Slay My Soul

How dare they! It is as though I am nothing more than a broodmare or an unpaid hooker. How easily they expect me to lie on my back for the next mate. How quick they are to dismiss Reece's death and look for his replacement. The disrespect to both myself and Reece's memory sickens me. I have to get out before I let my fists do the talking.

I angrily throw my chair, stomping to the door and throwing it open. I turn my head to yell at the proxy (who is essentially blackmailing me to fuck two more men or I will sentence them all to death) only to collide with a cinnamon donut-scented, tingly wall, before ricocheting off and landing on my ass - hard. I cringe as the word 'mate' reaches my ears. I shake my head in panic, tears blurring my vision as I crawl backward.

"Oh Eve," the voice rumbles sadly, as I vehemently shake my head in denial. The blurred figure kneels down at my level and swipes away my tears. Tingles erupt everywhere he touches my skin. I pull my head away sharply. "I'm so sorry Eve, I didn't know. It all makes sense now. I thought I was losing my mind." I can hear Darius cursing behind me and the proxy muttering about that being nice and easy. I knuckle the tears from my eyes and focus on the man kneeling in front of me.

His dark hair comes into view, long on top and short on the bottom. Viking style, he had once informed me. His dark brown eyes are surrounded by long eyelashes, looking at me with a mixture of longing and sadness. His teeth worry at his full bottom lip.

"Max-" My voice breaks. The Fates are replacing my Reece with my friend Max, Darius's beta. At least it is someone I already know I think bitterly. A dry laugh crawls out of my throat. "I can't-. I can't be here right now," I admit, stumbling to my feet and stepping around the man before hurrying out the door. Thankfully, he only sighs but does not try to stop me.

I change into my wolf and run. I run till I can't go any further. I trot into the clearing where the tent still sits and I transform into my human form. I climb into the tent and onto the bed, moving to the side Reece had slept on, his scent still trapped in the linen. I hug his pillow to me and draw in a deep lungful of his scent, which both soothes and tortures my soul at the same time. The last time I had touched Reece was here and that last time I had felt our love for each other grow even more than I'd ever thought possible. How was I supposed to move on and accept a replacement? Wouldn't it be betraying his memory to take another in his place? I know I am fighting the inevitable but I can't stop my mind from wishing for impossible things and tying itself in knots of self-loathing.

Of all the people who it could have been, it is Max. Max is a friend, someone I sparred & trained with. He is hard working and loyal, an excellent beta. I have never looked at him in any way other than as a friend. I was already knee-deep in three men when we met. Max is safe, funny, and easy to be around. But Max is not Reece.

Tingles erupt on my shoulder and I jerk away, snarling. Max kneels on the ground, purposely making himself small, giving me control of the situation.

"Eve, I am not Reece. They are wrong. I am not his replacement," he says calmly. My eyes jerk to his. What in the fuckety fuck is he playing at? He's clearly a mate. "What you and Reece had, can never be bettered, can never be pushed aside. Reece may not be here anymore but he is still and will forever be your mate. I would never even dream of trying to step on that, or compete with that." My shoulders slump with relief. "I would rather you look at me as just another of your incoming mates. Reece's position is still his. I'm just another link in the chain. One of those unwanted, pesky mates that you have to get used to having around because the prophecy sucks and the mate bond is bullshit, but you aren't going to make it easy on the poor schmuck regardless. That person I can be."

I snort. Max knows me too well.

"I'm surprised the others let you come after me," I say, looking at him properly.

"I said I was going for a walk to think. Your shadow's watching though, making sure I'm being honorable with his lady love." He waves to a tree where Acassus sits in hound form hiding in the shadows. "You know something weird happened a while back, I'm not sure if the guys ever told you. Do you mind if I tell you a little story?" I motion for him to continue. "I met my mate several years ago, pretty little thing. She was shy and quietly spoken. Her name was Tamsin. She was the most beautiful creature I had ever seen." I felt an unfamiliar wave of jealousy hit me and quickly shoved it down, stupid bond. "We took our relationship slowly, wanting to get to know each other our own way, rather than blindly following the mating bond. Everything was going great until one night she was driving home from college. She was waiting at an intersection and a truck's tire blew out as it was about to go past her. The driver lost control and plowed straight into her, killing her instantly. That night, my mate died unbonded in a freak accident. We hadn't even marked each other, yet it still hurt horrifically, and suddenly I was alone, never to have a soul mate again. I missed her terribly. I can't even fathom how bad you are hurting, being fully mated to Reece when you lost him." Max averts his eyes and clears his throat. "I got better at dealing with my loss over time and began to move on with my life. Then one day I was summoned to watch over the pack house because you were in heat. I've guarded plenty of couples when heats were involved and have never been affected. My mate bond, even though not consummated, made it that way. But that day at the pack house, the scent of you affected me and I had to haul ass out of there. It confused the fuck out of me. I couldn't understand why I was affected by you, so I stayed away. When it was over, every time I saw you I felt myself come alive again. Even your everyday scent was affecting me. I would find myself looking for you, watching you, soaking you in when I did see you. I knew it wasn't right, you were mated and it wasn't to me. I tried my hardest to stay away. The other guys noticed me watching you like an obsessed puppy ,so I made sure I didn't get too close to you. I tried to keep my head down. I thought I was fucked in the head, mooning over an already mated woman. Eve, despite the heads up the Fates tried to give me, I was just as surprised to feel the tingles as you were. I never thought I would feel them again. I also know you feel exactly like I do at the moment and have the same questions in your head."

"You have no idea what's in my head," I whisper.

"You're thinking - how am I supposed to go from friends to more? Am I betraying the memory of my mate if I do this? You are feeling frustrated that the Fates have put you on a path where you know that we have to accept each other to complete it. You are feeling forced and backed into a corner. And at the same time you're thinking thank God it's someone I already know and trust. I am not Reece. I have no intention of trying to be him. But I am your friend and I swear I won't hurt you or rush you while we get our heads around this. I will admit though, I am selfish. I will not walk away from this. I thought I was destined to be forever alone. To never feel the tingle of a bond again. I thought I had a future of nothingness. Now I have hope. Please Eve, let me continue to be your friend and let things flow naturally as they will. Please let me have hope for a future."

His eyes implore me to listen, to accept him on some level. He is right. As someone who had lost a mate, he understands. This is why the Fates have chosen him. Although, why they are so hell-bent on me having two wolf mates, continues to be a mystery.

"You are not Reece," I tell him, looking into his eyes. I see his shoulders slump, sadness oozing from his pores. "But you are my friend and I am glad in a fucked up way that it's you. At least we already have a foundation to start with. You're right, you understand me. That is exactly what was going on in my head."

"Hug it out?" He asks holding out his arms. I hesitantly wrap my arms around him, feeling the tingles erupt over my skin. His body shudders as he experiences the tingles himself and tucks his nose into my neck.

"I swear Eve, I won't let you down. This is unexpected for us both but we can find our footing together."

I close my eyes and think of Reece. He always liked Max and I would like to think, of all the wolves that could have stepped forward, he would approve of the one I have been given.