as suicide. The blackness filled my heart, my limbs, and my mind. I closed my eyes and allowed her rage to fill me. I swelled with pride, the fear faded, I was finally becoming me. I opened my eyes, which suddenly felt wider, different. They locked with Dr. Swartz. He gulped slightly. He just witnessed my transformation from a caged caterpillar to a mother freaking dragon.
The sides of my mouth curled into a sinister grin, “What does this procedure entail?”